Hi, just a bit about me to know where I'm coming from:
I am 27-year-old guy, and I have a decent life... Some mental issues, but I'm tackling them. I have a good-paying job that I enjoy, and I do it with my friends. Despite my mental issues, I consider my life to be very good; I'm in a good mental state. I have ADHD, am very introverted, and a bit socially awkward, but I like life and I like who I am for the most part.
I am writing this because I want to share my last two trips and want to know your opinion on why this happened, because before this, every experience with shrooms was fun.
This time the first trip was kind of scary at first but turned good later. The big problem was my bowel movements and a feeling of doom. I had to pee, poop, and blow my nose a lot, lol.
Last week, I bought a bunch of shrooms. I love doing shrooms every six months or so; it helps with my mental state a lot. I've done them probably around 20 times in my life, not exactly sure, but definitely not a new tripper. So, I was really hyped to do them again, it was some 3 days before new years. I weighed out 3 grams and chopped them down to little tiny bits. I didn't know the potency or the name, but the guy that gave them to me is my friend, and he always has pretty good shrooms, grows them himself. So, I just decided to squeeze out an orange and two lemons and a tiny bit of water and put the 3g's of the good stuff inside. And I have taken 3g of lemon tek before but never while I was sick, like I was this time. But tbh I wasnt super sick, I was recovering well at this point, if I was very sick I wouldnt even consider shrooms.
I've done it many times before; I like it more than chewing on them raw (though I like that, too, but if I chew them, I love to have some chocolate for the aftertaste). I didn't filter out the pieces, as I never do; I just gulp it down and some water afterwards (maybe a mistake for my already sensitive stomach from sickness)...
I was planning for this trip the whole day; I cleaned my room perfectly and made it really cozy, put on the LED lights to set the atmosphere, lit candles, had good focus and a good mindset the whole day. I pre-made a bunch of tea and a bit of food to eat if I would feel like it later, and I downloaded Planet Earth 3 because I love watching nature stuff on shrooms; it impresses me deeply. I was watching some old comedy show that I love to my heart when I drank the lemon tek, and I was having a good time. I was smoking weed the whole day (as I do), pre-rolled four joints, everything was planned well, I always love to smoke weed on shrooms... Well, always, until today, but today weed never even crossed my mind with this trip.
So maybe 30 minutes or less after drinking the tek, it starts getting to me fast. I guess it was just too much, too quickly. Because this time, when it hit me, I had a different feeling than usual; I had an underlying feeling of being scared of something and very anxious. Anxiety on the come-up is normal for me, so I didn't think that was too strange. But that underlying feeling of impending doom, when you feel like something bad will happen. When I get through the come-up, I always had such a good time alone on the shrooms. But this time the anxiety didn't go away; I was tripping, but I was still in that state—not comfortable, happy, and amazed with life like I usually am on shrooms. I was scared of the nature show; something about it scared me further. David's voice didn't calm me down like it usually does; it freaked me out, and something about the show made me scared and made me think about death and mortality, and I blocked it out because it didn't make me feel good.
I'm usually good with that; if I feel like a bad trip or bad thoughts are coming, I can force myself to take control and think about the good stuff and tell myself it's all going to be alright. Almost never had a bad trip, not with shrooms, once I got close, but it wasn't a full-blown bad trip; it was bad at a particular moment, but then it turned good. All of my trips with shrooms in the last 10 years were positive.
So I closed the Planet Earth and put on the comedy show again, and that made it better. But soon I had enough of that too because one of the guys had such a weird face to look at; it was freaking me out. I was switching between laying in bed and standing up to switch up the shows from comedy to Planet Earth about 6 times until I had enough and turned off the computer and laid back down in bed until I had to go to the toilet because I felt I needed to pee so hard.
