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RenegadeMycologist
On the case



Registered: 12/05/20
Posts: 3,817
Loc: Serbia
Last seen: 8 days, 11 hours
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Tell me INSANE jokes
#27082314 - 12/10/20 02:25 PM (3 years, 1 month ago) |
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Title says it all. Soon I will have 50 posts on shroomery and i will give 5 star rating to the person who delivers me most INSANE joke. Then i will share that joke with my mother. Go ahead.
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l e a r n i n g t h i n g s
Edited by RenegadeMycologist (12/10/20 02:26 PM)
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wrestler_az
PsiLLy BiLLy



Registered: 08/11/02
Posts: 13,676
Loc: day dreams of a mad man
Last seen: 11 hours, 32 minutes
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i would, but the voices say it's a trap.
-------------------- how's your WOW?
Edited by yageman (04/20/06 4:20 PM)
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Kmacmo
The aborted pin



Registered: 08/14/19
Posts: 1,675
Loc: Central hemisphere
Last seen: 6 hours, 41 minutes
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Why is Santa's sack so large? Because he only comes once a year
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unam sanctum


Registered: 04/20/11
Posts: 6,702
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which three two letter words mean small?
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gopher
Coffee Bean Extraordinaire



Registered: 11/22/17
Posts: 12,999
Loc: Canada
Last seen: 2 hours, 16 minutes
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go on it
-------------------- For most of the normies out there, an operating system is just a bootloader for Google Chrome. Since Disney has obtained tremendous value from the public domain, knows how important the public domain is, and is firmly determined to never contribute anything to it. My pronouns are He and Him, and my adjectives are Fat and Jazzy
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unam sanctum


Registered: 04/20/11
Posts: 6,702
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Re: Tell me INSANE jokes [Re: gopher]
#27082469 - 12/10/20 03:37 PM (3 years, 1 month ago) |
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is it in*
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feevers



Registered: 12/28/10
Posts: 8,546
Loc:
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My girlfriend stopped talking to me right when I started taking my schizophrenia meds.
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split_by_nine
i am the liquor

Registered: 07/11/18
Posts: 21,288
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How can you tell if your wife is dead?
The sex is the same but the dishes start piling up.
-------------------- 🐴 hpoo or die
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BANANA.MAN
Turd Ferguson

Registered: 01/11/15
Posts: 7,474
Loc: Ontario Canada
Last seen: 6 months, 2 days
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Two gay guys go camping.
Tent catches on fire.
Who gets out first, top or bottom?
Bottom. He already has his shit packed.
Not really insane but it's the only joke short enough to bother writing down that I can think of off the top of my head.
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blackhawk
Newton's Law of Majesticity



Registered: 04/02/11
Posts: 8,465
Loc: Where Jimmies are Rustled
Last seen: 4 hours, 39 minutes
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I saw a girl walking down the street that I fucked years ago, so I ran up behind her, covered her eyes and whispered, “Guess who… I took your virginity…
“She said, “Dad?”
“Dad?” I replied, staggering back in disgust. “You lost your virginity to your dad?”
She turned round and said, “Oh… It’s you… I told you that you were my first because I was ashamed of what happened with my…”
“I don’t want to hear it,” I interrupted. “Fuck you, and your dad.”
As I walked off, I turned round and shouted, “Tell him Uncle Tony won’t be coming round this Christmas.”
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BANANA.MAN
Turd Ferguson

Registered: 01/11/15
Posts: 7,474
Loc: Ontario Canada
Last seen: 6 months, 2 days
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Re: Tell me INSANE jokes [Re: blackhawk] 1
#27082923 - 12/10/20 08:05 PM (3 years, 1 month ago) |
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A baby seal walks into a bar
Bartender asks what he wants to drink
The seal pup sits down looking over his shoulder and nervously says "I'll take anything but a Canadian club"
A cow and her calves are out in a pasture, one calf asks her mom how she got her name. Her mother says when she was born a rose pedal fell onto her head so she named her Rose.
"What about me?" another calf asked, and the mother said when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head so she named her Daisy.
The third calf went "DUUUUUUH, I like straws and hats. DERRR."
And the mother yells "Shutup, Cinderblock!"
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koods
Ribbit



Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,049
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
Last seen: 19 minutes, 45 seconds
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Re: Tell me INSANE jokes [Re: BANANA.MAN] 1
#27082956 - 12/10/20 08:25 PM (3 years, 1 month ago) |
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Donald Trump
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NotSheekle said “if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”
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Icyurmt
Strange



Registered: 04/02/20
Posts: 1,625
Loc: 5a
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Re: Tell me INSANE jokes [Re: koods]
#27083058 - 12/10/20 09:19 PM (3 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
koods said: Donald Trump
Nailed it 😂
-------------------- 👁️ 🌊 why you are empty. Hunt for the habitat not the mushroom.
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GreenHorns
some kind of boogin



Registered: 10/03/12
Posts: 3,798
Loc: R'lyeh
Last seen: 10 months, 18 days
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Re: Tell me INSANE jokes [Re: Icyurmt] 2
#27083278 - 12/11/20 12:14 AM (3 years, 1 month ago) |
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Why do ladies wear makeup and perfume?
Because thier ugly and they smell bad.
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  As the spark of the dream ignites a flame of desire all we have is time and all to do is admire Spawning to Bulk Substate TEK General Myco Info / FAQ / Terminology
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Loaded Shaman
Psychophysiologist



Registered: 03/02/15
Posts: 8,006
Loc: Now O'Clock
Last seen: 28 days, 4 hours
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Guy goes to the brothel and says to the Madame, "I want something really kinky."
Madame says, "No problem, $100, first door on the left."
Guy walks in the room - in which there's only a chicken - and says, "Well I guess I asked for it, I'll do the chicken."
Guy comes back next week and says, "The chicken was okay but give me something different but still kinky."
Madame says, "No problem, $200, second door on the left."
Guy walks in and there's other guys watching two lesbians make love behind a two way mirror.
Chicken guy says to the guy next to him, "This is amazing ... I've never seen anything like it."
Other guy says, "This is nothing. You should have been here last week. Some guy was fucking a chicken!"
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  "Real knowledge is to know the extent of one’s ignorance." — Confucius
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Ice9
3X Ban Lotto Champion



Registered: 03/20/14
Posts: 11,232
Loc: daterapeville,USA
Last seen: 1 hour, 9 minutes
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A priest, a Rabbi and an Atheist walk into a bar. They all turn into Bose-Einstein condensates.
Hope that's insane enough, or I misinterpreted your use of all caps insane.
-------------------- The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man. -- George Brenard Shaw
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yeah


Registered: 02/08/09
Posts: 3,729
Last seen: 1 month, 21 days
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Free Palestine? I'll take two!
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Barnaby
Interesting lifetime


Registered: 12/13/17
Posts: 9,136
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blessed


Registered: 07/16/11
Posts: 1,085
Loc: ation: Tasmania
Last seen: 13 days, 10 hours
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Re: Tell me INSANE jokes [Re: Barnaby]
#27084379 - 12/11/20 05:19 PM (3 years, 1 month ago) |
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Maybe more of a insanely dad joke but here's two for you.
Where did they find Saddam Hussein cd collection?
In a rack.
And one one Saddam Hussein joke.
While being interrogated, he was asked, "Saddam you've done a lot of bad things, is there anything you would not do?". Saddam Hussein replies,
"Yes, I'd never bag dad".
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