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Anonymous #1
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 I am heart broken 
#27340269 - 06/08/21 01:20 PM (2 years, 10 months ago) |
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I know i posted this few days ago, but information got corruptted and the there was miss leading info.
Plus, VITAL information came to light, so i am posting this again, beg your pardon:
My "soul mate" love of 14 years.... she was the most beautiful woman I encountered
We live on the other side of the word cos i have hjob here and i was working my ass off hoping to make her happy and bring back tons of cash. I loved her, God loved her
Few weeks ago i was tripping and i had a thought, while shes alone she shouldnt suffer alone, and i told her she can go out and have fun and enjoy herself and maybe hgave some "fun" with other men.
Well few days ago, she really did have "fun" with other man - she slept with him. It put a knife in my heart
That wasnt what i meant when i said things while tripping.
I was devastaeted. But few days ago i relaised i still love her and was hoping to work things out with her when i get back.
Today i found out that her best male buddy was spreading lies about me, nasty lies. And that was partly why she shlep with the other guy.
I was pissed. I said a lot of nasty horrrible things about him. Because he was partly the reason for wrecking our love.
And today my girfried tells me she dumps me. Aparently because i am "too angry" (to her douche bag friend) WHo aparently she had more love for him than me.
I am fucking devastated. My heart still cant processs what happened.
For 14 years i loved her withut any hesitation, with all my heart.
Then i started thinking and i came to realsie this was long in the making. Back 14 - 10 years ago when we were going out, i seen signs, signs that she didnt care about my heart that much and it was alll just a show, for money and fame , afdter all i have a respectable, non ordinary job and it brought a lot of glamour to my girlfriends life. I simply dissmissed (she -didnt - care - about - my heart thought) cos i loved her.
So today she said its over and she even sweared at me.
There is a massive hole in my heart.
And i am fresh out of weed, all i have is wine and smokes.
My heart still cant process it. But something tells me i will survive without her.
Aparently she loved her male friend more than me.......... i was such a fool.
Sorry for posting this again but i neeed to express my emotions because heart ache is killing me
Edited by Anonymous (06/08/21 06:38 PM)
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 4d6Mycology
Seeker
Registered: 06/04/21
Posts: 104
Last seen: 8 months, 17 days
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I'm sorry my friend. I have seen this happen to many of my peers, and it always seem to be the same. Unconditional, back breaking love is soaked up, drained dry, and spit out by "people" who simply couldn't care less about those that suffer for them.
If you'd like some friendly advice, don't be angry with this new "man" (more like a boy) in her life. I would pity him. Because she will do the same exact thing to him. She will look for satisfaction, pleasure, money, envy, and glory, and when she gets it, everything will be ok. BUT as SOON as she meets any resistance, her "love" will collapse and she will celebrate another victory with loneliness and a shallow life, and the cycle will repeat until she is so bitter and vindictive, that she will turn to the law.
Be extremely thankful that she is gone, people like that will lie and manipulate everything and everyone around them to win, no matter what the cost.
My buddies ex wife told her kids to tell the police that they were raped by their father. Without any evidence, they arrested him, no questions asked. She is celebrating and going on free cruises, my friend is facing 25 years to life, has not had any of his heart medicine in over a week and is being physically and verbally tortured.....
Because a woman said so.
I wish nothing but the best for you and yours, we have to be careful out here and watch each other's backs. Stay safe man, and take care of yourself. 
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Anonymous #1
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5 shrooms !!!
But i still cant believe it was 14 years ... 
Edited by Anonymous (06/08/21 02:07 PM)
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4d6Mycology
Seeker
Registered: 06/04/21
Posts: 104
Last seen: 8 months, 17 days
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It's unfathomable honestly... But it must not have started like this. What you shared was real for the both of you, and I'm sure she still hold fonds memories of you, whether she can admit or not. That shouldn't be invalid to you, the audacity to face the universe and all it's chaos and say, "I believe in this, I'm committed to it."
You are no fool in my book. You can say nasty things that you don't really mean, reminisce on things and how maybe you could've seen it or you could've done this or that... But that doesn't make you a fool, that makes you a human.
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Anonymous #1
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14 years.... my heart STILL cant processs it
I cant believe to her it eas one big joke
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Anonymous #2
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I spent about 14 years with my ex. She pulled some shit and ended up with everything. The house, retirement investments, all other investments and didn't have to pay child support even though she made 250k a year after I gave up my career to support her and teach her how to do her job. Even got a judgement for another 10k against me, all after spending 150k in legal fees.
You may not feel it now, but it could have been a lot worse. I was never able to give my kid much at all because I lost it all. You didn't have kids together and she hasn't left you penniless and over 100k in debt. You'll get over it and you'll move on.
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Anonymous #3
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said:
14 years.... my heart STILL cant processs it
One day, you'll look back and realize that this woman took you as a boy and made you into a man.
These things happen for a reason.
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Anonymous #1
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The douche bag friend of hers, ive known him for as long as ive knwon my ex girlfriend.
hes a enemy of me and he hates me.
