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Anonymous #1
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Friends with Benefits, do I dare? 1
#28277668 - 04/14/23 03:53 PM (9 months, 10 days ago) |
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Yesterday someone messaged me, and we were talking and they asked if I would be interested in friends with benefits. I have never had a friend with benefits. I have always been married or I was dating. And I have always been more attracted to a persons personality and intelligence before physical appearance. I am not attracted to him. He is cool and all. We live different lives, he is wilder than I am. And I don't find him attractive. BUT I would like some sex... LOL That sounds awful, I am aware. I don't want sex, I want good, satisfying sex. I am.... confused. I don't know if I could do it.. even though my hormones are dying for it
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pslyke
fantasmagoric



Registered: 06/12/10
Posts: 4,098
Loc:
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #1] 1
#28277770 - 04/14/23 05:22 PM (9 months, 10 days ago) |
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It doesn't sound awful it sounds tittilating.
In this case, orgasm may bring clarity.
You know that saying about going out with a loaded gun... It's always easier to make good decisions about the sanity of engaging with a new sexual partner if you don't have an extreme level of pent up sexual frustration.
-------------------- "What appears impenetrable to us does exist, manifesting itself in the deepest wisdom and the most radiant beauty" Einstein "The conservatives of 70 years ago would be outraged at what has come to pass. It embodies everything they took up arms for to defeat"Asante
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oursoulsinmotion
๐ต๐๐๐


Registered: 10/04/21
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #1] 1
#28277849 - 04/14/23 06:20 PM (9 months, 10 days ago) |
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YOLO try it !
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Kryptos
Stranger

Registered: 11/01/14
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No offense OP, but I have the distinct feeling that if you do go through with it, it will be mediocre sex at best and you'll need to finish yourself off.
Not saying that's a bad outcome, just something to prepare for.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Kryptos]
#28278017 - 04/14/23 08:30 PM (9 months, 9 days ago) |
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He is my next door neighbor. He and his daughter came over tonight. I'm just not super attracted to him. But I'm not disgusted. He has bad teeth which grosses me out. I started considering it when he said were both older and both have needs. I'm all but fucking the couch lately, im super busy, I have little no free time. I hate being no sexual After awhile i stop feeling like a woman I HATE it
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Anonymous #2
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28278358 - 04/15/23 04:54 AM (9 months, 9 days ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: Yesterday someone messaged me, and we were talking and they asked if I would be interested in friends with benefits. I have never had a friend with benefits. I have always been married or I was dating. And I have always been more attracted to a persons personality and intelligence before physical appearance. I am not attracted to him. He is cool and all. We live different lives, he is wilder than I am. And I don't find him attractive. BUT I would like some sex... LOL That sounds awful, I am aware. I don't want sex, I want good, satisfying sex. I am.... confused. I don't know if I could do it.. even though my hormones are dying for it
Are you the person who posted about how to find a lover a couple months ago? You are, aren't you? Anyway. Do it. Actually, caveat. Bring up drugs. And if he's still down THEN do it.
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oursoulsinmotion
๐ต๐๐๐


Registered: 10/04/21
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28278370 - 04/15/23 05:02 AM (9 months, 9 days ago) |
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If yr already sketched out then id say its a no go Tell him yu already have a few side dudes but thanks anyways (In this situation yr in its Ok to lie if yu feel weirded out by his asking))
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Anonymous #3
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28278439 - 04/15/23 06:08 AM (9 months, 9 days ago) |
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Let me put it this way. Do you think you could have an orgasm with him despite your problems with his appearance? Would the sex still be worth it without an orgasm?
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oursoulsinmotion
๐ต๐๐๐


Registered: 10/04/21
Posts: 3,384
Last seen: 6 minutes, 52 seconds
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28278467 - 04/15/23 06:42 AM (9 months, 9 days ago) |
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BLUE Anything is sooo unsafe Dont do itt He sounds like 1 of those old dudes tht doesnt wear rubbers๐คฎ๐คข
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #3]
#28278961 - 04/15/23 01:02 PM (9 months, 9 days ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous #3 said: Let me put it this way. Do you think you could have an orgasm with him despite your problems with his appearance? Would the sex still be worth it without an orgasm?
If there was no orgasm... not worth it. I have no desire to have sex without an orgasm.
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Anonymous #1
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Quote:
oursoulsinmotion said: BLUE Anything is sooo unsafe Dont do itt He sounds like 1 of those old dudes tht doesnt wear rubbers๐คฎ๐คข
Hes not old, but he looks older than me. But he lives a harder life than I have lived.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #2]
#28278966 - 04/15/23 01:03 PM (9 months, 9 days ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous #2 said:
Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: Yesterday someone messaged me, and we were talking and they asked if I would be interested in friends with benefits. I have never had a friend with benefits. I have always been married or I was dating. And I have always been more attracted to a persons personality and intelligence before physical appearance. I am not attracted to him. He is cool and all. We live different lives, he is wilder than I am. And I don't find him attractive. BUT I would like some sex... LOL That sounds awful, I am aware. I don't want sex, I want good, satisfying sex. I am.... confused. I don't know if I could do it.. even though my hormones are dying for it
Are you the person who posted about how to find a lover a couple months ago? You are, aren't you? Anyway. Do it. Actually, caveat. Bring up drugs. And if he's still down THEN do it.
yes I am
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lifeiswhatyoumake
Trance in my sig n blood



