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Offlinestarpig
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How to get a personality or make friends?
    #27904465 - 08/15/22 02:54 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

I’ll keep it short I always manage to lose friends because I don’t have a personality. People are nice to me sure but when I try to make something more it never works out, people no matter the walk of life get bored and leave. It’s very lonely.

I mean I generally like myself and all that, more or less. But I’m thinking it’s wrong that if you like yourself the rest is easy, or however that saying goes.

It’s been a constant thing since I was a kid, I’ve always kind of felt like no one. It make it next to impossible to relate to and befriend others because there was “no one there.”

People don’t notice me at all, I can leave and enter without attention. It’s like I’m a ghost.

But so far trying to have a personality feels like I’m faking it. What do I do?


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InvisibleLynnch
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27905464 - 08/16/22 10:41 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Sitting in your room on your phone turns you into a boring person.

You have to go out into the world and do things. Then you'll have a story to tell. Successes and failures build personality.


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Lynnch]
    #27905481 - 08/16/22 10:51 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

I’ve had both though  and emerged relatively unchanged by them.


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Offlineschpat
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27906299 - 08/17/22 04:27 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

This may not help you make friends directly but doing these things will make you an awesome person.  People like to be friends with awesome people

A basic enumeration of the five tenets of schpatism (an ism in flux)

1. Look after yourself
Much like children, and disabled passengers, the rest of the world/universe/multiverse can not be made better by your presence if you are not able to act at your full capacity.  Make sure you are looking after yourself in whatever way is best.  Take care of the things that will stop you from performing at your peak. Be one with yourself.  Let go of things that are holding you back or making you unhappy.  Do not dull the brightness of your days.

2. Look after others
Be kind, help others, provide “hoschpataility”.  Do what you can to create contentment in those around you.  Provide what they need if it is within you. Help them find what they need if it isn’t. 

3. Be honest with others
Tell people what you are thinking, be honest.  If you need help, ask for it.  Communication is key to mutual understanding and benefit.

4. Open your mind
Life, the universe, and existence are unfathomably complex. None of us can truly understand everything all at once.  Accept this, but seek understanding anyway.  Don’t get stuck, enjoy the novel.

5. Intentionally create joy to offset the unintentional harm you inevitably cause.
No being can live life without unintended consequence.  Negative externalities are inevitable.  Balance these by intentionally creating as much joy as possible.  This is where the pinatas fit in.


--------------------


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OfflineJewstress
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Lynnch]
    #27906318 - 08/17/22 05:09 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Lynnch said:
Sitting in your room on your phone turns you into a boring person.

You have to go out into the world and do things. Then you'll have a story to tell. Successes and failures build personality.





LOL NOT TRUE.


I’m a stoop kid and I drive my whole town crazyyyy.


--------------------


😇


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OfflineJewstress
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27906321 - 08/17/22 05:11 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
I’ll keep it short I always manage to lose friends because I don’t have a personality. People are nice to me sure but when I try to make something more it never works out, people no matter the walk of life get bored and leave. It’s very lonely.

I mean I generally like myself and all that, more or less. But I’m thinking it’s wrong that if you like yourself the rest is easy, or however that saying goes.

It’s been a constant thing since I was a kid, I’ve always kind of felt like no one. It make it next to impossible to relate to and befriend others because there was “no one there.”

People don’t notice me at all, I can leave and enter without attention. It’s like I’m a ghost.

But so far trying to have a personality feels like I’m faking it. What do I do?





Come hang out with me on my front porch cause this is a fucking vibe.


Only difference is people notice me now since I started spaZzinf out. I have lost a lot of “friends” over the past decade. Typically for the better too.


Sometimes it’s better just to be a loner; especially if people aren’t on the same energy wave length as you.



DONT LET THE VAMPIRES GET YOU


--------------------


😇


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: schpat]
    #27906570 - 08/17/22 09:40 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Quote:

schpat said:
This may not help you make friends directly but doing these things will make you an awesome person.  People like to be friends with awesome people

A basic enumeration of the five tenets of schpatism (an ism in flux)

1. Look after yourself
Much like children, and disabled passengers, the rest of the world/universe/multiverse can not be made better by your presence if you are not able to act at your full capacity.  Make sure you are looking after yourself in whatever way is best.  Take care of the things that will stop you from performing at your peak. Be one with yourself.  Let go of things that are holding you back or making you unhappy.  Do not dull the brightness of your days.

2. Look after others
Be kind, help others, provide “hoschpataility”.  Do what you can to create contentment in those around you.  Provide what they need if it is within you. Help them find what they need if it isn’t. 

3. Be honest with others
Tell people what you are thinking, be honest.  If you need help, ask for it.  Communication is key to mutual understanding and benefit.

4. Open your mind
Life, the universe, and existence are unfathomably complex. None of us can truly understand everything all at once.  Accept this, but seek understanding anyway.  Don’t get stuck, enjoy the novel.

5. Intentionally create joy to offset the unintentional harm you inevitably cause.
No being can live life without unintended consequence.  Negative externalities are inevitable.  Balance these by intentionally creating as much joy as possible.  This is where the pinatas fit in.



I do all that stuff already but I’m just invisible to other people around me


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Offlineschpat
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27906964 - 08/17/22 03:32 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Practice tenet three.  Tell them you feel invisible, tell them it hurts you, ask them if they can see why you'd think that.  Have a one on one, venerable conversation.  Tell them what you want to offer, find out if they want it.  If they don't it's ok find someone who will.

If you truly feel you have no personality and that there is no-one inside then practice tenet one and find a professional that can help you see yourself. 

I know you are wrong that there is no-one there, everyone has a personality.  It seems to me that you are a good person, a shitty person wouldn't care.


--------------------


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: schpat]
    #27907049 - 08/17/22 04:38 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Quote:

schpat said:
Practice tenet three.  Tell them you feel invisible, tell them it hurts you, ask them if they can see why you'd think that.  Have a one on one, venerable conversation.  Tell them what you want to offer, find out if they want it.  If they don't it's ok find someone who will.

If you truly feel you have no personality and that there is no-one inside then practice tenet one and find a professional that can help you see yourself. 

I know you are wrong that there is no-one there, everyone has a personality.  It seems to me that you are a good person, a shitty person wouldn't care.




Telling them that doesn't work as it just makes you look desperate and clingy.

I've also been to a professional many times, several even and nothing came out of it because there was nothing inside.


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Offlineashfiken
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27907334 - 08/17/22 08:53 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

A personality is somewhat also a makeup of who you WANT to be as well as what brought you to this point.
Maybe you need to work on what you wanna be, WHO you wanna be, and that would provide some substance.
What are your values ? What level of morality do you expect from yourself and fellow humans.
What makes you really tick or passionate?
What do you wanna do with your time here?
What have you done with your time here?
What do you strive for? If anything.
How many times have you set your mind to something and ensured it was accomplished to your own fulfillment? What were those things?
What do you like to spend time doing?
Do you have pets?
Do you like psychedelics?
What music are you into?
Do you have any shareable hobbies like gardening or playing music, or hiking?
Are you positive neutral or a pain to be around?
What kind of fun, do you like to have?, just silly fun.
What kind of humor do you enjoy? If any


All of these things are questions that upon an answer, can be rolled into many more to make up ones personality.
I'm not requesting answers to these questions myself necessarily,  but they may help you see or find a way to who you wanna be and who you are now. Recreating oneself is something we do and should do all the time. Bc if you are growing(if you ain't growing you're dying, I like to say), then you are in a potential state of recreation of yourself.
Be who you want to be.
Any attempt to carve out your own image of yourself, in your mind, will result in a better recollection of that and where your personality/character has gotten to up until now.
That insight can usually garner a desire to continue reinforcing these traits about yourself as well as simultaneously negating other traits.
Until you know your own character or personality and have some relationship with that yourself to whatever degree, it's very hard for others to see it and appreciate it or hate it, so instead they seem to not pay attention to what's not there.
Unfortunately I feel for you, bc I'd almost rather be hated than ignored.
Often I get to enjoy this depending what subset of our culture I'm am currently surrounded by. Which brings me to I guess my last thought, one usually tries to seek companionship in like minded people, bc that way it is much easier to be understood.
That may be a path but you have to have a self background of what that may be before you can seek it out.

Also to do this recreation, or trying to have a personality as you put it, can feel fake , at first.
But when you live something, and live it and live it and believe it in, even if at first it may be forced, you will eventually coincide with it, without any forced feeling or action


--------------------
hmm...

"I'm naked and fearless... And my fear is naked."

"life isn't worth living without the threat of death"

"I got my plans in a ziploc bag, let's see how unproductive we can be"

"nobody lives their lives fully except for bull fighters"

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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: ashfiken]
    #27907756 - 08/18/22 06:58 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

I don’t really have values, I don’t really expect any level of morality from myself or others. Nothing makes me tick or passionate, I don’t know what I wanna do with my time here,I strive for nothing. I haven’t really accomplished anything to my fulfillment. I mostly just find things to kill time, I have pets but they’re not really mine. I listen to anything that sounds good so it doesn’t matter, no hobbies, no one notices when I’m around. I don’t really enjoy any kind of fun and I don’t have a set sense of humor.

So you can see I really don’t have a personality and I’m not really anybody.

I can’t be who I want to be because there no one I want to be. I don’t have a character or personality, I know who I am and it’s nobody. There is nothing about me redeeming or interesting, I’m just a ghost.


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Offlineashfiken
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27908518 - 08/18/22 04:56 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

So what do you do all day? Sleep and eat?
Do you cook for yourself? Do you hate doing so? Do you like it?
You really must set your goal to be to find things you like in this reality. Or things you want to see or do or taste or whatever. Find a way to have any amount of joy or fun. If you search long enough, there has to be things that would atleast pique your interest.
I am sorry you haven't found any enjoyment or even pain really out of life bc if nothing is important and nothing is to your taste and you do nothing. Then your experience must be a very barren landscape
I suggest you try new things until you run out of time, money, or you find something that you can say you enjoy.
If you don't like anything at all how can anyone like you?
You must find some interests.
You must find some drives or something that drives you.
Having goals and destinations and interests only behooves people to see you and be interested.
What would you talk about with friends, if you are so unenamored by the world.
I hope you can find a way to get some better answers to the above questions bc that is definitely the problem. Seek seek seek until you have something anything to begin building a foundation of your individual  life, instead of essentially abyss. Even negative shit and ppl are more attractive to others than a neutral unmoved colorless person or object.


--------------------
hmm...

"I'm naked and fearless... And my fear is naked."

"life isn't worth living without the threat of death"

"I got my plans in a ziploc bag, let's see how unproductive we can be"

"nobody lives their lives fully except for bull fighters"

My Trade List


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: ashfiken]
    #27908626 - 08/18/22 06:42 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Quote:

ashfiken said:
So what do you do all day? Sleep and eat?
Do you cook for yourself? Do you hate doing so? Do you like it?
You really must set your goal to be to find things you like in this reality. Or things you want to see or do or taste or whatever. Find a way to have any amount of joy or fun. If you search long enough, there has to be things that would atleast pique your interest.
I am sorry you haven't found any enjoyment or even pain really out of life bc if nothing is important and nothing is to your taste and you do nothing. Then your experience must be a very barren landscape
I suggest you try new things until you run out of time, money, or you find something that you can say you enjoy.
If you don't like anything at all how can anyone like you?
You must find some interests.
You must find some drives or something that drives you.
Having goals and destinations and interests only behooves people to see you and be interested.
What would you talk about with friends, if you are so unenamored by the world.
I hope you can find a way to get some better answers to the above questions bc that is definitely the problem. Seek seek seek until you have something anything to begin building a foundation of your individual  life, instead of essentially abyss. Even negative shit and ppl are more attractive to others than a neutral unmoved colorless person or object.




I effectively just sleep and eat, everything else is just sort of filler for the day. I don't cook for myself and when I have to I don't enjoy it.

I've pretty much tried everything and so far nothing really interests me, it's all just passing fancies that once I try to delve into I lose interest.

There is nothing in this life I can't live without though by contrast that means there's nothing I really care about either.

I have no idea what I would talk about with other people or friends, I just know I'm lonely.

I've been all over and tried everything, more or less, but nothing sticks. It all just blows away the next day. Been that way since I was a kid, made college suck because nothing really grabbed me.

I guess I figure "Why try hard at life when you don't have to" "what's the point" "we don't HAVE to do anything". None of it really matters at the end of it all since you can't take it with you. Deep down I sort of knew that as a kid, I questioned why people gave a damn about all this stuff when they can't take it with them.


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Offlineashfiken
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27908666 - 08/18/22 07:12 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

I can understand and relate to the nihilistic thought patterns.
I really believe you need to keep at it.
There's no possible way you have tried EVERYTHING.
However seeing that what piques your interest ends as passing fancies means that nothing you have found so far fulfills you, and that is tough.
You definitely need fulfillment to make connections to your self.
You must ask why everything is so languid and boring to you. If you are not protecting yourself by detachment or holding detachment on a pedestal, then you need attachment. Prob need it more than anything I can think of regardless of these things.
Do you enjoy your food? Or do you just feed your machine?
Do you like to be massaged caressed or cared for? Even simple sensation can catalyze into human building stuff..
Do you ever enjoy or like the personalities of other ppl you meet?
What about them do you enjoy? If any.
Caring is human also, you need to care about something, same goes for values.
If you don't value your own life for instance, and what it can give Bring or take away, then how would someone else be able to value you in a friendship? There would be no mutual anything. One cannot expect someone to value them, when there is none going the other way or any way for that matter.
Even something basic like valuing the food that keeps you alive can turn into a fruitful endeavor.
Appreciation goes far too. It sounds like you feel you have nothing to appreciate anything for and no desire to do so.
Would you rather have not been born, and not to have lived? Even the most basic idea like this should be appreciated and can begin a path where you realize the other things that brought you here and can take you much farther if you learn to live on this earth humbly and grateful.
Honestly that kinda appreciation/grace is the first thing I really look for in a human that I would like to encounter more often.
None of this is simple for you I can see, but is the only way I feel you can recapture your life to fulfillment in the ways you seem to want and need. Nobody deserves to remain lonely and outcast, unless they did some heinous shit. I sincerely hope you can find some passion to life/live for, and can then share that amongst other possible friendly entities.


