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Purple sunset



Registered: 02/14/21
Posts: 1,794
Loc: No Path
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Close & personal with a vulture 5
#28512840 - 10/21/23 10:30 AM (8 months, 3 days ago) |
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Hey you guys. Today on my bike ride I found a turkey vulture in the road. I gave it space and it looked at me without fear, so it jumped up and flew in a circle behind me looking and looking. It coming to fly off into the trees out in the middle of nowhere
I road insanely far and actually broke new ground this morning with my distance. I'm getting better at riding and got in very good shape
So on my way back I seen it again
It did the same thing
It was absolutely beautiful. I seen it so close and low its feathers blowing with the wind. I was far from home just riding
I didn't pay attention to behind me anymore and tried to zip back home. As I'm enjoying a cup of coffee writing this
So I'm a few houses down from home and I couldn't believe what I seen. I believe it actually may have fallowed me very far. I never seen them right outside of my home like this. It was unbelievable to me. All though it may have been a coincidence. I feel in my gut that's the one. It could have really been
So I am inspired to get a tattoo of one and a bald eagle that I felt a connection with not long ago. Which will be about my last 2 tattoos I can fit on my body. They'll both be on my butt cheeks
This vulture is insanely large and wild. I'm thankful I was not attacked by it. But I could pick up on that it felt very intrigued with something about me. It was looking and looking

Lately I've been feeling and putting the puzzles together within. I've come to really understand myself & love myself. I don't feel like the same person I was not long ago. Feel as if I'm evolving like a pokemon. Almost everything inside feels so good but there is only one thing I feel bad about. Like a ying yang kind of thing

It's that I've felt extremely lonely for so long and I used to suppress it. But more so lately I see
I tried meeting women through apps but they always say they'll meet me and I get ghosted. It really hurts. I feel as though they just wanted me to send them sometimes wrong, so they could all laugh at it. but I didn't.
I'm very kind and respectful. I write very normal well mannerd things and mean what I say. So much so that it's detrimental to it all. But I'm just being myself. That's truly how I am. In person I'm actually very normal and kind / well mannered / talk nice & calm
I think it's all just because I was always so shy. I never really asked anyone in person because I don't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. I really just wanted to treat somone really nice and make them feel comfortable. I feel no one understands that and it hurts so much like a cut that won't stop bleeding
I feel as though they truly don't understand how neglected and rejected I feel by literally almost everything in society. I'm so sorry I couldn't fit, but I really do. I feel I do the problem is its not mutual
Where what if I ask and it's the same thing. A lie and they just ghost me and I have to potentially see them around and i just want to feel good, not be laughed at but to be laughed with
So I was just wondering what you think I should do ? I need a little bit of help with this. If you have any advise I'd really appreciate it
Should I just let it flow like a river ?
I can just treat myself really well and everything is ok. But I wish somone understood is all, i wish they understood how it feels and I wish them all well
Excuse me for trying to communicate this. It made me feel better to let it out. But it's something I've felt for so long that I'd always just get high and suppress. Which is probably why I used to chain smoke 20 blunts. But I stopped doing that and really started listening to myself. Listening as if I put a seashell up to my ear and listened deeply to the ocean which is actually my heart / soul and well being
If it never worked out everything will be ok. I'd just hope to try is all so I can leave that feeling behind
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Buster_Brown
L'une


Registered: 09/17/11
Posts: 12,021
Last seen: 50 minutes, 6 seconds
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" Listening as if I put a seashell up to my ear and listened deeply"
Obviously you don't have any money or there wouldn't be a problem, joke joke, but too bad you haven't located a matchmaker who knows just the girl who would profit in your presence.
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TheStallionMang
Do U know who yur fuckin with?


Registered: 10/18/17
Posts: 4,986
Loc:
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Re: Close & personal with a vulture [Re: Buster_Brown]
#28512941 - 10/21/23 12:16 PM (8 months, 3 days ago) |
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"Should I just let it flow like a river?"
Yes, be yourself and let it flow. Also, don't worry so much about being polite and making someone uncomfortable and just say what you wanna say. The ones that don't like it aren't right for you anyway so if you aren't letting things flow, you'll never know
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Buster_Brown
L'une


Registered: 09/17/11
Posts: 12,021
Last seen: 50 minutes, 6 seconds
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My experience is that alienation can occur or just be more acute when introductions are not made thru a third party. A matchmaker can 'save face' as it were while expediting an arrangement.
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Northerner
splelling chceker


