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OfflinetheRealrollforever
Selfproclaimedwizard
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: ch0ppie] * 1
    #27063996 - 11/30/20 07:24 AM (1 month, 23 days ago)

We do know the wrong side of a magnet will actually REPEL another magnet; people are much the same :burke:


--------------------
:wizard: :wizard:
sunshine said:
The order has to be secret and no one is sure.


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Offlineyeah
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: theRealrollforever]
    #27064406 - 11/30/20 01:28 PM (1 month, 23 days ago)

yep it's an asymmetric dance
I've definitely learned the hard way that you can't really show interest in a woman because once they know they already have your approval or some shit their panties dry up in an instant
ya gotta keep them thinking you couldn't care less so they keep trying to get said approval
:shrug:


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[


Edited by yeah (11/30/20 01:28 PM)


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OfflinetheRealrollforever
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: yeah]
    #27064688 - 11/30/20 03:42 PM (1 month, 23 days ago)

This is true.  This chick is begging for my attention now.  Before when I was just being straight up interested she would always be busy; string me along, etc.  ima close this one out and be proud of myself I didn't get sucked into her attention seeking bullshit.  By close out I mean nail it


--------------------
:wizard: :wizard:
sunshine said:
The order has to be secret and no one is sure.


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InvisibleFiery
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Registered: 12/24/12
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: theRealrollforever]
    #27064741 - 11/30/20 04:12 PM (1 month, 23 days ago)

Quote:

theRealrollforever said:
ima close this one out and be proud of myself I didn't get sucked into her attention seeking bullshit.  By close out I mean nail it






Riiiiiiiggghhhttt. Good luck foreal though.


Ok, let us know how that goes.






And I agree. Men are emotionally messed up sometimes, but women take the cake for most crazy . I mean I was with a crazy woman for a while because the sex was good, but then shit got real crazy.


Men just tend to ignore emotions and feelings and women get caught up in twisted emotional games like it's a damn sport. I run away fast from women like that. 



Zero BS. Zero lies, zero fakeness, zero emotional games. :themoreyouknow:


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Invisiblech0ppie
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Registered: 11/18/20
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: yeah]
    #27065218 - 11/30/20 08:55 PM (1 month, 23 days ago)

Quote:

yeah said:
yep it's an asymmetric dance
I've definitely learned the hard way that you can't really show interest in a woman because once they know they already have your approval or some shit their panties dry up in an instant
ya gotta keep them thinking you couldn't care less so they keep trying to get said approval
:shrug:




Sad to say I've experienced similar. Nice guys finish last.. Apparently they're less interested the more you try :confused:


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Invisibletyrannicalrex
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: edgar1337]
    #27070734 - 12/03/20 10:56 PM (1 month, 19 days ago)

Webster! I was wondering where you were.


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InvisibleJokeshopbeardM
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Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 24,186
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: tyrannicalrex]
    #27071541 - 12/04/20 12:20 PM (1 month, 19 days ago)

Quote:

tyrannicalrex said:
Webster! I was wondering where you were.



I don't think so. Webster was a total 'bro', edgar actually has brains.


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Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


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InvisibleMr.GuessWork
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Registered: 03/30/13
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: Jokeshopbeard] * 1
    #27072095 - 12/04/20 05:24 PM (1 month, 19 days ago)

Quote:

Jokeshopbeard said:
Quote:

theRealrollforever said:
You killed it with..." ok so do you want to?"



I completely agree with this statement. It belies a huge misunderstanding of how women operate. There's 0 romance or charm in the way you approached that situation.