--------------------
hmm...

"I'm naked and fearless... And my fear is naked."

"life isn't worth living without the threat of death"

"I got my plans in a ziploc bag, let's see how unproductive we can be"

"nobody lives their lives fully except for bull fighters"

My Trade List


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: ashfiken]
    #27908852 - 08/18/22 09:56 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Do you enjoy your food? Or do you just feed your machine?
Do you like to be massaged caressed or cared for? Even simple sensation can catalyze into human building stuff..
Do you ever enjoy or like the personalities of other ppl you meet?
What about them do you enjoy? If any.
Caring is human also, you need to care about something, same goes for values.




Food is food I guess. It tastes good but I don't put too much thought into it. I guess I like other personalities, but that doesn't really light anything in me.

I don't really have any hard values, I don't really care about anything. As a kid I wanted to see the end of the world so I guess that answers things.

Quote:

Would you rather have not been born, and not to have lived? Even the most basic idea like this should be appreciated and can begin a path where you realize the other things that brought you here and can take you much farther if you learn to live on this earth humbly and grateful.




Still on the fence about that, though I'm leaning more towards rather not having been born for lots of reasons. Once I saw how much of a chore life is it's hard to see it any other way.

I've tried gratitude but it felt fake and like I was lying to myself because I wasn't really grateful for anything. I exist simply because I lack the strength to take my own life.

As I keep saying I've done pretty much every hobby there is and nothing, I feel no real investment in any of it.


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OfflineRescueU
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27910579 - 08/20/22 12:56 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

You gotta go mingle and work at it.


Join a social group that forces interaction in person. An activity that requires cooperation such as a team sport, a running club, pickle ball league, etc. Go to a trivia night, have a drink to loosen up the lips.

If you're enjoying yourself, people will enjoy you. If you sit there being the quiet wierdo.....well...


--------------------
UT ALII VIVANT


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InvisibleLynnch
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 2
    #27910614 - 08/20/22 01:42 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

You sound clinically depressed my dude.


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: RescueU]
    #27910948 - 08/20/22 09:09 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

They actually don’t. Often when I enjoy myself people don’t really talk to me or engage. I’m ignored whether I’m quiet or having fun.

I’ve been to social groups that force interaction, I’ve done team sports, even karaoke and stuff like that. But the result is the same, nothing changes no matter how much I change my approach or who I’m with.


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Lynnch]
    #27910949 - 08/20/22 09:10 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Maybe. But I just know I’ve been like this since I was a kid, perpetually hollow and never really interested in much of anything. Never enough to bond with anyone over


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OfflineTrancedOutBrah
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27911094 - 08/20/22 10:48 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

You sound severely depressed and honestly should consider talking to a doctor and consider anti-depressants.

The way you talk about life is pretty clear that you just get no joy from life.


--------------------
Lead by example, words mean little when your actions don't reflect what you say.

Spread kindness, love, empathy, compassion.

Learn from mistakes. Try and do better. Each day is a new day, try to make it a better one.

Coconut and Avocado is awesome for the skin.

MIND OVER MATTER

:mushroom2::lsd:


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: TrancedOutBrah]
    #27911402 - 08/20/22 02:23 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Well once I realized I didn't have to do anything a lot of the energy of life just got sucked out. Even more so when I realized that none of it matters when you die since you can't take any of it with you.

I've been to doctors, therapists, and on meds, but it never changed anything because it wasn't a chemical issue in the brain. It's a matter of philosophy and none of them could really give me a good reason to give a damn, despite me really hoping to be wrong.

Like there are things I believe that I want to be wrong about but so far the arguments are just the same prepackaged stuff that life is worthwhile and I just don't believe them. WHY? Just because they think so? They don't live my life or others lives so how can they make such a blanket statement?


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OfflineTrancedOutBrah
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 2
    #27911511 - 08/20/22 04:04 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

I mean you sound insufferable, really.

You call it a philosophy, is it really? You so clearly want to connect with others, yet why would anyone want to connect with someone who doesn't even want to try the bare minimums in life? What are you going to talk about, how terrible life is?

You don't care to do anything, you don't care for anyone, you don't even WANT to try... I'm not sure what you want from this thread.

Nobody can give you the motivation you need to go out and do things to develop yourself, to develop hobbies.

You definitely sound depressed and lack motivation to do even the basic things in life.

You've tried every medication under the sun? You've talked with how many therapists? How far have you really gone in order to try to improve your life?

You either keep trying to improve your life or this will be it. Whatever this is.


--------------------
Lead by example, words mean little when your actions don't reflect what you say.

Spread kindness, love, empathy, compassion.

Learn from mistakes. Try and do better. Each day is a new day, try to make it a better one.

Coconut and Avocado is awesome for the skin.

MIND OVER MATTER

:mushroom2::lsd:


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: TrancedOutBrah]
    #27912335 - 08/21/22 11:32 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Quote:

TrancedOutBrah said:
I mean you sound insufferable, really.

You call it a philosophy, is it really? You so clearly want to connect with others, yet why would anyone want to connect with someone who doesn't even want to try the bare minimums in life? What are you going to talk about, how terrible life is?

You don't care to do anything, you don't care for anyone, you don't even WANT to try... I'm not sure what you want from this thread.

Nobody can give you the motivation you need to go out and do things to develop yourself, to develop hobbies.

You definitely sound depressed and lack motivation to do even the basic things in life.

You've tried every medication under the sun? You've talked with how many therapists? How far have you really gone in order to try to improve your life?

You either keep trying to improve your life or this will be it. Whatever this is.



I have tried the bare minimums in life, like I already mentioned before, but nothing really sticks or interests me.

I literally just explained all of it on the last page.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27912351 - 08/21/22 11:54 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
Well once I realized I didn't have to do anything a lot of the energy of life just got sucked out. Even more so when I realized that none of it matters when you die since you can't take any of it with you.

I've been to doctors, therapists, and on meds, but it never changed anything because it wasn't a chemical issue in the brain. It's a matter of philosophy and none of them could really give me a good reason to give a damn, despite me really hoping to be wrong.

Like there are things I believe that I want to be wrong about but so far the arguments are just the same prepackaged stuff that life is worthwhile and I just don't believe them. WHY? Just because they think so? They don't live my life or others lives so how can they make such a blanket statement?




Yeah, none of it matters when you die.  That means the only thing that matters is how you live.  Life is about the journey not the destination.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27912359 - 08/21/22 12:06 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

OP, I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess you spent most of your life staring at a phone and hijacking your brain
Now everything else in the world that is worth a damn seems too difficult to be worth the effort because it's not hitting your dopamine receptors like the shit on your phone or TV

That's a lame fucking excuse to say your problem has to do with your philosophy about life


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: TheStallionMang] * 1
    #27912500 - 08/21/22 02:29 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

All the things you've tried are entry level, team sports and karaoke lol. Try something a bit out of the norm. Take out a loan and go travel, like right now, be spontaneous. Throw your phone away and go to a country that doesn't speak English. Don't take a personal device, delete your social media if you have it. Jump in the deep end. It may not interest you to do this but one things for sure you'll have a he'll of a story that people will want to hear.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: TheStallionMang]
    #27912719 - 08/21/22 06:07 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Quote:

TheStallionMang said:
OP, I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess you spent most of your life staring at a phone and hijacking your brain
Now everything else in the world that is worth a damn seems too difficult to be worth the effort because it's not hitting your dopamine receptors like the shit on your phone or TV

That's a lame fucking excuse to say your problem has to do with your philosophy about life




Quite the opposite in fact. I've pretty much been into every sort of activity their is from the general like bars, clubs, sports games, sports themselves, etc. To other stuff like gaming, tcgs, comics, gardening, fishing, shooting, hiking, etc. None of it really clicked in me at all, I would be over it in about a week.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27912722 - 08/21/22 06:08 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Markamello said:
All the things you've tried are entry level, team sports and karaoke lol. Try something a bit out of the norm. Take out a loan and go travel, like right now, be spontaneous. Throw your phone away and go to a country that doesn't speak English. Don't take a personal device, delete your social media if you have it. Jump in the deep end. It may not interest you to do this but one things for sure you'll have a he'll of a story that people will want to hear.




That is a terrible idea, especially since I wouldn't be able to get a loan with my student debt.

Seriously though that has to be the dumbest idea I've ever heard of and a quick path to an early grave.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27912742 - 08/21/22 06:25 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

It takes more than a week to get into anything
What are you into?


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27912794 - 08/21/22 07:33 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Call it what you like but I've done it without a phone in south america for 20 months and Africa for 12 months. I did it pre smart device in Asia for a year and with a phone for a year in central america.

I'm fine.

In fact I learned so much about myself, the world, culture and life in general that the thought of starting an anonymous thread crying that I'm boring and have no friends has never crossed my mind.

I even learned multiple skills along the way to start up and ultimately sell 2 succefull business between my later trips to fund my travels.

Maybe I misunderstood the purpose of the thread because the question mark at the end of the thread title implied that you were looking for responses.

If life has taught me one thing it's that when you think you know how life works, you'll soon find out that you don't know shit. I don't pretend to act like I know everything in order to remain humble but you just may be an exception to that and it seems that you know every fucking thing so just keep on keeping on and existing as you are. It seems like it's all going to plan for you.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27913048 - 08/22/22 12:55 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

I tend to agree with a few others…I even reached out to Starpig thinking “oh, starpig can’t be that bad” - well, how I was wrong!

You are your own worst enemy, it is your fault that you hold this perception of yourself and on life, in which I’d dare say is the reason you push people away or remove yourself before anything meaningful could occur.

I think you need a little more self reflection on what it is that you want from life moving forward and if that is more “personal” connection, then you need a change in the way you perceive people, yourself, and life in general.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27913220 - 08/22/22 06:53 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

What you are is lucky. That doesn’t work out well for a lot of people. Hence why it’s a bad idea. You because you survived doesn’t mean anything.

I don’t pretend to know everything but I know that no matter where you go it’s not the different. None of it really answers the question of why give a damn when none of it ultimately matters?

It’s like that response about taking a vacation only to find out you can’t escape your mind or the nagging questions.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Buster30]
    #27913222 - 08/22/22 06:57 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Buster30 said:
I tend to agree with a few others…I even reached out to Starpig thinking “oh, starpig can’t be that bad” - well, how I was wrong!

You are your own worst enemy, it is your fault that you hold this perception of yourself and on life, in which I’d dare say is the reason you push people away or remove yourself before anything meaningful could occur.

I think you need a little more self reflection on what it is that you want from life moving forward and if that is more “personal” connection, then you need a change in the way you perceive people, yourself, and life in general.




It’s not my fault I hold this perception on life, I didn’t choose to see life this way or to be convinced by whatever led me here.

I’ve done nothing but self reflection on the matter but it just leads nowhere. No matter how much I ask myself the question of what it is I want out of life or what to do I get nothing in return. Null. I’m as empty as I was 15 years ago as a teen. Nothing I try or get into moves or inspires me and it gets dropped in a week. I don’t think anyone would choose to be that way if they could help it .

I want to be able to have something I’m passionate about that moves me or gives me a reason to even tolerate this existence, but nothing I’ve tried has done that and every time I fail I lose a little more hope.

But then again that’s attachment which according to Buddhism is bad.

It’s likely that I am hollow, that there is nothing inside me, because how else can someone have tried a these things and still feel nothing towards it all.


Edited by starpig (08/22/22 07:01 AM)


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27913268 - 08/22/22 07:39 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
It’s not my fault I hold this perception on life, I didn’t choose to see life this way or to be convinced by whatever led me here.





Yeah yeah, you're just a victim of your own thoughts...

You never even said what things you "tried to get into"


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: TheStallionMang]
    #27913455 - 08/22/22 10:07 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

It’s a long list.

All I can really remember is that as a kid what I was interested in didn’t “make money”. I was interested in insects and the ocean, also art, but apparently none of that made money. It made me sad that what I cared about couldn’t make money and I’d have to pick a safe job.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27913911 - 08/22/22 04:33 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

If I’m being honest though it’s because I always quit something the minute there’s any set back, or effort or sacrifice that is required of me. So I never get more than a surface level of stuff and that’s why I never develop anything worth caring about, even in stuff I like and want to do.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27919008 - 08/25/22 11:01 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Have you experimented with psychedelics? Im sure that would make your life and personality more interesting/creative to other people.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: LogicaL Chaos]
    #27919137 - 08/26/22 05:04 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

They really don’t do that and no I haven’t. They seem to have mixed results on people. I’m also sure drugs aren’t a substitute for a personality. Nor would they make my life more interesting.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27920378 - 08/26/22 09:13 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

But how can you know that without actually living thru the experience?


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: LogicaL Chaos] * 1
    #27920573 - 08/27/22 01:39 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

The op has a personality, its just a negative, argumentative, know-it-all personality. People with personalities like this come across as dickheads so other people distance themselves from people like that.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27920587 - 08/27/22 02:04 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Do you have any loved ones? People or any life you care about? Like have you had any pets?

Usually what people do when unfortunately what they truly want to do in life doesn't make any money; they have the safe job, but then also do what they love in their leisure time.

Life is about balance and I think you just haven't found the right balance for you yet.

Taking care of animals generally gives people a reason to live and animals provide therapy in a way nothing else does.

You're interested in the ocean, maybe an aquarium with species you love could cheer you up. Give you some motivation. Just a suggestion based on what I know about you thus far from this thread. I need to know more about you to really help though which is why I asked those questions and will probably ask a few more based on your answers.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: LogicaL Chaos]
    #27920665 - 08/27/22 05:29 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

A lot of evidence and experiences from others show that the results are mixed. From what I got it mostly just reinforces what you already believe. In any case it doesn’t make you more interesting or give a personality.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27920666 - 08/27/22 05:30 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Markamello said:
The op has a personality, its just a negative, argumentative, know-it-all personality. People with personalities like this come across as dickheads so other people distance themselves from people like that.



Your idea was a bad one just because you made it out ok doesn’t make it good. Going to a country with no money and not speaking the language doesn’t usually end well.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27920673 - 08/27/22 05:41 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

I don’t really have loved ones. I have two dogs though but they weren’t my choice to have, they were what my family wanted after we kept promising no more dogs.

