|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Warrk]
#28220015 - 03/08/23 03:01 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Warrk said: Looking back to your first post OP, quitting weed and psychedelics is a good move and admirable for 2 reasons I can think of.
Firstly, it shows that you are serious about making changes to save your marriage and that you are directly addressing what your wife is concerned about.
Second, I believe life is better without weed. Sure, weed is a nice thing to have now and then but when it becomes a regular thing and a habit then it cannot be a good thing. THC has a negative effect on the heart however you consume it - whether you smoke it or vape it or eat it does not matter. If you want to be there for your kids and see them good up you are have a better chance doing it without weed.
Again, I hope it works out for you and that your wife is willing to give the marriage a second chance.
Thanks again Warrk. Reading this is encouraging. I don't need the weed, there was literally no difference for me quitting these few days so far. Only that I don't find watching a show in the evenings appealing anymore and that I rather go to bed instead. I am close to 40 now and started using cannabis early. The first time I smoked when I was 13 and accept for a hiatus of 4 years I pretty much enjoyed it everyday. I preferred vaping. Anyways I am more than willing to call that use a thing of the past if it would change anything. The moment I held my daughter for the first time things have changed. I was no longer the center of importance to myself, my daughter was. And now it's both children. I would do everything for them. I guess most parents feel that way. Or they should.
Now after reading my last post you'll see it's going to be a bit tricky. I don't want to and can't give up though.
|
LogicaL Chaos
Ascension Energy & Alien UFOs




Registered: 05/12/07
Posts: 69,310
Loc: The Inexpressible...
Last seen: 4 hours, 38 minutes
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28220023 - 03/08/23 03:16 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
Damn, this whole situation does not sound good. Sounds like your wife is turning into someone you will not appreciate or respect in terms of the whole Bible faith and conspiracy theories aspect.
Many marriages end because of differences in religious or political values between the partners. It sounds like this is happening in your marriage. I dont have any advice sadly....
-------------------- "What you must understand is that your physical dimension affects everyone in the higher dimensions as well. All things are interconnected. All things are One. Therefore, if one dimension is broken or out of balance, then all other dimensions will experience repercussions." - Pleiadian Prophecy 2020 The New Golden Age by James Carwin PROJECT BLUE BOOK ANALYSIS! (312 pages!) | Psychedelics & UFOs | Ready to Contact UFOs? | The Source on Mushrooms | Trippy Gematrix | Dj TeknoLogical | Fentanyl Test Kits R.I.P. Big Worm || The Start of the Ascension Process was 2020. Welcome to the Next Great Era of Earth 🌎🌍🌏
  Oregon Eclipse Festival 2017 :: Aug 19th - 21st :: Pure Paradise   Very Effective LSA Extraction Tek | 💧 Advanced Cold Water LSA Extraction Method 💧 |  Mescajuana - Mescaline with Marijuana | DMT Dab Bongs | UFO Technology! Shpongle
     
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: LogicaL Chaos]
#28220028 - 03/08/23 03:37 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
Thanks for your input Logical. I know, it also doesn't feel good. Like a damocles sword hanging above my head, just waiting to fall. It feels like this any and every second, even if I try to shift my focus on my children. Just writing these thoughts I have, helps a bit though. I haven't told anyone about this, not my family overseas (who are so happy and excited to welcome the whole family soon) and not to the few old friends I still got over there. I feel pretty much alone with this. I am thankful for having at least the option to be heard here on the shroomery.
I have a glimpse of hope though. She often mentions that some of the things this organization is about are too far out there even for her. That tells me that there might be some hope. I hope that's not just wishful thinking.
Today I had my video job interview. If I should be successful there's no obstacle for the move anymore. Maybe the new environment will change her views and she can focus on what's really important (in my opinion) again. On our family.
Edited by Anonymous (03/08/23 03:40 AM)
|
Warrk



