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Nonagon Infinity
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Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? 5
#26997224 - 10/22/20 01:12 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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I know there are a few older users here on the Shroomery, and I'd love to hear from you all on this subject matter. Of course, I encourage anyone to reply if you have your own useful 2 cents, but I feel like insight from more older users will be particularly useful here.
My first trip happened when I was 19. I took about 1.7 dried grams of cubensis with a close friend, and it was a fantastic experience. We giggled all day, I enjoyed visual distortions and the altered perspective on reality. Most of my trips when I was around that age came from a place of curiosity and excitement. Psychedelics were a very social experience for me, and it was mostly a recreational experience. I wasn't really aware of the possibility of using these drugs for anything outside of spicing up a fun weekend with friends. I think this was mostly due to being influenced by the people I was hanging out with. Most of the people I hung out with during this arc of my life had pretty serious drug problems (as did I). One of them even told me that tripping alone was a bad idea, and that it would probably give me a bad trip.
As I said, I had a drug problem... Though I was experimenting with psychedelics, I was also really into speed and research chemicals. This situation escalated, and reached a peak one winter evening when I combined some speed with too many caffeinated drinks. My heart stopped and I lost consciousness as I vomited in a bathroom. Thankfully, I had a friend who came in and checked on me (the same friend who I tripped with for the first time). He saw the condition I was in, did CPR, called 911, and saved my life. This experience made me seriously reconsider my relationship with drugs of all kinds, and I stayed completely sober for a couple years. I also stopped spending time with the drug addicts I was hanging out with.
When I was 21, I developed a romantic partnership with a woman who lived down the street from me. As I got to know her better, I discovered that she was pretty into psychedelics, and she seemed to have a different kind of relationship with them. They weren't a social activity for her: they were a tool. I was shocked to hear that she preferred to trip alone (the idea of tripping alone scared me due to my previous influences), and she was sincere when she told me how much these substances had benefited her. Since I was still really scared about tripping alone, she re-introduced me to psychedelics in a more calm setting. She was my trip-sitter for a couple of mushroom trips and for one extremely challenging LSD trip, and I started to realize that there was much more to these substances than I had originally thought.
Fast-forward a few more years, and I'm now 27 years old. Over time, I developed the courage to trip on my own and, these days, I prefer it. I find that solo-tripping is a much more personal experience, and there is great insight to be found in the psychedelic experience when reflecting on my experiences with a sober mind (integration). I still enjoy tripping with other people, but tripping with others tends to de-emphasize the personal insight in favor of the group dynamic. I trip with other people when I have friends who want to trip, but who don't want to do it alone, or if I'm looking for a social bonding experience with people I love and trust.
I started reading some psychedelic literature. I read LSD: My Problem Child by Albert Hofmann, The Doors of Perception by Aldous Huxley, True Hallucinations by Terence McKenna, and other fantastic books. When I read How To Change Your Mind by Michael Pollan, I realized that psychedelics could be useful even towards the end of one's life. That book is a personal story of Michael Pollan's new-found relationship with psychedelics as he approached sixty years of age, and reading it is what really got me thinking about my relationship with psychedelics in the long-term. I've realized that a goal of mine is to maintain a sustainable and healthy relationship with psychedelics throughout my life. I never want to reach a point in my life where I no longer consider them a possibility.
In the present moment, I feel very excited about psychedelics. Lately, I've found myself tripping more often (especially since I learned how to cultivate mushrooms). It's been great, and I've been integrating my experiences well via journaling and sharing my experiences with people who care about me. However, there is a lingering worry that I might go too far with it. I don't want to get to a point where I'm taking too much, or tripping too frequently. My current rhythm is about once or twice a month. Like I said, I'm really happy with where I'm at with psychedelics, but I want that relationship to be sustainable in the long term. I realize that the healthy relationship I currently have with psychedelics is not something I ought to take for granted, and that it can become an unhealthy relationship if I'm not careful or respectful.
So, my question for more experienced psychonauts is: what have you done to maintain a healthy relationship with psychedelics in the long term? Do you have any advice for someone like me, who is just now discovering how beautiful these substances really are? What does it mean to you to have a healthy relationship with psychedelics?
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nooneman


Registered: 04/24/09
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Loc: Utah
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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: Nonagon Infinity]
#26997230 - 10/22/20 01:21 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Most people quit around 30 or so, or when they get a family or other major responsibilities like that. It's often simply about time, they have too little time and too much to do, so psychedelics naturally end up disappearing from their lives over time. I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing. You'll always remember and value the experiences you've had, no matter what happens.