Good time to mention, I've been sick for the last week, cough, stuffed nose, sore throat, etc... And on this trip, I think that's what did me in. I was on the toilet probably 6 times or more throughout the night. I wanted to just pee, but when I peed, then liquid diarrhea also came out. I was like, what the heck 😅 and it felt so weird. I wanted to pee but didn't pee almost nothing, just shitted out the liquid diarrhea, and I didn't even push hard at all; it just came out. I know it's kind of weird and nasty, but if I left that out, then the trip report would not be whole. And this trip to the bathroom repeated many times that night; it always felt like I had to pee so hard but ended up just peeing a little with diarrhea. It was uncomfortable as I was also tripping really hard, and I still had that bad feeling from the start. I could barely stand, only sit or lay down.
I went to the bed but it was so uncomfortable and sooo hot, and I thought maybe a shower will help me. When I went to the shower, I felt like my trip got so much more intense. Maybe because of hot/very warm water? I wanted to go out but was tripping so hard, and I just stayed sitting down in the shower for a while. It felt like I was there forever but clearly not since the hot water was still running. When I got myself a little more together I climbed out of the bath with difficulty.
I went back to the bed. You know that feeling when you're tripping hard, closing your eyes and laying down, and your hand covering your eyes because the thing, the powerful bright light, it's too bright to look at? Well, your eyes are closed, but you still see it when you're facing it; it's like looking at the sun but infinitely times more powerful, and you just keep covering your eyes while peeking at it as much as you can, but never can fully with both eyes... It feels like I'm staring at god or a powerful force in the universe, and it's staring down at me (I'm not religious, but this happens to me multiple times, with this light that is too bright to look at but I love to and want to look at it) ... I was tripping so hard at this point; I couldn't do anything but roll over on the bed constantly to find a comfortable position, and when I opened my eyes, the LED lights were trippy as fuck but not in a good way, I had to turn all the lights off. The blinds weren't just moving; they were opening and closing. I couldn't do anything but experience the moments, but all I wanted was to sleep and stop tripping. And that is weird because usually, I love the visuals, and when it ends, I'm usually like '' oh, that was nice; wish it lasted a bit longer '', but not this time...and it want even the most visuals I exoerinced on trips but it was the most uncomfortable at this point.
So my whole night I was switching from tripping in the bed wanting to sleep and stop tripping and seeing the powerful light facing me from the universe to going to the bathroom to pee but mostly just shit. I didn't even smoke one joint, which I usually love doing, on shrooms or not.
At some point, I wondered if I'm gonna ever stop tripping because I felt like more than 5 hours have passed, and usually, I stop tripping hard after 4 hours... Only 2 hours have passed, when I looked at the phone...
At some point tho, , the trip got more bearable, though I was still tripping pretty hard. Somewhere in the trip, I actually got to enjoy myself and had some amazing visuals and experience. I think because the bad feeling of doom was finally gone. I was looking at my face in the bathroom mirror, how it was shifting from shrooms, but I really liked it, and I made all kinda goofy faces and had fun, and I thought to myself that I like who I am. And I laid back down in the bed and was flickering my phone, opening and closing the app drawer; it made me think that the phone screen was my eye, and the drawer moving up and down was my eyelids. The apps turned to wires, and I felt like this whole world is digital; even us, the living beings, it's all signals and connections. I kept doing that for a long time, it was amazing. I felt like the simulation theory is real, and I was looking behind it; I saw the signals coming from my body and from the universe and the world.
So it wasn't a REALLY bad trip, per se, just a really weird one, and shitting the whole night was really uncomfortable. I never really panicked because I can tell myself it will pass, but it was definitely the weirdest trip I ever experienced. Was mostly not fun, but I actually even had some fun after the initial 3 hours or so.
So help me figure it out. Why did I get that feeling of doom? Were the shrooms apparently that strong? I never took more than 4 grams, but those 4 grams were amazing and no bad feeling like this night with 3 grams. But it's true that those 4 were not lemon tek, and this one was.
Maybe the trip started bad because I was sick already? That must have been it, right? Because mentally I was ready and in a good state. And the whole week I wasn't eating that much either, so maybe that contributes, too.
And maybe I wouldn't have had such bad diarrhea if it wasn't for me just eating soup that day because I had no appetite for other things 😅 that was a dumb decision, looking back at it. Should have forced myself to eat something concrete. But I still don't know where that bad feeling came from; I always get anxiety on the come-up, but this bad feeling I experienced the first time on shrooms.
