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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy?
#26972650 - 10/06/20 05:52 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Your buddy and you go way back. He's not you bestest buddy but, you guys are solid friends for many years.
When he called you "Drop everything you were doing! We have the opportunity to partake in a DMT Virola snuff in the Amazon with a newly discovered tribe!" you didnt hesitate, packed your bags and off you both went.
Buddies.
So there you're sitting in the Amazon blowing DMT snuff into each others noses and rolling around flailing your limbs on the mossy forest floor with the rest of the tribe.
Then it goes all wrong!
Apparently you and your buddy break a very serious tribal taboo by shouting out loud the name of a cursed ancestor.
Both you and your buddy are caught and tied up. Poison tipped spears are aimed. Shouting ensues, translated by the French priest who is your interpreter. Now, you are the only one who speaks French, so you can hear whats being said but not your buddy.
You are the only one hearing this!
The Shaman says: "You broke the ultimate taboo! For this, either we will spear your buddy to death, or, the choice is up to you, you get to live but we make the Sacred Spider bite you on the dick. It will burn like fire for twenty days and you may want to cut it off because it hurts so much and after that you cannot get it up for a year. But: your buddy and you will live. Behold: The Sacred Spider!" They open a basket and sweet mother of shit!

What will you decide?
.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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Duhrwood Stevens
Gauche Chemoorganoheterotroph



Registered: 09/28/18
Posts: 410
Loc: Allupin Sideya
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante] 3
#26972652 - 10/06/20 05:54 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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u r a mod?
-------------------- Last seen 12/2/2020
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Crazy_Horse
I’m Rick James, bitch!


Registered: 08/15/16
Posts: 13,283
Loc: Hampsterdam
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante]
#26972656 - 10/06/20 05:56 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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--------------------
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Duhrwood Stevens] 1
#26972657 - 10/06/20 05:56 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Duhrwood Stevens said: u r a mod?
Ah, nooo!
I'm an admin
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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Crazy_Horse
I’m Rick James, bitch!


Registered: 08/15/16
Posts: 13,283
Loc: Hampsterdam
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Duhrwood Stevens] 10
#26972659 - 10/06/20 05:58 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Duhrwood Stevens said: u r a mod?
You insulted the tribal chief. Bring out the spiders.
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante]
#26972676 - 10/06/20 06:12 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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I'm surprised this would be a question at all for anyone.
Non-lethal/non-lasting injury vs a friend dying?
Total no-brainer (even if no-boner!)!!
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
#26972695 - 10/06/20 06:23 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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We'll see if a divide arises.
20 days of excruciating pain and a year of impotence by having been bit on the dick by a monster from your worst nightmares is quite severe too.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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budmanman
OTD Masterbater



Registered: 02/07/07
Posts: 17,975
Loc: PNW
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante] 1
#26972718 - 10/06/20 06:31 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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This fangs are massive I am not letting a spider bight my dick under any circumstance.
-------------------- Everything I have ever said is total bogus bs I am full of crud therefore everything I say should never be taken literal. And I am mentally unstable.
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: budmanman] 3
#26972721 - 10/06/20 06:34 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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I hereby submit that any man who would let a friend die over a temporary situation for himself is a coward.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
#26972732 - 10/06/20 06:38 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
budmanman said: This fangs are massive I am not letting a spider bight my dick under any circumstance.
Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said: I hereby submit that any man who would let a friend die over a temporary situation for himself is a coward.
He has plans for that dick.
Seriously, its quite an extreme temporary situation.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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The Blind Ass
Bodhi



Registered: 08/16/16
Posts: 26,657
Loc: The Primordial Mind
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante] 1
#26972737 - 10/06/20 06:39 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Plot twist - spider becomes one with your dick - & you become a dickspider.
-------------------- Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps
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SARAtonin
Violent Dreams


Registered: 09/28/11
Posts: 15,907
Loc: Deutschland
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante]
#26972740 - 10/06/20 06:40 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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No STAL option
-------------------- God kills indiscriminately and so shall we. For no creatures under God are as we are none so like him as ourselves. Want to join a cult? Click for details…
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: SARAtonin]
#26972743 - 10/06/20 06:42 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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There is a STAL option.. and my apologies for the gendercentric question!
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante]
#26972780 - 10/06/20 07:06 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Asante said: Seriously, its quite an extreme temporary situation.
Going a year without being able to fuck is 'extreme'?
Jesus I went eighteen months just to test myself.
We must have different definitions of extreme.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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spirit_shadow
Feature not a bug



