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OfflineDeep_Khratom
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Registered: 07/13/22
Posts: 39
Loc: Thailand
Last seen: 5 months, 1 day
Disappointing San Pedro "trip"
    #27898194 - 08/10/22 10:15 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

So I was with this bunch of people, none that I knew, for a San pedro gathering (yes, weird I know). We all took the powder at the same time (I had 15 g initially, and then another 3 g.). Well they all seemed to be enjoying themselves, feeling connected with everything, dancing and trying to play music.
The setting was beautiful but all I could feel was a growing sense of anxiety, a terrible tightness in my chest, and a shortness of breath. But the worst was the physicals sensation in my chest. I felt really off compared to all the others. I talked to a few people but the anxiety made me feel socially awkward. I was a complete disappointment. They say that psychedelics don't show you what you want to see but what you need to see, well I didn't need to see that.
This lasted for 10 hours and I came back home, took something to ease off anxiety and went to sleep.

I had had the most wonderful trip on 6g of mushroom in a tea 8 days before.  This one was a sore disappointment and showed me that the beast is always lurking on the shadows. San Pedro triggered it. I have learnt that taking a product with people you don't feel comfortable with is a big no-no for me. Mind you it didn't seem to bother others`!

A few days later, in good and reassuring company this time (my husband again), we took 3.5 ++ of P.cubensis, and I was in for another ride of sad thoughts and anxiety...no visuals, no euphoria, no giggles, only recurrent sad thoughts. It was not a good trip, I wouldn't say a bad one but definitely not a pleasant one. What's happening? 

That time the magic had gone.

I'm going to take nothing for a while and trip again when I feel ready. And I hope the magic will return.
I feel robbed and cheated, but the worse thing is that I know the darkness comes from me...
Anybody else has had a something similar happen to them? kind of you're frightening to take shrooms again in case they twist your mind in the wrong direction?


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OfflineShiroiTora
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Registered: 03/16/21
Posts: 616
Loc: South Africa Flag
Last seen: 2 days, 10 hours
Re: Disappointing San Pedro "trip" [Re: Deep_Khratom]
    #27898263 - 08/11/22 01:35 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Your tolerance is probably just fucked from doing 3 high dose psychedelic trips in like.. A week:lol:

Your tolerance needs at least 2 weeks to recover, otherwise you are just wasting the sacrement. These things are not toys, or care-free antidepressant alternatives. The more you trip the more you are trying to fix, and most people are too stubborn to truly fix something without a great deal of darkness attached. So the darkness is not after you, by tripping so much YOU ARE AFTER THE DARKNESS.

You can fix this by either tripping less with higher doses, or by setting a strong intention and fortifying your will to be able to confront the darkness. I suggest your next high dose trip be in front of the mirror(physically or metaphorically), and also look into shadow work during sober life.


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InvisiblePsicomb
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Registered: 01/13/18
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Loc: the womb
Re: Disappointing San Pedro "trip" [Re: ShiroiTora]
    #27898435 - 08/11/22 07:03 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

:whathesaid:

Take a break and come back in a few months and I'd be willing to bet the trips feel more rejuvenating.


--------------------

When we constantly pull things apart trying to see how it works, we may end up with only an understanding of how to destroy something
- nick sand


Edited by Psicomb (08/11/22 07:07 AM)


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Offlinegolmo
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Registered: 09/11/15
Posts: 279
Loc: Canaan
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Re: Disappointing San Pedro "trip" [Re: Psicomb]
    #27899531 - 08/11/22 07:38 PM (1 year, 5 months ago)

and give san pedro another go.
try next time to make a water extract (can give you my tek if you want).
try higher dose maybe or find different source or fresh cuttings


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OfflineDeep_Khratom
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Registered: 07/13/22
Posts: 39
Loc: Thailand
Last seen: 5 months, 1 day
Re: Disappointing San Pedro "trip" [Re: golmo]
    #27899917 - 08/12/22 12:35 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Thanks guys!
Yeah, I'll give San Pedro another go, that's sure, but without a crowd of happy-go-lucky-I want-to play hippy kinda people. Nor the set or the setting were appropriate in this experience. I'll try again by myself or with a good friend. With wicked music of course. Music does a lot, for me it can steer a trip in the right direction. What would we do without it?

As for the dark place...it's always in me, always has been, and I don't need a friendly reminder from plants. I mean we take those compounds to get a glimpse of another dimension of your mind and the world that surrounds us, not to recoil in the burrows of our own inadequacies and old fears, unless it helps us to put things into perspective when back to a normal state.
I'll give mushrooms a long break. It'll be better next time.


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OfflineDeep_Khratom
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Registered: 07/13/22
Posts: 39
Loc: Thailand
Last seen: 5 months, 1 day
Re: Disappointing San Pedro "trip" [Re: ShiroiTora]
    #27899922 - 08/12/22 12:50 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

Thanks, that's helpful.


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Offlinedarkcreature
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Registered: 02/14/21
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Re: Disappointing San Pedro "trip" [Re: Deep_Khratom]
    #27899929 - 08/12/22 01:01 AM (1 year, 5 months ago)

i think all psychedelics are more or less unpredictable.  remember reading something about dynamic equilibrium of the brain being altered so its like in butterfly effect a minor sensation/thought can trigger cascading effects on the whole system


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