My thinking is that shrooms were maybe very strong, and I was sick and didn't eat enough. So it's likely all my fault for this feeling. What are your thoughts, do you agree?
3 days later - Second trip - My first time fainting
After the last trip and some sleep, I actually felt good. This trip three days ago was a positive experience, just not pleasurable as it was other times.
It was New Year's Eve; my cousin visited me, and he wanted to take a bit of shrooms. It was his second time doing shrooms but he only took 0.5 before, and he is sensitive, so I told him that these might be very strong and that he should take 0.5 again, not more. Hes also young, close to 18 so I have to be careful and watch out for him.
Myself, I decided on 2 grams; I thought I lemon tekked 3 a few nights ago; surely these will have almost no effect.
But shit, this was not a good idea. And I did trip. How tf? I have no idea. I know how the tolerance is supposed to work with shrooms, but it definitely didn't work like that for me this time. I have taken low dosages before, and I thought I know what to expect.
I got that feeling of doom again! I got so hot. I could barely stand on my legs. I didn't trip hard visually this time, so the tolerance apparently worked for the visuals, but I got tunneled vision and all-around bad feeling. I had a very weird feeling in my head; it was so heavy. It fucked me up extremely in another way! I was trying to act normal in front of my cousin to not freak him out because he is not so experienced, so I agreed with him to go smoke a joint and walk a bit. There the loud fireworks freaked me out but I didn't show it on the outside. And then we went on a walk, and suddenly I got even hotter, and I told him I need to sit down.
As he told me, while I was sitting down, I just fainted. I had to sit because I felt suddenly that my legs can't support me anymore. But then I just fainted. I came back just a few seconds later, and we sat down against the wall for support and talked. At this point, I felt relieved because I was no longer hot, and I could walk again; it felt good to be able to.
This was my first time ever fainting on any drug. I have to add that we mixed a bit of alcohol too; we drank 2 big glasses of champagne, maybe 0.4L each.
But I have to say that I have done this on many occasions, mixing weed and shrooms and alcohol, and I always felt good, never had a bad experience, let alone fainting. And I dont do it often either, the only thing I do often is smoke weed. So this kind of scared me, to be honest.
So what I am trying to figure out is, why did this happen? Was it (most likely in my opinion) because I was a bit weak from the sickness and didn't eat much the past week? But why did only 2 grams of shrooms affect me so much even after I took 3 grams only 3 days before; the effects shouldn't be this strong, surely? Not visually, but I had that strong feeling of tripping mentally. I don't think it was because of alcohol because I've almost always drank a bit with shrooms, and I am a heavy weed user, so that shouldn't be it either...
TBH I feel really good right now; the second trip was horrible, felt horrible, but after I fainted, I laid down in the bed, and I felt so much better than before. I didn't sleep the whole night, just rolling around the bed, but the bad feeling wasn't there after the fainting, so I was happy.
Also, my cousin had a great night he didn't trip so much visually, but he was laughing his ass off, and the walls did get a little wonky for him even on 0.6 😅 and after my fainting (before midnight) he went outside when I went to the bed and had a lot of fun, so I'm super happy for that too.
In the morning, I felt normal, just tired because I only slept an hour or two, but I was totally fine otherwise. I went to the Shroomery forums and here on Reddit, and apparently, it's not THAT uncommon to faint on shrooms. For me, it was scary because it never happened to me or anyone I know before, but I see now that it's most likely my fault from not eating much good food for the whole week? This seems the most logical reason to me...
In the morning, I was debating if I should ever take shrooms again because it was scary that I trip alone and I could faint and hurt my head... But decided I will because they have done a lot more positive for me in life than negative. I will take a long break again and next time take them in a more "normal" state.
So, these were my two weirdest trips I ever experienced, but luckily, they weren't full-blown bad trips or anything like that. The fainting was the worst and the scariest, and the feeling before the fainting was scary as well. Oh yeah, and this second time there was another positive thing—I didn't have to spend the whole night on the toilet to shit. 😅
Sorry for the spelling mistakes, English is not my first language.
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