I know others will have different perspectives, but I personally think one key thing is to give up all other drugs, along with alcohol, nicotine, etc. After that, cutting back your use to a couple of times a year. RR used to say that taking a high dose once a year was the best way. I use a bit more than that, but I like the general sentiment, and I could see myself eventually reaching that point.
No matter what happens or what you decide in the future, you'll never lose what you've experienced with psychedelics. Those experiences will always be with you, enhancing your life. That's something I didn't really understand until I was older. Don't be afraid of change.
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Nonagon Infinity
Mycologist



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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: nooneman]
#26997235 - 10/22/20 01:31 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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nooneman said: Most people quit around 30 or so, or when they get a family or other major responsibilities like that. It's often simply about time, they have too little time and too much to do, so psychedelics naturally end up disappearing from their lives over time. I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing. You'll always remember and value the experiences you've had, no matter what happens.
That makes a lot of sense. Right now, I'm single and I don't have kids. The only responsibility I really have is my job, and that still gives me plenty of time to trip. Going back to Michael Pollan, he used psychedelics in his college days, but returned back to it when he was getting close to sixty years old, well after his son became an adult and after a very successful career as a journalist and author. I'm sure he got to a point where he started to have more time for psychedelic experiences.
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nooneman said: I know others will have different perspectives, but I personally think one key thing is to give up all other drugs, along with alcohol, nicotine, etc. After that, cutting back your use to a couple of times a year. RR used to say that taking a high dose once a year was the best way. I use a bit more than that, but I like the general sentiment, and I could see myself eventually reaching that point.
Fortunately, I'm already a step ahead on that front. I've never been a nicotine user (I've tried it, but never got the appeal), and I haven't had alcohol in about three years. I don't smoke weed anymore, either, which was mostly a financial decision at first, but now I've found that my tolerance is so low that it's extremely uncomfortable to use it, so I've just let it go. Mushrooms are the only drug I consume consistently (I will rarely go for an LSD trip - only had four of those in my life). I prefer to spend most of my waking life here on earth as a sober man 
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nooneman said: No matter what happens or what you decide in the future, you'll never lose what you've experienced with psychedelics. Those experiences will always be with you, enhancing your life. That's something I didn't really understand until I was older. Don't be afraid of change.
That's great insight. Unlike alcohol, psychedelics aren't about forgetting or blurring the past. Most of my trips have been extremely memorable experiences, and I learn new things about them every time I put time into re-visiting them in my memory.
Thanks for your thoughtful comment!
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Northerner
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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: Nonagon Infinity] 3
#26997255 - 10/22/20 02:20 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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I've been using psychedelics on and off for maybe 25 years. For me it comes and goes. Some years I'll trip very often, other years irregularly, other years not at all. Sometimes I'll forget about psychedelics for years, then suddenly I'll want it again and I'll find myself in another psychedelic romance.
I've always approached it in a very ad hoc way. If it feels good I do it, if it feels uninteresting or bad I don't do it. Pretty simple really. Not to say that I haven't overdone it before and given myself a fright, but I haven't abused it to the point that it's become detrimental to me.
Though I've got kids and a career and stuff now I still make time for tripping from time to time. I reckon life is a bit more interesting with psychedelic insight. Drinkers and general public can be so trivial and boring. It's good to keep things interesting.
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The nearest we ever come to knowing truth is when we are witness to paradox.
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Vibe_Enthusiast
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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: Northerner] 1
#26997350 - 10/22/20 05:35 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Awesome post. Was actually a really good read and you really painted the picture on how you're coming at this question. So, I'm 27 as well, but I do have a ton of experiences under my belt. I know people in their 50s and 60s may be able to address your long time interest in the substances - but my two cents is that everyone is different!!!
I went through this phase where I was tripping every weekend on a pretty high to moderate dose - 4g cubensis. Things were going well, I was learning more about myself than I ever have.. questioning all the right things like the placement of my friends that I keep in life. Who I needed to get rid of, who I needed to keep around. Reevaluating my interactions with other people I care about. It was an academy of life I was attending every weekend!
Now, on one of these I had a TROUBLED trip . It ripped me apart. Inside and out. It devastated me. I thought so little of myself. I thought of all the bad and terrible things I have said to people over the years. It brought me to my knees. I couldn't take it. It was a movie playing over and over showing me what a terrible person I honestly have been - but bury it so deep down (not that I'm an actual bad person, but it took every event that I ever hurt someone and blasted me with it).
After that trip - I didn't trip for MONTHS . It gave me such a reality check. I couldn't believe it. It almost gave me PTSD with mushrooms. I just recently had my latest trip on 1.5 cubensis and I had to literally talk myself into it all day (like most trips regardless).. but this one was different. I knew I got put through the ringer. But I took that dose and all was well. Actually made me feel so amazing and full of love, energy, bliss. It was magical.
