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OfflineFrenchAlps
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Registered: 06/26/20
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Long time no see ! P cubensis 2g dry
    #26830575 - 07/18/20 11:01 AM (3 years, 6 months ago)

First post here but long time reader. I'm a 38yo male, french, living not far from the Alps mountains. I discovered mushrooms when partying with friends in my mid 20's. I've had funny times, a very few dark ones, and an enlightening experience (at night on sand dunes with 3 other close friends) which led me to spend hours and hours reading on the psychedelic experience, entheogens, ... this one trip brought me some well being, self confidence, that lasted about a whole year I guess.

Long story short, I kept on going with my life and changed of living place, getting close to the mountains, as I dreamt as I was a child. I've been overworked for many years, I met my wife, married, my son was born, I helped raise her own children ... we're a family nowadays, a strong one I'd say. But there have been dark times as two of our children have behavorial/psy problems (I'm the stepfather, not an easy role).

Until recently, I has almost given up on using mushrooms to reach deep within myself. I still smoke cannabis but at a very moderate level (once or twice a week, when I'm off, 2 to 3 hits on a vaporizer). I did microdose though, found some benefits, feeling more social, more creative and energized. I grow my own mushroom from growkits, for now, I will take the next step when I really have time.

The last few months, I've felt awfully exhausted, both physically and mentally and some day, the mushrooms reminded them to myself. I can't explain what happened but I got an inner feeling that I should do it again. That I should allow myself some time to go deep within myself to connect to what/who I am. I've often put my desires on the side to help with the kid's problems. It became a habbit, the one you don't even see taking place. All of a sudden, something inside me was asking to open the door and look what's inside. I quickly bought a new growkit (hadn't microdosed in almost a year) and started reading a lot : the shroomery, erowid, bought some books too.

I scheduled a day at home, my wife being away with the kids. I had first thought about finding a quiet place in the mountains but I was afraid of the cold as the weather had been so-so the days prior. I was also not sure if tripping alone would be the right thing so I decided to stay home in a controlled environment. I dig a hole in my garden (it's very big, lucky me !)to set up a campfire in front of a row a trees, put up a tent, a mat, a camping chair, headphones, sweets,water, pillow and blankets. I spent a part of the afternoon preparing all this and cutting some firewood while thinking about what would or could happen.

I made some tea with my dried shrooms, 2g dry, lit the fire first and drank the cup. I had eaten a half pizza 2h30 before driking the tea. I didn't feel nauseous, which was a very good surprise. About 20 mins later, I started to feel dizzy and relaxed as the sun was slowly setting. The trees started to breathe not long after, gently shaken by the wind. I then concentrated on the fire, bright shiny light, talking to it and to myself. I felt good, incredibly good, relaxed and at peace with myself. I must have spend about a whole hour just speaking to myself, smiling. I could see through something and had access to things I couldn't reach the rest of the time.

Then came the time for exploration. I was outside, fire still burning, added some wood to keep it alive and went on to walk and see my garden as I had not seen it yet. It was not that easy walking actually, but kinda funny to feel like I'm drunk, walking slowly. I was still drawn to trees and went to inspect many of them, touching their trunk and leaves, until I went to see a huge pine growing next to my house. It seemed to be breathing but had something a little threatening with branches heavy of needles looking very dark and "thick". It took me a few minutes to "dive" in the needles headfirst and feel them caress my face. This tree has a symbolic value for our family, it's the tallest one, it's stunningly beautiful, I could feel myself like going inside it, connecting to it ... so we had a little chat as I felt the need to express my feeling to him :wink:

I finally went back to the fire and lay on the grass, watching the sky ... and the stars ! As it had happened on the dunes, I could see some kind of electric spark rushing from one star to the other. The sky was a little bit deformed, breathing too. I spent a good amount of time just watching it, in silence this time, feeling relaxed and at peace while I was processing many things in my mind.

