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OfflineCracked Egg
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Registered: 02/22/20
Posts: 1,349
Last seen: 11 hours, 7 minutes
I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me
    #27293433 - 05/04/21 08:27 AM (3 days, 1 hour ago)

It doesn't happen often, but I'll go to wipe and it just never ends. Like, I'm done. I know I'm done, but no matter what, there's always the faintest little streak.

I feel like my butt sits there all day smelling ass and eventually becomes fed up and reaches a boiling point.

You know what!? Fuck this guy. Next time he takes a shit I'm going to continue to leave a tiny streak on the toilet paper.

He then does this non stop. I picture him sitting there with a big old grin with his finger and flicks the paper..


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People Say I'll Regret That In the Morning, So I Sleep Till Noon..


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Offlinechristopera
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Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: Cracked Egg]
    #27293438 - 05/04/21 08:31 AM (3 days, 1 hour ago)

Get a bidet.


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A Dorito is pizza, change my mind.

Bank and Union with The Shroomery at the Zuul on The internet - now with %'s and things

I’m sorry it had to be me.


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InvisibleNiffla
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Registered: 06/09/08
Posts: 35,481
Loc: Texas
Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: christopera]
    #27293445 - 05/04/21 08:40 AM (3 days, 1 hour ago)

Y'all wanna do some butt stuff?


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Offlinechristopera
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Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: Niffla] * 1
    #27293448 - 05/04/21 08:42 AM (3 days, 1 hour ago)



--------------------
A Dorito is pizza, change my mind.

Bank and Union with The Shroomery at the Zuul on The internet - now with %'s and things

I’m sorry it had to be me.


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Invisiblestubb
Dahg Rastubfari
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Registered: 03/23/19
Posts: 370
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Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: christopera]
    #27293450 - 05/04/21 08:44 AM (3 days, 1 hour ago)

Quote:

christopera said:
Get a bidet.




:whathesaid:

America needs to jump on that bandwagon, bidets are fucking awesome.  Cheap, easy to install, renter friendly, and the ladies love 'em.


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InvisibleNiffla
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Registered: 06/09/08
Posts: 35,481
Loc: Texas
Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: christopera]
    #27293452 - 05/04/21 08:45 AM (3 days, 1 hour ago)

Quote:

christopera said:





:whacker:


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Offlinechristopera
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Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: stubb] * 1
    #27293453 - 05/04/21 08:45 AM (3 days, 1 hour ago)

My wife hates our bidet, says it gets her all wet. I am totally jealous.


--------------------
A Dorito is pizza, change my mind.

Bank and Union with The Shroomery at the Zuul on The internet - now with %'s and things

I’m sorry it had to be me.


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InvisibleNiffla
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Registered: 06/09/08
Posts: 35,481
Loc: Texas
Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: christopera]
    #27293456 - 05/04/21 08:47 AM (3 days, 1 hour ago)

Quote:

christopera said:
My wife hates our bidet, says it gets her all wet.





:whacker:


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Offlinechristopera
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Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: Niffla]
    #27293459 - 05/04/21 08:49 AM (3 days, 1 hour ago)

Hey, the only person that masturbates to my wife is me. Also all the people on her onlyfans.


--------------------
A Dorito is pizza, change my mind.

Bank and Union with The Shroomery at the Zuul on The internet - now with %'s and things

I’m sorry it had to be me.


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InvisibleNiffla
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Registered: 06/09/08
Posts: 35,481
Loc: Texas
Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: christopera]
    #27293496 - 05/04/21 09:27 AM (3 days, 25 minutes ago)

Quote:

christopera said:
Hey, the only person that masturbates to my wife is me. Also all the people on her onlyfans.






