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maui
Registered: 11/20/14
Posts: 505
Last seen: 4 days, 19 hours
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Is it me? Or everyone else?
#28211353 - 03/02/23 05:30 PM (10 months, 22 days ago) |
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I could go on, and on, and on on this topic. But I will try and keep it short and sweet. The last couple years I have really been struggling to develop meaningful relationships. Im 27, almost 28. I get plenty of compliments on my appearance by girls and guys alike (im straight). My only good friend lives half the country away from me (USA). I do NOT struggle to meet people, but I do struggle to keep them around. My phone is littered with numbers from people I meet at the gym, through mutual friends, and many of them are from the bar. Thing is, they never reply. Wheter it just be to text about their day or to make plans. I just get ghosted. I play this "game" every month or so where I text everyone in my message history, then delete all the numbers and see who texts me back. Lets just say the results are very depressing. Can anyone relate or provide a mental framework for me?
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maui
Registered: 11/20/14
Posts: 505
Last seen: 4 days, 19 hours
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Re: Is it me? Or everyone else? [Re: maui]
#28211377 - 03/02/23 05:48 PM (10 months, 22 days ago) |
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Abombs
Chaotic Neutral



Registered: 08/17/21
Posts: 884
Last seen: 5 months, 22 days
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Re: Is it me? Or everyone else? [Re: maui]
#28211553 - 03/02/23 07:23 PM (10 months, 21 days ago) |
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That song was beautiful.! Reminds of the Disney short "lava".
I flat out cried at the theatre and still do. The kids put it on intentionally.
Makes me sad cuz I grew up just wanting someone to love me like that.
I struggle with all relationships. I dunno what to say about your situation.
I know why people don't stick around me. I suck at conversation and if they aren't good at steering the convo it stops.
I also avoid people in general including friends and family.
Now I just need to get out of work somehow
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loladoreen


Registered: 05/25/20
Posts: 5,339
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Re: Is it me? Or everyone else? [Re: maui]
#28211589 - 03/02/23 07:42 PM (10 months, 21 days ago) |
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Are you basing your feelings off of just the texting? Are you inviting people to do things with you? When you are with people what do you discuss?
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“One doesn’t have to operate with great malice to do great harm. The absence of empathy and understanding are sufficient.”
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Glacia



Registered: 02/28/19
Posts: 224
Loc: The Winterless North
Last seen: 1 day, 13 hours
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Re: Is it me? Or everyone else? [Re: maui]
#28213127 - 03/03/23 08:33 PM (10 months, 20 days ago) |
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Quote:
maui said: I could go on, and on, and on on this topic. But I will try and keep it short and sweet. The last couple years I have really been struggling to develop meaningful relationships. Im 27, almost 28. I get plenty of compliments on my appearance by girls and guys alike (im straight). My only good friend lives half the country away from me (USA). I do NOT struggle to meet people, but I do struggle to keep them around. My phone is littered with numbers from people I meet at the gym, through mutual friends, and many of them are from the bar. Thing is, they never reply. Wheter it just be to text about their day or to make plans. I just get ghosted. I play this "game" every month or so where I text everyone in my message history, then delete all the numbers and see who texts me back. Lets just say the results are very depressing. Can anyone relate or provide a mental framework for me?
I'm almost 21, and a girl/woman. People tell me I'm pretty, even heard it from guys so I'm starting to believe it but I don't get attention from guys. I got a lot of likes on Tinder and scored dates easily but, in real life guys are standoffish. I'm shy and introverted.
Advice, as a guy you will have to do the work approaching women sometimes, don't be too desperate, women can sense when you are. Don't play games. Make the first move and if they don't reply, they aren't worth your time.
I have 1 guy friend in real life I suppose but he's religious and I'm on this forum so I understand it will never work out lol, I got a crush on him and he texted me first. He got my number from my brother, we were friends before kinda. I'm not good at maintaining friendships nowadays cos of my depression, but if you're a gentleman many women will appreciate it.
So basically have your own life, hobbies and stuff and something really interesting then people are gonna wanna be a part of your life. Keep your friendships going and if someone wants to message you even a little bit, they will normally. I hope this is a bit helpful.
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loladoreen


Registered: 05/25/20
Posts: 5,339
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Re: Is it me? Or everyone else? [Re: maui]
#28213701 - 03/04/23 08:20 AM (10 months, 20 days ago) |
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Great advice
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“One doesn’t have to operate with great malice to do great harm. The absence of empathy and understanding are sufficient.”
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