Registered: 06/02/17
Posts: 1,623
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Anonymous #1] 1
#28220046 - 03/08/23 04:14 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
OP I think the reason why your wife got into this group is because of her feeling like there was something missing from her life. People will grab onto anything that gives them a sense of belonging. Cults operate like this and today there are many spiritual mumbo-jumbo groups that are of a similar vein.
Here's the thing though. If beliefs remain only beliefs and there is no harm done to others and there are no expensive membership fees to pay, then maybe this group that your wife has connected to is not so bad. There are many conservative fundamentalist Christians who are good people for example, likewise many Hindus and Muslims and people of other faiths and religions who are outstanding members of society and who treat everyone equally.
Marriage often causes husbands to become a little bit negligent and to take their wives for granted I think it is fair to say. Women need constant pampering and communication is so important to them - connecting on a deeper level is what they want. If you can fill this void I am sure there will be no need for any group or religion or anything else to occupy your wife's mind.
Now, it could also be that over time you guys have drifted apart and there is too much of a gap to bridge no matter how much effort you put in. It could be that you don't actually like her anymore and what she has become. There are many options available and it isn't just staying in the marriage or getting divorced. I know a couple who still live together even though they are no longer romantically linked just because divorce is too expensive and problematic and no-one wins if divorce were to go ahead, they also have kids that they share so they have decided to unlink romantically but otherwise life goes on as it did before!
I would continue to keep the lines of communication open with your wife, always be calm and non-judgemental when talking, kindness and compassion for yourself and your wife will help things along. Get things off your chest and likewise get her to upload all her burdens so there are no secrets and no misgivings and resentments festering inside... everything has to be out in the open but do it in a measured way so it doesn't cause hurt. Doing this can be fun and might allow you to connect in a way you have never before. Good luck bro!
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Warrk]
#28220104 - 03/08/23 05:44 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Warrk said: OP I think the reason why your wife got into this group is because of her feeling like there was something missing from her life. People will grab onto anything that gives them a sense of belonging. Cults operate like this and today there are many spiritual mumbo-jumbo groups that are of a similar vein.
I think you are absolutely right. And I would be fine with her following these people if she would keep it to herself. Just like I decided to keep my stuff for myself. The thing is I don't like it if my children get involved and basically indoctrinated. I also don't like the feeling of her looking down at me everytime I try to explain myself. My idea of things. That doesn't feel fair. By now I get a lot of passive aggressive reactions, which is probably because I have been very passionate about my standpoint initially. I have changed that though and I got quite good at remaining calm and rational. In that sense she even helped me to grow. However she likes to compartmentalize things and put me into a box which I seem to be locked in.
I concider myself being a kind person unless you really piss me off. I like to raise my children with compassion and try to make the feel understood if they are unhappy. I feel that way I am strengthening the bond between me and the children and that in turn will pay out later in life when they are becoming teenagers. I want them to have the feeling that they can always come to me to talk about their issues instead of keeping their worries for themselves. My wife was the same. Now when one of the children cries, because they feel treated unfairly or don't understand she says "suck it up sunshine". I don't see any benefit in saying something like that to a 2 or 5 year old child.
I definitely keep on communicating with her though. Anything else would cause the opposite of what I try to achieve.
|
RJ Tubs 202



Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,010
Loc: USA
Last seen: 1 day, 5 hours
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Warrk]
#28220185 - 03/08/23 06:47 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Warrk said:
Now, it could also be that over time you guys have drifted apart and there is too much of a gap to bridge no matter how much effort you put in. It could be that you don't actually like her anymore and what she has become. There are many options available and it isn't just staying in the marriage or getting divorced. I know a couple who still live together even though they are no longer romantically linked just because divorce is too expensive and problematic and no-one wins if divorce were to go ahead, they also have kids that they share so they have decided to unlink romantically but otherwise life goes on as it did before!

People change over time, and this is something we don't seriously consider when we sign the contract to stay together "forever". And of course, we never know HOW someone will change! We promise to stay together for "better or worse". Imagine making that promise to an employer when you are 25 or 30! I will never ever quit, no matter what! I have some problems with the institution of marriage.
I was never really interested in my ex sexually. That became a problem over the years. We did briefly discuss the option of continuing to live together (to raise our son) without engaging in physical intimacy. Over the years she became somewhat of a hoarder, and that was a big problem for me. People change.
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
#28220321 - 03/08/23 08:22 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
I totally get that too. It's kind of funny, because I myself as a child of divorced parents was having my problems with the idea of the institution of marriage and actually never planned to get married. My wife found it to be important though, so we went ahead and got married. Before we made this contract of which I forgot the name of (antinaptual?).
Fun fact is that we explicitly looked for a non religious marriage counsellor and didn't get married in church, in a very small circle of her, I, my brothers her mother and my parents.
I never was under the illusion that each of us wouldn't change or that the feelings will change, but I never thought such a drastic change would be possible.
That being said, I am trying to not fall into the patterns of communication that we established over the last few years without realizing. And the main issues are being confrontational and passive aggressive towards each other mainly. We are just turning in circles. I think communication (or rather miscommunication) is really our issue.
I feel I just had a good talk with her and we agreed on the communication issues which I hope is a good start. We set up some rules to avoid falling into these patterns. It's maybe wishful thinking, but I don't want to give up.
|
Lost at Sea
Time Traveler