I think this points towards what's been going wrong in a revealing way. Chicks are obviously checking you out and trying to start intimate relationships with you. You've been getting some pretty heavy handed hints when they tell you things like "you look good"; that's an invitation to start/continue flirting. It seems like you've done a good bit of thinking about your anxiety around dating or whatever the hell kids are calling it these days, and you've definitely succeeded with figuring out how to be sexy and attractive. The next part is where you're struggling, and I think you're anxious because you know you don't understand what should happen next or what the expectation should be. It's good to think about this stuff intellectually, as your current successes nicely demonstrate, but in order to maintain an interest and develop a relationship, you need to find a way to integrate your thoughts and feelings into the interaction in a way that works with her feelings and expectations. When you said "ok so do you want to?", you disrupted her chain of thoughts and feelings and made her panic about how to respond to a heavy handed sexual advance instead, and that disrupted the nice conversation you were having about sex. A more natural\supportive response would have been to continue the conversation by relating to her feelings and experience with some of your own feelings and then leave an indirect opening for her to explore further. After she talking about what she missed about the sex stuff, you could have followed up by sharing feelings and fantasies that complement hers. She misses sex and intimacy and wants to talk about it? Then close your eyes and share a fantasy about how nice it feels to cuddle with someone in the dark, how it feels to hold somebody close and be able to let them go for a moment and be surprised when they grab you back for more. That might be a bit aggressive, and IRL I'd transition the conversation more gradually, but the conversation needs to continue if you want it to lead to sex. If it's going well then she'll bump up the sexiness in the conversation and maybe make an advance herself. When the tone and expectations of the conversation change more slowly and gradually, then there are lots of opportunities to change the subject or bail out entirely, and it's harder for either person to get startled when the expectation\invitation for sex becomes more explicit and unignorable. If you're feeling anxious about what to say or how you feel, I'd suggest you do some fantasizing about that part of the encounter. Reading romance novels can be informative too, since they can give some insight into a female perspective of a sex fantasy. Those novels like to build anticipation, and that can give you a better feel for what leads up to the sex part of the sexual fantasies. Building Anticipation helps set expectations.

Foreplay in all things, even conversation.


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Onlinemycot
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: Mr.GuessWork]
    #27074328 - 12/06/20 12:24 AM (1 month, 17 days ago)

So your handsome and a bodybuilder.
You might even have a big dick.
None of that matters.
You got lots of cash ?
Now you're talking.


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OfflineTattersail
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: edgar1337]
    #27129783 - 01/06/21 08:39 AM (17 days, 13 hours ago)

Man that sounds tough. I've heard about the kind of ridiculous "sexist education" that goes on in US universities and it sounds really quite insane. It shouldn't be legal to have such dogma mandated in universities. I'm an ex-Feminist myself, I was quite unhappy as a feminist and now actively oppose the dogma that poisons the minds of many young women just starting out in the world. It sets them up to be treated like children their whole lives, and interferes in their relationships with men. Feminism claims to be about female sexual "empowerment" but also expects a kind of puritanism from men. I was brought up to value my body and not just give it sexually to randomers. One-night stands are considered the pinnacle of female empowerment but it cheapens the body even more than prostitution. In a hedonistic sense it's okay because it was "fun" to do so, but it's a very high risk activity, often not as much fun as expected and in the end you're giving your body to someone who is not yet known as husband/father material. I'm not saying young women should not have sex as and when they like, but it's not all it's cracked up to be.

So, avoid university women. Not all will be taken in by the feminist thing or accuse you of rape for looking at them, but it's hard to tell and I will be advising my own sons against looking for love in college/university. Honestly I would suggest looking for women who go to church or appreciate more traditional life, or who have at least not been subjected to the Feminist religion. In my experience they are easier to get along with than young feminists, aren't as stuck up about sex and have a better understanding of the male-female relationship. My own relationship has been a hundred times better since I quit feminism and started exploring spirituality and traditional marriage advice.

Bodily form is not the only thing to focus on, unless you want a woman who is vain herself and cares only about that. Masculinity is communicated in other ways - make sure you hold yourself with good posture. Have a worthwhile mission or ambition to which to dedicate yourself, that's actually very attractive to women. A man who has no mission or ambition (outside of desiring a woman or wife) will bore a long-term partner. Whether us women like to admit it or not, we find value in ourselves by partnering with a man of value (which is a lot more than just pecs and high salary). You have to value yourself in a meaningful way. People seem to either love or hate Dr Jordan Peterson but I think there are a lot of young men living better lives because of his advice, could be worth trying.

