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I don't know what to do at this point in my life and I need advice. Here's what happened.
I'm diagnosed with schizo-affective disorder and I've been on a bunch of different meds over the last two years. First I was on zyprexa for a month or so and it messed me up worse then I was before that. I started taking geodon a while after that for a few months and then quit it because it made me feel like shit with no emotions or feeling at all. Well after quitting it I was really messed up, far more messed up then before. I started getting panic attacks and the voices and thinking were always there and one time I had a really bad panic attack and I went to the psych ward for two weeks and they put me back on geodon. That was august of last year when I started geodon again. I'm still on it now to this day. I've wanted to get off of geodon since about the end of last year and have tried to quit it about a dozen times or more. My real problem: I can't sleep with out it! It's much worse then it sounds. I have stayed up for seven days after trying to quit geodon and still had to go back to taking it just so I could sleep. My cunt of a doctor won't even prescribe me geodon anymore because she wanted me to go up to a higher dose (fuck that, fuck geodon) and I didn't want to. I've been living off of old geodon pills for the last month and I now only have 4 days left of geodon pills. I'm kind of in panic mode because I don't know what I'm going to do in 4 days when I run out. I have a feeling that no matter what I'm fucked at this point. You're probably thinking how they have sleeping meds that could make me sleep. Well they don't work for me. When I go off of geodon, the only thing that makes me sleep is geodon. I've tried all sorts of downers, tranqs and sleeping meds and they don't do shit. It's not really matter of being tired. Somehow geodon lets my brain shut down and go to sleep.
Here is a big thank you to all of the doctors and meds that have played a part in ruining my life.
these kind of problems require you to trust your dr. they take years to usually get straightened out. there is obviously a deeper underlining issue that you need to come to terms with and resolve. are you seeing a psychologst weekly? you need to.
do what mndfreeze said, exercise and eating right make a big difference.
you need to stay on a medicine for a while and really try to do it, you deserve that much. theres absolutely nothing wrong with having to take pills. instead of always looking at it in a negative way, try to understand that they are to help you, not hurt you.
theres nothing wrong with getting a second opinion.
-------------------- if you can't find the truth right where you are, where else do you expect to find it?