I generally see taking care of animals as a burden and not really something that gives me a reason to live. And animals don’t really provide therapy because they don’t always love you back, at least with every dog I’ve had. They all only really came to me when no one else was around.

It feels like I’m into the ocean right now but I honestly don’t know how long that would last. That’s always been my issue, nothing is really an interest or hobby it’s just a weekly obsession that gets thrown away in the end and then something else feels right. There’s nothing I can ever act on because it never lasts. I though I was into bugs and when I delved into after a week I was bored. I got a bunch of books on the ocean feeling like it was right and I couldn’t wait to get into it and even planned to see the aquarium. End of the week comes, never read the books and lost any desire to go to the aquarium.

So I don’t think I have anything inside that drives me. Nothing true or honest, just emptiness and I think that’s why I never have any luck. Because people can look at me and see essentially a husk of a person. No passion, drive, or anything significant.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27921063 - 08/27/22 11:17 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

This is nothing more than a whiny bitch fest for OP
Closed the damn thread already


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: TheStallionMang]
    #27921093 - 08/27/22 11:36 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

TheStallionMang said:
This is nothing more than a whiny bitch fest for OP
Closed the damn thread already



I already mentioned how your assessment of me was wrong, I don’t know what you’re trying to get at.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27921096 - 08/27/22 11:38 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

So based on that answer, it is highly likely you are going through some sort of mental imprisonment regarding the week timeline thing.  It's not necessarily your fault, it could be just a thought pattern you've stuck yourself in, nutrient deficiency or a mental disorder. Bipolar, depression, OCD. It could not be, I have a couple more questions at the end of this post. You already predict you will get bored of something so you actually do get bored of it. Realistically, if anyone believes they will get bored of something, naturally, they would. Thoughts are meant to become real or not, based on what we choose to be real or not. Which is why our brain and what we think is so important to our life.

There's something called the law of attraction. I suggest you look into it. A simple super brief summary about it:

People have life goals and everything they do, while it may seem it's not in a linear path to that goal, their thoughts and choices everyday however will eventually lead to their goals or at least open doors in regards to those goals. Some people are aware about it, others aren't so that's one of the reasons when someone gets an opportunity they wanted or a network connection they need for their goals they may say something like "I feel so lucky" for example.

I think you've lost control of your own thoughts and that's why you feel empty. Everything in your life is going exactly how you think it to go really.

For example, you don't really want the dogs and you see them as a burden, which is fine you have a right to your opinion, however, at the same time you are not happy regarding the fact they only come to you when no one else is around and actually base your opinion on animals like dogs because of that experience.

Animals are useful for therapy and they tell us nearly everything we need to know about someone. Despite your feelings towards your dogs, they still go to you because dogs love unconditionally. Why would you be their first choice when there are other family members who they know wants them and don't see them as a burden?

Because you are mentioning drive, what is your diet and exercise routine like?


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Edited by r3volution.gurl (08/27/22 11:45 AM)


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27921139 - 08/27/22 12:00 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

I think you've lost control of your own thoughts and that's why you feel empty. Everything in your life is going exactly how you think it to go really.




Not really. This has just been a recurring issue. It has nothing to do with me expecting it (I don’t) but rather that it’s just a pattern that happens across my life. I find something I’m excited about and get bored immediately after. Each time I have hope that I finally found something and then get crushed when it doesn’t work out. Everything in my life also didn’t go how I thought it would, the opposite in fact, but that’s a very long story.

Quote:

Animals are useful for therapy and they tell us nearly everything we need to know about someone. Despite your feelings towards your dogs, they still go to you because dogs love unconditionally. Why would you be their first choice when there are other family members who they know wants them and don't see them as a burden?

Because you are mentioning drive, what is your diet and exercise routine like?




They actually don’t tell us everything we need to know about someone, that’s a myth. I’ve seen dogs react badly to someone who never hurt them and who’s very sweet, case in point one of my dogs. Terrified of everyone who isn’t us but especially my grandmother (who did nothing to him). I think it’s a nice notion but there isn’t evidence to back that. Dogs don’t know if you think of them as a burden. My last three that I wanted and did everything for never came to me at all. One who loved the most wanted nothing to do with me no matter what I did so that sort of proves that notion of dogs wrong for me.

Diet is ok, exercise is regular, but neither really affect my drive.

The law of attraction is pure junk. It’s been proven wrong time and again, stuff happens whether you want it to or not regardless of what you’re thinking (and I can attest to that). You just have to deal with what life gives you if you can.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27921226 - 08/27/22 01:02 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
Quote:

I think you've lost control of your own thoughts and that's why you feel empty. Everything in your life is going exactly how you think it to go really.




Not really. This has just been a recurring issue. It has nothing to do with me expecting it (I don’t) but rather that it’s just a pattern that happens across my life. I find something I’m excited about and get bored immediately after. Each time I have hope that I finally found something and then get crushed when it doesn’t work out. Everything in my life also didn’t go how I thought it would, the opposite in fact, but that’s a very long story.




You admit it's a recurring issue, but you yourself don't know what's causing that issue. Getting excited about something isn't a reason to stay motivated. It's great you get excited, but something is causing your boredom and so far, you haven't any real answers why that is. What is your most specific reason you believe why?

You're used to getting bored, but it's not what you want and that's why you're here and made this thread.

Quote:


They actually don’t tell us everything we need to know about someone, that’s a myth. I’ve seen dogs react badly to someone who never hurt them and who’s very sweet, case in point one of my dogs. Terrified of everyone who isn’t us but especially my grandmother (who did nothing to him). I think it’s a nice notion but there isn’t evidence to back that. Dogs don’t know if you think of them as a burden. My last three that I wanted and did everything for never came to me at all. One who loved the most wanted nothing to do with me no matter what I did so that sort of proves that notion of dogs wrong for me.





So I've actually trained dogs for a living and dabbled in dog psychology. Sure, you would be right if you're talking about an unstable dog which it sounds like you have one. That alone leaves me with much more experience and knowledge than you on this topic. I've trained and rehabilitated dozens of dogs and none were unstable because of my leadership. An unstable dog is a telltale sign of an unstable owner. Not saying that's you, but someone in your household if you have a fearful nervous dog. It's not normal dog behaviour.

Everything I said was regarding stable dogs only and I have the evidence to back that up. I can bring an array of studies regarding therapy dogs for example and what they can tell doctors about their patients. You tend to base your facts solely on your perception of the world and I'm not sure that's a great idea considering you're asking for advice and help. I'm not here to argue with you, I don't talk about things I don't know much about. You have to accept that you possibly don't know everything there is to know about a given topic, for example; dogs and that could be a reason why you get bored because your desire for learning beyond your opinions and experiences doesn't exist. Therefore whatever it is you get excited about, once you've formed your given opinion on it, the desire to continue on disappears, meanwhile you can't learn everything there is to know about something within a week. It's impossible regarding topics like psychology, ocean biology, animal behaviour etc.

Quote:


Diet is ok, exercise is regular, but neither really affect my drive.





By diet is ok, what do you mean exactly? What does a day of your diet look like? Like what kind of meals and how many meals per day? Do you practice any intermittent fasting?

Exercise is proven neurologically to affect drive, otherwise people wouldn't be motivated to continue to exercise or do it regularly. What do you do exactly for exercise? Cardio? Weight training? How many times per week for both cardio and weight training? Do you know about Calisthenic exercise?

Quote:


The law of attraction is pure junk. It’s been proven wrong time and again, stuff happens whether you want it to or not regardless of what you’re thinking (and I can attest to that). You just have to deal with what life gives you if you can.




So in the field of psychology, it hasn't been proven wrong, which is where it legitimately matters as far as it's benefit to people. Thoughts are powerful. People are in cognitive behavioural therapy for negative thoughts. Negative thoughts are usually a symptom of a larger problem, not always, but their detriment to an individual thinking them no matter the reason or cause is very real. I have so many studies and sources to back that up. I can also attest to that personally, but attestations mean nothing really and I don't base my opinions solely on my perspective, but also the work scientists and experts in the field are constantly doing. You seem like you will learn until you've believed you've formed an educated opinion on something and then never bother to keep up with the ever changing information and new discoveries which could be a cause of your boredom also.

I think deep down, you are looking for an answer or reason to your issue that unfortunately either isn't true or doesn't exist. There is no magic answer here. You are the master of your universe and your thoughts and choices, are your thoughts and choices. If you feel like they weren't then you're not in control of your life period.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27921424 - 08/27/22 03:04 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

You admit it's a recurring issue, but you yourself don't know what's causing that issue. Getting excited about something isn't a reason to stay motivated. It's great you get excited, but something is causing your boredom and so far, you haven't any real answers why that is. What is your most specific reason you believe why?

You're used to getting bored, but it's not what you want and that's why you're here and made this thread.




I don't know why. Maybe because all of it takes work to do? Or maybe when I get into learning more about it it's not as fun as I thought it would be. Nothing I like really lasts long to make something of it. It's all just surface level interest, nothing that keeps me going.

Quote:

I can bring an array of studies regarding therapy dogs for example and what they can tell doctors about their patients. You tend to base your facts solely on your perception of the world and I'm not sure that's a great idea considering you're asking for advice and help. I'm not here to argue with you, I don't talk about things I don't know much about. You have to accept that you possibly don't know everything there is to know about a given topic, for example; dogs and that could be a reason why you get bored because your desire for learning beyond your opinions and experiences doesn't exist. Therefore whatever it is you get excited about, once you've formed your given opinion on it, the desire to continue on disappears, meanwhile you can't learn everything there is to know about something within a week. It's impossible regarding topics like psychology, ocean biology, animal behaviour etc.




Therapy dogs don't really count because they are trained to look and respond in certain ways. Animals on their own don't do that which kind of proves my point about animals not being able to tell you everything about a person.

It's not a matter of learning everything it's that as soon as I start the motivation evaporates for no reason. Gone, and I just spent a bunch of money committing to something I have no interest in.

Quote:

Exercise is proven neurologically to affect drive, otherwise people wouldn't be motivated to continue to exercise or do it regularly. What do you do exactly for exercise? Cardio? Weight training? How many times per week for both cardio and weight training? Do you know about Calisthenic exercise?




Cardio and weight training. But the research just shows it CAN do that, it's not proven directly. In my case it doesn't change anything.

Quote:

So in the field of psychology, it hasn't been proven wrong, which is where it legitimately matters as far as it's benefit to people. Thoughts are powerful. People are in cognitive behavioural therapy for negative thoughts. Negative thoughts are usually a symptom of a larger problem, not always, but their detriment to an individual thinking them no matter the reason or cause is very real. I have so many studies and sources to back that up. I can also attest to that personally, but attestations mean nothing really and I don't base my opinions solely on my perspective, but also the work scientists and experts in the field are constantly doing. You seem like you will learn until you've believed you've formed an educated opinion on something and then never bother to keep up with the ever changing information and new discoveries which could be a cause of your boredom also.

I think deep down, you are looking for an answer or reason to your issue that unfortunately either isn't true or doesn't exist. There is no magic answer here. You are the master of your universe and your thoughts and choices, are your thoughts and choices. If you feel like they weren't then you're not in control of your life period.




It actually has. The law of attraction is not real and does not exist. There isn't really anything to back up that negative thoughts impact a person because you can't really prove that someone is having them. And in some cases, like myself, they don't affect the outcome of an action. I can't count the number of times where truly believing I would mess up or fail didn't happen, and the times when I thought I would didn't work out. Thoughts don't impact reality, they are just electrical impulses across the brain.

And if you're referring to the effectiveness of therapy, recent studies seem to place it's effectiveness at just over 50%.

I have kept up with the changing information which is how I can tell when you aren't being truthful. But in the case of the law of attraction you don't need studies to prove that is false. It was just made to sell books, that's it.

Quote:

You are the master of your universe and your thoughts and choices, are your thoughts and choices. If you feel like they weren't then you're not in control of your life period.




I don't control what I like, where I'm born, who my family is, what convinces me, what I dislike, my learning ability, my thoughts, etc etc. There is a lot we are not in control off. We aren't masters of our own universe, we just believe that because it makes life tolerable.

If I could have a passion or interest I would, but no amount of effort has made anything stick. That isn't something I can really control.


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OfflineLogicaL ChaosM
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27921438 - 08/27/22 03:14 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Starpig, im pretty sure you have Anhedonia. You should research on it: https://www.webmd.com/depression/what-is-anhedonia

From Page 1:

Quote:

Nothing makes me tick or passionate, I don’t know what I wanna do with my time here,I strive for nothing. I haven’t really accomplished anything to my fulfillment. I mostly just find things to kill time, I have pets but they’re not really mine. I listen to anything that sounds good so it doesn’t matter, no hobbies, no one notices when I’m around. I don’t really enjoy any kind of fun and I don’t have a set sense of humor.




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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: LogicaL Chaos]
    #27921523 - 08/27/22 04:18 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

It's more like there is nothing stable for me to act on, nothing lasts more than a day or a week so I end up having no real interests or passions to share or develop.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27921848 - 08/27/22 09:40 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
I don't know why. Maybe because all of it takes work to do? Or maybe when I get into learning more about it it's not as fun as I thought it would be. Nothing I like really lasts long to make something of it. It's all just surface level interest, nothing that keeps me going.




The 'why' is the key to all your problems though. At least you are aware something isn't quite right. I have to agree with logical chaos. I think the professionals you saw were crap. This really sounds like Anhedonia. What's even more interesting is you've never had a baseline to compare yourself throughout your life because as you've shared, you've always been this way.

Quote:

Therapy dogs don't really count because they are trained to look and respond in certain ways. Animals on their own don't do that which kind of proves my point about animals not being able to tell you everything about a person.




You are confusing therapy dogs with service animals. Anyone's pet can become a therapy animal. Any stable dog(mostly non protective breeds) would pass this certification because dogs are naturally therapeutic when stable. The standards are really just friendliness, a clean bill of health and basic obedience. The reason breed plays a role is some breeds are aloof to strangers as they were bred for guarding and protection. However, with their family they provide those therapeutic qualities.