I imagine it's quite difficult to meet women at the minute, what with covid shite and all. Here we're not allowed to leave our homes unless "essential" or meet with other households unless "essential" and limited to 6 people and there's no social groups, church or any kind of gathering permitted. Masks mandatory indoors in public places, you can't even flirt!


--------------------
LAGM2021
Trades

We may lose or we may win, but we'll never be here again


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Offlineyeah
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: Tattersail]
    #27132589 - 01/07/21 12:14 PM (16 days, 9 hours ago)

Quote:

Tattersail said:
Have a worthwhile mission or ambition to which to dedicate yourself




This one is hard for me. Ambition has never been part of my nature... I have a good heart (which at the end of the day seems to not count for anything with women) and there's things I've stuck with throughout life, mainly martial arts... but that's just a pass time. I could try my hand at being a coach and I'd like to do it, but the opportunities for it are so slim in a capitalist society.

Hopefully I'm not doomed to be a loveless, low value male.


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OfflinePotDaddy
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: yeah]
    #27133151 - 01/07/21 04:51 PM (16 days, 4 hours ago)

Quote:

yeah said:
Quote:

Tattersail said:
Have a worthwhile mission or ambition to which to dedicate yourself




This one is hard for me. Ambition has never been part of my nature... I have a good heart (which at the end of the day seems to not count for anything with women) and there's things I've stuck with throughout life, mainly martial arts... but that's just a pass time. I could try my hand at being a coach and I'd like to do it, but the opportunities for it are so slim in a capitalist society.

Hopefully I'm not doomed to be a loveless, low value male.




We had a saying in college, Nice guys finish last and SHY GUYS don't get laid!

Dude get some confidence. Honestly sometimes all it takes is the confidence to walk up to them and ask them out while smiling. Not creepily though.
If you are in as good shape as you say then have some pride in that just don't be one of THOSE guys.

Having a good heart Does count if you find the RIGHT one. Sadly too many young ones think money is most important.


Best of luck. Hang in there.


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Offlineyeah
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: PotDaddy]
    #27133196 - 01/07/21 05:12 PM (16 days, 4 hours ago)

I think you have me confused with the OP because I never said I was in great shape


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OfflineTattersail
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: yeah]
    #27143342 - 01/12/21 10:19 AM (11 days, 11 hours ago)

Quote:

yeah said:
Quote:

Tattersail said:
Have a worthwhile mission or ambition to which to dedicate yourself




This one is hard for me. Ambition has never been part of my nature... I have a good heart (which at the end of the day seems to not count for anything with women) and there's things I've stuck with throughout life, mainly martial arts... but that's just a pass time. I could try my hand at being a coach and I'd like to do it, but the opportunities for it are so slim in a capitalist society.

Hopefully I'm not doomed to be a loveless, low value male.





I suppose ambition on it's own isn't the valuable thing - it's the other things that go with it, like dedication, commitment, self-sacrifice, self-mastery, etc for your goals (doesn't have to have the end point of running a martial arts club if that's not of much interest to you). A dedicated routine in your training, goals of reaching the highest Dan in your art form, or just perfecting your skill at whatever level you're at. I have a lot of pride in my husband for achieving his first Dan and the level of commitment he had towards it. He's stopped now as he saw it pointless going any further with jujitsu and wants to try other sports. Plans may change, that's okay.

A good heart is worth a lot, and many years of martial arts is a valuable achievement.

I think part of the problem is that many young women are unavailable to Love. They don't want to tie themselves down early in their careers, give up their freedom, think about starting families, or carrying any weight beyond their own desires to ornament their own lives. Feminism teaches women to centre themselves, blame men for their failures, and almost never mentions love - the most valuable thing us humans can experience. So even if you're a great man, its going to be hard because the dating pool is much reduced. Many women have ridiculously high expectations also, as if all men should be flawless in every way.

