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Kickle
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Difficulty
#28139223 - 01/14/23 09:30 AM (1 year, 14 days ago) |
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"when the going gets tough, the tough get going"
I'm trying to understand this phrase a little more. Where are the tough going to? Where do you go when things are tough?
I had a dream last night where I was suffocating and could not move. Probably a side effect of too much awareness of bodily sleep paralysis. In the dream I first tried to move my arms and had a mini T-Rex moment. The limbs seemed short and woefully ill equipped to do anything of use 
Then as the sense of frailty entered in I attempted to speak. And that emerged as a croak as the throat too was woefully ill equipped to manage words. And the lack of breathing became more real, as a suffocation. I was surprisingly calm despite the physical reactions.
But where did I turn? Where I always seem to when I am helpless to myself. Towards my female partner. Just mentally reaching out with a cry for help. And this woke me from the dream.
I went quickly back to sleep but reflecting on it this morning it left me with the pondering of Jungian notions of Anima/Animus.

But that's probably another thread all together. The more interesting aspect of this thread imo is what individual differences may exist in regards to where we turn/go when things are difficult.
So please share your own strategies here. When you are experiencing difficulty, where do you go?
-------------------- Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain
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redgreenvines
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Registered: 04/08/04
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Re: Difficulty [Re: Kickle]
#28139287 - 01/14/23 10:14 AM (1 year, 14 days ago) |
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A) https://www.washingtonpost.com/archive/lifestyle/1980/08/21/when-the-going-gets-tough-the-tough-make-commercials/442ecda0-1447-4bad-ac83-e82975130a0e/
B) immersing into breath awareness and letting go. A long time ago (with salvia divinorum) I learned to be as simple as possible during mental dire straits - because my memory and ability to understand is drastically reduced to near nothing while feeling of alarm is rampant.
anything conceptual like Jung or even SEX is beyond me at those moments.
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Kickle
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Yeah, breath awareness was that of suffocation. Which is what booted me to otherness.
You could rephrase this a lot of ways. IMO everyone depends on things outside of the abilities of their own physicality. Like maybe its a doctor that you go to when the physical is failing. Or maybe it's God. Or maybe it's a combination of things.
I've had experiences of brain aneurysms and other such physical failings and I tend to go to the one I trust the most. Which may indicate some notion of "other half" inherent in my view. A deep trust akin to the trust in my self. The Jungian part is a relational examination of that tendency, probably not relevant to most.
-------------------- Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain
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redgreenvines
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Re: Difficulty [Re: Kickle]
#28139362 - 01/14/23 10:49 AM (1 year, 14 days ago) |
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Quote:
Kickle said: Yeah, breath awareness was that of suffocation. Which is what booted me to otherness.
You could rephrase this a lot of ways. IMO everyone depends on things outside of the abilities of their own physicality. Like maybe its a doctor that you go to when the physical is failing. Or maybe it's God. Or maybe it's a combination of things.
I've had experiences of brain aneurysms and other such physical failings and I tend to go to the one I trust the most. Which may indicate some notion of "other half" inherent in my view. A deep trust akin to the trust in my self. The Jungian part is a relational examination of that tendency, probably not relevant to most.
I have been under the surgical knife several times in my life stupid appendix stupid horseshoe kidney stupid nasal polyps etc.
fortunately society channeled me, I have so little faith in sloppy doctors, only the appendectomy was done right and that was 64 years ago.
i'm still kicking and screaming "no no Mr Bill!" to the rest.
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Kickle
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Medical stuff is tough.
-------------------- Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain
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redgreenvines
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Re: Difficulty [Re: Kickle]
#28139413 - 01/14/23 11:37 AM (1 year, 14 days ago) |
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Quote:
Kickle said: Medical stuff is tough.
mostly 'cause they barely passed the exams.
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Buster_Brown
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Re: Difficulty [Re: Kickle] 1
#28139418 - 01/14/23 11:40 AM (1 year, 14 days ago) |
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The principle I use is "Supportive element within the matrix wherein children play". Having thus reminded myself I wait for inspiration which is then filtered thru various strainers if I can remember them, alowing that I can be treated as I treat others.
Obviously not everybody agrees with my choice of filters but that's OK, they have their principles and I have mine.
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loladoreen


Registered: 05/25/20
Posts: 5,327
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"When the going gets tough, the tough get going"
My interpretation is "get going" is moving on or moving through. For myself I use different coping skills that are conscious and unconscious. I unconsciously shut down. That is my first response with trauma. When my son passed away I shut down. I have almost no memory of a few months. I think I was still in shock. Other traumas in my life, the same. I first shut down. After my initial shut down, dependent on big the trauma, I start planning. How I will "get going" move through, make changes, get myself ok. Which I believe is where I start to apply my coping skills. Where do I go? Deep inside myself. Where do I physically go? The woods
Edited by loladoreen (01/14/23 06:19 PM)
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Kickle
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Thanks for sharing. I think that is a good interpretation of what it means to get going as well. Don't stop/dwell.
Been seeing you around a few forums and you have a great presence here at the Shroomery. Happy to see you.
-------------------- Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain
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loladoreen


Registered: 05/25/20
Posts: 5,327
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Re: Difficulty [Re: Kickle]
#28140076 - 01/14/23 06:51 PM (1 year, 13 days ago) |
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Quote:
Kickle said: Thanks for sharing. I think that is a good interpretation of what it means to get going as well. Don't stop/dwell.
Been seeing you around a few forums and you have a great presence here at the Shroomery. Happy to see you. 
Very kind of you. Thank you. I enjoy a stimulating mature conversation.
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“One doesn’t have to operate with great malice to do great harm. The absence of empathy and understanding are sufficient.”
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BrendanFlock
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Well.. I think it depends on the depth of discomfort of the toughness of being at that moment
Start from most.. which needs the will to save ones life.. The flight or fight response so to speak..
But most of the time I just do nothing in the face of adversity.. quietly mocking it.. as if to say " I recognize you but you can't do nothing to me"
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redgreenvines
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RJ Tubs 202



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Re: Difficulty [Re: Kickle]
#28142737 - 01/16/23 11:43 AM (1 year, 12 days ago) |
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Quote:
Kickle said:
The more interesting aspect of this thread imo is what individual differences may exist in regards to where we turn/go when things are difficult.
A couple of thoughts. I think this is a call to action. When things get tough, it's wise to have a game plan. A plan to not be devoured by emotional disturbances (resentment, jealousy, anger, depression, anxiety). A plan to confront and avert disturbing attitudes when they arise.
I like the idea of problem solving as it relates to this. When we have a problem, we need to explore potential solutions. If I feel lonely & depressed, I can get drunk and watch a movie, or I can try to actually solve the problem, instead of ignoring it. Ignoring our problems is the opposite of self-care. It might be called self-harm.
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Kickle
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Ignoring our problems is the opposite of self-care. It might be called self-harm.
I think so too. But in respect to the planning, or figuring out how to navigate without being overwhelmed, I think ignoring it can also be seen as "buying time".
Sooner or later it has to be faced. But some things we don't have any experience with and as such no game plan. Buying time is understandable in those circumstances. And it's a great kindness to be able to reflect on ourselves in this way. To acknowledge we were ill equipped and needed some time to figure it out. That happens to all of us IMO and has reason to be acknowledged as very human.
The Dalai Lama said something that has been bouncing around my head for a few days. And it was about this idea of a lotus blooming. It takes time. It's not like you plant a seed and then suddenly you have this fully bloomed lotus. No, it is a process.
-------------------- Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain
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BrendanFlock
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Quote:
redgreenvines said:

Beautiful...
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