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Registered: 12/08/02
Posts: 6,906
Loc: Central Oregon Flag
Last seen: 2 years, 8 months
new poetry
    #2913088 - 07/21/04 07:06 PM (13 years, 10 months ago)

i've had much inspiration for poetry recently, as my girlfriend and i just broke up a few weeks ago. it was hell for awhile but things are getting better. writing always seems to help some.. anyways these are all about her. i sent them to her in an email, they probably didn't make her feel too good about herself.

talking to me in your sweet, soft voice
luring me out of solitary shrinkwrap
i was your new perfect toy.

you took me out of the box
one i had been in for so many days
gave me a home as your perfect toy.

arms around me as we slept that night
holding me like i was the softest of stuffed animals
mending your broken heart with your new perfect toy.

running your fingers through my hair
a touch that once gave comfort
for i was your perfect toy.

tossing me between your hands,
bouncing me against cold walls
never quite knowing what to do with such a perfect toy.

you could see the cracks beginning to form
after many times being thrown against the wall
fragile was your perfect toy.

the cracks deepened as i fell apart in your hands
neither of us bothering to put the pieces back together
you threw away your new perfect toy.


why do i bother hanging on,
to something that's never coming back?
it flees further and further away,
yet never far out of my sight.
standing at a distance both close and far,
it taunts me with evil words.
you're never coming back this way,
i hear it in your voice,
i see it in your eyes.
you're already on another long walk,
toward something more promising,
something that wont hang on so tight.


these tender sores on my palms,
burnt into flesh to stop myself from caring.
open wounds, still stinging when touched,
as i took off the mask you were wearing.
your cold gaze and words once unsaid,
little by little the wounds started tearing.
tore me to pieces with the last words you spoke,
left me to kill the pain i've been bearing.


we built this bridge together-
lived on it
loved it
embraced it
fell apart in stormy weather-
rotting wood
broken bolts
water rising
never bothering to make things ok-
tired eyes
sour kisses
broken bridges
we watched it slowly burn away-
splintered feet
bleeding hands
broken hearts


call me bitter
call me sweet
severed heart
broken feet
feed me lies
i cannot run
kick at me
it's all in fun
tear me open
sew me together
the perfect disease
chains and leather


these memories of you
i burn away
all that you meant to me
fades to grey
everything you taught me
i must kill
the void you created
i must fill


my skin is cracked and bruised,
blemished by forced detatchment.
tears have long since faded away,
evaporated by forced apathy.
my heart has grown colder than ever,
calloused by forced solitude.
these eyes have lost their gente gaze,
hardened by forced hatred.


you fed me sweet fruit,
healed me with nourishing hands.
now i am choking.

fruit that went bad fast,
rotted within my weak stomach.
turned my insides grey.

too late to vomit,
to rid my body of this poison.
picking scabs to heal the ulcers.

food always seems to taste better,
after long terms of malnourishment.
especially fruit.


your love is a disease,
a virus constantly changing.
adapting to it's host.

the infection feels warm at first,
very comforting.
cradling the heart and lowering defenses.

antibodies cannot be developed,
the body accepts the virus as it's own.
grows with it.

disease continues to spread,
the body still assuming it's in good health.
soon the brain is infected.

the body realizes the symptoms,
but chooses to ignore them.
comforting itself with sweet lies.

eventually all life is sucked from the host,
it no longer has any use for the virus.
she begins her search for another victim.


i make the incision
on the right side of my arm
dirtying a razorblade
once clean
releasing the pain in blood
once pure
in this second all of my pain
and worries
manifest into a dozen drops
of blood
the pain is wiped off
with two sheets of toilet paper
thrown into their proper place
water stained red
with one flush
one push of a metal handle
my pain is now gone
with a scar to remind me
that things have been much worse
yes, my pain is gone away
until tomorrow comes


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