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Anonymous #1
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Is this a threat?
#28201694 - 02/23/23 11:12 PM (10 months, 28 days ago) |
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I have a friend that is convinced I am his soulmate. He is a very good friend to me. I do not like him for more than a friend. He is convinced he is in love. When he realizes it he gets angry and goes and drinks all night. Recently, he has been lashing out. i.e. more and more. He just lashed out at my son (24yo) a few nights ago. Blaming my son that he and I are not together. Tonight he sent me a text that said I am about to see his bad side, that he can be my best friend or enemy. I am fucking mad. I don't ask him for anything. But he does alot to help me out. In fact I am in a relationship with someone else. I am really pissed off, I took the text as threatening. I dont do anything to be held against me with the exception of shrooms. Would you interpret it as a threat? He is living in my RV at my other house, where my son lives.
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Anonymous #2
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yes
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Anonymous #1
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Idk how to respond
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nooneman


Registered: 04/24/09
Posts: 14,555
Loc: Utah
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Sounds abusive. It's definitely a threat, and from the way he sounds, I bet he'd go through with it. You should be careful and take care of your own safety.
He's not a good friend if he's threatening you, that's not what a good friend does. He's jealous, he doesn't respect the boundaries you're setting, he doesn't respect your relationship, he's threatening you, all of that taken together sounds pretty serious. You should cut ties with him.
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Anonymous #2
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Re: Is this a threat? [Re: nooneman]
#28201768 - 02/24/23 12:23 AM (10 months, 28 days ago) |
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obaku
student of theuniverse


Registered: 01/31/03
Posts: 142
Loc: Northwest Oregon
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Are you sharing all this info with your son?
-------------------- The master's gone herb gathering, somewhere on the mountain, cloud-hidden, whereabouts unknown.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Is this a threat? [Re: obaku]
#28202344 - 02/24/23 10:57 AM (10 months, 28 days ago) |
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No my son would kick his ass And he'd call the police on him I can't tell my son
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Pluviophile
Stranger


Registered: 10/26/17
Posts: 3,093
Loc: Massachusetts
Last seen: 14 minutes, 2 seconds
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Tell your son to beat the guys ass, kick him out of your trailer and cut ties. What seams like empty threats and minor verbal abuse can escalate very very quickly.
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Pluviophile
Stranger


Registered: 10/26/17
Posts: 3,093
Loc: Massachusetts
Last seen: 14 minutes, 2 seconds
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Also you should take a break from any illegal activities such as mushroom grows or whatever until everything is resolved and there is no threat of getting ratted out.
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Anonymous #1
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You are getting very close to learning about Scorpio rising. You probablydon't want to do that right now. Not in your best interest. Trust me. I can be a friend or I can be an enemy. The choice is yours.
I try to be balanced. Getting very difficult.
Thats the text
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Anonymous #1
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Quote:
Pluviophile said: Tell your son to beat the guys ass, kick him out of your trailer and cut ties. What seams like empty threats and minor verbal abuse can escalate very very quickly.
My son is out on bail He can not risk this
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Mr.GuessWork
Stranger

Registered: 03/30/13
Posts: 4,563
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That is a very clear threat, and he clearly wanted you to feel threatened. That makes it objectively reasonable to take some action to protect yourself and your loved ones. I'd talk with your family first, so he can't surprise any of them, and then give the dude a clear reply and tell him that threats are completely unacceptable. I'd tell him to find a new place to live too. He's not trusted enough to live with and he's causing real problems. That's already intolerable, and it could easily snowball into worse troubles.
You should definitely let your son and your partner know what's going on and form a reasonable plan together. The guy might do something that affects them, and you don't want either of them to get surprised because you kept them out of the loop. Trust them a bit and form a unified front against the threat. I can understand the desire to beat the dudes ass, but you can probably workout a better way to get rid of the guy and keep your son out of trouble if you involve your son in the planning now and agree on a good plan to solve the problem together.
Dealing with a threat effectively is the best way to feel better about it. That applies to you and the people who care about your well being, like your son. Make it clear that you can find a way to get rid of the guy without your son getting in trouble. Protecting everybody should be a priority in solving the problem, and your son definitely doesn't need to end up in jail to deal with this guy. Explain that to him, make sure he's onboard, and I'm sure he'll be happy to help you get rid of the guy in a way that doesn't fuck himself over.
I'd get rid of any mushrooms for a while too. At least until you're in the clear.
EDIT: Don't rush to reply to that text BTW. Form a plan first, then use the reply to get rid of him. You don't owe him an explanation just for the sake of communication. He's using the open communication to cause problems and to try to control you. I'd say ghost him if he weren't living on your property by your son. Since you still need to tell him to fuck off, you should take the time to do it correctly and carefully.
Edited by Mr.GuessWork (02/24/23 11:37 AM)
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Anonymous #1
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Quote:
Mr.GuessWork said: That is a very clear threat, and he clearly wanted you to feel threatened. That makes it objectively reasonable to take some action to protect yourself and your loved ones. I'd talk with your family first, so he can't surprise any of them, and then give the dude a clear reply and tell him that threats are completely unacceptable. I'd tell him to find a new place to live too. He's not trusted enough to live with and he's causing real problems. That's already intolerable, and it could easily snowball into worse troubles.
You should definitely let your son and your partner know what's going on and form a reasonable plan together. The guy might do something that affects them, and you don't want either of them to get surprised because you kept them out of the loop. Trust them a bit and form a unified front against the threat. I can understand the desire to beat the dudes ass, but you can probably workout a better way to get rid of the guy and keep your son out of trouble if you involve your son in the planning now and agree on a good plan to solve the problem together.
Dealing with a threat effectively is the best way to feel better about it. That applies to you and the people who care about your well being, like your son. Make it clear that you can find a way to get rid of the guy without your son getting in trouble. Protecting everybody should be a priority in solving the problem, and your son definitely doesn't need to end up in jail to deal with this guy. Explain that to him, make sure he's onboard, and I'm sure he'll be happy to help you get rid of the guy in a way that doesn't fuck himself over.
I'd get rid of any mushrooms for a while too. At least until you're in the clear.
EDIT: Don't rush to reply to that text BTW. Form a plan first, then use the reply to get rid of him. You don't owe him an explanation just for the sake of communication. He's using the open communication to cause problems and to try to control you. I'd say ghost him if he weren't living on your property by your son. Since you still need to tell him to fuck off, you should take the time to do it correctly and carefully.
I feel he will try to get my son arrested. I'm 2 hours from home today. I have not replied to the text. My partner hasn't said much. He didn't know the guy wS in love with me. And I have not spoken to my son. What the fuck This is twisted
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Mr.GuessWork
Stranger