Registered: 08/15/11
Posts: 25,665
Last seen: 1 hour, 52 minutes
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
#26972785 - 10/06/20 07:09 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said:
Quote:
Asante said: Seriously, its quite an extreme temporary situation.
Going a year without being able to fuck is 'extreme'?
Jesus I went eighteen months just to test myself.
We must have different definitions of extreme.
I've been 11 months apart from my girl because of covid this year. Shit sucks
-------------------- ERROR 418 IM A TEAPOT.....(this account is automated, all posts related to illegal activities or advice thereof are strictly from numerous online sites and are for informational purposes only)- Circa 2011 Ban lotto
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: spirit_shadow]
#26972794 - 10/06/20 07:14 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Would you kill your buddy for a fuck right now?
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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budmanman
OTD Masterbater



Registered: 02/07/07
Posts: 17,975
Loc: PNW
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
#26972800 - 10/06/20 07:21 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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That depends, is a spider about to bite my dick if I don't?
-------------------- Everything I have ever said is total bogus bs I am full of crud therefore everything I say should never be taken literal. And I am mentally unstable.
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
#26972802 - 10/06/20 07:22 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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It is the whole enormous tarantula driving enormous fangs in your dick fillimng it with venom so painful that for 20 days you just want to cut it off to be rid of the pain.
Dont overlook that part.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante]
#26972822 - 10/06/20 07:38 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Meh. There's still the death of a friend overhanging this whole thing.
No contest IMO. Pain is just pain. Look at how dogs deal with it; whine and moan until it goes away.
Humans, LOL.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Ezuma
Gontish Wizard



Registered: 12/02/13
Posts: 8,423
Loc: Roke
Last seen: 10 months, 20 days
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante] 1
#26972826 - 10/06/20 07:40 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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this is why I stay away from cultural traditions...
clearly the only moral answer is to accept the spider bite, which luckily you couldn't take back. sounds like both me and my friend are dumbshits in this scenario tho
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PatrickKn


Registered: 07/10/11
Posts: 20,563
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante] 12
#26972933 - 10/06/20 09:18 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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spirit_shadow
Feature not a bug



Registered: 08/15/11
Posts: 25,665
Last seen: 1 hour, 52 minutes
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: PatrickKn]
#26972940 - 10/06/20 09:30 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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If we BOTH shouted the name then why dont we BOTH get death
Also, I would choose to sacrifice myself( death) because I would rather die than let a giant spider bite my dick
-------------------- ERROR 418 IM A TEAPOT.....(this account is automated, all posts related to illegal activities or advice thereof are strictly from numerous online sites and are for informational purposes only)- Circa 2011 Ban lotto
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Northerner
splelling chceker


Registered: 07/29/12
Posts: 14,141
Loc: FNQ
Last seen: 54 minutes, 13 seconds
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: spirit_shadow] 1
#26973051 - 10/06/20 11:14 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Next time do the DMT snuff at home where it's nice and safe.
--------------------
The nearest we ever come to knowing truth is when we are witness to paradox.
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GreenHorns
some kind of boogin



Registered: 10/03/12
Posts: 3,798
Loc: R'lyeh
Last seen: 10 months, 18 days
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante] 2
#26973144 - 10/07/20 02:49 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Asante said: There is a STAL option.. and my apologies for the gendercentric question!
Dick and/or labia.
My dick is pretty useless already. Bring out the spider. I'd like to think I can kill the spider afterwards for biting my dick though. What's the punishment for trampling the sacred spider?
--------------------
  As the spark of the dream ignites a flame of desire all we have is time and all to do is admire Spawning to Bulk Substate TEK General Myco Info / FAQ / Terminology
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: PatrickKn] 1
#26973151 - 10/07/20 03:02 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
PatrickKn said:

Classical Asante hypothetical
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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birdeatingspider
Stranger in Paradise



Registered: 12/18/14
Posts: 2,988
Loc: so many roads
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante]
#26973187 - 10/07/20 03:58 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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I eat the spider. Boom
--------------------
From all I may be, or have been before, To mingle with the Universe, and feel What I can ne’er express, yet cannot all conceal.
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Tripsurfer
Bring Back Asante!



Registered: 08/01/12
Posts: 7,129
Loc: West of Windward
Last seen: 3 months, 27 days
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: birdeatingspider]
#26973260 - 10/07/20 05:30 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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I would explain in French that my buddie volunteers for spiderdick to safe his own life
-------------------- Ach en wee ben ik de klos, met mijn boog schoot ik een albatros... A philosopher is a person who knows less and less about more and more, until he knows nothing about everything.

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charlie07
Stranger


Registered: 07/16/20
Posts: 34
Loc: brooklyn
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Tripsurfer]
#26973798 - 10/07/20 01:04 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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ill do any thing 4 my friend
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Ice9
3X Ban Lotto Champion



Registered: 03/20/14
Posts: 11,232
Loc: daterapeville,USA
Last seen: 2 hours, 14 minutes
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: charlie07]
#26973887 - 10/07/20 01:55 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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I'd take the hit for my buddy, but probably die of terror long before I was even bitten. Fucking spiders, also the particular spider's bite is equivalent to a wasp sting for humans, not that bad. (It looks like a Goliath Birdeater)
-------------------- The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man. -- George Brenard Shaw
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Tripsurfer
Bring Back Asante!



