Soo, lets separate some bits here..
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encryptor said: Last year I put my wife on my medical/dental insurance because she wasn't working. She ended up getting a job at a bank. Last November we had an enrollment period for medical/dental insurance. She did not show me the costs and wanted to be on my insurance. I was thinking that was fine, figuring it would be cheaper, I get to contribute to my HSA at the family maximum. However, now I find out having separate medical/dental insurances would have been cheaper than combining onto one. She tells me to forget it because it's already past the enrollment window.
She's right. Oops, too late. Now you know, and can check the math in the future.
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I think she avoided telling me the cost on purpose because I'm splitting bills 72/28 percent based on our incomes. She pays her own car insurance because it's a separate bill. Should I be covering her medical/dental insurance based on our incomes too? We already split the rent and groceries by 72/28. She has the 28%, so it's costing me more.
72/28 seems.. oddly specific. What exactly are you asking here? You feel like because she's on your insurance, that means you're paying 100% of that bill? So you need her to pay the extra, what $50, $100, whatever a month.. for.. what? Does it really matter if this pushes the percentage to 75/25?
What I'd worry about is:
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There's pro's and con's in this marriage, but I'm not desiring sex from her anymore and we've only been married 1 year. I feel that I am better off by myself. Thank goodness no kids, no combined bank account (although she dislikes this), and prenuptial agreement in place. I am protecting my own finances.
So.. she wants to be on your health insurance, she wants to combine finances, does she want kids too? Sounds like she wants a marriage, but you're treating her like a roommate. I dunno man. Why did you get into this marriage? What changed? I think if you approach your marriage as if it's just a business deal then.. well.. that's what you get.
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