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Invisiblelarry.fisherman
octopus fucking starfish
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Registered: 11/03/12
Posts: 33,428
Loc: Swimming in Circles Flag
Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: Cracked Egg] * 1
    #27293516 - 05/04/21 09:49 AM (3 days, 3 minutes ago)

How is it possible that it's never clean? Like, you're not supposed to shove your finger up your ass when you're wiping. I get the allure, it's dirty in there. But shoving tp up your taint isn't making your crack cleaner it just means you're gay


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OfflineCracked Egg
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Registered: 02/22/20
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Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: larry.fisherman]
    #27293525 - 05/04/21 09:54 AM (2 days, 23 hours ago)

I mean, it does a little bit


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People Say I'll Regret That In the Morning, So I Sleep Till Noon..


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InvisibleShroomerInTheRye
Cunning Linguist
I'm a teapot User Gallery


Registered: 01/12/12
Posts: 12,849
Loc: America's Microwave Flag
Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: larry.fisherman]
    #27293537 - 05/04/21 10:05 AM (2 days, 23 hours ago)

Everyone’s pucker hole has wrinkles and folds that can create little poop reservoirs. Sometimes you get, like, baby food shits. Like you didn’t have enough fiber that day or maybe you have intestinal problems. I understand OPs pain about wiping until your anus almost chaps and still having the poop streak.

I am all about that bidet life.


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:nyan: <-- Clicky Clicky


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Offlineflugelizor
Furious ball of nothing
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Registered: 11/16/08
Posts: 1,524
Loc: Western NY
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Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: ShroomerInTheRye]
    #27293564 - 05/04/21 10:42 AM (2 days, 23 hours ago)



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OfflineCracked Egg
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Registered: 02/22/20
Posts: 1,349
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Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: flugelizor]
    #27293601 - 05/04/21 11:14 AM (2 days, 22 hours ago)

I'm a wipey guy


--------------------
People Say I'll Regret That In the Morning, So I Sleep Till Noon..


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OfflineCracked Egg
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Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: flugelizor]
    #27293605 - 05/04/21 11:14 AM (2 days, 22 hours ago)

Quote:

flugelizor said:





:lolsy:


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People Say I'll Regret That In the Morning, So I Sleep Till Noon..


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InvisibleTexas Honey Badger
No fucks given
I'm a teapot User Gallery


Registered: 07/12/18
Posts: 21,078
Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: Niffla]
    #27294121 - 05/04/21 04:35 PM (2 days, 17 hours ago)

Quote:

Niffla said:
Quote:

christopera said:





:whacker:



You sick basturd
:batlol:


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PAW FOR OTD and Sports forum MOD 2021


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InvisibleNiffla
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Registered: 06/09/08
Posts: 35,481
Loc: Texas
Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: Texas Honey Badger]
    #27294128 - 05/04/21 04:36 PM (2 days, 17 hours ago)

Quote:

Texas Honey Badger said:
Quote:

Niffla said:
Quote:

christopera said:





:whacker:



You sick basturd
:batlol:




:guiltyascharged:


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Offlinechristopera
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Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: Niffla]
    #27294139 - 05/04/21 04:44 PM (2 days, 17 hours ago)



--------------------
A Dorito is pizza, change my mind.

Bank and Union with The Shroomery at the Zuul on The internet - now with %'s and things

I’m sorry it had to be me.


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OfflineEggtimer
HotSauce Lover

Registered: 05/05/13
Posts: 2,624
Last seen: 1 hour, 7 minutes
Re: I swear my ass (butt) plays jokes on me [Re: Cracked Egg]
    #27294419 - 05/04/21 08:01 PM (2 days, 13 hours ago)

Pics from OPs bathroom.
Yo heads up don't do a image search for anal fistulas and keep scrolling because it just gets worse. :uhoh: Be careful about spending too much time on the shitter might get a fistula.


--------------------
"I consider our Earth as a part of the lowest area
We live as we were at the bottom of the sea
Where nothing is pure and undespoiled, Where everything is eaten and eroded"
"Foreseen ending, affliction of elusive perspective is just an illusion built from fear and emotional momentum
Fragmental pieces of timeline are now operating your mental consciousness"



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