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OfflinePDU
travel kid vs.amerika
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Registered: 12/04/02
Posts: 10,675
Loc: beautiful BC
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
Been busy getting new problems.
    #2893767 - 07/15/04 05:12 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

So, Here's the deal - i got my silly stint of addiction under control, and ive been prospering immensely. I recently went to my first Rave and actually connected with people like ive never connected before, i felt villified by the overnight friendships made - and no it wasnt chemically artificial.

So i hitch hiked down to warped tour and the driver was the most spiritually inspiring man ive ever met ... the show was mediocre, and the way back was troublesome...

Recently ive been making a bit of money, and doing fairly well for myself - especially being out on my own - My roommate throws a new dimension into this twisted life, but we're damn near brothers and life seems difficult without him... My work life and social life have merged into one - but im rebuilding a fantastic life with my parents, and regaining control and discipline in my life.

For awhile there, with no one telling me what to do, Excess was the name of my game - Excess gluttony in drugs, money and lifestyle ...

_____________________________________________________________________

After getting home from Warped tour i immediately got called into work, and when i got off at 3 in the morning went home, expectin gto see my roommate - No sign of him, an open door, and an open window - everything was torn down in the bathroom - when i walked into my space i immediately realized that i had been jacked - A very generous portion of my recent savings, and a quantity of some of my favorite psychedelics were gone. Nothing else touched ....

To feel as i do now is HORRIBLE. Who would betray me like this, i have good friends - i wouldnt have ever have imagined this - A kick in the face.

To see SO MUCH hardwork, and SO MUCH of my soul torn away from me crushed apart of my soul. I wasnt angry, i hardly even flinched - my bloodpressure didnt rise, and my heart rate remained the same - It was a comforting feeling acknoledging the physical response.

The lifestyle since ive been solo has been focused on Goals - not spiritual or personal ones - more status, and $ one's ... In some perverted way ... Its torn my personality away from me, and ive never felt so astranged from myself. Caught up - Unable to break the cycle - there are dependants and dependee's - How is a normal life possible?

Having so much taken from me was a bit of a wake up call - a forced change...

After living in the crack shack apartment got old - we took over a friends small basement suite - and its very un-cool out there, No transport and far away - distanced... and thats where we are - forced to move out next month..

Ive been considering quitting my job for awhile so i could experience life - Hitch hike, travel, build connections, build friends, build a story, and maybe take some real life knocks away from luxury...

In October it looks like i may have an oppurtunity to move down to Vancouver with a couple friends who will be out on their own for the first time, but are incredibly positive and healthy - good to get me away from this life ive been hating but unable to leave.

Im thinking ill put in my 2 weeks, travel to the Okanagan for a couple weeks in August and stay at my dad's with a friend and just Bum around, In mid August hit up Shamabahla thumbing it, then try and meet some people to travel with there ... Travel until September and go down and stay with some Anarchists somewhere down in East hastings Vancouver and then go spend some time with a Shaman up in the hills, Hitch hike around and try and take care of myself until October and then move down to Van and build a healthy new life down there for myself, I can stay at my parents for awhile if necessary, although it would be more likely i stayed at my dads and worked a Farm in the Okanagan...

Anyways, the only problem is, i dont know people like me - thats why ive been drifting so much in personality being here, ive got nothing to work with - its just me ... and im alone, ive got friends, but they are nothing like me .... I need relation, i need support, and i need advice, and i need experience.

Ive got a bit of money left - a few thousand dollars - im sure i can live off $500 dollars for a couple months, and i would like to take a couple thousand dollars down to vancouver to start out with ....

Im thinking ill take some psychedelics with me and play the part of vendor on the road for awhile... Keep me living, you know?

Any insight into the prediciment called my life would be appreciated beyond what you know.

Much love,

Philosopher.


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GO OUTSIDE.


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OfflineFlusH
Random person on Internet

Registered: 10/23/01
Posts: 2,639
Loc: Bizzaro World
Last seen: 4 hours, 4 minutes
Re: Been busy getting new problems. [Re: PDU]
    #2893925 - 07/15/04 06:08 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Ive been considering quitting my job for awhile so i could experience life - Hitch hike, travel, build connections, build friends, build a story, and maybe take some real life knocks away from luxury...




If I were in your shoes, I would jump at this opportunity. I have been jacked before as well, by my roommate at the time. He left 700$ in damage at the appartment (under my name) and stole a $2500 computer w/ monitor, 1/4lb in pot and some lights. Plus I got evicted the next week because of loud parties we were having. I was quite stressed at the time and quit a good job as a tech at a large printing company to work as a painter.

