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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,797
Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do.
    #28336358 - 05/26/23 11:52 PM (7 months, 29 days ago)

It's one of the hardest things to learn, to be able to calmly and collectively receive and give productive and constructive criticism in search for a solution to conflicting issues that may arise between individuals or parties.

It has taken me almost 28 years to reach the point of conversation and communication comprehension that I believe and feel I am at during this given period in my life.

I have experienced being able to express concern in an understanding and introspective way that accounts for outside opinions, information and feedback.

I have experienced being able to feel calm and comfortable talking about my fantasies and expressing my sexuality in a casual manner.

I have experienced being able to reflexively abstain from sugary beverages to aid in losing 12kg in 6 months.

I have experienced practice with a guitar that led to muscle memory and practical skills over intermittent sessions for several months.

I have experienced taking personal responsibility for lacking in the maintanence of my car and accepting the financial liabities I induced.

I have experienced compersion and a loss of feelings of FOMO. With genuine adoration for the marriage of a poly woman I have begun dating.

I have had a good time and feel as though I recognise a great deal of opportunities I have set myself up for, and I am grateful to the Sun. :sun:


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I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,797
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: sudly]
    #28336400 - 05/27/23 01:34 AM (7 months, 29 days ago)

So far, the worst thing I can do is open up new opportunities.


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I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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Invisibleredgreenvines
irregular verb
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Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 37,530
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: sudly]
    #28336438 - 05/27/23 02:27 AM (7 months, 29 days ago)

what has led you to this assessment?


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,797
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: redgreenvines]
    #28336482 - 05/27/23 03:53 AM (7 months, 29 days ago)

Verbal abuse today, but originally by deciding to move on from a 5 year relationship 6 months ago.


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I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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Invisibleredgreenvines
irregular verb
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Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 37,530
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: sudly]
    #28336516 - 05/27/23 05:07 AM (7 months, 29 days ago)

takes time to accommodate that stuff


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,797
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: redgreenvines]
    #28336542 - 05/27/23 05:47 AM (7 months, 29 days ago)

I was already adjusted and prepared for an aggressive response, but the exhibits are damning and don't require further words or my involvement.

I have a prepared statement and a Google drive.

And I ended things amicably, she's a great person, we just grew apart.

Today is professional, last year was personal.


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I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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Offlinetrekko
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Registered: 05/18/23
Posts: 38
Last seen: 6 months, 27 days
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: sudly] * 1
    #28336557 - 05/27/23 06:20 AM (7 months, 29 days ago)

I feel for ya man, some of the hardest things we can do is not just open up but open up to ourselves


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,797
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: redgreenvines]
    #28336695 - 05/27/23 09:14 AM (7 months, 29 days ago)

I have a proverbial bullet in the chamber for this case.

It makes my life harder and creates a lot more work for me not to do so.

I just have to walk through that door on Tuesday, read a few paragraphs, share a link, and walk away.

That's the easy part.

But do I dare take responsibility for observing a self induced pitfall?

I told them I wasn't putting my ass on the line for them.

That day the audit was abysmal.

I'm handing over the audit on Tuesday.

I can't imagine how someone could explain away the images of clear mismanagement.

1 was convincing. 30 will be jaw dropping.

It is jaw dropping.



I was giddy to hear he went home early. Over months I saw a trend, and hypothesised it would be self evident if true. It was, and is.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Edited by sudly (05/27/23 09:50 AM)


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,797
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: trekko]
    #28336729 - 05/27/23 09:44 AM (7 months, 29 days ago)

Quote:

trekko said:
I feel for ya man, some of the hardest things we can do is not just open up but open up to ourselves




People get defensive, and I think it is part of what makes communication one of the hardest things to do.

The fuck with me part is over. The find out part is on a collision course.

I haven't taken these steps before or felt like I had the independence to do so, but I do now.

P.S. I do recognise the difference between professional business chatter and casual talk in my language.

I don't know how this will roll out because the photos are a firework themselves. (They're garden management photos)

I don't want to spam music, but am sharing some songs I think can represent mindsets, moods and times of reminiscence.



If not for a representation of my own joy and solace. 


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I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Edited by sudly (05/27/23 12:22 PM)


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OfflineBrendanFlock
Stranger
Male

Registered: 06/01/13
Posts: 4,216
Last seen: 2 days, 13 hours
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: sudly]
    #28337749 - 05/28/23 02:39 AM (7 months, 28 days ago)

Line after line..