Registered: 03/30/13
Posts: 4,563
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You need to get your son in the loop. That's the only way to protect him. I think your suspicion sounds fair, and you don't want your son to get ambushed. Can you talk to your son and have him not react impulsively? Let him know you're figuring out what to do next and that the guy might try to get him arrested or try to manipulate him or get him to do something stupid that will get him in trouble. Basically tell him not to take the bait.
Whatever the law is, if everybody stays cool and focuses on getting rid of the guy in a rational way then this guy will either make a move that justifies calling the cops or he'll leave like he's been asked too. He already made a bad move, and it won't work out if nobody plays into his hands. The situation calls for a little patient action. I don't think you have enough cause to call the police ATM, but I could be wrong. Maybe somebody else knows more on that subject?
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Anonymous #1
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I guess he yelled at my son the other day. After I discussed me debating leaving my partner or staying. He told my son he yelled because he was angry at me. He has never been a romantic option for me. If im honest my son will probably not take it well.
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Anonymous #1
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I did message my son & say stay away from him But not why
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Mr.GuessWork
Stranger

Registered: 03/30/13
Posts: 4,563
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Your son only needs to take it well enough to avoid getting in trouble. I'm not sure how bad the situation is, but if the dude is blaming your son and yelling at him, then it's reasonable to assume that your kid's in some danger. I'd say take the risk and tell your son the guy might have it out for him and tell him what you think he might do, then help you son calm down and get started on protecting himself from the guy. Maybe he needs to stay at your place for a few days or something. Getting away from the dude and staying out of jail should be an easy thing to focus on. If you can give him that option, then that's what I'd do.
The only other piece of advice I have to give off hand is not to get distracted by other parts of the problem. I know it's overwhelming, but you only need to address the immediate threats in an urgent matter. Focus on what you need to do to get rid of the dude and how to do it, and how to protect your son from this guy. There's no reason to let this guy make a victim out of your kid. You can work through the other BS when your kid's safe.
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Mr.GuessWork
Stranger

Registered: 03/30/13
Posts: 4,563
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: I did message my son & say stay away from him But not why
that'll be hard if he lives with him, particularly if the guy is looking for him. If you can talk with your son and get him onboard with a good plan, then he'll be better off.
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Anonymous #1
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I told my son He flipped out
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Roflspammer
Strangest



Registered: 12/05/12
Posts: 1,901
Loc: New Hampshire
Last seen: 10 hours, 45 minutes
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: You are getting very close to learning about Scorpio rising.
  tell him to suck my dick 
Anyone who states they are about to invoke the power of astrology needs a seat.
OP, call the police and have a restraining order initiated. The sooner you get the police involved, the better off you'll be. Even if they don't do anything, there will be a record and therefore he will be de-incentivized to do anything a "scorpio rising" ( ) will do. This is 2023, the United States is a society. You live in a society. Use society to do what it's supposed to: protect yourself. Make sure your kid is out of sight if he's in trouble with the law, and lock up your contraband.
Scorpio rising... rising on my dick.
Edited by Roflspammer (02/24/23 02:38 PM)
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