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I tripped for the first time last night, eating an approximated 25-30 grams on an empty stomach.
After some time and abortive attempts at meditation, staring at wood grain and seeing eyes and faces in it faintly, I retired to my bed for the majority of the trip. I put Tony Scott?s Music for Zen Meditation in the CD player.
The sound of a running pump, the hum of the fan motor and the clink-clink-clink of its pull-chain, and the sounds of air currents became insignificant as a powerful buzzing rose in my spine. The slow mandolin and bamboo flute melodies were all I knew as my racing mind extended out the back of my head, and I explored the unfamiliar mushroom space.
Endless tableaus of scenes I cannot recall danced before my closed eyes as the music played. The CD ended, and I inserted M?m- Summer Make Good. The sounds of the sea and the gentle melodies in this album were beyond belief, as well as the hushed melancholic sounds of the vocals: ?I hope tonight you will touch my hair and draw ghosts on my back? and moments stretched on forever. My thoughts came back to myself eventually as the CD ended.
I spent time searching for something within my mind to call self. I did not find it, but I did rediscover within myself a passion for art that time had dimmed. I thought of myself, and my lack of gratitude for the spark of life within myself. I marveled at the energy from the Big Bang present in all of our bodies, in all animals, in all organisms, in all things. I resolved to improve myself somehow everyday, to pay more respect and show more gratitude to my family and friends, and to make amends with a recent ex-girlfriend. I spent much time simply smiling and moving repetitively on the bed, feeling a sublime happiness from all sensation. I watched fluid patterns flow on the rough plaster ceiling.
As I began to come down, I crawled out the window and sat on the roof, watching the night and listening to the night sounds. Eventually I came back, tossed and turned for a few hours in bed, tried to read but couldn?t really focus, and felt an strong restlessness. Eventually I managed to sleep.
-------------------- "I'm afraid of losing my obscurity. Genuineness only thrives in the dark. Like celery."
- Aldous Huxley