Quote:

Therapy dogs may be trained by just about anyone, but must meet set standards to be dog certification and registration and actively participate in the program. They are usually handled by their owners, but in some cases of Animal Assisted Therapy, the therapy dog may be handled by a trained professional.




https://www.therapydogs.com/service-dog-vs-therapy-dog/#:~:text=Therapy%20dogs%20may%20be%20trained,handled%20by%20a%20trained%20professional.

This link above has multiple studies of therapy animals and their benefits. Again, these are not service animals. Service animals are not allowed to behave like dogs while working as they have a specific task to perform(I can elaborate what this means).

This is why I explained to you, you don't have the knowledge or experience to come to a conclusion on whether animals would help you or not. I've estasblished you just don't like animals. Similar to the opinion regarding psychedelics. We are here to help and it seems like you prefer to argue instead of figuring out how these suggestions could actually help you. I've been there, not my whole life like you have, but listening to what other people have to say(which you do that so great!), but also applying and learning from others when they might know more than you is what you are missing in life. It pushes people away. It ruins the opportunity for any relationship, let alone a healthy one. You are subconciously telling people around you, that you know what's best and have a wall up to the possibility you might be wrong or misinformed.

When you are infact wrong or misinformed, people like myself in regards to the therapy animal topic, then don't have a desire to form a relationship with you(it isn't personal) because why bother, it's extra work for me, when I have other people in my life that would be willing to listen, do their own research to back up what they heard and apply it how it suits them. If it helps, great, if it doesn't there are 8 billion people full of suggestions. It's about trying. Which I think your effort exerted is very different from majority of people's.

Quote:


It's not a matter of learning everything it's that as soon as I start the motivation evaporates for no reason. Gone, and I just spent a bunch of money committing to something I have no interest in.




Hmmm see that's an issue. I've never spent any money on something until I've expelled all the free resources online which usually takes months. Don't get me wrong though, I've gotten into something like video game streaming for months, spent all the money on it then quit because I wasn't interested anymore. That happens to everyone, but within a week? That's a red flag. It almost sounds like manic episodes. You get excited about something, put everything you got into it, your expectations weren't met and you're back at square one.

Quote:

Cardio and weight training. But the research just shows it CAN do that, it's not proven directly. In my case it doesn't change anything.




No... I'm sorry, you are wrong(again).

This literature is more general on all the benefits of exercises, not much tangible evidence in regards to devices used.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5928534/#!po=1.16667

This literature is specific to the neurological effect of exercise on the chemicals of the brain.(plenty of evidence)

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4061837/

This literature is specific to the neurological effect to the prefrontal cortex.(plenty of evidence, even uses neural imaging)

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3951958/


This what the prefrontal cortex is 'responsible for'. Self efficacy..

https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/psychpedia/prefrontal-cortex

So... I just have one question. What motivates you to work out and why?

Quote:

It actually has. The law of attraction is not real and does not exist. There isn't really anything to back up that negative thoughts impact a person because you can't really prove that someone is having them. And in some cases, like myself, they don't affect the outcome of an action. I can't count the number of times where truly believing I would mess up or fail didn't happen, and the times when I thought I would didn't work out. Thoughts don't impact reality, they are just electrical impulses across the brain.




I really didn't want to have to explain this, but yes, the term "law of attraction" is coined. However, there is scientific data to back up positive and negative thoughts and how it affects our physical and mental health which affects outcomes in our life. Unfortunately, because of how the term was used to make money, science is more behind than they should be in that regard, but there is still ample evidence to support how one's thoughts matter in quality of life. Also, I don't even know the "laws" of attraction. It's really the concept I know and how it makes a difference in people's lives and how people use the concept to achieve what they want in life. Meditation is another form relating.

This will be the last time I post studies to support my arguments because I didn't write in this thread to argue with you.

This literature is regarding positive thoughts.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3788860/

This literature is about negative thoughts.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6554130/

This one is about negative thoughts and how it relates to anxiety and depression which we know affects decision making and outcomes.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2899011/

Another negative thought study and how they hinder learning, affect tasks, interpersonal relationships, achievement goals and cognitive resources.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5836010/

This article resonates with you.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4830281/

Some negative thoughts are infact beneficial in specific circumstances for motivation, but in your case, let's agree they aren't or you wouldn't be here.

Quote:


And if you're referring to the effectiveness of therapy, recent studies seem to place it's effectiveness at just over 50%.




Feel free to post any study. Based off of everything else, I'm going to go out on a limb and think you are generally misinformed. Cognitive behavioural therapy is a very specific type of therapy. You're probably talking about therapy in general by any therapist. I really don't care because I've wasted hours sourcing all this info and this is potentially why you don't have meaningful relationships because people feel like you waste their time. You're wasting my time with these arguments. But again, nothing personal. I waste my time a lot here, but not like this and I personally dislike it and wish to not continue putting effort in proving what I know because if I don't know something, I usually wouldn't bother saying it.

Quote:


I have kept up with the changing information which is how I can tell when you aren't being truthful. But in the case of the law of attraction you don't need studies to prove that is false. It was just made to sell books, that's it.




This isn't about truth. It is about knowledge, information and lack thereof. Law of attraction is a basic concept helpful for a lot of people working towards their goals in life. You used attestation as a source for evidence. Law of attraction has tons of non profitable personal attestations of success in life. It really depends on one's definition of success.

Quote:

I don't control what I like, where I'm born, who my family is, what convinces me, what I dislike, my learning ability, my thoughts, etc etc. There is a lot we are not in control off. We aren't masters of our own universe, we just believe that because it makes life tolerable.

If I could have a passion or interest I would, but no amount of effort has made anything stick. That isn't something I can really control.




Yeah.. you need a lot of help my friend. I strongly suggest you head on back to a professional, probably completely different like a PhD psychologist if you truly believe you can't control your own thoughts. Sure there are moments when thoughts are uncontrollable, but majority of the time, you should be capable, if not you need to learn the tools to. Psychology provides those tools.

I do agree that we have certain beliefs to make life tolerable. Have you seen our civilization? It's absolutely horrifying. It's not tolerable without effort. I prefer to make the best of what I can control. I've got life goals of living off grid and nurturing the natural environment and want a variety of animals to experience daily. Not excited about the burden of their care, but there are trade offs life. A balance as mentioned earlier of things we don't want to do to have things we do want.

You need professional help 100%. As someone said earlier, you are your own worst enemy, but only you can ultimately help yourself. No one else has any answers that will help you because you've made that clear. You need someone to help you find those answers that you respect and admire. And based on all the misinformation, I can't even be sure everything you write here is accurate so I definitely cannot help you find those answers. But the reason you workout may give a hint to something else.


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27921851 - 08/27/22 09:41 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Yeah I know y'all

:tldr:

I can't summarize this anymore. Apologies.


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27921871 - 08/27/22 09:58 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

I can't count the number of times where truly believing I would mess up or fail didn't happen, and the times when I thought I would didn't work out.




I also want to comment on this.

You have misunderstood the concept of law of attraction or at least what I meant on it.

Believing without any effort is absolutely useless.

For a real example in my daily life, I can believe all day this endometriosis disease I have won't affect me any longer, but if I don't actually do anything to support that it's useless. If I continue to drink alcohol or put harmful foods in my body, I am not actually practicing in real life what I think. Which is what I meant in regards to making thoughts real and the choices which follow them. Thoughts are the start of this process, not the entirety it alone.

Shit also happens so unless you are specific on what exactly you're talking about, it really holds no weight.

Someone could want to exceed a certain percentage on an exam and think they were going to, but didn't. There are a lot of variables. There are a lot of variables we aren't in control of, but there are some variables we are in control of. It is factually incorrect to disagree and think we as humans have no control over anything at all especially our own thoughts and choices majority of the time.

I just thought about what I'd like to eat and what pertains to what I should eat vs what I shouldn't based on my disease and the choices I have at home in stock. I'm hungry too.


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27921933 - 08/27/22 11:16 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

That research is iffy as there isn't really a meaningful way to show what is a positive or negative emotion, that sounds too arbitrary to be considered science, so those studies aren't worth much.

Quote:

This is why I explained to you, you don't have the knowledge or experience to come to a conclusion on whether animals would help you or not. I've estasblished you just don't like animals.




You actually haven't you just jumped the gun on that one. I like animals just not having to care for them as pets. And I do know that animals can't tell you about a person.

Quote:

You are subconciously telling people around you, that you know what's best and have a wall up to the possibility you might be wrong or misinformed.




More like it's all the same advice that hasn't worked.

Quote:

No... I'm sorry, you are wrong(again).

This literature is more general on all the benefits of exercises, not much tangible evidence in regards to devices used.




Again, no. IT just says that it can, it's not a sure thing and in my case it didn't make any difference in mood or drive. I felt the same either way.

Quote:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6554130/




This is meaningless as it just quotes a bunch of self-help books.

Quote:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2899011/




Also meaningless as it was just self-reporting, it doesn't prove negative thinking and I mentioned how arbitrary that label is.

Quote:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5836010/




This one literally mentions the findings are variable.

Quote:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4830281/




Again, meaningless because negative and positive are arbitrary.

Quote:

Law of attraction is a basic concept helpful for a lot of people working towards their goals in life. You used attestation as a source for evidence. Law of attraction has tons of non profitable personal attestations of success in life. It really depends on one's definition of success.





Except it isn't. It's not a real thing that helps or impacts people. How you think or feel about a situation doesn't affect the outcome of it. They've even tested it and found it to be false. Those attestations are meaningless as there is no way to know if it really is the law of attraction or bias, and it doesn't measure the thousands of failures either.

Quote:

Yeah.. you need a lot of help my friend. I strongly suggest you head on back to a professional, probably completely different like a PhD psychologist if you truly believe you can't control your own thoughts. Sure there are moments when thoughts are uncontrollable, but majority of the time, you should be capable, if not you need to learn the tools to. Psychology provides those tools.




NO it doesn't. You can't control your thoughts, psychology even says so. Why do you think the pink elephant is a popular experiment to demonstrate that you have no control over your thoughts. Even tons of eastern philosophy agrees with that.

I've been to professionals but they couldn't do anything about it, no meds would work either they all just made me feel worse.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27921939 - 08/27/22 11:23 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

You have misunderstood the concept of law of attraction or at least what I meant on it.




This is a common defense when pointed out that it's not real.

Quote:

It is factually incorrect to disagree and think we as humans have no control over anything at all especially our own thoughts and choices majority of the time.




It's actually not, especially considering recent psychological research that contests the notion of free will. We really don't have control over a lot of stuff in life. Where you are born dramatically impacts you and you can't control that. Nor your parents, how you are raised, what convinces you, what you like or dislike or your thoughts. So, with so much out of control we really aren't masters of our destiny and it's delusional to think we are.

Quote:

Believing without any effort is absolutely useless.




And now you know why the law of attraction is useless.

What you are describing is just plain old trying, which isn't impacted by belief as I showed already. Thoughts don't affect reality because thoughts aren't reality (to borrow buddhist thought).

There just isn't anything to support your claim. I and others can attest how we think about a situation has no bearing on the outcome or the effort, like I tried to explain. I can believe something won't work but when tried it does, and vice versa. There just isn't a tie between the two.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27921950 - 08/27/22 11:52 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

But to answer I only worked out for the approval of other people, I didn’t really enjoy doing it. Still don’t.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27921954 - 08/28/22 12:02 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Surely op is trolling.
Close the thread.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello] * 1
    #27921966 - 08/28/22 12:21 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

I’ve briefly read over everything being said so I may have missed a lot. With that said I think bringing awareness to the decisions ‘we make’ helps us to choose the best possible outcome. When I’m in a negative mood and have lost my awareness in negative thought loops I will be influenced by emotional habitual responses. This is usually the ‘wrong’ choice. If I’m bringing awareness to the situation and not getting so absorbed into my emotional state and the accompanying thoughts, or vice versa, I make the ‘better’ choice.

This then will lead to a more positive outlook and I’ll notice all of the good that happens to me even though the bad is also still there. I’m just less absorbed in it. It then seems like I’m attracting more positivity into my life, which I am with better decision making, while not being as impacted by the bad events. If this wasn’t so coherent I apologize, I’ve had a 🥃 and a 💨


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27921989 - 08/28/22 01:11 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Post a single source to back up anything you claim and then maybe you'd have any sort of leg to stand on in regards to the arguments.

You don't like being proven wrong. You skipped admitting a mistake in regards to therapy animals, by doing that you've avoided the important points I made regarding it from the beginning. You also skipped questions regarding the diet and your reason for working out is for other people. It's no wonder you don't reap the benefits of it. You're not doing it right..

Quote:

That research is iffy as there isn't really a meaningful way to show what is a positive or negative emotion, that sounds too arbitrary to be considered science, so those studies aren't worth much.




Like I explained before, you believe you know best over actual doctors, psychologists and researchers who have put the work in and got results which will continue to expand and solidify these findings, while you can't be bothered to do something for more than a week. Yeah, I'm annoyed now.

I honestly gave you the benefit of the doubt, but it's tough to even want to talk to you dude. You're legit full of crap. You've presented no information and you've just responded to everyone's info provided with solely your opinions which were consistently hostile. Other than some of the questions you answered which was the only positive in our interaction. 

You keep mentioning about where you were born and lack of control of that. Newsflash, no one has control of that, it's not a reason for someone to feel the way you do. It makes 0 sense and you seem like you lie to yourself when you make excuses about people's suggestions not being able to help you. I honestly think based on your behaviour, you have unresolved trauma you failed to mention relating to your family/upbringing and that's a huge factor in why today you are suffering.


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


Edited by r3volution.gurl (08/28/22 01:29 AM)


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27922019 - 08/28/22 02:09 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
Those attestations are meaningless




Quote:

starpig said:
I and others can attest how we think about a situation has no bearing on the outcome or the effort, like I tried to explain.




:lolwut:

The contradictions and hypocrisy are out of control.

