|
Catstellation
Stranger
Registered: 05/12/20
Posts: 1
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
|
Golden Teachers 10g 145lb 22y/o female (ego death?)
#26666642 - 05/12/20 01:49 PM (3 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
My trip started just before sunset, I usually do mushrooms during the day but I decided it felt like a good time to do them. I also did this alone. I should also note that this is the highest dose I have ever taken, the most I've taken in one day in the past was about 3.5g.
When I first started feeling them kick in, I was in the bathroom brushing my teeth in the mirror. I was looking into my eyes and could feel my life playing through. I was the only one it showed me though (my family or friends weren't a part of this at all). My childhood and my future, kind of just a feeling inside but nothing visible, like I couldn't see myself aging or anything, just a deep feeling of how things will play out.
it wasn't scary at all, it felt like it was preparing me to deal with loved ones dying and new people coming into my life. just the feeling of my human body aging but my soul staying this eternal energy. Becoming okay with that concept is something I've struggled with for a while because I've never lost any loved ones.
Went to my room and I was sitting in my desk chair with my head back just feeling everything coming to me, there were these shapes and outlines that were appearing over everything, with these glowing, bright and rainbow colours...which I've never seen before on mushrooms (colours of any kind).
I could feel my mind just emptying completely of every thought and was just replaced with this feeling of understanding. It felt like my soul was leaving my body. This energy that started in my arms and my hands slowly spread through my body, it was powerful. It was warm and reduced me to the feeling of nothing.
My being just became this shapeless energy and it felt like there was a different, all-knowing energy in front of me guiding me through the trip, it never spoke or used words, just seemed to provide me with feelings and had a glowing aura with no physical traits.
I became extremely aware of the fact that I don't own my mind and I'm just here to observe the thoughts that it has. Something about a third eye opening had kept coming into thoughts and it truly felt like that was happening.
This lasted a while, if I were to guess maybe an hour or two, and I just sat there taking it all in, accepting what it was showing me.
I was getting tired though and everything was calming down so I assumed my peak was over. I wanted to sleep so I laid down in bed and watched some TV. I don't know how long I was laying there but suddenly everything was different, I became extremely aware of the fact that time seemed to vanish, as if it never existed to begin with. I couldn't grasp the words on my TV, they were just sounds with pictures.
The angle of the room wasn't changing at all and when I closed my eyes I could still see the room as if I was still looking. It felt like I have been there since the beginning of everything and would be forever, like it was just how things have always been. Me floating in my bed, with no body, just an awareness of being.
My self identity had disappeared and I felt like nothing and everything at the same time, I was aware of the fact that I was separate from my human self. There were definitely some feeling of being an all-knowing god-like being, but also feelings of being absolutely nothing but a field of sight.
I completely lost the concept of space and time, it was like the room at that exact moment was the only thing to ever exist. It was everything, the entire existence of the universe. everything felt completely eternal, just the same present moment that didn't change once. There was this insane feeling of bliss and understanding and appreciation of everything.
I couldn't remember anything about the past, I could only focus on just how things were now. It was apparent that my human body was dead, and this would be my resting place for eternity. It was my spot in the cosmos.
I decided at some point that it was too much to handle and had trouble accepting what was happening to me, so I tried to get up to get some water from my desk across the room, my brain was telling my body to move, but I couldn't feel anything physically. just like that sense (touch) has never existed, and I could only feel the room. The only reason I actually knew I was successfully moving was because I lifted the cup of water up in front of my face and could see it in my hand, but I couldn't feel myself holding it.
It still felt like I was floating in the corner of the room, at all times, this feeling stayed for a long time. And the room looked different, my field of vision had changed and I could see more than the furniture, I think I could feel that my consciousness had taken over this space and I could feel things like sounds and feelings floating throughout it and bumping into each other before disappearing from the realm forever.
I kept going to the washroom to look in the mirror and try to ground myself, and Everytime I did it still felt like I hadn't moved and was still in the corner of the room, but I could see myself in the mirror. Doesn't make much sense but things like this are hard to put into words. It felt like there was something in the space telling me to feel "this is how it's always going to be from now on and to accept it" like I had broken through something huge.
Overall, this was the most spiritual trip I've ever had, I do wish I didn't panic and got to enjoy it more.
Edited by Catstellation (05/12/20 01:51 PM)
|
Happinessfeeling
GOD



Registered: 09/19/17
Posts: 684
Last seen: 9 hours, 15 minutes
|
Re: Golden Teachers 10g 145lb 22y/o female (ego death?) [Re: Catstellation] 1
#26729407 - 06/08/20 05:05 PM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Golden Teachers 10g 145lb 22y/o female (ego death?)
NO.
|
DJ Ed
Mushroom Engineer


Registered: 09/04/16
Posts: 2,326
Loc: UK
Last seen: 1 month, 27 days
|
Re: Golden Teachers 10g 145lb 22y/o female (ego death?) [Re: Catstellation]
#26731168 - 06/09/20 11:25 AM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
I don’t know if I’ve missed something here, but you do mean 10g fresh, don’t you?
DJ Ed
-------------------- “It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.” Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind “The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.” Terence McKenna

|
thevoluntaryway
Stranger
Registered: 06/23/20
Posts: 4
Last seen: 2 months, 2 days
|
Re: Golden Teachers 10g 145lb 22y/o female (ego death?) [Re: DJ Ed]
#26795454 - 06/30/20 07:59 PM (3 years, 6 months ago) |
|
|
Thank you for sharing and taking the time to write well. Re: Ego-death, you may have gone beyond ego without the intensely uncomfortable feeling of being forced to let go, without having to have that fight.
|
MindMeower
lawnmower for the brain