That was about 2.5 months ago. I'm going to take another dose here shortly.. in the realm of 3.5/4g once again and see what happens. Mo intent. No judgement. Just going to see what it brings to the table.
I guess the moral of the story is - sometimes you only need one big trip to make you understand the whole thing. I wpuld love to keep a healthy relationship long term with these substances .. but I do believe there is that possibility of not needing to at some point. Different strokes for different folks. We are still young, so time will tell. But there's definitely the phases of tripping often and tripping every once in a blue moon.
Tread lightly. These little buggers are just waiting for a rude awakening. Im so happy I had that trip though. It built me more and gave me more than I ever have gotten from a full blown laughing blast (though those trips are also very very therapeutic). Nothing like an authentic laugh. So good for the soul.
Good look on your journey buddy.. sounds just like me when I began this.
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Socrateshroom
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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: Vibe_Enthusiast]
#26997489 - 10/22/20 08:12 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Vibe! Hope all is well, good to see you around these parts more often again and glad you're back on the psychedelic train!
Regarding your question Nonagon, I feel Vibe and Northerner have painted a wonderful picture of the sort of general timeline of a psychedelic relationship.
I'm a bit older than you and Vibe (only by a few years) but I know that I'm far less experienced (I was late to the game and didn't start diving in until a little over 2 years ago, although I had my first experience about 4 years ago). But I can see, on a small scale, exactly what Northerner is saying. There are times where I trip more often, or harder. Then there are times where I trip little, with milder doses, or not at all.
None of that changes my love for psychedelics. Life has an unpredictable flow to it at times. And even if we want to trip today, life takes us away for years where we don't have the opportunity to trip or sometimes even think about it. Obviously I experience that only on a small scale, maybe forgetting about it for a month or a few at a time and then going right back into it. But I can see how, with much in life, the gaps in interaction with said thing ebb and flow as life pulls and pushes you in different directions.
I think for me, one of the important reasons I foresee it in my life indefinitely, is that I love growing as much as I love to trip (maybe I like growing them even more). Just watching it grow is still miraculous to me and gives me its own sort of "high". I know I'll have different gaps between trips, some longer and some shorter, but as long as I love to grow, they'll be in my life.
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redgreenvines
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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: Nonagon Infinity]
#26997528 - 10/22/20 08:50 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Such tremendous luck to discover a mate on your block who has made psychedelic opportunities blossom for you.
I would consult further with her in everything if I were you and the gate were still open to her.
otherwise, the term "drug problem" is a matter of perspective. From what perspective would you use that term, and if not then perhaps it is not a relevant term in your life, even if others consider you have a drug problem and keep their distance.
as for a relationship with drugs, set your boundaries and stick to them, this holds for all relationships, respect boundaries and be a good host.
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skOsH
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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: redgreenvines]
#26997543 - 10/22/20 09:03 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Psychedelics for me are always a tool, and I almost always trip alone...if I haven't tripped in a while, I don't tend to like group trips unless its a low dose.
I think I am okay with not doing them. I mean, I am going to put absolute minimal effort in my daily life without them, since they were the only thing to help me if I used them occasionally (~2-4 times/year maybe), but yeah...not sure if they're necessarily for me.
That's good you found a way to trip often, but if it's going to be every other week or so I would try to incorporate lion's mane and then you shouldn't have to trip as often, or you should be able to regenerate neuron growth more strongly. Not sure though--although psilocybin facilitates neurogenesis and lion's mane kind of maintains it, from what I understand via studies. Everyone trips differently...I don't think there are two people that even trip the same if they both did it solo and you compared the two.
It's why I live alone and I don't even trip anymore because...well, I don't really go outside. Too scary for me with my ptsd, in terms of others lol. Doesn't even have to do with the current state of the world, I just don't like people. I'll stick to going out for like, 5 mins every two days. xD
Was totally a different person when I tripped. Was definitely more social and I could handle...life lol
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Nonagon Infinity
Mycologist



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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: Northerner]
#26997871 - 10/22/20 12:31 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Northerner said: I've been using psychedelics on and off for maybe 25 years. For me it comes and goes. Some years I'll trip very often, other years irregularly, other years not at all. Sometimes I'll forget about psychedelics for years, then suddenly I'll want it again and I'll find myself in another psychedelic romance.
Nice - another example of how psychedelics are such a personal experience for everyone who uses them. It's also reassuring to know that you can still find the romance in psychedelics even after 25 years.