For me this was necessary to get myself back to baseline. I wanted to go traveling, hop on my bike and go but I had a serious girl back then who is now my wife, and I didn't want to leave her. But the sudden change of pace and new work environment where I could be stoned all day and do a good job was nice. After being in that situation for a year and a half I got my shit back together and now am running my own computer repair company, have my own place where I can throw parties whenever I want without worrying about being evicted.

Take the time to do what you want. Live your life. There is nothing you can do about avenging the person who jacked you. Unless there is alot of evidence, but then you will be putting yourself in shit with the cops when they want to know what was stolen. Besides, worrying about getting even will probably consume your mind from time to time. For me that was a problem.

From being in the same situation I really think it is a good idea to just get out and live your life. Also, watch Easy Rider before you set out on your journey. I watched that whenever I got the possibility during my down time. It really helped keep my mind on the right track when I was feeling lost.

Peace


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OfflineUncleMike
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Registered: 05/18/03
Posts: 964
Loc: S.W. Virginia
Last seen: 8 years, 16 days
Re: Been busy getting new problems. [Re: PDU]
    #2894247 - 07/15/04 07:34 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

Man I know how you feel. To be done in by someone going through your stuff and ripping you off. If you can afford to take the time to do some soul searching than that what I would do. Do it before your too old to.


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Offlineeve69
--=..Did Adam and ...?=--
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Registered: 04/30/03
Posts: 3,855
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Re: Been busy getting new problems. [Re: PDU]
    #2896595 - 07/16/04 12:29 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

Doesn't sound like you have problems, just opportunities. You sound like you're in an ideal situation to just follow your heart without qualms. So just go for it. You'll be a happier man when you're older for having done what you wished to do instead of what you might have felt forced into. Enjoy....

Though it sucks when one gets jacked, think also that they inherited the karma attached to that material thing, whatever it is. Then let it all go and live newly free.


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...or something







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InvisibleHarveyWalbanger
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Registered: 06/24/02
Posts: 3,070
Loc: 8b
Re: Been busy getting new problems. [Re: PDU]
    #2896791 - 07/16/04 01:44 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

..........Ever seen fight club?


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OfflinePuZuZu
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Registered: 05/27/04
Posts: 671
Loc: Idaho (USA)
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
Re: Been busy getting new problems. [Re: PDU]
    #2898253 - 07/16/04 10:16 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

this reminds me of my life. when i felt of the world because i had the fucking clothing, the friends, the money, the experience, the drugs.... then it gets all snatched away from blunt quick anger and you are sent to rehab for a couple months to cool down.

come back, takes a few months to recollect and improve myself. come back up the scale, regain what you have and more then watch as it falls apart soon. i see sometime at the end of the summer something weird happening. extremely good or extremely bad.

i live on the rollercoaster too. i hate when life feels so fucking great and easy that you forget all the stupid shit in life. then that stupid shit bonds together and tears all your physical and mental hopes apart. i've been so strung out on certain shit that i've been neglecting my religious side for a few months. almost a year.

its crazy. high hopes are for the damned. just stick to now and watch your life flow up and down. i've never really had any crazy experiences where i lose my home or get shit stolen but i have seen a taste of it over and over again. its not fun on the downside but soon you'll learn to resist submitting to it and learn to control it. "it" could be anything. good luck with life.


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"If you worried about falling off the bike, you would never get on."
Lance Armstrong



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OfflinePuZuZu
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Registered: 05/27/04
Posts: 671
Loc: Idaho (USA)
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
Re: Been busy getting new problems. [Re: PDU]
    #2898257 - 07/16/04 10:18 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

also whatever you do stay with those who make you feel good. stay active and don't slump around. don't let life pass you by. don't let depression take your soul. i mean it because the round trip back to normality is a fucking pain in the ass. people are there for a reason.


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OfflinePDU
travel kid vs.amerika
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Registered: 12/04/02
Posts: 10,675
Loc: beautiful BC
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
Re: Been busy getting new problems. [Re: PuZuZu]
    #2900552 - 07/17/04 08:15 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

I definatley see all of this as an oppurtunity, an awesome one. This is what ive needed so bad - besides the betrayal and the sentiment involved, im pretty OK with the situation. Alot of people are seeking retribution for me, and the criminal is in sights - My go ahead on the Action is just slightly confused. - Had oughtta just let it go eh?

Im so excited to be leaving - I definatley had the best and most honest talk with mom about everything yesterday, and that was relieving - the only uncertainty comes from my outdoor abilities. I know i can do it, but with how much style? Im preparing mentally the best i can, without a hint of doubt - I know i wont die .... I just wonder how comfortable ill be, I wonder what ill learn ... and if ill get desperate. There's alot of wondering ... but it doesnt even matter, because there is total confidence.

