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Offlinewanderer5
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Registered: 04/13/23
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Last seen: 9 months, 4 days
First time psychedelic trip, 1 dry gram cubensis * 4
    #28278790 - 04/15/23 11:04 AM (9 months, 9 days ago)

I'm a middle-aged person who never did any drugs when I was younger and very  rarely drank. I have severe long-term depression that is resistant to treatment. I've looked into new therapies (trans cranial magnetic stimulation, ketamine) that I can't get qualified for without subjecting myself to many long-term rounds of Big Pharma drugs (which I very much hate, and have sworn off the antidepressants I used to take). So I decided to go this route - growing my own magic mushrooms.

I got just a first little flush of shrooms in vitro and the cakes don't seem to be growing anything in the FC yet, so I don't know if there will be more. What I had just happened to come out to exactly one dry gram.

I was pretty nervous last night while preparing my shroom tea, wondering if I'd have to go to the emergency room from ingesting mold that my inexperienced self couldn't recognize, and then get in trouble with the law. I would certainly rather have done something safer if anything like that were available to me, but it's not!  I knew my dose was pretty low so I wasn't overly concerned about a bad trip happening, but I still had that fear in my mind too.

I got lucky and nothing negative whatsoever happened. The effects came on gradually enough that at first I wasn't sure if I was just imagining it. First my limbs felt "relaxed" even though I was still tense and keyed up. The sensation in my extremities felt muted, and that felt basically pleasant. As the effects intensified, they did so in a way that was "mellow" and not harsh. It was similar to being drunk, but without the dizziness and drowsiness.

It was nice to have a taste of what it's like to be a much more positive and happy person! I feel like I haven't laughed so much in ten years. Recently I have started taking Delta 8 to help with my insomnia, but also once took a Delta 9 and had scary physical sensations in my brain and heart, so that coupled with paranoia, making me think I was having a stroke and a heart attack at the same time. The mushroom was so thankfully not like that at all! Also in contrast with Delta 8 and Delta 9 (THC), I never lost my train of thought or felt time distortions and second-to-second memory loss.

One thing I loved the most about that trip was getting the impression that inanimate objects were communicating in a friendly manner, a couple of times. Nothing overtly hallucinatory, just a distinct impression that is subtle enough not to be frightening or overwhelming. Some of this is me being suggestible from stuff I've read or heard in the media, but the first sense of this was the feeling that the mushroom was communicating to me that it knew I had been scared but wanted me to know that it was friendly and had good intentions. Looking back, I now think I also had the impression that it was enjoying seeing me happy and was sharing my amusement in all the things that I was laughing about.

Several years back I had similar magical feelings that were brought on by meditation practice, which were just a bit more subtle and occasional but also miraculously lifted my depression. It lasted for like a year and a half. The only problem was that it faded away and I could never recapture it again no matter how much I meditated.

Last night during this trip, I stared at the towel hanging on the rack while I went to use the toilet. The towel looked very interesting and beautiful and it shifted and undulated in a psychedelic way. When I first noticed this I had the impression that the towel "wanted to show me what it could do." This visual experience was also very familiar to me from when I used to meditate so it barely even seemed out of the ordinary to me. The towel ended up being the most interesting thing I viewed all night. It was better than the night sky, which seemed boring. The towel could look like it had an intricate neon green lacy-patterned overlay, and then it would just change moment to moment. The towel even seemed to change colors as well as patterns. The fibers looked like they were doing a dance. I could make it go back to normal by blinking and I would have to stare for a few seconds to see the show. It wasn't just what it looked like, but how I felt about it. My joy and wonder and fascination with it was better than the visuals alone. If I saw the same lovely illusion while not-high, I probably would feel nothing about it.

Another thing I noticed was all the shadows in the room. I thought they looked different, and I would stare to try to figure out what was different about them, but nothing really was. They just stood out more. I kept saying "Wow, there are a lot of shadows in this room! Wow, look at those!" I also thought that the pattern of the floor looked different, but I couldn't tell what was different, it just drew my attention. Again I had the feeling that the shadows and the floor pattern wanted to show themselves off to me, not that I was noticing them, but that THEY wanted to show themselves to me. Occasionally the contrast between various objects (the edges) seemed to double up or change color, very similar to those "Magic Eye" pictures, but when I tried to focus on them they went back to normal.

I just absolutely loved laughing so much and feeling so happy, and I went through like half a box of Kleenex trying to wipe my tears and blow my nose because I was laughing my ass off. Nothing unpleasant! 

I really didn't want it to end and felt sad when I eventually realized I should go to bed. I felt sad to discard my shroom dregs. I had to take a shower before I went to bed because I STANK!!! I had taken a shower that morning but oh my GOD, my body stank, I guess I must have been sweating a lot. Then I went to bed and slept really well and I felt happy while I was sleeping. I had to get up to pee but was able to fall back asleep (this matters because I have chronic insomnia and often can't get back to sleep after waking in the middle of the night).  This morning I do have a headache but it's not terrible.