Quote:
Northerner said: Though I've got kids and a career and stuff now I still make time for tripping from time to time. I reckon life is a bit more interesting with psychedelic insight. Drinkers and general public can be so trivial and boring. It's good to keep things interesting.
The comments about drinkers and keeping things interesting are super relatable. It's also nice to know that you've still found time to have these experiences amidst the responsibilities of parenthood.
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Nonagon Infinity
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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: Vibe_Enthusiast]
#26997887 - 10/22/20 12:39 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Vibe_Enthusiast said: Tread lightly. These little buggers are just waiting for a rude awakening. Im so happy I had that trip though. It built me more and gave me more than I ever have gotten from a full blown laughing blast (though those trips are also very very therapeutic). Nothing like an authentic laugh. So good for the soul.
Thanks for sharing all of your stories here - I appreciate your perspective. I have yet to have a super challenging mushroom trip on my own (I had one earlier this summer, but it was primarily because it was with someone else and there were some very unexpected complications in our relationship that came up while we were tripping). I have had two extremely challenging LSD trips, so I definitely have a much more cautious relationship with LSD than I do with mushrooms right now. I have definitely seen the value in a challenging trip (they can be extremely therapeutic, as you said), so I'm not afraid of that. My current approach is usually just to let go and let the mushroom take me wherever it takes me, and to trust that I will get through it, no matter how upsetting or frightening it might get.
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Nonagon Infinity
Mycologist



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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: Socrateshroom]
#26997901 - 10/22/20 12:45 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Socrateshroom said: I think for me, one of the important reasons I foresee it in my life indefinitely, is that I love growing as much as I love to trip (maybe I like growing them even more). Just watching it grow is still miraculous to me and gives me its own sort of "high". I know I'll have different gaps between trips, some longer and some shorter, but as long as I love to grow, they'll be in my life.
That's a really cool sentiment, and I empathize with that a lot. I love growing mushrooms. I've found it to be a really rewarding hobby, even if I don't trip. Sharing the mushrooms I grow with people I love and care about has been a super rewarding experience.
I think there's also something to be said for the related "highs" you experience while sober between trips. Integrating my experiences via journaling, talking to other people, and posting on this forum comes with its own "high". I'm at the point where I actually like integrating my psychedelic experiences more than I like tripping itself!
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Nonagon Infinity
Mycologist



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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: redgreenvines]
#26997906 - 10/22/20 12:53 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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redgreenvines said: Such tremendous luck to discover a mate on your block who has made psychedelic opportunities blossom for you.
I would consult further with her in everything if I were you and the gate were still open to her.
The gate is still open with her, but it's quite complicated. Our relationship became quite toxic towards the end, and escalated to a point where she cheated on me with her roommate. It hurt me so badly that I couldn't speak to her for years. However, last winter, she actually reached out to me. Turns out that she moved to another state with this roommate, and she's in an abusive relationship with him (I always knew that guy was serious trouble). I had a long phone call with her where we caught up about stuff, and that was really cool in a number of ways. She started reaching out to me some more after that, but I realized that it's still just too sensitive for me right now to maintain any kind of relationship with her, and I communicated that to her. Maybe one day, it'll be easier for us to communicate, but for right now, I think it's best if we just live our own lives separately.
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redgreenvines said: as for a relationship with drugs, set your boundaries and stick to them, this holds for all relationships, respect boundaries and be a good host.
Such simple advice, but it rings so true. I would probably benefit from taking some time to sit down and figure out what my boundaries are when it comes to psychedelics. Thanks for your insight!
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Nonagon Infinity
Mycologist



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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: skOsH]
#26997917 - 10/22/20 12:56 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
skOsH said: It's why I live alone and I don't even trip anymore because...well, I don't really go outside. Too scary for me with my ptsd, in terms of others lol. Doesn't even have to do with the current state of the world, I just don't like people. I'll stick to going out for like, 5 mins every two days. xD
Was totally a different person when I tripped. Was definitely more social and I could handle...life lol
That sounds really tough. Sorry to hear you've been dealing with PTSD. I have no idea what PTSD feels like, but my heart goes out to you either way. I hope you're able to find some healing in your life from that.
-------------------- Nonagon Infinity Opens the Door
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tyrannicalrex
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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: Nonagon Infinity]
#26997985 - 10/22/20 01:39 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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PrimalSoup
hyperspatial illuminations



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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: Nonagon Infinity] 4
#26998951 - 10/23/20 12:36 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Nonagon Infinity said: So, my question for more experienced psychonauts is: what have you done to maintain a healthy relationship with psychedelics in the long term? Do you have any advice for someone like me, who is just now discovering how beautiful these substances really are? What does it mean to you to have a healthy relationship with psychedelics?