All complete!


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,797
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: sudly]
    #28347745 - 06/05/23 12:50 AM (7 months, 20 days ago)

Well, this weekend I explored some kink had a fantastic experience and some of the best communication and openness I've had so far.

Management was notified of the verbal abuse and the photos and say they have talked to the individuals responsible. Today I came across more blatant mismanagement and have taken another stock of photos and will continue to do so.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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Invisibleredgreenvines
irregular verb
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Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 37,530
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: sudly]
    #28347788 - 06/05/23 02:53 AM (7 months, 20 days ago)

???


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,797
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: redgreenvines]
    #28347796 - 06/05/23 03:16 AM (7 months, 20 days ago)

My communication skills have increased :tongue2:


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I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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OfflineBrendanFlock
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Male

Registered: 06/01/13
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Last seen: 2 days, 13 hours
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: sudly]
    #28347804 - 06/05/23 03:34 AM (7 months, 20 days ago)

188 communication sudly?

I guess it doesn't really have a cap..


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Invisibleredgreenvines
irregular verb
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Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 37,530
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: BrendanFlock]
    #28347807 - 06/05/23 03:44 AM (7 months, 20 days ago)

is this about expressing one's views?
what view is being expressed?


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,797
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: redgreenvines]
    #28347812 - 06/05/23 03:54 AM (7 months, 20 days ago)

That I wanna clap them cheeks.


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I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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Invisibleredgreenvines
irregular verb
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Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 37,530
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: sudly]
    #28347823 - 06/05/23 04:50 AM (7 months, 20 days ago)

rejoice! :fireworks:


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OnlineRJ Tubs 202
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Registered: 09/20/08
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Loc: USA Flag
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Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: sudly]
    #28348725 - 06/05/23 07:17 PM (7 months, 19 days ago)

Quote:

sudly said:

People get defensive, and I think it is part of what makes communication one of the hardest things to do.




Why do you think such a reaction makes communication more difficult?  I agree with you BTW.  I assume it's because it feels aggressive and sometimes invites an argument?

My son took debate class in school. I wonder if part of the lesson is to learn to be comfortable with defensive attitudes and arguments.  And not care too much about how people react to what you say.

When we say someone was "defensive" I guess it means they took our words to be a personal attack and they feel emotionally distressed.  Of course, sometimes people verbally attack others, so being "defensive" is sometimes normal and healthy.


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,797
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: RJ Tubs 202] * 1
    #28348761 - 06/05/23 07:49 PM (7 months, 19 days ago)

Quote:

RJ Tubs 202 said:
Quote:

sudly said:

People get defensive, and I think it is part of what makes communication one of the hardest things to do.




Why do you think such a reaction makes communication more difficult?  I agree with you BTW.  I assume it's because it feels aggressive and sometimes invites an argument?

My son took debate class in school. I wonder if part of the lesson is to learn to be comfortable with defensive attitudes and arguments.  And not care too much about how people react to what you say.

When we say someone was "defensive" I guess it means they took our words to be a personal attack and they feel emotionally distressed.  Of course, sometimes people verbally attack others, so being "defensive" is sometimes normal and healthy.




Because it can feel more confrontational when someone starts getting angry, irrate and generally uncommunicable.

Getting defensive of one's positions but staying calm can be okay, I think it's the associated aggression that makes such a defensive reaction negative. 

I think it's fine to have defensive attitudes and arguments for sure, but in person aggression and yelling can be a shaking experience.

Even to verbal abuse, I don't think reacting in kind is productive, at least in my experience last week I just said to the guy his feelings were valid and that I don't wish to talk outside of mediation. "It's okay if you feel that way, but I'm letting you know now, that I'm going to be looking to mediation".

Swearing continued, yadayada, we went our separate ways. The dude said a thousand times to others hed take responsibility for telling them to do the wrong thing, and when I said I didn't want to be involved and was taking before and after photos to save my own ass, he lost his shit :lol:


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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Invisibleredgreenvines
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Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 37,530
Re: Communication is one of the hardest things that you can do. [Re: sudly]
    #28349097 - 06/06/23 03:02 AM (7 months, 19 days ago)

It might be my fault that you are annoying these people.

sometimes I have antisocial concepts.

mind worms that can creep off the page and make forumites into weirdos


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