I had NO FUCKING IDEA my girlfridn be friended him behind my back and NEVER even mentioned it.
Some times in the past i pissed him off which wasnt evena fault of mine, so he voved revenge, he said some day hes gonnna catch me and hurt me plenty.
This man is very influential and has a lot of friends a lot of people listen to him.
Yesterday i confronted my girlfriend: you friends wants to phsyically absue me, some one who u loved ... is that really OK with you......
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She said .......... yes
Just because faggot friend wanst to hurt me now my ex wants to hurt me too.
My day cant get any worse than this.
This morning i woke up with first light and realised i still love her.......
I just cant believe it. In 1 week, from being a happy couple, we turned into enemies and now she even wants to physically hurt me.
So much for our 14 year old love eh
Edited by Anonymous (06/09/21 06:28 AM)
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Anonymous #1
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I JUST realised something bitter-sweet.
This week is our 14 year anniversary since we met..........
I sent her a text:
"Happy anniversary my dear love"
But recieved no reply....
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 Pahpshmir
No one of consequence
Registered: 05/29/21
Posts: 27
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Similar situation happen to me. This was not a person to love. What you need to focus on is getting your mind away from the circling thoughts. I spent two years with the constant cycle of thoughts that you seem to be having and drove me to drink excessively for years. I woke up one morning, realized she was happy and I was still miserable. I asked myself why am I miserable for such a terrible person? That's when I started to learn to love myself. And when you really start trying and focusing on what you need and want apart from this person, it starts to get better. One day at a time. The first few days were the hardest. I made it last longer because I didn't make the decision that my life was more valuable then deemed by someone else.
It's one of the hardest things to do, but don't stay stagnate. Keep moving, find a new hobby, just keep putting one foot infront of the other. You may cry day in and day out, but the more you move forward the less it will be.
People like that don't deserve a heart that can love. Also, try not to text, you'll only be prolonging your pain.
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Anonymous #1
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 Re: I am heart broken [Re: Pahpshmir]
#27341204 - 06/09/21 07:07 AM (2 years, 10 months ago) |
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I am looking at photos she sent me in a adorable loving positions and postures of love, and cant help but cry
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Anonymous #1
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Im just gonna gte fucked up and drink my worries down the drain today
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Anonymous #1
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Quote:
People like that don't deserve a heart that can love.
In my mind i am going over all the history we shared together and all the things we did. I cante bleieve, i thought she had a a heart of gold, but i was wrong
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Pahpshmir
No one of consequence
Registered: 05/29/21
Posts: 27
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From my experience that only amplifies it while it temporarily gives the false sense of relief. I suggest allowing yourself to feel what you are and know that it is temporary. You may feel alone now but that's the beauty of life, it's always changing.
Edited by Pahpshmir (06/09/21 07:22 AM)
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Anonymous #1
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Re: I am heart broken [Re: Pahpshmir]
#27341721 - 06/09/21 02:17 PM (2 years, 10 months ago) |
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I wonder what goes thro mind of my ex today, she probably thinks how much i sufffer without her
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Anonymous #2
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No, she's thinking about how she can use the new guy(s) in her life. She doesn't give a fuck about you, dude.
Sorry to have to tell you that.
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Growking
🤠🥳🤠🥳
Registered: 04/30/21
Posts: 30
Last seen: 2 years, 8 months
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This kinda happened to me 3 years ago but I only dated her for 7 years. The only advice I have is to make positive actions in your own life to distract you. Life gets better when you focus on your self. I went through a downward spiral the first year and now I'm way happier with an even more amazing person who loves me. Keep your head up and try to focus on positive activities for your self brother. I'm sorry for your loss but this to will pass and when it does you wont ever remember what you saw in her.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: I am heart broken [Re: Growking]
#27344201 - 06/11/21 09:25 AM (2 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
You look kind of cute when you're mad
Your eyes are pretty when you look sad
Nothing's like a salty kiss
Tasting the tears, the tears on your lips
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Anonymous #1
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I donno if i posted this before but back in 2007 when we hooked up and the underground apocalyptic war started collective spirit sang thro Rihanah:
Quote:
When the sun shines, we'll shine together
Told you I'll be here forever
Said I'll always be your friend
Took an oath, I'ma stick it out 'til the end
My Ex even sang this song herself
So sad she didnt keep her "oath"
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Anonymous #1
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What i really wonna know is what going to happnen to others "US"
I mean in multiple incarnations here... and even on other planets
I mean it wasnt just me and her here, now
We are soul mates and forever be as one, on spiritual level we are INSEPARABLE
After all We a partnerss in many realities / even other planets
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Im not aware of too many things, the only " paralllel" incaration of us im aware of is in Australia - Cairns.
I breifly me her in 2004 while passing by, she recognsided my soul and gave me the SWEETEST smile.... I never seeen more affectioned loving smile in my life
Theres one more incarnation im aware of and its on another planet, where we are husband and wife and best friends
I have no idea how its going to play out
Edited by Anonymous (06/11/21 11:02 AM)
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