I wish you luck in finding Love with a woman who values you (and not just for your looks, money or status!)


--------------------
LAGM2021
Trades

We may lose or we may win, but we'll never be here again


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Offlineyeah
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: Tattersail]
    #27144731 - 01/12/21 11:32 PM (10 days, 22 hours ago)

Love would be cool. What I could really use as a quick fix is just some intimacy but that goes back to what you said about women and their standards

my city has about 100k more single men than women, too
honestly it feels hopeless
I've been trying to give my number to girls at their work while I shop like Kryptos said but I don't think it's gonna work


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[


Edited by yeah (01/12/21 11:45 PM)


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InvisibleJokeshopbeardM
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Registered: 11/30/11
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: yeah]
    #27144812 - 01/13/21 12:47 AM (10 days, 20 hours ago)

Quote:

yeah said:
I've been trying to give my number to girls at their work while I shop like Kryptos said but I don't think it's gonna work



I doubt that would ever work. The trick is to get their number, not just give up your own.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


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InvisibleFiery
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: Tattersail]
    #27145075 - 01/13/21 07:24 AM (10 days, 14 hours ago)

Yeah, feminism is similar to racism. It contains blaming or hating people you probably know nothing about, and usually blindly, without any more information.

I'm all for empowering women, but I see feminism as just another form of control. Controlled by men? Well now you're controlled by women.


The solution in a relationship? Zero control- only goals. Love is an emotion, which a person can trick themselves into feeling without even realizing it's not real. Fooling yourself into love is dangerous and so many people fall into that trap.

Goals are real and obtainable and you can build a relationship of love on that.


One problem here is that as a blanket statement, women associate sex with love WAY more than men do. But sometimes it's the opposite.

A major important thing for a relationship is communication and honesty. At a certain point in life you'll realize sex is just a physical release of nerve endings in the body.

Relationships built on only sex ALWAYS fail- either that or both parties live a life of lies. You have to have trust and goals, which combined with sex = intimacy.


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OfflineNonagon Infinity
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: Fiery]
    #27145508 - 01/13/21 11:57 AM (10 days, 9 hours ago)

Quote:

Fiery said:
I'm all for empowering women, but I see feminism as just another form of control. Controlled by men? Well now you're controlled by women.




:whateverhuman:


--------------------
Nonagon Infinity Opens the Door


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InvisibleLynnch
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: Nonagon Infinity] * 1
    #27146070 - 01/13/21 04:42 PM (10 days, 5 hours ago)

I think if a chick lists "feminist" in their dating profile, it's probably because she's sick of dating pushy douchebags and is trying to scare them away. Feminist can mean a lot of things- sex positive feminists may have opposing views to SWERFs or TERFs. So going on about how "feminists believe blah di blah" or are to blame for all dating problems is just talking out of your ass.

Traditional/conservative/christian types are way more stuck up and uptight with 'conditions' that must be met. Girls that wont kiss you unless you're committed. :shake:


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OfflineKryptos
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Re: I'm handsome, a body builder, and STILL can't find a woman [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #27146364 - 01/13/21 07:52 PM (10 days, 1 hour ago)

Quote:

Jokeshopbeard said:
Quote:

yeah said:
I've been trying to give my number to girls at their work while I shop like Kryptos said but I don't think it's gonna work



I doubt that would ever work. The trick is to get their number, not just give up your own.




It works. It's definitely less successful than getting their number, but there are times when asking a girl for her number is very inappropriate/pushy, while giving out your number is almost never inappropriate.

The trick is to make her want to contact you first. That's not nearly as easy.

Then again, that's going to end up being the trick either way. If you get her number and she doesn't want to be in contact, she's just going to ignore you or give you the standard "haha" "ok" "yeah lol" non-responses.

If they do contact you after you give them your number, then going on a date from there is a no-brainer. You'd basically have to actively try to fuck it up to fail.


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