Let's be honest, you didn't really understand the literature I posted, it backed 90% of my total claims especially regarding neurological data of the brain and the benefits of therapy dogs for patients of mental and physical illness. You cherry picked what little conflicting info in normally every study ever published suits your already established opinions. If you were to actually want to apply consensus accurate information, it would mean you'd be wrong and possibly have to make significant changes in your life because a lot of the cause of your problems would be discovered or at least on the path to, but you're comfortable in the state you're in. You also haven't posted a single study, but have made as many claims as I have. Just post one study with a claim you've made. It's almost like the effort you put in this argument, is representative of the effort in your life. You do next to nothing, but genuinely believe you've done everything you're supposed to for a beneficial result, even believing you've done beyond that and all that "effort" doesn't equate to anything. It's a true mystery to solve. And you said I'm delusional..

People will not change for you. Your expectations are unrealistic. Things don't just happen for people, life doesn't work like that for anyone or any life for that matter. Like I've said before, no one can help you. People can only help you help yourself. That's the reason professional help has failed you in the past or should I say, why you failed..


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: cubedryeguy]
    #27922174 - 08/28/22 07:23 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

cubedryeguy said:
I’ve briefly read over everything being said so I may have missed a lot. With that said I think bringing awareness to the decisions ‘we make’ helps us to choose the best possible outcome. When I’m in a negative mood and have lost my awareness in negative thought loops I will be influenced by emotional habitual responses. This is usually the ‘wrong’ choice. If I’m bringing awareness to the situation and not getting so absorbed into my emotional state and the accompanying thoughts, or vice versa, I make the ‘better’ choice.

This then will lead to a more positive outlook and I’ll notice all of the good that happens to me even though the bad is also still there. I’m just less absorbed in it. It then seems like I’m attracting more positivity into my life, which I am with better decision making, while not being as impacted by the bad events. If this wasn’t so coherent I apologize, I’ve had a 🥃 and a 💨




Aren't positive/negative and good and bad not real? I mean they're just opinions, it's not science. You can't attract more positivity or negativity in life because stuff is neutral.


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27922189 - 08/28/22 07:43 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

I honestly gave you the benefit of the doubt, but it's tough to even want to talk to you dude. You're legit full of crap. You've presented no information and you've just responded to everyone's info provided with solely your opinions which were consistently hostile. Other than some of the questions you answered which was the only positive in our interaction.




I checked the sources, but you have to understand that stuff like positive and negative emotions/thoughts isn't really science. Those are value judgments, there is no universal standard for what is considered positive or negative which tends to make such research have little weight. One link you posted was literally just quoting a bunch of self-help books and a self-report examination. You have to see how this doesn't really verify what you're saying.

Quote:

You also skipped questions regarding the diet and your reason for working out is for other people. It's no wonder you don't reap the benefits of it. You're not doing it right..





The motivation behind it is irrelevant, the point is the action behind it. The act of doing it is supposed to have these benefits and I mentioned that all the research shows it CAN do that, CAN being the keyword. It's not a sure thing and nothing in the research shows the motivation behind it matters. It sounds like you're making excuses for why something doesn't work for someone.

That like you posted has zero studies about the effectiveness of therapy animals it's just a webpage for an organization. All it has are a bunch of pages making claims. So, you proved nothing. I CHECKED each source you posted to verify it and when looking at each one it didn't hold up. Yeah I bothered to read through each one.

Quote:

If you were to actually want to apply consensus accurate information,




You mention that but you could just have easily copy pasted a bunch of sources that support you. And I showed how those sources are pretty much worthless. So, in a sense you haven't posted anything that supports your claims, and I checked the study on anhedonia, I don't think it means what you think it does.

I think it's clear you don't understand what it evidence, nor why psychology is a weak science and the studies don't carry much weight. There was that reproducibility crisis a little while ago where over half the research published in psychology could not be verified or reproduced. That and as a field it doesn't really publish null results.

Or to apty quote: "Because psychology often does not meet the five basic requirements for a field to be considered scientifically rigorous: clearly defined terminology, quantifiability, highly controlled experimental conditions, reproducibility and, finally, predictability and testability."

So pretty much their words don't mean that much, especially when it comes to positive and negative thinking which they cannot verify nor prove.

Quote:

People will not change for you. Your expectations are unrealistic. Things don't just happen for people, life doesn't work like that for anyone or any life for that matter. Like I've said before, no one can help you. People can only help you help yourself. That's the reason professional help has failed you in the past or should I say, why you failed..





No, it's more that everything they gave me didn't work when done. Professional help might as well be quack help. No meds worked, they just made me feel worse than before and none of the tricks they taught me made any difference, but they were more than happy to take my money.


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Invisibler3volution.gurl
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27922340 - 08/28/22 09:58 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
I checked the sources, but you have to understand that stuff like positive and negative emotions/thoughts isn't really science. Those are value judgments, there is no universal standard for what is considered positive or negative which tends to make such research have little weight. One link you posted was literally just quoting a bunch of self-help books and a self-report examination. You have to see how this doesn't really verify what you're saying.




That was 1 out of multiple studies I posted, once again, you're cherry picking. Yes thoughts can be value judgements, but their effects are proven in 2 studies I posted and it's not difficult to decipher between positive and negative thoughts. One study explaining how positive thinkers were something like 13% less likely to get heart disease despite being genetically prone to than negative thinkers with the same predisposition.

If a thought impacts someone's life negatively, it's easily deemed a negative thought. A lot of what I said was infact verified. You cognitively choose to keep being delusional based on your uneducated opinions.

Quote:

The motivation behind it is irrelevant, the point is the action behind it. The act of doing it is supposed to have these benefits and I mentioned that all the research shows it CAN do that, CAN being the keyword. It's not a sure thing and nothing in the research shows the motivation behind it matters. It sounds like you're making excuses for why something doesn't work for someone.




Yeah no.. you're not exercising to your full/beneficial potential if you're not doing it for yourself. Feel free to be specific about one of your workouts. That's why a small percentage of people in some of those studies either saw no benefits or even negative effects from exercising and one of the studies highlighted how disinterest in exercise would affect the quality of exercise while also the opposite of too much interest and over exercising. If you don't enjoy any of your workouts, you're doing it wrong. The research did show that. Also, healthy workouts increase the size and strength of the prefrontal cortex and hippocampus which is proven through neural imaging in one of the studies I posted. The prefrontal cortex is responsible for motivation and self efficacy plus a lot of other things. You can stay in denial though. Seems to be a trend for you.

Quote:


That like you posted has zero studies about the effectiveness of therapy animals it's just a webpage for an organization. All it has are a bunch of pages making claims. So, you proved nothing. I CHECKED each source you posted to verify it and when looking at each one it didn't hold up. Yeah I bothered to read through each one.




I forgot to post the correct link underneath the source of the quote. There's at least 4 studies there.

https://www.uclahealth.org/pac/animal-assisted-therapy

You're not a credible source to deem whether a study holds up or not. You haven't posted a single source or study even once.

Quote:


You mention that but you could just have easily copy pasted a bunch of sources that support you. And I showed how those sources are pretty much worthless. So, in a sense you haven't posted anything that supports your claims, and I checked the study on anhedonia, I don't think it means what you think it does.




Oh boy, that wasn't a study on Anhedonia. It was just explaining what it was. Actually, you haven't showed anything. You just talked. Those are all the studies relating to the topics at hand currently available. There are 0 conflicting studies that support what you've been saying, I checked. It also explains why you can't post a single source to back up anything you've claimed.

Quote:


I think it's clear you don't understand what it evidence, nor why psychology is a weak science and the studies don't carry much weight. There was that reproducibility crisis a little while ago where over half the research published in psychology could not be verified or reproduced. That and as a field it doesn't really publish null results.




Oh no.. you've made another claim with absolutely nothing to back it up. Shocker.
I mentioned the science is behind. However, these studies will be expanded as the evidence will become more concrete as presented in the "future questions" section of majority of the studies posted.

I've studied psychology along friends who are now PhDs in the field. I am also educated. I wouldn't have passed my school and wouldn't have been a journalist if I didn't understand evidence as it's a required skill in the field..

Quote:


Or to apty quote: "Because psychology often does not meet the five basic requirements for a field to be considered scientifically rigorous: clearly defined terminology, quantifiability, highly controlled experimental conditions, reproducibility and, finally, predictability and testability."

So pretty much their words don't mean that much, especially when it comes to positive and negative thinking which they cannot verify nor prove.




Was that quoted from a study? You need to source your quotes..

There are also parts where they mention how they are working to improve those. Their words mean a lot more than yours. A positive and negative thought isn't rocket science to verify, but you continue believing whatever makes you happy. Except that's why you're here, because you're not happy.

Quote:

No, it's more that everything they gave me didn't work when done. Professional help might as well be quack help. No meds worked, they just made me feel worse than before and none of the tricks they taught me made any difference, but they were more than happy to take my money.




I can't comment on the meds due to my bias, but tricks? You mean life skills and tools like healthy social interaction which you have none? You've treated professional help like you treat everything else, with 0 real effort.

The turnout of your life is no surprise and if you don't make necessary changes in your attitude, nothing will ever change in your life. You are the epitome of cognitive dissonance and the dunning kruger effect and it's probably due to a past trauma.


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


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Invisiblecubedryeguy
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27922385 - 08/28/22 10:49 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
Quote:

cubedryeguy said:
I’ve briefly read over everything being said so I may have missed a lot. With that said I think bringing awareness to the decisions ‘we make’ helps us to choose the best possible outcome. When I’m in a negative mood and have lost my awareness in negative thought loops I will be influenced by emotional habitual responses. This is usually the ‘wrong’ choice. If I’m bringing awareness to the situation and not getting so absorbed into my emotional state and the accompanying thoughts, or vice versa, I make the ‘better’ choice.

This then will lead to a more positive outlook and I’ll notice all of the good that happens to me even though the bad is also still there. I’m just less absorbed in it. It then seems like I’m attracting more positivity into my life, which I am with better decision making, while not being as impacted by the bad events. If this wasn’t so coherent I apologize, I’ve had a �� and a ��




Aren't positive/negative and good and bad not real? I mean they're just opinions, it's not science. You can't attract more positivity or negativity in life because stuff is neutral.





Don’t tell a magnet it’s neutral. You probably have an opinion over which experiences you prefer to have in this life. Once again though it is best not to hold onto any of the experiences, even the ones we label positive. And In order to function within society we label everything, including our emotional states of being. But hey if you can get to a point where you don’t have an opinion over whether you get kissed on the lips or punched in the face then well done.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27922404 - 08/28/22 11:05 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

https://www.uclahealth.org/pac/animal-assisted-therapy




" The results of this pilot study are not generalizable due to the small sample size and lack of randomization"

"Still, the therapeutic approach of using dogs to soothe people’s minds and improve health has
been considered more a “nicety” than credible science,"

And one of those isn't even a scientific study. So yeah, still not in the right there.

Quote:

One study explaining how positive thinkers were something like 13% less likely to get heart disease despite being genetically prone to than negative thinkers with the same predisposition.

If a thought impacts someone's life negatively, it's easily deemed a negative thought. A lot of what I said was infact verified. You cognitively choose to keep being delusional based on your uneducated opinions.




Meaningless as there is no scientific way to measure a positive or negative thinker. They are entirely subjective judgments. What you have measured is not in fact verified and I'm starting to doubt the claims of these studies. I'm surprised they weren't laughed out.

Quote:

Yeah no.. you're not exercising to your full/beneficial potential if you're not doing it for yourself. Feel free to be specific about one of your workouts. That's why a small percentage of people in some of those studies either saw no benefits or even negative effects from exercising and one of the studies highlighted how disinterest in exercise would affect the quality of exercise while also the opposite of too much interest and over exercising. If you don't enjoy any of your workouts, you're doing it wrong. The research did show that. Also, healthy workouts increase the size and strength of the prefrontal cortex and hippocampus which is proven through neural imaging in one of the studies I posted. The prefrontal cortex is responsible for motivation and self efficacy plus a lot of other things. You can stay in denial though. Seems to be a trend for you.




Wrong...again. The research shows nothing about motivation, just the act of doing it. None of the research shows how attitude towards it affects the results of it, you are literally making that up to fit your narrative and to make excuses for why something doesn't work, which makes sense you still buy into the law of attraction. The research shows it can affect mood but it's not a guarantee. At this point it's getting harder to take you seriously.

Quote:

A positive and negative thought isn't rocket science to verify, but you continue believing whatever makes you happy. Except that's why you're here, because you're not happy.




Positive and negative are literally entirely subjective and therefor not testable when it comes to science. That's why studies on positive and negative thoughts are moot.

Quote:

You mean life skills and tools like healthy social interaction which you have none? You've treated professional help like you treat everything else, with 0 real effort.

The turnout of your life is no surprise and if you don't make necessary changes in your attitude, nothing will ever change in your life. You are the epitome of cognitive dissonance and the dunning kruger effect and it's probably due to a past trauma.




Wrong again. None of the skills and methods given to me worked. It's like you enjoy being wrong. I put in the work and the effort and nothing happened, nothing changed. Life's like that sometimes where you can do your best and it isn't good enough. But again since you actually buy into the law of attraction I can't say I'm too confident in your reasoning.


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: cubedryeguy]
    #27922408 - 08/28/22 11:08 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Are you seriously trying to equate the charges on a magnet with value judgments? They aren't even close to make that analogy land.

Yes we make judgments on what is positive and good and what is bad and negative, but that's only to us. Life itself is neutral, nothing is good or bad or positive or negative so it's impossible to attract anything. All you can do is work towards stuff.

That's one (of many) reason the Law of Attraction is bullshit.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27922529 - 08/28/22 12:39 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Have you ever had a boyfriend or girlfriend?


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InvisibleTheStallionMang
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27922549 - 08/28/22 12:49 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

starpig has a bottomless hole to which he asks us to throw down our time and energy in an attempt at getting attention for a problem he has no real interest in resolving


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27922565 - 08/28/22 01:06 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Yes, I had a boyfriend but we grew apart as it became clear that we weren't compatible in a lot of ways. Sexually, worldview, and interests (big part was I liked insects a ton and he...didn't, I liked the ocean and going out into the water snorkeling, he did not), there were other stuff. We got together for nerdy interests. We just weren't on the same wavelength though, it always felt off, and we knew that. So we parted amicably. We're still friends though.