Just one word: respect. 
I first tripped at about 21, 44 years ago (!), with liberty caps and some good friends. Since then I've done mushrooms well over a thousand times, almost always solo. I can easily recall details of many of them, with the higher dosages etched vividly in memory, somewhere outside of time.
I continue to work with them because, well, hyperspace never gets old.
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OutsideOfMyMind
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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: Nonagon Infinity] 2
#26999034 - 10/23/20 02:52 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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What a great post to read. I honestly don't think there is anything wrong with tripping once or twice a month if you can get your hands on it. I personally try to take psychedelics at least once a month because I feel it gives my emotions and my stress level a reset. I also feel like I learn how to deal with my own reality better.
What kind of doses are you taking?
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Vibe_Enthusiast
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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: Nonagon Infinity]
#26999271 - 10/23/20 08:06 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Nonagon Infinity said:
Quote:
Vibe_Enthusiast said: Tread lightly. These little buggers are just waiting for a rude awakening. Im so happy I had that trip though. It built me more and gave me more than I ever have gotten from a full blown laughing blast (though those trips are also very very therapeutic). Nothing like an authentic laugh. So good for the soul.
Thanks for sharing all of your stories here - I appreciate your perspective. I have yet to have a super challenging mushroom trip on my own (I had one earlier this summer, but it was primarily because it was with someone else and there were some very unexpected complications in our relationship that came up while we were tripping). I have had two extremely challenging LSD trips, so I definitely have a much more cautious relationship with LSD than I do with mushrooms right now. I have definitely seen the value in a challenging trip (they can be extremely therapeutic, as you said), so I'm not afraid of that. My current approach is usually just to let go and let the mushroom take me wherever it takes me, and to trust that I will get through it, no matter how upsetting or frightening it might get.
You've got the right mindset buddy! Glad to see you're apart of the community. You seem to be someone I will be hearing from regularly with your experiences!
@Socrateshroom -
Hope you have been well brother! Nice to see your posts again as well. I've just been staying busy and whatnot. Weird times we are in right now so kind of keeping tbe mind busy with work and hobbies haha. You also gave great insight. Always a real one
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Vibe_Enthusiast
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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: OutsideOfMyMind]
#26999273 - 10/23/20 08:07 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
OutsideOfMyMind said: What kind of doses are you taking?
I am too, curious!
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Nonagon Infinity
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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: OutsideOfMyMind]
#26999483 - 10/23/20 10:56 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
OutsideOfMyMind said: What a great post to read. I honestly don't think there is anything wrong with tripping once or twice a month if you can get your hands on it. I personally try to take psychedelics at least once a month because I feel it gives my emotions and my stress level a reset. I also feel like I learn how to deal with my own reality better.
Yeah, once or twice a month definitely doesn't feel like it's too much, given my life circumstances. Doesn't get in the way of my work or any of my other responsibilities. It really only seems to enhance my life for the time being 
Quote:
OutsideOfMyMind said: What kind of doses are you taking?
Not very high ones. My favorite dosage right now is 2.5 dried grams of average variety p. cubensis. Most of the time, at this dosage, it gets me to either a level 2 or 3 trip. This Sunday, I'm going to start exploring a little deeper with 3.6 dried grams of cubensis. Hoping for a strong level 3 or maybe level 4 trip. I have taken 3.6 dried grams before, but it was with some friends, never on my own. I'm really excited for it!
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LosTresOjos
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Re: Maintaining a long term relationship with psychedelics? [Re: Nonagon Infinity]
#27000285 - 10/23/20 07:06 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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When i was 18 i tried some mushrooms. When i took them i thought, well i'm going to get high, lets have fun. What followed was one of the most bizarre experiences i have had. I went through so many emotions during the course of the trip. During the trip i thought about my anxiety that i would have from just walking down the street. I realized that it didn't matter and my anxiety was foolish. I went on another trip a few months later. I had a few trips here and there but it wasn't until i was 30 when i started to not only hit it hard but go up in dosage. I already knew that it worked as a medicine of sorts. It relieved my anxiety. After about 3 years of hitting the trips hard i now only trip a few times a year. Maybe only twice now. That could change but there so much to work on, at least that's what i see. I have thought about it now that i'm getting older, i don't want to go on a half ass trip but i'm also weary of going on my usual dose range. It seems like i have to gather everything i have in order to trip now. I still do it but it just seems to be getting harder and harder to take that first plunge.
I feel as if i have to train my mind to focus. In the past i have just allowed the experience to sweep by but these days i try to interact and be with the experience instead of observing. If that makes any sense.
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