Registered: 03/06/23
Posts: 52
Loc: TBD
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Anonymous #1] 1
#28220326 - 03/08/23 08:25 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
Hang in there man and don't be sorry for sharing. It takes courage and is wise to get input; things are hard to see from one perspective, and it helps to process what's going on by sharing.
Its great you two can still talk. Even when she laughs or doesn't give an answer right away it means a lot for you two to give patience and kindness while you sort through each of your needs, expectations, and desires for one another
In regards to the religion, life is a journey of learning, questioning, and making choices. It sounds like she's trying something new and its pretty important to her, especially since shes sharing it with your kids. Have you asked her why she is so interested in it or whats so special about Christianity to her? Its fine to question but open your heart and mind to what she's saying, so you can hear and understand your wifes heart. All the trips you've taken have lead to this moment of divine connection and understanding needed to heal and move forward together right now.
Its easy and natural to get defensive but when we surrender and push past that amazing things can happen. Keep asking questions like you are and listening, shes has a lot to say for some time and hasn't. You all are doing great seeking counseling. Just give yourselves time and love to navigate through this time. There's definitely hope though it might be hard to see.
-------------------- ...Rome wasn't built in a day, but burning it down only took a few...
 "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love. We love Him because He first loved us."
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28220328 - 03/08/23 08:27 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
Just out of curiosity RJ, do you feel your son got over you and your ex wifes divorce in a semi good way? Or did it result in issues? (I would understand if you wouldn't want to get into that)
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28220334 - 03/08/23 08:30 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
Lost at sea, thanks I will get back to you soon. It's dinner time here and I am the cook.
For now I want to say welcome to the shroomery. I kind of feel honored that you dedicated your first post to this.
|
RJ Tubs 202



Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,010
Loc: USA
Last seen: 1 day, 5 hours
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Anonymous #1] 1
#28220350 - 03/08/23 08:38 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
I've not read up about goods techniques to address the hostility of passive aggressive behavior. "The Angry Book" by Theodore Rubin is fantastic and has helped me a lot. We often repress anger, and over time it builds up and then can turn into perverted and distorted anger which is poisonous to a relationship.
That can fuel anxiety, depression, insomnia, eating disorders, drug abuse, etc
|
RJ Tubs 202



Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,010
Loc: USA
Last seen: 1 day, 5 hours
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28220360 - 03/08/23 08:47 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Anonymous #1 said:
Just out of curiosity RJ, do you feel your son got over you and your ex wifes divorce in a semi good way? Or did it result in issues? (I would understand if you wouldn't want to get into that)
I feel he is OK and we have a good relationship. We go on adventures to the beach, zoo, and love to browse bookstores. We spent a week in Italy last September to celebrate his graduating high school. He has a wide variety of interests and has friends. He had OCD and autistic traits when he was younger, which he mostly grew out of. But the damn pandemic has been very hard on him (and all of us!!!) and some OCD symptoms have returned.
|
Lost at Sea
Time Traveler