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Invisibler3volution.gurl
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: TheStallionMang]
    #27922574 - 08/28/22 01:14 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

TheStallionMang said:
starpig has a bottomless hole to which he asks us to throw down our time and energy in an attempt at getting attention for a problem he has no real interest in resolving




He's like the kind of person that has a bowl full of delicious white rice and because a single grain is overcooked or not to his liking he rather throw the whole bowl out and claim the rice is shit.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27922578 - 08/28/22 01:19 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Saying wrong with just cherry picking studies given to you for a clear reason and no data to back it up has absolutely no credibility.

You're incapable of looking at bigger pictures and the value of overall information, let alone what it means.

You have a clear bias towards psychology.
You also aren't a credible source to determine the amount of effort you think you put in vs what you actually put in.

The research showed very clearly the benefits to the prefrontal cortex, but your lack of effort and bias prevents you from understanding what that means in regards to self efficacy(motivation).

I'm done arguing with you because you just waste people's time including mine. You haven't proven a single thing and you also don't know the difference between a concept, study and blog article.


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


Edited by r3volution.gurl (08/28/22 01:24 PM)


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27922621 - 08/28/22 02:02 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Not true at all.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27922633 - 08/28/22 02:14 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

r3volution.gurl said:
Saying wrong with just cherry picking studies given to you for a clear reason and no data to back it up has absolutely no credibility.

You're incapable of looking at bigger pictures and the value of overall information, let alone what it means.

You have a clear bias towards psychology.
You also aren't a credible source to determine the amount of effort you think you put in vs what you actually put in.

The research showed very clearly the benefits to the prefrontal cortex, but your lack of effort and bias prevents you from understanding what that means in regards to self efficacy(motivation).

I'm done arguing with you because you just waste people's time including mine. You haven't proven a single thing and you also don't know the difference between a concept, study and blog article.




It's not a bias it's the very clear and obvious holes in the field. Ever since the reproducibility crisis the field has been floundering to be seen as legitimate. Not to mention being limited by what it's able to see and relying on self-reports when it can't. No other field has had over HALF of it's major findings being unable to be reproduced.

And I already explained why studies on positive and negative thinking are fundamentally flawed.

Also, again, you fail to even understand the basic fact that exercise only CAN affect it, it's not a sure thing. That's why every research shows CAN or MIGHT under what you listed, it's not certain and when it comes to psychology even less so.

If anyone can't see the bigger picture here it's you, who seems to think that if something doesn't work it's the person's fault (which is classic trait of people who buy into the law of attraction). You fail to see the flaw in any study that researches positive and negative thinking, namely there is no objective measure of such things and there is no way to verify it. Self reports don't cut it you need actual data that isn't subject to reporting bias. So, you haven't proven anything, at all.

You're stuck in "Citation" mode that you aren't able to think critically about the studies.

But then again this is what I expected more or less from someone who actually buys into the law of attraction which is known to be BS and has been disproven several times.

It doesn't matter what a psychological study says because it ultimately boils down to asking the person "did it work"? IF they say NO, then you have to accept it (especially since all your evidence in the studies is more or less self reporting). It's not like "real" science where you can measure the physiological changes and the count of a virus or bacterial and other more credible evidence. No, all you have to fall back on in psychology is their answer. It doesn't matter what the brain scans say if they still report feeling the same and no improvement or if something doesn't work. All those scans show is that it worked for those people.

Sadly when it comes to psychology findings cannot be universally applied and testing for it in a lab is poor because you can't really pin down the exact condition or mental factor.

But sure I'M the one who can't see the big picture, but then again I expected as much from you.

EDIT: Oh, and exercise doesn't boost mood when it comes to depression and other serious illnesses so again, still wrong there. I'm also fairly sure you didn't read any of these since the actual data blows holes in your point. Namely exercising for only a week isn't nearly enough to measure changes. ALso that the attitude impacting it isn't true, especially since the study was only 10 people and didn't control for anything.

You have to actually THINK about the studies not just mindlessly spit them out.


Edited by starpig (08/28/22 02:28 PM)


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27922770 - 08/28/22 03:50 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
:blah:




You'll just say anything to continue your delusions.

I've clearly stated the science is behind and even the studies themselves explained why, mostly due to equipment, in lab environments, test groups etc. I never once denied this. It's just a matter of time before these studies excel to what they've basically already found neurologically. You are arguing nothing except your perception of reality. You're ignorant to what those studies accomplished because of your bias and that actually means it is you not critically thinking and you're projecting on to me for whatever negative reason. I'm aware of everything you argued and it's cherry picked info to form a false overall consensus, I read the studies or I wouldn't have posted them.

There isn't a way to measure a lot of things, but they still exist despite being subjective. You are full of excuses and literal bullshit that no sane person on the planet can honestly tolerate or it would start negatively affecting them.

You should ask your parents or try to remember if you've had a minor fall/head injury as a baby or child because something is seriously wrong with you or you have unresolved trauma that shaped your personality to an extremely dislikable individual.

I've had my fair share of people not liking me on shroomery, but I think you've surpassed anyone because I'd never ask for help and then argue with anyone trying to help, let alone every single person trying to help. Learn to fucking say thanks and stfu whether you decide to listen/take someone's advice or not. You have no healthy social skills whatsoever and you reap what you sow, as the saying goes.


Edited by r3volution.gurl (08/28/22 04:02 PM)


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Offlinestarpig
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27922795 - 08/28/22 04:11 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

No, I say this as someone majored in psychology it's not as solid as people think.

And when the advice you get is what you already know and tried and didn't work then it's moot. Or just outright terrible advice like moving to a new country you don't know the language too with no money or a passport.

I've already explained why your studies don't matter. Because ultimately people are unique and just because something worked on someone (and again they use MAY a lot in your links) doesn't mean it works for everyone. Unfortunately, that's what psychology boils down to. That's why exercise doesn't work for everyone and can even make things worse, why therapy stands at around 50% effectiveness, etc.

It's also why reproducing experiments is poor in the field.

It's not my fault you can't accept that. Ultimately if it doesn't work for someone then it DOESN'T WORK. And no amount of you blaming the victim for not "Doing it right" is going to change that.

At this point you're not thinking like science you're thinking like religion.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27922985 - 08/28/22 06:28 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

I never claimed psychology was solid.

Also, that person never said to not have a passport.

Please stop embarrassing yourself.

The reason nothing helps you is because you won't actually help yourself. Things don't magically happen on their own. Therapy or working out doesn't magically benefit you because you're there half assing in a bid to fix yourself. It's not instant. It takes dedication and discipline long term, both which you've proven you don't have based on your low effort here alone and getting bored of everything within a week.

I am highly skeptical you majored in anything let alone psychology:lol: You couldn't decipher between a blog article and a study, plus you cherry pick information to support bias. You behaved  with the exact same expertise about therapy animals and I know for a fact I am more educated than you on animal behaviour so it's evident you behave this way on every topic. If you're not badmouthing something, you just lost interest in it.

I'm not religious at all and it's ironic the person who can't post a single source except talk out of their ass would say that, but keep making excuses for your shitty low effort behaviour. I've read you like a book. You're getting exactly what you deserve in life and until you realize that, nothing will ever help you, help yourself.

People in your life tell you the same things over and over because you have not really done them. You just believe you have. People eventually see that you're not really putting the effort you're supposed to and they make a concious choice for themselves to stay away from a person who is lying to themselves, never mind being argumentative about it and that's why you have no consistent healthy relationships.

You're probably also narcissistic. I would know.

And you're not as bright as you think you are if you spend a whole bunch of money on something you just got into knowing deep down you will probably lose interest. It's impulsive behaviour which represents immaturity or an instant gratification habit.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27923034 - 08/28/22 06:48 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
Are you seriously trying to equate the charges on a magnet with value judgments? They aren't even close to make that analogy land.

Yes we make judgments on what is positive and good and what is bad and negative, but that's only to us. Life itself is neutral, nothing is good or bad or positive or negative so it's impossible to attract anything. All you can do is work towards stuff.

That's one (of many) reason the Law of Attraction is bullshit.



 
No I wasn’t trying to equate a magnet to value judgments however you said ‘stuff’ is neutral. A magnet is stuff. Also I’m not supporting or denying the law of attraction.

Positive life decisions will lead to positive outcomes, at least a better outcome than would otherwise occur.  How we interact and talk with others influences the results we get. You can call it attracting positive outcomes if you want but as long as the results are the same what’s the harm in labeling it?


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: cubedryeguy]
    #27923169 - 08/28/22 08:58 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Because there aren't positive or negative life decisions there are simply decisions. Whatever happens after that is based on one's judgment. A "positive" decision can have a "negative" outcome. You can't know until after the fact.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27923213 - 08/28/22 09:31 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

The reason nothing helps you is because you won't actually help yourself. Things don't magically happen on their own. Therapy or working out doesn't magically benefit you because you're there half assing in a bid to fix yourself. It's not instant. It takes dedication and discipline long term, both which you've proven you don't have based on your low effort here alone and getting bored of everything within a week.




Or maybe it doesn't work because these are all mays and CANs.

Quote:

I am highly skeptical you majored in anything let alone psychology:lol: You couldn't decipher between a blog article and a study, plus you cherry pick information to support bias. You behaved  with the exact same expertise about therapy animals and I know for a fact I am more educated than you on animal behaviour so it's evident you behave this way on every topic. If you're not badmouthing something, you just lost interest in it.




Doubtful given what you posted about it.

Quote:

I'm not religious at all and it's ironic the person who can't post a single source except talk out of their ass would say that, but keep making excuses for your shitty low effort behaviour. I've read you like a book. You're getting exactly what you deserve in life and until you realize that, nothing will ever help you, help yourself.

People in your life tell you the same things over and over because you have not really done them. You just believe you have. People eventually see that you're not really putting the effort you're supposed to and they make a concious choice for themselves to stay away from a person who is lying to themselves, never mind being argumentative about it and that's why you have no consistent healthy relationships.




Not true, people don't get what they deserve in life, life just happens and we deal with it. If people say the same thing its because that's all they know and don't know what to do when it doesn't work.

It would honestly take too long to explain how you're wrong in this instance so I'll leave it at that.

Quote:

You're probably also narcissistic. I would know.




BAsed on your posts that seems unlikely.

Quote:

And you're not as bright as you think you are if you spend a whole bunch of money on something you just got into knowing deep down you will probably lose interest. It's impulsive behaviour which represents immaturity or an instant gratification habit.




Again, not really.


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Offlineashfiken
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27923665 - 08/29/22 08:17 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
A lot of evidence and experiences from others show that the results are mixed. From what I got it mostly just reinforces what you already believe. In any case it doesn’t make you more interesting or give a personality.




From what you got?.
Wrong.
Reinforce? No.
How about make you question everything you ever thought you knew. And trying to be forced to swallow new truths as you see them?
It def makes you more interesting, to split your mind open, be vulnerable, and take your chances at seeing something most don't get to see.
Maybe you will learn. To listen. That would benefit your personality. Listen and believe ppl instead of "what you got" from some miserable experience you've 'not' even had.


--------------------
hmm...

"I'm naked and fearless... And my fear is naked."

"life isn't worth living without the threat of death"

"I got my plans in a ziploc bag, let's see how unproductive we can be"

"nobody lives their lives fully except for bull fighters"

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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27923727 - 08/29/22 09:09 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

:whateveryousayfreak:

I didn't say people get what they deserve. I specifically said you.

Majority of people with pets alone have more knowledge and experience than you. I don't even need my training experience to surpass you because of all the animals I've cared for in my life and amazing relationships I've had with them.

Anyone can read these studies and easily see what you've been claiming is only your cherry picked perception of reality. Including the topic of therapy dogs.

Quote:

...the findings across the human neuroimaging studies indicate that increases in aerobic fitness, derived from physical activity participation, is related to improvements in the integrity of brain structure and function, and may underlie improvements in cognition across tasks requiring top-down cognitive control. It should be noted that, to date, all neuroimaging research examining the role of fitness on brain and cognition has employed older adults. Future research endeavors need to consider earlier periods of the human lifespan to better determine the underlying mechanisms for the beneficial relation of fitness to behavioral performance in children and young adults. Regardless, these findings utilize some of the most sophisticated techniques available to image the human brain and have advance the knowledge base on the relation of physical activity to brain and cognition.




https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3951958/

I'm a narcissist, so again, I would know.


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


Edited by r3volution.gurl (08/29/22 09:15 AM)


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27923748 - 08/29/22 09:25 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Jesus starpig, I thought I was cynical LOL


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: ashfiken]
    #27923752 - 08/29/22 09:29 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

It actually doesn’t. Proof of that is the there are “nazi” groups today that use them, and they’re about as terrible as you can get. Also pretty sure Manson and his “family” did them and look how that turned out as did some cults in that time period. Aztecs did them too and they sacrificed people on an alter.

They don’t make you question everything or force you to swallow any truths. They are what you make of them essentially. That’s why people of faiths who take them end up seeing whatever version of spiritual their faith teaches.

I’ve know people who have taken them and remained unchanged. It’s really not what you make it out to be. And it definitely doesn’t make you more interesting but it can certainly lead you to believe you are.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27923757 - 08/29/22 09:31 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Anyone reading these can see you lack the acumen to evaluate them critically.

I’ve already told you what psychology ultimately boils down to. Also that exercise isn’t a guarantee for helping someone. The point remains if it doesn’t work it doesn’t work no matter what study you cite. People are individuals and that’s what makes psychology unreliable. You can’t control for everything and when it comes to human brains and minds it’s not one size for all or even most.

You clearly understand nothing.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27923765 - 08/29/22 09:34 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Have you done mushrooms before?

You are not a reliable source for what psychology boils down to. So you can say whatever you like. It means diddly squat to me.

We've also established critical thinking involves objective analysis and evaluation. You've evidently done the complete opposite with not only our topic, but every topic anyone brings up.


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl] * 1
    #27923889 - 08/29/22 11:06 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

We've also established critical thinking involves objective analysis and evaluation. You've evidently done the complete opposite with not only our topic, but every topic anyone brings up.




Not quite. The first step in it is seeing there isn’t such a thing as objectivity. And again you brought up law of attraction so you’re not really in a place to lecture someone else about it.