Registered: 05/10/19
Posts: 341
|
Re: Golden Teachers 10g 145lb 22y/o female (ego death?) [Re: thevoluntaryway]
#26796258 - 07/01/20 05:15 AM (3 years, 6 months ago) |
|
|
This sounds like a pretty interesting trip, I wouldn't mind having one like it at all.
-------------------- M(e)owing minds
|
Happinessfeeling
GOD



Registered: 09/19/17
Posts: 684
Last seen: 9 hours, 15 minutes
|
Re: Golden Teachers 10g 145lb 22y/o female (ego death?) [Re: MindMeower]
#28630192 - 01/21/24 05:14 PM (6 days, 2 hours ago) |
|
|
I AM LORD KRISHNA. Magic Mushrooms (psilocybin mushrooms) are Lord Krishna Nirvana Mushrooms. You'll only achieve ego-death, enlightenment, and nirvana through magic mushrooms if I GRANT you that. If you're a horrible person and I don't love you, my Lord Krishna Nirvana Mushrooms will NEVER give you ego-death, enlightenment, or Nirvana. It's that simple. I am Lord Krishna Masta Killa King Wu-Tang, and I AM Magic Mushrooms. I hope that everyone on the Shroomery UNDERSTANDS ME NOW.
Lord Gautauma Buddha Allah Masta Killa King Wu-Tang Om Krishna (HappinessFeeling a.k.a. Nishith Vijay)
|
Soul Flight
Stranger
Registered: 05/04/23
Posts: 236
Last seen: 4 hours, 34 minutes
|
Re: Golden Teachers 10g 145lb 22y/o female (ego death?) [Re: Catstellation]
#28631255 - 01/22/24 04:46 PM (5 days, 2 hours ago) |
|
|
Close enough to ego death. Seeing through time and having no self is the key.
When you have ego death, you are pretty sure of it. You usually just go blank and cry and are in total awe.
Hope you had fun. The mushroom is sneaky and will go reverse or sideways on you so be prepared. It is a trickster. Be safe.
|
PancyanterA
Stranger
Registered: 12/17/22
Posts: 75
Last seen: 10 hours, 4 minutes
|
Re: Golden Teachers 10g 145lb 22y/o female (ego death?) [Re: Soul Flight]
#28631355 - 01/22/24 06:30 PM (5 days, 45 minutes ago) |
|
|
Funny because my ten gram experience was similar to an extent, in a way…. but what is exactly the same 100%;
“Overall, this was the most spiritual trip I've ever had, I do wish I didn't panic and got to enjoy it more.”
Reading this report was the first time that’s actually kind of made me want to do it again, and it’s been a little while. The whole time reading though, up until the very end, I was like I can’t believe she’s not freaking out it sounds so beautiful I was freaking out!!
|
Happinessfeeling
GOD



Registered: 09/19/17
Posts: 684
Last seen: 9 hours, 15 minutes
|
Re: Golden Teachers 10g 145lb 22y/o female (ego death?) [Re: Soul Flight]
#28632030 - 01/23/24 11:03 AM (4 days, 8 hours ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Soul Flight said: Close enough to ego death. Seeing through time and having no self is the key.
When you have ego death, you are pretty sure of it. You usually just go blank and cry and are in total awe.
Hope you had fun. The mushroom is sneaky and will go reverse or sideways on you so be prepared. It is a trickster. Be safe. 
YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY NEVER EXPERIENCED EGO-DEATH. Stop fucking lying. I AM THE ONLY MAN TO EVER EXPERIENCE FULL EGO-DEATH. I am Gautauma Buddha King Wu-Tang Allah Masta Killa. I AM GOD. I REPEAT, I AM THE ONLY MAN THAT HAS EVER EXPERIENCED EGO-DEATH. I am the ONLY man to EVER achieve the state known as "Maha-Nirvana." You stupid fucking wannabe-mystic hippies have never even come close to experiencing ego-death, never. I AM GAUTAUMA BUDDHA, THE FIRST MAN TO EVER FIND NIRVANA EVER. I HOPE you get what I'm saying.
King Wu-Tang Allah Masta Killa Gautauma Buddha Lord Balakrishna (HappinessFeeling a.k.a. Nishith Vijay)
|
ShiroiTora
LBM



Registered: 03/16/21
Posts: 616
Loc: South Africa
Last seen: 1 day, 18 hours
|
Re: Golden Teachers 10g 145lb 22y/o female (ego death?) [Re: Catstellation]
#28635137 - 01/26/24 12:44 AM (1 day, 18 hours ago) |
|
|
@happinesfeeling And in what POSSIBLE version of the universe would Krishna carry himself like some badly behaved child, like you are doing now? Shame on you defiling not only Krishna, but Siddhartha's name like that.
|
Pendleton
Stranger to no one
Registered: 01/14/24
Posts: 6
Last seen: 3 hours, 50 minutes
|
Re: Golden Teachers 10g 145lb 22y/o female (ego death?) [Re: Happinessfeeling]
#28636464 - 01/27/24 06:35 AM (12 hours, 40 minutes ago) |
|
|
Lord Krishna is feeling some insecurity to get involved in a 3 year old thread to declare their supremacy. lol
|
|