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Offlinelucyismywife
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Registered: 01/28/12 Happy 12th Shroomiversary!
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Last seen: 1 year, 9 months
My diagnosis changed from schizoaffective to
    #27731053 - 04/12/22 05:50 AM (1 year, 9 months ago)

something called DDNOS (dissociative disorder not otherwise specified)

Pretty much I have multiple or dual personalities but they don’t have a name for my exact disorder not yet. Hence ddnos. I’ve also been dxd as ptsd, SAD (seasonal effective disorder), SUD (substance use disorder) and ocd too.

Yeah I have a lot of issues. But I’d like to analyze those issues a little here and get some insight.

It makes sense that my abuse of hallucinogens as well as my careless self-medication in the past caused me a drug induced psychosis. Coupled with the ddnos and sad and the under the surface trauma. It also makes sense they thought I was schizoaffective.

But so the first 8 times I did lsd it was amazing. But the 9th time it was the trip from pure hell. Due to set and setting mostly. Id say more the “setting” than the “set” if I’m getting those terms correctly.

With ddnos we’re prone to drug abuse, alcoholism, anxiety, depression, poor self esteem.

I always knew about my alters. I just thought it was an aspect of schizophrenia. But not even bipolar makes much sense.

Ketamine associates me.  Even though it’s a dissociative it integrates me into reality more and more. All drugs do except the time I mixed shrooms with abilify caffeine and alcohol. Another story for later.

Naltrexone, abilify and klonopin saves me.

Nahhh I don’t do shrooms or acid anymore. Maybe dmt because it’s not totally nullified and blocked by abilify  And ketamine and weed. Naltrexone was the big life saver for me. Saved me from alcoholism and hppd

I hate to throw all these terms at y’all but it’s really the best explanation for whet I experienced

My first mental health symptom I remember was counting and I would count all the syllables and letters in a sentence I was saying with hopes it was divisible into one another which made a perfect sentence. And I’d adjust what I say in order to make a perfect sentence. I also used to count 3s 4s and 12s at a very young age.

But Then I got more much more serious trauma. Became a different identity in my life. While my real self still lived it shrunk to near nothingness

Drugs have hurt me at times. But they’ve also saved my life. I am and was sick of doctors telling me psychedelics are the worst thing I can do. I don’t mean to blame but their unwillingness to admit that psychedelics/hallucinogens can help me, well it actually hurt me, probably more then the drugs themselves at times. The stigma.

But here I am almost 32. It’s ok.

Thanks for listening/reading


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OfflineOpenQwerty
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Re: My diagnosis changed from schizoaffective to [Re: lucyismywife]
    #27733060 - 04/13/22 03:31 PM (1 year, 9 months ago)

IMO any psychiatric diagnosis has very poor scientific background (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rosenhan_experiment ) anyway to receive a un-scientific help may be better than to do not have any help at all, as long as you want "an helping hand". The stigma is a big problem, but if to go to the doctors has been a your decision: the stigma is (unfortunately) part of the price that you are compelled to pay for their help ; if the society compelled you to go to them (in a way or in an other), the society doesn't deserve that you care of what the people think about you, and you should (IMO) Just don't care about the stigma (but you can anyway to fight the stigma toward others whit the same problems that you are facing, and to do that will help also you firstly). Anyway...
Working on your self-esteem can help you a lot . Also, to find something to do that you can love doing(like an hobby or a job that you enjoy) often "is a big help"... even whit the biggest problems.


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OfflineTrancedOutBrah
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Re: My diagnosis changed from schizoaffective to [Re: lucyismywife]
    #27734181 - 04/14/22 09:37 AM (1 year, 9 months ago)

If ketamine assists you, you should look into powerful NMDA antagonists and see if that gives you any relief.

Ketamine is used to help with depression and a multitiude of mood disorders, the reasoning is that it's a good NMDA antagonist. Abusing it ruins that though and tolerance skyrockets.

Look into NMDA antagonists. I hope it helps man.


--------------------
Lead by example, words mean little when your actions don't reflect what you say.

Spread kindness, love, empathy, compassion.

Learn from mistakes. Try and do better. Each day is a new day, try to make it a better one.

Coconut and Avocado is awesome for the skin.

MIND OVER MATTER

:mushroom2::lsd:


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Invisiblekreg
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Registered: 09/14/21
Posts: 2,434
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Re: My diagnosis changed from schizoaffective to [Re: TrancedOutBrah] * 1
    #27734198 - 04/14/22 09:49 AM (1 year, 9 months ago)

Quote:

TrancedOutBrah said:
If ketamine assists you, you should look into powerful NMDA antagonists and see if that gives you any relief.

Ketamine is used to help with depression and a multitiude of mood disorders, the reasoning is that it's a good NMDA antagonist. Abusing it ruins that though and tolerance skyrockets.

Look into NMDA antagonists. I hope it helps man.



this is bad advice. Dissociatives would greatly worsen the mental condition of anyone living with any sort of schizo- or personality disorder. I take them for this exact reason, they really bring out the voices in my head.


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OfflineTrancedOutBrah
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Re: My diagnosis changed from schizoaffective to [Re: kreg]
    #27734289 - 04/14/22 11:13 AM (1 year, 9 months ago)

I did not recommend taking dissociative.

Please re-read my post again.