Registered: 07/29/12
Posts: 15,004
Loc: FNQ
Last seen: 33 minutes, 3 seconds
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Re: Close & personal with a vulture [Re: Buster_Brown]
#28513151 - 10/21/23 02:51 PM (8 months, 3 days ago) |
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You sound super serious about everything sunset. If you are giving off super serious vibes you're unlikely to attract many women. Most of them want to have fun. Do you practise laughing much? Laughter lightens the heart and paints a rose tint over the world. You say about people laughing with and not at you, maybe step into those shoes if you want them.
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The nearest we ever come to knowing truth is when we are witness to paradox.
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Purple sunset



Registered: 02/14/21
Posts: 1,794
Loc: No Path
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Re: Close & personal with a vulture [Re: Northerner] 1
#28513720 - 10/22/23 06:13 AM (8 months, 2 days ago) |
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Yes all of the time. I am always happy to be honest thank you. It does really show 
I appreciate the consideration
I have friends and everything. Got money. It's all a lot to explain. Everything is pretty sweet. My friends aren't into psychedelics though but good people. I love them so much
Was always just more shy and introverted. Lately I've been trying to be more social
I'm not really into gossiping about people and laughing that way but laughing about other things. Nice things 
Last night at the party I ate lsd and at a point i thought about the vulture. For some reason some people from here popped into my mind like split and some of my dead family. I thought of them. Split told me I'm a light in a world of darkness
Everyone else was drunk as gossip filled the air. I had to interrupt just to say excuse me the floors are sweet and the chairs are chocolate. It made everyone laugh and I was like wow check out these cups. You'd have to have been there
It's like a second family of people I've known for years we truly love eachother and they like it when I eat lsd or whatever but they won't eat it
There isn't a way to meet anyone through them it's something I have to do on my own. All though I'm not alone. My best friend is the same and we are both good guys. I guess I never told them about it besides him because what am I supposed to say
I wish you guys could have been at the party
This chick I worked with who is really good looking I actually hooked up with a good friend and I brought her into our circle. But I never felt anything for her or a attraction to be honest. She is a lot like my own sister. I really see people like as people. She is super cool. It's genuinely like my family
It's her birthday soon and I gave her a shir load of really good weed the best I could give
She found out it was my birthday and had organized a party when I didn't really want to leave my room because I feel bad on my birthday
Maybe there's a lot more to the picture and everything isn't so black and white
I'm not picky I'm just not attracted to women who are fat is all sorry just to be honest. It doesn't mean I think anything wrong about them. I put a lot of care and time into being in good shape and it's a lot. Everyday I care for
I'm just going to let it flow like the river. I feel that's why I like moving and doing things. When water is still mosquitos come so I want to flow for my mind
At the party by the way I discovered I really love TV and I felt so calm on the lsd. For a bit I sat and watched music videos like : 0
Oh my goodness it's wonderful
Right now I'm dry trimming weed and watching cartoons it's the best
I got about 3 hours of sleep and I woke up at about 7am
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Buster_Brown
L'une


Registered: 09/17/11
Posts: 12,021
Last seen: 50 minutes, 6 seconds
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"But I never felt anything for her or a attraction to be honest. She is a lot like my own sister"
That certainly narrows the field considerably which underscores the advantage of a professional in these matters. Marriage Counselors might give references.
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Purple sunset



Registered: 02/14/21
Posts: 1,794
Loc: No Path
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Re: Close & personal with a vulture [Re: Buster_Brown]
#28513745 - 10/22/23 06:55 AM (8 months, 2 days ago) |
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I don't think it does. You'd have to see it man. I went to her home and stuff and met her mom and we are like family
I'm glad I so happenly brought my friend and her together. Who he honestly was going through the same as me. It's almost as if it was meant to be and I think things will go good. I think it's a really good thing
At the party my friend put her bag on the table and unzipped it a bit. The way it looked. I was like oh shit I hope that thing doesn't eat me I wish I took a photo of it but I was living so in the moment lsd is the best. That fucking thing looks like it would jump up and bite. It had pink on the zipper like lips
She showed me all her bags and it was so much fun
I feel a lot more chilled out on lsd lately like I can just sit there on it all night tripping balls
These shitty little shot cups were radiating like lava lamps check them out
I really didn't know I loved TV so much
The thriller was on TV and wow
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