Registered: 08/01/12
Posts: 7,129
Loc: West of Windward
Last seen: 3 months, 27 days
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Ice9] 1
#26973917 - 10/07/20 02:09 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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I have zero issues with spiders but for some reason grasshoppers creep me out
-------------------- Ach en wee ben ik de klos, met mijn boog schoot ik een albatros... A philosopher is a person who knows less and less about more and more, until he knows nothing about everything.

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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Tripsurfer]
#26973947 - 10/07/20 02:29 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Locusts!
Are you an Egyptian?
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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TranceDaDude
Stranger
Registered: 08/17/20
Posts: 53
Last seen: 3 years, 2 months
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante]
#26974139 - 10/07/20 04:39 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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I'd stab the fuck out of my buddy.
Why the fuck did you bring me to some amazon tribal shit where a spider is going to bite my dick!? YOU ASSHOLE
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twighead
mͯó



Registered: 08/27/08
Posts: 29,556
Loc: Glenn Gould's Fuck Windmill
Last seen: 12 minutes, 4 seconds
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: TranceDaDude]
#26974606 - 10/07/20 10:13 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Okay okay how about this one:
You're in Mongolia - and you've been captured by a group of Khan fanatics who haven't seen civilization for 700 years.
They give you the choice of either having a random bottle of either camel semen or cayenne pepper juice sprayed in your eyes every 5 hours, you also get pegged by the chieftians daughters alternating every 6 hours... one is 4'2" with a 8 inch dick and the other is 7'2" with a 2 inch dick.
Or you can refuse and your friend gets killed by dripping 1 drop of molten gold into his bhole and mouth alternating every 10 minutes.
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twighead
mͯó



Registered: 08/27/08
Posts: 29,556
Loc: Glenn Gould's Fuck Windmill
Last seen: 12 minutes, 4 seconds
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante]
#26974608 - 10/07/20 10:15 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Asante said: Locusts!
Are you an Egyptian?
Locusts and grasshoppers are ackhewally different
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Shiithead
Your Huckleberry



Registered: 04/05/13
Posts: 9,997
Loc: God's Flat Green Earth
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: twighead]
#26974625 - 10/07/20 10:33 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Asante, stop doing MXE if you're not gonna share.
--------------------
Ephesians 6:12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Psalm 12:6 The words of the Lord are pure words: as silver tried in a furnace of earth, purified seven times. Hebrews 11:3 Through faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that things which are seen were not made of things which do appear. Revelation 3:11 Behold, I come quickly: hold that fast which thou hast, that no man take thy crown.
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Hikeadellic
Fungi Fan



Registered: 08/31/20
Posts: 1,227
Loc: Appalachian Trail
Last seen: 11 hours, 59 minutes
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: twighead]
#26974640 - 10/07/20 10:43 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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What's the issue with getting pegged by the chiefs daughters?
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Tripsurfer
Bring Back Asante!



Registered: 08/01/12
Posts: 7,129
Loc: West of Windward
Last seen: 3 months, 27 days
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: twighead]
#26974914 - 10/08/20 04:40 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Locusts and grasshoppers are ackhewally different
I did some research and apparently they are closely related but locust are the only ones with the ability to fly and the predisposition to form swarms
Creep out rate is equal for both species and directly related to size of specimen encountered
-------------------- Ach en wee ben ik de klos, met mijn boog schoot ik een albatros... A philosopher is a person who knows less and less about more and more, until he knows nothing about everything.

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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Tripsurfer]
#26974920 - 10/08/20 04:46 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Shiithead said: Asante, stop doing MXE if you're not gonna share.

These are the poll questions that I think up while sober
Quote:
Tripsurfer said:
Quote:
Locusts and grasshoppers are ackhewally different
I did some research and apparently they are closely related but locust are the only ones with the ability to fly and the predisposition to form swarms
Creep out rate is equal for both species and directly related to size of specimen encountered
Sounds like one of your ancestors offended God
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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Tripsurfer
Bring Back Asante!



Registered: 08/01/12
Posts: 7,129
Loc: West of Windward
Last seen: 3 months, 27 days
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Re: Would you make this sacrifice for your buddy? [Re: Asante]
#26975460 - 10/08/20 01:01 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Ancient atheists
-------------------- Ach en wee ben ik de klos, met mijn boog schoot ik een albatros... A philosopher is a person who knows less and less about more and more, until he knows nothing about everything.

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