This kid is such a fuck up, he has no idea what its done to my life..

Its awesome i can throw such a positive spin on things..

can anyone offer me any similar stories or resources for my uncertainties.

Where could i pick up a cheap pack?? Supplies? Dates and travel partners?..

Im doin my research ... Send me on my way.

Thanks guys.


--------------------
GO OUTSIDE.


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OfflineHypnoToad
Stranger

Registered: 05/08/04
Posts: 325
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Re: Been busy getting new problems. [Re: PDU]
    #2910087 - 07/20/04 10:19 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

Obviously the person who stole the items must have needed the money if they were desperate enough to steal.Material items are a curse and the curse will only follow him and become worse in the end.He is obviously caught up in the illusion of material things.Who is really in control.The person who "owns" the items or the items.If the person is in control the items being gone would not matter.However if the items are in control one feels lost and desolate without said items.Its no different than any other addiction other than being more deadly since few people see it.

Do not take revenge on the poor fool.If you want revenge file a report at the Police Department.If you take revenge on him personally or instruct or incite others to take revenge,does it really make you any better than he is?


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"There is no fire like lust, no grip like hate, no net like delusions, no river like craving."



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OfflinePDU
travel kid vs.amerika
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Registered: 12/04/02
Posts: 10,675
Loc: beautiful BC
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
Re: Been busy getting new problems. [Re: HypnoToad]
    #2913355 - 07/21/04 08:25 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

revenge was hardly an option. Karma will take care of it, and my clean conscience will be worth it.


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GO OUTSIDE.


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OfflineUncleMike
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Registered: 05/18/03
Posts: 964
Loc: S.W. Virginia
Last seen: 8 years, 16 days
Re: Been busy getting new problems. [Re: PDU]
    #2921664 - 07/23/04 08:14 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

You will be rewarded for letting karma handle the situation.


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Invisiblepoke smot!
floccinocci floofinator
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Registered: 01/08/03
Posts: 5,231
Re: Been busy getting new problems. *DELETED* [Re: PDU]
    #2923202 - 07/24/04 10:49 AM (12 years, 4 months ago)

Post deleted by poke smot!

Reason for deletion: x



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OfflinePDU
travel kid vs.amerika
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Registered: 12/04/02
Posts: 10,675
Loc: beautiful BC
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
Re: Been busy getting new problems. [Re: poke smot!]
    #2924385 - 07/24/04 09:32 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

Well last nite i ate a handful of potent mushrooms with unopened Caps - probably somewhere between 5-9 grams. I was at first alone, and the visuals became all engulfing and the mindfuck extreme. I just kept swearing -

"Fuck, what the hell am i going to do, what am i doing in life? How am i going to pull this all together? Fuck, my life is falling apart."

After awhile a friend came over to use my scale and we went to go track down someone who owes me money. Finally we found him, and i was tripping harder than i have in years - he was at a party and i sat in the car - he made his way out and we had some small talk, and then i sat on the grass - another closer friend came over and talked for a bit, and just got me out of my thought loops and asked if i was ok enough to come join everyone else - Anxiety overwhelmed, but i made my way over - EVERYONE was snorting line's, and i could hardly walk - but everyone was inviting. I switched over my regular patch shorts and sleeveless shirt for Sweats - and got to play in this elaborate house... My tongue was melting into my mouth and my body into the air and ground... It was a reminder of the unity and collective consciousness we're all apart of - it was a wake up call to the true essence of life, and what i can do with it.

Anyways, im keeping it brief - i gotta run.

I feel more confident in my journey now than before but am a bit scared of whats going to happen when i get back. Money is going to be tight, and i doubt ill be able to support myself - The thought of living with my dad is comforting - but the idea of being back at my mothers is terrifying. Ill see what i can hook up, but life is going to be a challenge. I need direction, and i dont know if thats doing it for myself, or looking for help.

Still looking..


--------------------
GO OUTSIDE.


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OfflineCaRnAgECaNdYS
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Registered: 04/09/04
Posts: 11,505
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Re: Been busy getting new problems. [Re: PDU]
    #2926755 - 07/25/04 07:54 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

I'm sorry, I have absolutely no advise for you. I just read your story and had to reply. Sometimes the last person you expect could be the one who stabs you in the back.
I would take this opportunity to do exactly what you ant. If you want to travel, then go for it. Nows a better time than any right?
I hope everything works out for you!


--------------------

The secret to being funny is to say smart things stupidly, or is it stupid things smartly? Whatever..it's not rocket surgery...or something like that.


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