Registered: 03/06/23
Posts: 52
Loc: TBD
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28220371 - 03/08/23 08:51 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
Thank you for the welcome to the Shroomery! I'm grateful to be a part of this community.
-------------------- ...Rome wasn't built in a day, but burning it down only took a few...
 "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love. We love Him because He first loved us."
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Lost at Sea]
#28220604 - 03/08/23 11:32 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Lost at Sea said: Hang in there man and don't be sorry for sharing. It takes courage and is wise to get input; things are hard to see from one perspective, and it helps to process what's going on by sharing.
Its great you two can still talk. Even when she laughs or doesn't give an answer right away it means a lot for you two to give patience and kindness while you sort through each of your needs, expectations, and desires for one another
In regards to the religion, life is a journey of learning, questioning, and making choices. It sounds like she's trying something new and its pretty important to her, especially since shes sharing it with your kids. Have you asked her why she is so interested in it or whats so special about Christianity to her? Its fine to question but open your heart and mind to what she's saying, so you can hear and understand your wifes heart. All the trips you've taken have lead to this moment of divine connection and understanding needed to heal and move forward together right now.
Its easy and natural to get defensive but when we surrender and push past that amazing things can happen. Keep asking questions like you are and listening, shes has a lot to say for some time and hasn't. You all are doing great seeking counseling. Just give yourselves time and love to navigate through this time. There's definitely hope though it might be hard to see.
It has been definitely hard to see any hope in this. I have been oblivious to the problem and it hit me pretty hard, when I realized that it might be too late for us, or that it's too late for me to do something to improve the situation for her.
I did ask her why she got back into religion (she used to be religious as a child). She says it helps her to cope with everything she went through the last years and what she still goes through. Her work is quite stressful as she's teaching special needs children with autism. I know I couldn't do that. The thing is, she feels I didn't care about the things she has to endure every day, which isn't true. I care and thought of ways to make it easier for her. At the same time I might have been able to do more or to make it more visible for her that I do care. I was stuck in a bubble at home and pretty much isolated myself, which didn't improve the situation. This of course isn't supposed to be an excuse.
For now I will start to genuinely listen and understand whatever is bothering her. I think this has been missing or neglected by me without even realizing.
I am glad that I dared to share this here, even though I stayed anonymous. Some might have an idea who I am and that's perfectly fine. It helped a great deal I got a lot of input, other perspectives and ideas. And I feel someone listened. Thanks guys. One thing is for sure. No matter if my last trip has been the last one or not, I will continue to stay a part of this community.
So for now I will stay clear of tripping. I did my fair share, seen and learned a lot of incredible things, but reached a point where I think it's time to take a long break and focus on my family. There's still plenty of time for psychedelic explorations later in life if I should feel that it's a good idea one day.
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
#28220613 - 03/08/23 11:42 AM (10 months, 16 days ago) |
|
|
Quote:
RJ Tubs 202 said: I've not read up about goods techniques to address the hostility of passive aggressive behavior. "The Angry Book" by Theodore Rubin is fantastic and has helped me a lot. We often repress anger, and over time it builds up and then can turn into perverted and distorted anger which is poisonous to a relationship.
That can fuel anxiety, depression, insomnia, eating disorders, drug abuse, etc
Thanks for suggesting the book! I will look into it, as I feel more like taking up reading than passively watching something on TV now anyways. So this might be a good opportunity to get back into reading. I used to read a lot in my younger years.
Quote:
RJ Tubs 202 said:
Quote:
Anonymous #1 said:
Just out of curiosity RJ, do you feel your son got over you and your ex wifes divorce in a semi good way? Or did it result in issues? (I would understand if you wouldn't want to get into that)
I feel he is OK and we have a good relationship. We go on adventures to the beach, zoo, and love to browse bookstores. We spent a week in Italy last September to celebrate his graduating high school. He has a wide variety of interests and has friends. He had OCD and autistic traits when he was younger, which he mostly grew out of. But the damn pandemic has been very hard on him (and all of us!!!) and some OCD symptoms have returned.
I am happy to read that. It sounds like you two have a healthy father/son relationship which isn't a matter of course. Yeah you're right, I feel the pandemic has caused so much pain and suffering. It needs a long time to heal. I hope your son will overcome the OCD. It seems like he has a good father that will support him on his way!
|
RJ Tubs 202



Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,010
Loc: USA
Last seen: 1 day, 5 hours
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Anonymous #1]
#28222040 - 03/09/23 10:03 AM (10 months, 15 days ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Anonymous #1 said:
. . . she feels I didn't care about the things she has to endure every day, which isn't true. I care and thought of ways to make it easier for her. At the same time I might have been able to do more or to make it more visible for her that I do care.
Beyond listening to her, I wonder what else she wants from you. It appears she desires more than listening. She seems to want more support, but what kind of support? I wonder if she can tell you exactly what she needs. Sometimes in relationships we expect too much of our partner. We can grow to expect that our partner should always know what we need. Humans are far too complex to ever master the art of mind reading.
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: RJ Tubs 202] 1
#28222118 - 03/09/23 11:29 AM (10 months, 15 days ago) |
|
|
Quote:
RJ Tubs 202 said:
Quote:
Anonymous #1 said:
. . . she feels I didn't care about the things she has to endure every day, which isn't true. I care and thought of ways to make it easier for her. At the same time I might have been able to do more or to make it more visible for her that I do care.
Beyond listening to her, I wonder what else she wants from you. It appears she desires more than listening. She seems to want more support, but what kind of support? I wonder if she can tell you exactly what she needs. Sometimes in relationships we expect too much of our partner. We can grow to expect that our partner should always know what we need. Humans are far too complex to ever master the art of mind reading.
You are onto something and I start to figure things out, I hope. I got the same suspicion.
Further up I mentioned that we met on NIN.com. Back then I really liked listening to them as they helped me to overcome a depressed phase of my life. We talked via pm for about two years and had never imagined that we would meet one day and that the chemistry was right. Anyway, today I listened to the song called "ring finger" as I felt that it fits in some ways or represents some of the things she said to me about a week ago.
"If I would be twice the man I could be, I'd be half of what you need." - This line really hit the spot.
I think it all escalated to this point because initially I put in more effort into our relationship and at some point the routine took over, which I thought was a normal thing. So I get the suspicion that her acting the way she did was because she expected something from me that I thought she doesn't care about anymore, just like you said.
I tried something for the last few days and it really seems to improve things. In the beginning of our marriage I would do all these small things that show that I care. Like giving her a hug and a kiss whenever she or I leave for work. Asking her if I should prepare a cup of coffee before she comes home. Asking her about her day, etc. All these things that might seem like a matter of course to some, but things that slowly vanished from our daily routine, partially because I got lazy and partially because she seemed to get annoyed with all the lovey dovey stuff at some point.
She expects a lot though. It seems like the less I did these things, the more she expected from me, till it was impossible for me to fullfil her expectations anymore.
Here's an example. Currently I renovate the kitchen. The plan is to rent out the house when we're overseas and the kitchen really suffered, because the kids like to play with stuff and sometimes things break. I got three tools available and all of them are old. Working with them takes effort and time. I re-use old wood whenever I can to save money, sand it down, cut it into pieces, etc. That takes time and I need to do all the other chores on the side. Additionally I live in a country where we experience daily power outages, sometimes 4 hours at a time. Long story short, it takes some time to get the job done. I am happy with the results though and was looking forward to see her reaction when she came home only to hear "This is taking too long." To which I reply "I do the best I can." Her response was "Then doing your best is not good enough." When she said that she seemed so bitter and sour. You can imagine what that did to my self confidence.
But by now I think it wasn't the actual reason why she acted like that. I got plenty of time. I take my time and do things properly if the situation allows it.
So anyway, I decided that being confrontational will not lead to the desired outcome. It would only result in her getting even more defensive. I started to revive the old rituals. I give her a hug and a kiss when she leaves. I take over little chores that she still does like packing the children's lunch box. Little things scattered all over the day. This seems to really improve things. I will stick to this strategy. We had some moments where we remembered good things, instead of falling into destructive behavioral patterns again. Another thing I take as a good sign is that we seem to get concious about the moment things go south, which helps to stop it from escalating by making each other aware of that before emotions take over too much.
I know we got a long way ahead, but I am no longer hopeless. I am a little scared about the marriage counselling though. I have never been to a psychologist or anything of that nature. At the same time I try to stay open-minded towards this new experience. I wonder what he will say to my past psychedelic use and her deep interest in conspiracy theories. I guess he needs to remain neutral about these things.
|
Warrk