Thank you for reading my first trip report!


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OfflineNeurotech
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Registered: 05/05/20
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Re: First time psychedelic trip, 1 dry gram cubensis [Re: wanderer5]
    #28281930 - 04/17/23 10:55 AM (9 months, 7 days ago)

Nice to hear about your positive experience. Let us know if the improved mood has maintained?


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Offlinewanderer5
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Registered: 04/13/23
Posts: 19
Last seen: 9 months, 4 days
Re: First time psychedelic trip, 1 dry gram cubensis [Re: Neurotech]
    #28286020 - 04/19/23 08:26 PM (9 months, 4 days ago)

I think it did have a positive effect on my mood in the days since. Not dramatic, but noticeable. :smile:


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InvisibleMycodemus
wrong way down a one way street
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Registered: 01/27/23
Posts: 416
Re: First time psychedelic trip, 1 dry gram cubensis [Re: wanderer5]
    #28286438 - 04/20/23 07:15 AM (9 months, 4 days ago)

Sounds like you had a lovely time. I especially loved this part:

“ One thing I loved the most about that trip was getting the impression that inanimate objects were communicating in a friendly manner, a couple of times. Nothing overtly hallucinatory, just a distinct impression that is subtle enough not to be frightening or overwhelming. Some of this is me being suggestible from stuff I've read or heard in the media, but the first sense of this was the feeling that the mushroom was communicating to me that it knew I had been scared but wanted me to know that it was friendly and had good intentions. Looking back, I now think I also had the impression that it was enjoying seeing me happy and was sharing my amusement in all the things that I was laughing about.”

I’m a bit of a hippie when it comes to nature and I hope that my mushrooms will communicate with me like this as I’ve nurtured them from spores and hoped for them to grow strong and healthy. It would be nice to been “seen” in this way by them, it sounds lovely.

I hope you find what you need from them, I’m rooting for you :smile:


--------------------


An hour and a half later, I was beginning to feel definite effects


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Offlinesivaddavis
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Registered: 03/04/23
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Last seen: 7 months, 9 days
Re: First time psychedelic trip, 1 dry gram cubensis [Re: Mycodemus]
    #28294058 - 04/25/23 12:05 AM (8 months, 30 days ago)

Thanks so much for your post wanderer5!

I am a similar age to you and on the brink of my first psilocybin experience. The experience you have described sounds wonderfully beneficial and gives me confidence to take the first step on this path!

Really appreciate your openness and honesty👍🏻


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OfflineSeventhMushroom
just a tiny agar pin


Registered: 12/30/22
Posts: 55
Last seen: 2 days, 1 hour
Re: First time psychedelic trip, 1 dry gram cubensis [Re: wanderer5]
    #28295630 - 04/26/23 02:33 AM (8 months, 29 days ago)

Quote:

wanderer5 said:
I'm a middle-aged person who never did any drugs when I was younger and very  rarely drank. I have severe long-term depression that is resistant to treatment. I've looked into new therapies (trans cranial magnetic stimulation, ketamine) that I can't get qualified for without subjecting myself to many long-term rounds of Big Pharma drugs (which I very much hate, and have sworn off the antidepressants I used to take). So I decided to go this route - growing my own magic mushrooms.





I feel you man!
option 1) several years of coping with depression on various pills, plus many thousands of dollars of doctor bills and med bills, with a statistically low chance of success
option 2) a few months, a hundred bucks in supplies, and a bit of care and attention, with a decent?(anecdotal evidence) chance of success?

I've tried both options, I can say with certainty, option 1 sucks balls. welcome to option 2!


--------------------
LAGM 2024


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OfflineShromolo
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Registered: 01/25/23
Posts: 111
Loc: Viking land
Last seen: 1 day, 58 minutes
Re: First time psychedelic trip, 1 dry gram cubensis [Re: SeventhMushroom]
    #28300536 - 04/30/23 12:03 AM (8 months, 25 days ago)

Thank you for sharing you experience, and I'm really happy it was such a nice experience!


--------------------
Understanding is enlightening, always be open to fresh input and diversity! Be a better man respect others as you would like to be respected.


"The greatest journey of exploration is to understand our own minds. #Exploration #Understanding #Mind


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Invisibleredgreenvines
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Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 37,528
Re: First time psychedelic trip, 1 dry gram cubensis [Re: wanderer5]
    #28300663 - 04/30/23 04:52 AM (8 months, 25 days ago)

at 1 gram you could probably go again (if you have the shrooms) every weekend if you wanted to revisit what the towel's shadows are up to, which is a great think to fondly remember.


--------------------
:confused: _ :brainfart:🧠  _ :finger:


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