Registered: 09/30/11
Posts: 16,711
Last seen: 2 hours, 42 minutes
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #1] 1
#28279144 - 04/15/23 03:30 PM (9 months, 9 days ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said:He has bad teeth which grosses me out.
That would be a deal breaker for me. I can't kiss someone who has bad teeth. "Bad" meaning unhealthy. I don't care if they're just crooked, as long as they're healthy.
--------------------
  I dropped a trance track "Peace Love & Trance": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M4uQBM-mRYUย ;   
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oursoulsinmotion
๐ต๐๐๐



Registered: 10/04/21
Posts: 3,384
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28281738 - 04/17/23 08:24 AM (9 months, 7 days ago) |
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Yea bad teeth& toe nail fungus Major turn off๐คฎ๐คฎ
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28282070 - 04/17/23 01:10 PM (9 months, 7 days ago) |
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meth mouth I am assuming
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Anonymous #2
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28282452 - 04/17/23 05:14 PM (9 months, 7 days ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said:
Quote:
Anonymous #2 said:
Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: Yesterday someone messaged me, and we were talking and they asked if I would be interested in friends with benefits. I have never had a friend with benefits. I have always been married or I was dating. And I have always been more attracted to a persons personality and intelligence before physical appearance. I am not attracted to him. He is cool and all. We live different lives, he is wilder than I am. And I don't find him attractive. BUT I would like some sex... LOL That sounds awful, I am aware. I don't want sex, I want good, satisfying sex. I am.... confused. I don't know if I could do it.. even though my hormones are dying for it
Are you the person who posted about how to find a lover a couple months ago? You are, aren't you? Anyway. Do it. Actually, caveat. Bring up drugs. And if he's still down THEN do it.
yes I am
Honestly give it a go. I feel like you're looking for reasons not to do it than reason to do it. Which means you kinda want it more than you don't.
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sudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,798
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #1] 2
#28282935 - 04/17/23 11:45 PM (9 months, 6 days ago) |
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Yeah fwb is good. I've been single 4 months now and figured I just wanted something casual. I was open about it and met a cool lady who's fun and I don't have to be commited to.
I think it can be hard though because it's taken me a while to be able to come to terms with jealousy and handling it but I think that now I find it easier to reconcile my jealousy if there's any rather quickly with my personal independence.
I like being independent right now and jealousy doesn't serve any beneficial purposes in that. I think I really realised it when I was shown her tiktok with her other partners and I didn't feel jealousy.
I felt a bit surprised seeing it, and it took a moment to sink in, but it wasn't jealousy, I was just content to see them happy and to be happy myself too.
I think it comes down to what you want, do you want a friend that is genuine and you can hang out with without only having sex, or do you just want a fuck buddy to call over for some cheek clapping only to see them out the door afterwards.
I can be rather affectionate but I can also recognise a separation between sex and emotions. Which is a point that has taken a lot of life experience to come to.
Honestly I didn't know about my own hard and soft boundaries until recently and how important enthustic consent is with effective communication regarding my sexuality. Also that I'm open to being with a transman who's feminine enough. I haven't met anyone like that yet but the idea doesn't rub me the wrong way.
-------------------- I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.
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LogicaL Chaos
Ascension Energy & Alien UFOs




Registered: 05/12/07
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28283060 - 04/18/23 02:06 AM (9 months, 6 days ago) |
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Thats a tough one because for me at least, physical attraction is really important for like a ongoing sexual experience.
But Ive known some women who are really "open-minded" about who they find attractive. For them, I am thankful ๐
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maudeads
Stranger
Registered: 04/18/23
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: LogicaL Chaos] 1
#28283102 - 04/18/23 03:38 AM (9 months, 6 days ago) |
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I don't see anything wrong with that. People choose who they are for each other, don't they?
Edited by maudeads (04/20/23 03:52 AM)
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sudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,798
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Re: Friends with Benefits, do I dare? [Re: maudeads]
#28283105 - 04/18/23 03:40 AM (9 months, 6 days ago) |
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If someone isn't attracted to someone they want to sleep with.. then is that want to sleep with them not reducable to wanting any form of sexual relation or intimacy?
-------------------- I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.
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