Registered: 06/02/17
Posts: 1,623
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Anonymous #1] 1
#28222644 - 03/09/23 05:12 PM (10 months, 14 days ago) |
|
|
|
mran12
Stranger
Registered: 01/11/23
Posts: 9
Last seen: 7 months, 1 day
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: Anonymous #1] 2
#28222949 - 03/09/23 08:23 PM (10 months, 14 days ago) |
|
|
I can understand your concerns about her interest in conspiracy theories, but I think the bible can be a good thing. I got interested in the bible and read it for the first time when I was in my 30's, it's something I wouldn't have expected for myself. I realized there's a lot of valuable teachings there. Granted there was a process of figuring out what was useful and applying that to my life, but I think it has made a difference in my life and I have changed for the better. I don't believe everything that's in the bible, but I definitely believe in Jesus's teachings.
Would you be open to giving Christianity a try if you thought it could help your marriage?
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: I just quit all psychedelics and weed for good to save my marriage [Re: mran12]
#28223090 - 03/09/23 09:56 PM (10 months, 14 days ago) |
|
|
Quote:
mran12 said: I can understand your concerns about her interest in conspiracy theories, but I think the bible can be a good thing. I got interested in the bible and read it for the first time when I was in my 30's, it's something I wouldn't have expected for myself. I realized there's a lot of valuable teachings there. Granted there was a process of figuring out what was useful and applying that to my life, but I think it has made a difference in my life and I have changed for the better. I don't believe everything that's in the bible, but I definitely believe in Jesus's teachings.
Would you be open to giving Christianity a try if you thought it could help your marriage?
I used to be raised as a Christian but in a liberal way. My parents always gave me the feeling that I am free to leave Christianity behind whenever I decide to do so, which I did in my early teen years. In the country I grew up in religion isn't an integral part of life. I agree there are good moral teachings when it comes to Jesus and I am sure he was a good man.
Never the less I have my issues with organized religions in general and I can't see that it changes, especially since I got my own little construct of how it works for me. I don't really want to call what I have a religion. Even to the word god I have a difficult relationship. I prefer universe or anything in that direction. I feel I have a direct connection to whatever that is and that a middleman or guidance in that matter doesn't make sense and rather makes it more likely that this middleman wants to push his/hers version of his or hers truth on me. So you see I don't see myself as an atheist in that sense.
I have an issue with what has been done in the name of religions. I feel every religion has a good core and they are similar in many ways. But people use the faith of others to reach their own goals. Wars have been fought in the name of religion. No one can tell me that this was the initial idea. Different interest have been tried to push through in the name of religion. The bible for example leaves a lot of room for interpretation. Someone can just use it to tell you that abortion isn't right, gay people are bad and all that stuff. I don't know what Jesus would have said about that if he would know what happens these days in some parts of the world.
The bible has been rewritten many times and for a long time mostly monks were educated enough to read it till Martin Luther came along and translated it from latin for everyone to understand. I can imagine that much has been added or taken away over the millenia depending on how it seemed to make sense for the person who copied it at that time.
Speaking of Martin Luther. He was against a certain thing that was practised by the church back then. You probably know but amongst other things he had an issue with the following. "Wenn das Geld im Kasten klingt und die Seele von dem Fegefeuer in den Himmel springt." Which means as much as: "Once the coins fall into the box your soul will jump from hell to heaven." Back then is was common to "buy" yourself a ticket to heaven, if you knew you sinned. And this is a good example for me what's still going on today. The Catholic church is quite wealthy for example. It seems to me that money plays a big part in organized religion.
Can you remember what the popes opinion of condoms is? In Afrika AIDS is a huge issue and telling these people (that are generally very religious) condoms are against the will of god isn't helping.
I can't imagine that god is a sentient being telling people what to do. We are all connected and each one of us is a part of "it". I can't imagine that god is angry and one should be affraid of it. It just doesn't make sense to me.
I apologize for this rant, but I am just listing the issues I have to make you understand where I am coming from. These examples are just the tip of the iceberg of the issues I have. The above is a brainstorm kind of thing.
My wife started to study the bible because the leader of connecting consciousness believes that there are 12 different alien races or so which are all governed by the thing called god. He claims there are slave races and so on. Pretty out there I find and astonishing that people buy into it other than taking that as entertainment or something alike. It would make a good sci-fi movie at best. She looks for passages that you can interpretate or twist in a way that confirm that alien life has been on earth. (I think it's very likely that there is life in the universe other than on our planet by the way, but how would I know for sure that passages in the bible confirm an alien encounter?)
Remember the burning bush? If you really want to you can say this was actually an alien in disguise delivering a message. At the same time you could say it contained some psychoactive substance which when inhaled made it seem like it was talking. It's all about interpretation. As a person that inhaled a lot of psychoactive substances I know how it can feel when an entity suddenly appears and has a message for me.
Getting back to Jesus's teachings. As mentioned above, I don't have a problem with that. At the same time I believe one can find these moral lessons anywhere else even in non religious children books. It's not the only truth out there. If you really look hard enough you will see that you will find the answers to what's right and wrong within yourself. I think it's called natural law and this is what I followed. So far it worked for me.
I can't just scrap all of that and suddenly follow the Christian faith. I would be a hypocrite like I see a lot of people are just to fit in. I can't just change like a chameleon just to remain a good husband to my wife. I am sure there are other ways to coexist.
Edited by Anonymous (03/09/23 10:06 PM)
|
|