And yes I have done them before, it wasn’t a big deal since I didn’t make a thing of it.

Quote:

You are not a reliable source for what psychology boils down to. So you can say whatever you like. It means diddly squat to me.




I’m only parroting what the field says. It ultimately boils down to whether it’s working on/for the person. If it’s jot then it’s not and you have to try something else. That’s science, which is why I said you’re practicing religion here insisting it’s THEIR fault for it not working. Pretty sure doctors don’t blame a patient for meds not working if they’re taking them.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27924166 - 08/29/22 02:13 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
Not quite. The first step in it is seeing there isn’t such a thing as objectivity. And again you brought up law of attraction so you’re not really in a place to lecture someone else about it.




Objective to your best ability. You keep arguing about subjective terms. These concepts still exist, again you keep pretending your perception of reality is factual. You mentioned critical thinking and you used it incorrectly if you believe objectivity doesn't exist at all. You've contradicted yourself... again.

I brought law of attraction up because it's obvious your thoughts are the only real problem in your life. You have no control over them and you make an excuse for it by claiming no one does. People wouldn't be able to meditate if that was even remotely true.

Quote:


And yes I have done them before, it wasn’t a big deal since I didn’t make a thing of it.




How many grams?

Quote:

I’m only parroting what the field says. It ultimately boils down to whether it’s working on/for the person. If it’s jot then it’s not and you have to try something else. That’s science, which is why I said you’re practicing religion here insisting it’s THEIR fault for it not working. Pretty sure doctors don’t blame a patient for meds not working if they’re taking them.




You're parroting what you choose to. You ignore so much information to come to your judgements. You don't represent science when you cherry pick data. It's not science, it's bias. I'm not religious at all(like I've already said) and I don't need to use the term law of attraction to get my point across that you are the problem in your life. I used it because I genuinely didn't think you were this delusional and pessimistic. The signs were there though, but I always want to give someone the benefit of the doubt. 

I can't ever know the actual effort you put in. You left out a ton of important details regarding the so called effort you put in. Any details you gave were regarding everything else and the fact it didn't work when you "tried" it.


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27924606 - 08/29/22 07:11 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

I brought law of attraction up because it's obvious your thoughts are the only real problem in your life. You have no control over them and you make an excuse for it by claiming no one does. People wouldn't be able to meditate if that was even remotely true.





Uhh no one has control over their thoughts, that's the first thing you learn in meditation. The whole point is to change your relationship to your thoughts. If you think meditation is about controlling thoughts -mod edit-.

Quote:

How many grams?




Doesn't matter.

Quote:

You're parroting what you choose to. You ignore so much information to come to your judgements. You don't represent science when you cherry pick data. It's not science, it's bias. I'm not religious at all(like I've already said) and I don't need to use the term law of attraction to get my point across that you are the problem in your life. I used it because I genuinely didn't think you were this delusional and pessimistic. The signs were there though, but I always want to give someone the benefit of the doubt.

I can't ever know the actual effort you put in. You left out a ton of important details regarding the so called effort you put in. Any details you gave were regarding everything else and the fact it didn't work when you "tried" it.




You're also cherry picking so where does it leave us. Ultimately when it comes to science if a method doesn't work it doesn't matter what the research says you have to pivot and figure out what's going on.

That's all you're really gonna get. In my case consistent effort and doing the work yielded ZERO results, so I'm just tired at this point. Tired of trying and having nothing to show for it. I can't hold onto hope forever, it hurts too much.


Edited by LogicaL Chaos (08/29/22 07:51 PM)


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27924716 - 08/29/22 08:02 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
Uhh no one has control over their thoughts, that's the first thing you learn in meditation. The whole point is to change your relationship to your thoughts. If you think meditation is about controlling thoughts, you're an idiot.




Changing your relationship with your thoughts is for the purpose of having more control of your thoughts..

Quote:

Doesn't matter.




It really does matter, different doses provide different experiences.

Quote:

You're also cherry picking so where does it leave us.




I really haven't... I wouldn't have posted any of those studies if I didn't factor in all the information which is why I mentioned why the research is behind. It leaves us with self reflection really. I feel guilty for arguing with you because it was a waste of both our time. I also made a mistake posting in this thread and not reading the signs that you're looking for something that doesn't exist and probably never will because instant gratification for long term results is practically impossible.

Quote:

Ultimately when it comes to science if a method doesn't work it doesn't matter what the research says you have to pivot and figure out what's going on. That's all you're really gonna get. In my case consistent effort and doing the work yielded ZERO results, so I'm just tired at this point. Tired of trying and having nothing to show for it. I can't hold onto hope forever, it hurts too much.




Ah, sure, whatever consistent effort and doing the work means to you(I genuinely don't know). I'm sorry I couldn't help you figure out this baffling mystery. I want to say maybe someone will, but it clearly has to be you that figures it out.


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27924957 - 08/29/22 10:37 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

I'm tired of seeking help and trying it only for it to not end up working out. It's exhausting and draining. I can't take more disappointment and as I mentioned just holding on to hope hurts more than I can bear some days. I want to give up but part of me won't let me.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27925050 - 08/30/22 12:30 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Well, at least you've been interested in this thread for more than a week...


--------------------


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27925418 - 08/30/22 08:30 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
It actually doesn’t. Proof of that is the there are “nazi” groups today that use them, and they’re about as terrible as you can get. Also pretty sure Manson and his “family” did them and look how that turned out as did some cults in that time period. Aztecs did them too and they sacrificed people on an alter.

They don’t make you question everything or force you to swallow any truths. They are what you make of them essentially. That’s why people of faiths who take them end up seeing whatever version of spiritual their faith teaches.

I’ve know people who have taken them and remained unchanged. It’s really not what you make it out to be. And it definitely doesn’t make you more interesting but it can certainly lead you to believe you are.





Lololol
Just bc nazis use them makes them not what they are? Dude you are really starting to show what a piece of work you are ND why you feel alone and without personality or whatever.
Yeah some ppl don't change bc that wasn't their plan, or they weren't focused, or didn't know how to change or what was needed from them.
They are what you make them bc faiths
lmfao.
You know nothing.
Many ppl with traditional belief systems , take psyches and it CHALLENGES those belief systems not reinforce.
Aren't we looking for things to grant a possibility at things YOU want?
So it's what YOU make it right? So make it fulfill the needs that I KNOW they can for .YOU.
You make definite claims about shit you know zero about and have zero experience.
Except what you saw or watched or whatever. This is now a joke to me. If you don't want to try to make something of your life quit asking for a way how.

Experiences make you interesting to others(big shocker) so in fact, psychedelic experiences would do that as well, as much as you like to think it's just the individual believing it, you are again dead wrong and will forever be wrong as long as you take your own dumbass conclusions,  and clutch to them and spew them for others, that know better to read and laugh about.


--------------------
hmm...

"I'm naked and fearless... And my fear is naked."

"life isn't worth living without the threat of death"

"I got my plans in a ziploc bag, let's see how unproductive we can be"

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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: ashfiken]
    #27925543 - 08/30/22 09:45 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Many ppl with traditional belief systems , take psyches and it CHALLENGES those belief systems not reinforce.
Aren't we looking for things to grant a possibility at things YOU want?




Wrong there bud. It doesn’t do that and there is plenty of evidence to show that. Nazis groups today are just one. A lot of far right groups do it too.

https://www.psymposia.com/magazine/lucy-in-the-sky-with-nazis-psychedelics-and-the-right-wing/

Quote:

Experiences make you interesting to others(big shocker) so in fact, psychedelic experiences would do that as well, as much as you like to think it's just the individual believing it, you are again dead wrong and will forever be wrong as long as you take your own dumbass conclusions,  and clutch to them and spew them for others, that know better to read and laugh about.





Psychedelic experiences don’t make you interesting, and you are sort of proving my point. People have an experience and think it means something profound but that’s not true. So many contradictory examples of psychedelics show that it’s not a set outcome but more a dice roll. Their power and impact is also overblown as the don’t have the power to make you question everything. You are doing that on your own, you just attribute it to the drug.

But no, those experiences don’t make you interesting anything more than smoking weed makes you interesting. Though you might think you are.

Quote:

Yeah some ppl don't change bc that wasn't their plan, or they weren't focused, or didn't know how to change or what was needed from them.




Sounds like excuses you can’t prove when your claims are shown to be false. No true Scotsman Fallacy at its finest. Face it, they aren’t what you think they are nor do they have the power you claim they do.


Edited by starpig (08/30/22 09:48 AM)


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27925558 - 08/30/22 09:56 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

So one link is plenty of evidence? which just backs the one instance you spoke of to begin with?
One use case for some hateful shit doesn't mean it doesn't have 1000 other use cases.
Dude ppl use guns to both kill humans and feed themselves.

Nothing "MAKES YOU INTERESTING."
Experiences, make you SEEM interesting to others. Do you get this idea?

I'm not trying to be interesting for myself , I'm trying to bring ppl into my circle , having experiences to talk about, creates common ground and also makes ppl INTERESTED to both listen, hear, understand, and share their own with you.

Interesting isn't objective in value.
It's subjective.


--------------------
hmm...

"I'm naked and fearless... And my fear is naked."

"life isn't worth living without the threat of death"

"I got my plans in a ziploc bag, let's see how unproductive we can be"

"nobody lives their lives fully except for bull fighters"

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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27925567 - 08/30/22 10:02 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:


Sounds like excuses you can’t prove when your claims are shown to be false. No true Scotsman Fallacy at its finest. Face it, they aren’t what you think they are nor do they have the power you claim they do.





Lmfao you edited your post on a psychedelic based website to say this??
I never claimed magic powers fam
I said they may make you more interesting to others.
You know absolutely nothing. And also I know very little.
However they are what I think they are, and they have whatever power someone is willing to give them, unlike you, refusing to attempt, and refusing to understand anything about the world that you haven't read once
What I claim is they can do more for you then you will allow.
There will plenty of instances in the future of ppl benefitting from them, just bc you are scared and refuse to listen to anything except to refute it with one point or one thing or whatever. You are insufferable


--------------------
hmm...

"I'm naked and fearless... And my fear is naked."

"life isn't worth living without the threat of death"

"I got my plans in a ziploc bag, let's see how unproductive we can be"

"nobody lives their lives fully except for bull fighters"

My Trade List


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: ashfiken]
    #27925576 - 08/30/22 10:11 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

It’s not one case. They literally list the other contradictions. And that’s not even all of them. They don’t have the effect you seem to think that they do and there are documented instances showing as much. I’m sure I could dig even further but if you won’t accept even these then it’s a moot point.

It sounds to me like you want others to confirm your worldview rather than admit that maybe it’s not accurate. Just because you and others had experiences doesn’t really mean anything nor does it say anything about the drugs. Humans have a habit for pattern recognition and making meaning, so it’s not surprising you thought the experience meant anything.

But you’re also wrong that having similar experiences makes other want to listen and share with you.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: ashfiken]
    #27925579 - 08/30/22 10:15 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

However they are what I think they are, and they have whatever power someone is willing to give them, unlike you, refusing to attempt, and refusing to understand anything about the world that you haven't read once
What I claim is they can do more for you then you will allow.
There will plenty of instances in the future of ppl benefitting from them, just bc you are scared and refuse to listen to anything except to refute it with one point or one thing or whatever. You are insufferable




No they aren’t as I already showed and you refused to accept. There are also plenty of instances of violent cultures that used them in the last.

It’s got nothing to do with what one will allow (another excuse to avoid accepting reality).

What WILL happen in the future is the same mixed results you see today and in the past. It’s not my fault you want to deny reality. You remind me of those religious types who come up with so many excuses when evidence contradicts their worldview.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27925635 - 08/30/22 10:48 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

My worldview hasn't been posited here as that was not the discussion. It was how you may become more interesting to others.

Excuses?
I need no excuses for my experience.
If you don't want to explore for yourself that's on you.

And similar experiences don't bring ppl together?
Yeah I can take the word of someone that can't socialize on that one huh?
Even though that is dead opposite of how humans interact.
If I climb mountain x in a given region, and you climb mountain y, I would be interested to hear your experience, and I'd share mine.
You simply don't want to get how humans work and interact.
All this I've laid for you as my experience is not about world view or the power of psyches its about getting you out there and able to connect with other humans.
But you don't want that, you want to point out how nothing works, and how infallible any possible avenue for outreach is and how it would never change anything for you, sorry to say you just don't want what you are claiming to want. It works in different ways for others , but not how they think it's working , according to you, or whatever.  But If you refuse any way then you might as well resign to no personality whatever living, arguing with ppl about their experiences and how it can't possibly work that way or work for you.


--------------------
hmm...

"I'm naked and fearless... And my fear is naked."

"life isn't worth living without the threat of death"

"I got my plans in a ziploc bag, let's see how unproductive we can be"

"nobody lives their lives fully except for bull fighters"

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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl] * 3
    #27925668 - 08/30/22 11:19 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

OP is clearly trolling

Solid read on the character being presented and solid replies

Hot and smart... ::wellhellothere:


--------------------
.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: ashfiken]
    #27925693 - 08/30/22 11:43 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Even though that is dead opposite of how humans interact.
If I climb mountain x in a given region, and you climb mountain y, I would be interested to hear your experience, and I'd share mine.




Keyword being I in there. You aren’t everyone. Just because people share similar experiences doesn’t mean they want to hear about yours. Doesn’t work out that way exactly.

Quote:

You simply don't want to get how humans work and interact.
All this I've laid for you as my experience is not about world view or the power of psyches its about getting you out there and able to connect with other humans.
But you don't want that, you want to point out how nothing works, and how infallible any possible avenue for outreach is and how it would never change anything for you, sorry to say you just don't want what you are claiming to want. It works in different ways for others , but not how they think it's working , according to you, or whatever.  But If you refuse any way then you might as well resign to no personality whatever living, arguing with ppl about their experiences and how it can't possibly work that way or work for you.




I likely know more than you. For the most part I can get how they interact but it’s not always as you say. People can have similar interests or experiences and not give a shit about what other people did or went through. Happens all the time.

