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I don't know if this is the right forum for this but it felt like a spiritual experience to me....
O.k. I recently ate 3 grams of freshly dried B+ shrooms. I wasn't in the right mind set to do this because I was comming down with a sinus cold, getting the fever and massive head ache. But I went ahead anyways. I decided to watch the special edition The Doors, Oliver Stone's movie. Everything was just like any other shroom trip I have had, anxious feeling in the stomach, etc. etc. But then I felt like I was stuck in some hardcore deja vu.
I eventually turned the movie off because it became impossible to focus visually on it. All the colors were merging together rendering features meaningless. I suddenly felt a lil bit ill and decided I needed to take a shower. This is a bad idea, very hard to walk to the shower let alone stand in it and wash yourself without falling. No sense of balance. After the shower I started losing depth perception, everything became flat or inside out or streched. Think M.C. Esher artwork.
I relised this was going to be a trip where I would need to lay down and listen to some music. I found my bed and put on some music. Time shifted, the music was endless and surronding me. I looked at my feet and watched as the room/world disappeared around me. My body was still there and I was surrounded by 3D patterns(much like in the Parabol Tool video). I don't know how long I was like this, but it was long enough for me to start to control the patterns and change their colors.
When the room/world finally became percievable again I noticed there was a big thunderstorm beginning to hit. I rasied my hand and watched as my index finger raised and it tunneled away from me. When the tunnel final peirced thru the blinds/window lighting hit outside causing me to luagh almost uncontrollably(I thought I has caused the lighting).
It was then that I remembered how much I loved thunderstorms as a child. And it was also then that I had some sort of spirtual cleansing/breakdown(?). I began to think of all the things that had ever brought joy to me in my life, family, friends, nature, etc. etc. and also of all the things I have done that I am now ashamed of. I have never done this before while tripping, but I completely lost control of my emotions and bawled forever. And it wasn't the loud crying/sobbing or anything, and I wasn't sad. In fact the tears just silently flowed out of me and I was happy that it was happening.
I was glad to remember things I thought I had forgotten, and I was glad that I was ashamed of some of the thing I had done. I was glad to be who I was and to have know and seen the things I have seen. And I began to think of where my life is headed and what choices I make in the future will I regret when I am dying. The funny thing is during this whole self enlightenment process I can't remeber feeling the effects of the shrooms or seeing strong halucinations. But finally when I started to feel at ease with myself, the shrooms came back and I was on the downward ride.
I must say this was a very very very strange thing for me. I don't consider myself to be a spiritual person, and usually I consume shrooms to just have a good time and not reflect on anything in my life. I am confused and intriged by this experiance, but I hope it doesn't happen again until I am ready for it! I'm still a bit cluster fucked by this whole thing, if anyone else has had anything like this happen please post...............
-------------------- "Burnin', I feel a burnin' in my stomach
I wanna' know if I'm a gonna make it
If I don't just spread my ashes
If I do just spread your mind"
I've had two or three mushroom trips in which this exact concept happened to me.. after considering all the great things in my life, I felt like I was filled up with some incredible love which flowed through me as I tried to explain ego loss to my friend, who was also tripping and was very confused. (kept saying "I feel like I'm looking for something, but I don't know what it is")