I recommended taking a powerful NDMA antagonist. I did not recommend taking Ketamine. I simply stated the reason why OP feels relief when taking ketamine is because of the NMDA mechanism behind it.

If it was unclear, it should be clear now.


--------------------
Lead by example, words mean little when your actions don't reflect what you say.

Spread kindness, love, empathy, compassion.

Learn from mistakes. Try and do better. Each day is a new day, try to make it a better one.

Coconut and Avocado is awesome for the skin.

MIND OVER MATTER

:mushroom2::lsd:


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Invisiblekreg
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Re: My diagnosis changed from schizoaffective to [Re: TrancedOutBrah] * 1
    #27734302 - 04/14/22 11:23 AM (1 year, 9 months ago)

Quote:

I recommended taking a powerful NDMA antagonist



thats a dissociative. Thats almost what they are by definition even


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InvisibleCreonAntigone
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Registered: 05/30/21
Posts: 2,875
Re: My diagnosis changed from schizoaffective to [Re: TrancedOutBrah]
    #27734354 - 04/14/22 12:13 PM (1 year, 9 months ago)

All mental disorders are related to each other, like species of a genus. Similar processes incline to each one, and one can easily cause another or vice versa.

I feel that psychiatry often doesn't do people help by loading them with many diagnoses. The problem with this approach is that one gets lost in the weeds and no longer focuses on the chief problems that are facing them.

I think it is clear that depression can cause schizoaffection or substance abuse. Or in a different case, substance abuse could be the strongest cause and lead to later schizoaffection and depression. Those two situations are radically different: one requires the focus on stopping the substance as the chief need, while in the other case the substance is merely a byproduct of the general condition.

But people need to learn to be individuals and to see beyond all these problems they have to find a path for themselves. Often I am not sure if psychiatry with its book of diagnoses can help with that.

Quote:

TrancedOutBrah said:
If ketamine assists you, you should look into powerful NMDA antagonists and see if that gives you any relief.

Ketamine is used to help with depression and a multitiude of mood disorders, the reasoning is that it's a good NMDA antagonist. Abusing it ruins that though and tolerance skyrockets.

Look into NMDA antagonists. I hope it helps man.




Also look into the weak NMDA antagonist, magnesium.

Mag is a mineral that most Americans are deficit in, and it has natural anti-depressant and anti-anxiety properties.

Some people swear by magnesium glycinate everyday - glycinate is a chelate form so it is more absorbable.


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OfflineTerdleMountain
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Registered: 02/06/21
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Re: My diagnosis changed from schizoaffective to [Re: lucyismywife]
    #27735011 - 04/14/22 08:36 PM (1 year, 9 months ago)

This is interesting in that DDNOS/MPD isn't used anymore. It went away with the DSM-IV in 1994 and was replaced with OSDD/DID (other specified dissociative disorder/dissociative identity disorder). I'd really call the Dx change into question, very seriously into question if you are in a country that follows the DSM. I know the ICD-10 lists DDNOS as a DX, but the ICD-11 that just came out lists P-DID rather than DDNOS, I think the change came this last February.

>abilify saves me.

Abilify made me absolutely suicidal... I mean turn the blender to "JUICE" and let 'er rip suicidal. It apparently repressed some alters and made others dysfunctional. I just lost contact and really could think of nothing but ending it.

Anyhoo, it's a long road ahead! Going from the docs saying you have a dissociative disorder to gettting the final Dx takes time and work. Learning who your alters are and establishing communication is key. I'm only starting and I'm at 12 alters so far, but I know there's more hiding in there. This shit is rough as hell... 70% of us make at least one suicide attempt, take it seriously!


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OfflineTerdleMountain
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Re: My diagnosis changed from schizoaffective to [Re: CreonAntigone]
    #27735065 - 04/14/22 09:02 PM (1 year, 9 months ago)

Dissociative disorder really are in a class of their own. OSDD/DID is often misdiagnosed as schitzoaffective disorder, bi-polar and a number of other things but it is foundationaly different in it's root cause and it's manifestations. It is induced by severe trauma in the early stages of childhood development rather than having organic origins.

The theory goes that humans are born with a mind that functions in relatively separate parts. As the mind develops these parts unify into a single self. Extended, severe and repeated trauma keeps these parts from integrating. No single sense of self can develop and it leaves the mind prone to further splitting as subsequent traumas happen throughout life. In my case I have developed a number of these parts (alters) just to handle day to day tasks like work, paying the bills, interacting with people... and on and on. It is my mind's way of compartmentalizing things so that I can function without becoming overwhelmed and shutting down. (Which still happens from time to time. I get stressed and go straight into survival mode, which for me is Flight mode.).

It's probably the most complex and least understood of all psych disorders, really fun stuff for sure.


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Invisiblekreg
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Re: My diagnosis changed from schizoaffective to [Re: TerdleMountain]
    #27735084 - 04/14/22 09:15 PM (1 year, 9 months ago)

science people use pcp/mk801 to uh uhhhhhh "simulate schizophrenia"


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OfflineTerdleMountain
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Re: My diagnosis changed from schizoaffective to [Re: kreg]
    #27735121 - 04/14/22 09:38 PM (1 year, 9 months ago)

PCP is fucking nasty.

But schizophrenia is more closely related to epilepsy, believe it or not. The are both due to wayward electrical activity, just in different regions of the brain. This is what I meant when I said they have organic origins rather than being induced like DID.


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