What you’ve said I’ve heard before, tried several times, failed each one. Next.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27925756 - 08/30/22 12:31 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

OP is really starting to sounds like this guy:
abigherdofturd posts
and I'm sure some will remember him.  No matter what good advice is given, there was resistance and an inability to consider anything anyone said as valuable

There is no helping some people and this seems to be another case of an energy vampire wasting well intentioned peoples' time

OP, consider the possibility that you simply suck and will live your life in relative solitude and boredom.  It's not such a bad thing but fighting it isn't worth the trouble it causes
:leocheers:


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: TheStallionMang]
    #27925784 - 08/30/22 12:47 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

I literally explained how you were wrong about me and you keep doing it anyway.

You say well intentioned and good advice but none has been given. I already explained how it’s been done before several times and doesn’t work and instead the solution is to just keep saying it as thought that’s gonna make it true.

You don’t listen do you?


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Masked] * 2
    #27925799 - 08/30/22 12:54 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Masked said:
OP is clearly trolling

Solid read on the character being presented and solid replies

Hot and smart... ::wellhellothere:




:wave:

Thanks, how you been? Hope all is well!


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Masked]
    #27925839 - 08/30/22 01:16 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

More like far from the truth


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27925863 - 08/30/22 01:31 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
You don’t listen do you?




Project much?


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl] * 2
    #27925921 - 08/30/22 02:20 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

I've been not to shabby thanx :hug:

Just doing the normal middle age family man stuff.  Grinding my shift work, reading books, working on my chess study, hanging with the fam.  Watching tv.  And been getting errands around my new house done

Just got back from a camping trip out in the middle of nowhere.



--------------------
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Masked] * 1
    #27926029 - 08/30/22 03:34 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Masked said:
I've been not to shabby thanx :hug:

Just doing the normal middle age family man stuff.  Grinding my shift work, reading books, working on my chess study, hanging with the fam.  Watching tv.  And been getting errands around my new house done

Just got back from a camping trip out in the middle of nowhere.






:coolpost:
Amazing! Damn that province is beautiful.


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl] * 1
    #27926061 - 08/30/22 03:47 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Thx!  Ya it is pretty raw.  And i take my tent trailer off the beaten path, so it is always very remote and secluded.  No one around and entire campsite, lake and outhouse to myself lol :thumbup:


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: TheStallionMang]
    #27926082 - 08/30/22 03:53 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Not really, I already explained why your assessment of me as someone who doesn't get out much is just...false.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Masked] * 1
    #27929982 - 09/02/22 01:30 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Masked said:
I've been not to shabby thanx :hug:

Just doing the normal middle age family man stuff.  Grinding my shift work, reading books, working on my chess study, hanging with the fam.  Watching tv.  And been getting errands around my new house done

Just got back from a camping trip out in the middle of nowhere.






This is a much better use of this thread, looks like your camping trip was awesome!!  I'm going camping at the end of the month with a bucnh of people, going to take about 5 large jars of mushrooms to share and have us all our troubles melt away.


--------------------


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: schpat] * 1
    #27930106 - 09/02/22 05:27 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

schpat said:
Quote:

Masked said:
I've been not to shabby thanx :hug:

Just doing the normal middle age family man stuff.  Grinding my shift work, reading books, working on my chess study, hanging with the fam.  Watching tv.  And been getting errands around my new house done

Just got back from a camping trip out in the middle of nowhere.






This is a much better use of this thread, looks like your camping trip was awesome!!  I'm going camping at the end of the month with a bucnh of people, going to take about 5 large jars of mushrooms to share and have us all our troubles melt away.




These pics evoked the same thing in me. I just locked in a weekend away in nature with a jar of fruits. Can't wait to hit the reset button


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27930440 - 09/02/22 10:59 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Is it much of a reset? Sounds more like running away


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27930441 - 09/02/22 11:01 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

:unimpressed:


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: TheStallionMang]
    #27930450 - 09/02/22 11:06 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

It’s generally a lack of mental fortitude to escape to nature.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27930498 - 09/02/22 11:51 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
It’s generally a lack of mental fortitude to escape to nature.




It's not an escape, it's a return to nature

:singletear:


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27930524 - 09/02/22 12:05 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Ignored and hid thread
This shit is ridiculous


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: r3volution.gurl]
    #27930632 - 09/02/22 01:17 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

But everything is already nature. You can’t return to someplace you never left.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27930647 - 09/02/22 01:30 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

If that's how you feel then your point about escaping makes no sense.


--------------------

"Souls love. Thats what souls do. Egos dont, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and youll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And dont leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies: its all one. Its one energy." -Ram Dass


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OfflineLogicaL ChaosM
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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27930655 - 09/02/22 01:35 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
But everything is already nature. You can’t return to someplace you never left.




City or suburban life is nothing like Nature. Its more Humanity changing Nature for its own use. Parking lots with a few trees is a great example. Have u never been to a National Park?


--------------------
"What you must understand is that your physical dimension affects everyone in the higher dimensions as well. All things are interconnected. All things are One. Therefore, if one dimension is broken or out of balance, then all other dimensions will experience repercussions." - Pleiadian Prophecy 2020 The New Golden Age by James Carwin

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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: LogicaL Chaos]
    #27930680 - 09/02/22 01:53 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

“Nature” is just some arbitrary distinction humanity made. I have been to a national park but trees and lakes and mountains are no less natural than cities, cars computers, etc.

You are imagining the idealized picture humans have of nature. The arbitrary distinction that only exists in your head.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27930725 - 09/02/22 02:15 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
Is it much of a reset?




Yes it is. 

Quote:

starpig said:
Sounds more like running away




We won't be running away to the camping spot, that would be ridiculous to run away carrying all that food and gear. It's over 200km from where we live. We will drive away.

Do you not own a car? Do you enjoy running?


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27930825 - 09/02/22 03:27 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

I do enjoy running but I don't do it because then I'll miss everything along the way or might step on a bug. So I just walk everywhere.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27930846 - 09/02/22 03:42 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
I do enjoy running but I don't do it because then I'll miss everything along the way or might step on a bug. So I just walk everywhere.




Yeah I hate bugs too. This week I had the pest guy come around to spray for bugs and spiders. Bit pricey but it kills every insect on the property and keeps killing them for six months. I never have to step on em because they die before I can see em. You should look into it. Usually they can supply a free quote over the phone


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27931131 - 09/02/22 06:40 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

I think you misunderstand. I love bugs so I walk so I don't kill them. In my house I catch them and put them outside, even roaches.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27931175 - 09/02/22 07:12 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
I think you misunderstand. I love bugs so I walk so I don't kill them. In my house I catch them and put them outside, even roaches.



Interesting.
Why would you put them outside if you love them so much?


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27931185 - 09/02/22 07:20 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Because otherwise they’ll die inside the house


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27931530 - 09/02/22 11:37 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Why would they die inside the house? Have you already had the pest guy come around and spray?


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27931546 - 09/02/22 11:53 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Your troll of a troll is entertaining

Discrete enough to get him to bite, but with just enough ridiculousness so that once he does, we can all chuckle

:raisemyglass:


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27931821 - 09/03/22 08:07 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

No they can’t get food or hunt well in the house. They’ll starve to death.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27932404 - 09/03/22 03:18 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Maybe they enter the house because it is just another part of nature and their habitat. Like you said, "Nature” is just some arbitrary distinction humanity made. Maybe they know exactly what they're doing and you're just fucking with their ecosystem and you're actually taking them out of the situation they've put themselves in.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27932406 - 09/03/22 03:19 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Really brings up the question.

Who are you to play God?


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27933301 - 09/04/22 09:07 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Not really. Looking at insect behavior and animals in general they tend to not know what they’re doing when not outdoors. When I’m a building birds tend to fly up when you try to help even if the exit is down. Same with other flying insects. They don’t know you’re trying to help so they act on instinct but instinct doesn’t help in an unfamiliar environment.

Yes it’s all nature but the thing about nature is that animals are adapted to specific environments. Adaptation takes lifetimes to trigger and in our modern world the environment has shifted dramatically which tends to lead to fatality to animals that aren’t adapted to it. Same would happen for any major shift in the world. Though this environment now requires reasoning ability a lot of animals simply don’t have.

So in the case of insects I want to put them in a position they can do something about give their ability. Like when a grasshopper flew into my house, I caught it and put it out. It doesn’t know better, it’s just acting. It doesn’t know there is no food and it doesn’t truly know the way out.

I’ve done this enough to understand more or less their behavior in regards to being human environments and how I’ll adapted they are to them, well certain species.

It is all nature but not everything can survive everywhere. So perhaps, also being part of nature, compassion for animals and insects also is some adaptation to enable their survival given our terraforming so to speak, or not, who knows.

Though I do find the expression “playing god” adorable, as if we have any idea of what god is like to even have that make sense. Let alone the fact that the universe doesn’t give a shit whether you do or don’t . All there are are actions and consequences. Trying to moralize that is small minded.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27933317 - 09/04/22 09:30 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Starpig, what you have just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27933374 - 09/04/22 10:13 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Yeah I didn’t really expect you to understand. But one must still try.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig]
    #27933472 - 09/04/22 10:58 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

It must get tiring having to explain everything to everyone all day, everyday. Your employees must be grateful to work for someone with so much knowledge about everything.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27933478 - 09/04/22 11:01 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Well most at least get where I’m coming from. I can’t say I understand what it’s like to be you, dismissing things they don’t understand as irrational.

Then again given your off base analysis of me I understand. Which is what makes your reply predictable


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27933495 - 09/04/22 11:12 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Markamello said:
Starpig, what you have just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it.



This is a well known quote from an old Adam Sandler movie. I didnt dismiss it as being irrational. It was joke.

I haven't made an analysis of you. I don't know you. All I know about you is that your boyfriend dumped you, you have no friends, you don't have any personality and you know a lot about everything.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27933501 - 09/04/22 11:15 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Just another example of how you don’t understand let alone pay attention. Neither of us dumped each other we just parted ways. It sucks but it happens, we weren’t right for each other.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27933535 - 09/04/22 11:40 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

The writing is on the wall mate and we can all read between the lines.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: Markamello]
    #27933665 - 09/04/22 01:17 PM (1 year, 4 months ago)

This "we" sounds like just you mate.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27935242 - 09/05/22 11:46 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Ok, you know what screw this. I'm done being a briar patch to people.

It is too late to say this, given bridges I burned, but I'd rather do this now and see what come of this than allow this cycle to continue. If I can find the words.

I'm not gonna excuse my actions or what I said. I'm angry, angry and lonely and tired of the same thing each day. Of being alone every weekend, of never having anything I can talk or confide in, and further than that no one to hold. I'm so lonely that it burns sometimes inside my chest and it's all I can to fight to not off myself because some small part of me wants what is due, what I deserve, which I guess is happiness. Some greater part of me resists any attempt to be happy for reasons I have no idea about. And I guess seeing other people happy and well-adjusted burns so much that I want them to meet with harm just to kick them down. Thank God it never got past just thinking it.

It's been years since I've felt good things so I guess I have no idea what that life would look like for me. It's currently beyond my imagination, me being happy, impossible even. Cerebrally I know that's not true, but one has to believe it to be the case not just know it.

Couple that with my difficulty navigating life and I lash out at anyone to protect my ego. I have to always be right even when I'm wrong, because otherwise despair sinks in. I already don't get the world and what to do, the last thing I need is to toss the last vestige of control I have...being right.

I don't know how to fix it. I fight a lot a days, and win a few, but it's hard. It's so easy to go back, and the slightest failure when something new doesn't work out sends me spiraling. I've been reaching out to sources but they don't return my calls and my job has me working so much I don't have time to look into it.

I feel trapped, nowhere to go and no idea what I should do.

Obviously this doesn't make up for being shitty, and I'll accept that reality no matter how bitter it might taste, it's what I deserve. I just felt this needed to be said, for what it's worth.

I apologize for being a brat, to put it mildly.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: starpig] * 1
    #27936505 - 09/06/22 01:45 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Quote:

starpig said:
Ok, you know what screw this. I'm done being a briar patch to people.

It is too late to say this, given bridges I burned, but I'd rather do this now and see what come of this than allow this cycle to continue. If I can find the words.

I'm not gonna excuse my actions or what I said. I'm angry, angry and lonely and tired of the same thing each day. Of being alone every weekend, of never having anything I can talk or confide in, and further than that no one to hold. I'm so lonely that it burns sometimes inside my chest and it's all I can to fight to not off myself because some small part of me wants what is due, what I deserve, which I guess is happiness. Some greater part of me resists any attempt to be happy for reasons I have no idea about. And I guess seeing other people happy and well-adjusted burns so much that I want them to meet with harm just to kick them down. Thank God it never got past just thinking it.

It's been years since I've felt good things so I guess I have no idea what that life would look like for me. It's currently beyond my imagination, me being happy, impossible even. Cerebrally I know that's not true, but one has to believe it to be the case not just know it.

Couple that with my difficulty navigating life and I lash out at anyone to protect my ego. I have to always be right even when I'm wrong, because otherwise despair sinks in. I already don't get the world and what to do, the last thing I need is to toss the last vestige of control I have...being right.

I don't know how to fix it. I fight a lot a days, and win a few, but it's hard. It's so easy to go back, and the slightest failure when something new doesn't work out sends me spiraling. I've been reaching out to sources but they don't return my calls and my job has me working so much I don't have time to look into it.

I feel trapped, nowhere to go and no idea what I should do.

Obviously this doesn't make up for being shitty, and I'll accept that reality no matter how bitter it might taste, it's what I deserve. I just felt this needed to be said, for what it's worth.

I apologize for being a brat, to put it mildly.




That must have been hard to say (no sarcasm intended, just making sure you know that because text can be hard to interpret).

Being wrong about stuff can be the best thing if you are open to it.  It gives you an opportunity to grow.  It's hard and humbling to accept it though, but when you do it can be the most liberating feeling.


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Re: How to get a personality or make friends? [Re: schpat]
    #27936796 - 09/06/22 07:54 AM (1 year, 4 months ago)

Intellectually I know that to be true. But internalizing it and believing it has been hard since for me being wrong has a massive emotion charge and reaction to it and I’ve done it so long it’s hard to stop now. I’m having minimal success but I do recognize that it does have to stop for my sake as well as others.


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