The fire died and it got a bit cold. I went into the tent to try and listen to some music. I was beginning to feel the weight of time though, remembering that a mushroom trip, even a mild one, lasts. By now, the trip was not as strong as it was. I had few visuals even with eyes closed. I decided to take one hit of cannabis on the vaporizer to relax and shake up the trip, I learnt it by reading it here. I listened to two Ash Ra Tempel albums and stayed in the dark, eating sweets like a starved man (it was more a pleasure of tasting than hunger). I began to think about more day to day matters but felt my mind was clearer than ever. I'm convinced I sorted some things out.

When my back made me understand I'd rather be in a bed, I went home and got into bed. I ate the second half of my pizza and went on to read on ice hockey and it's potential comeback as a pro sport. I turned the lights off when I felt I could sleep and did so. I woke up tired, but relieved.

I'm glad of the dose I chose. I was tempted to go higher but it was perfect that way. I've opened the door, peeped through it, took the occasion to work on myself and felt rejuvenated, connected to my inner self. I plan to do it again, with a larger dose, in about 2 weeks. It is now or never as next month I'm back to my full time family life.
Funny thing, I've always been curious about LSD and wanting to try it. I even bought some 1P blotters (2x100µg) as I can't find some 25 and wouldn't even know where to look. I will take them but my past trip with mushrooms has lowered my desire. I like the path of growing the key to my inner world, preparing the tea, offering some kind of prayer (I'm not religious at all but did something of the sort to focus on what I wanted to experience).

Overall, I'm extremely happy to be back in the psychedelic world. I'm much more confident my issued will be solved, I have a better mindset to deal with it. My wife came back 3 days later and found me transofrmed for the better. Thank you for reading my words, and thanks to the community for providing so many informations, it helped me a lot !


Edit : I now remember how the thought of mushrooms came back. I was having the worst day I've had for years, felt miserable ... I needed a break and some time alone so I took a really hot bath (I never do), turned up music, loud, put my head underwater to feel the sound coming to me. Manuel Göttsching's Inventions for Electric Guitar did the trick, very hypnotic, it put me "on tracks" of thoughts ... you know the rest of the story.


Edited by FrenchAlps (07/21/20 12:17 PM)


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InvisibleMindMeower
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Registered: 05/10/19
Posts: 341
Re: Long time no see ! P cubensis 2g dry [Re: FrenchAlps]
    #26830975 - 07/18/20 03:05 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

This sounds really good, I would love to sit by a fire in nature setting one day while on mushies ~


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M(e)owing minds :mushroom2:


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OfflineFrenchAlps
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Registered: 06/26/20
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Re: Long time no see ! P cubensis 2g dry [Re: MindMeower]
    #26831767 - 07/19/20 01:29 AM (3 years, 6 months ago)

It's fantastic honestly. Up until now, I had mostly been indoors with friends, listening to some music, talking to each other. I really enjoyed the feeling of nature + being alone, it was completely different and much more personal than partying.


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Invisibleredgreenvines
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Re: Long time no see ! P cubensis 2g dry [Re: FrenchAlps]
    #26832664 - 07/19/20 02:50 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

I think 1 of those 1p blotters will be at least as strong as the one you described, probably a bit more energetic or activated seeming, but you have a huge place with room for a tent, and plenty of privacy so it could work out just fine.


--------------------
:confused: _ :brainfart:🧠  _ :finger:


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OfflineFrenchAlps
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Re: Long time no see ! P cubensis 2g dry [Re: redgreenvines]
    #26833519 - 07/20/20 01:54 AM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Thanks for the tip ! I'm gathering information on it, I will use the space available and go indoors too this time to play some music. The trip should be longer and I don't want to be out of "entertainment", waiting for it to end. I'll prepare a lot of things to do even if I don't touch half of it.

To add to my report, I remember now the moment I felt I should do mushroms again. Felt really bad at that time but this thought was an aswer to the need to reach my self, which I had neglected. I will edit my post when I have time.


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OfflineSideNote
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Registered: 09/12/10
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Re: Long time no see ! P cubensis 2g dry [Re: FrenchAlps]
    #26970162 - 10/05/20 05:58 AM (3 years, 4 months ago)

So tell us about the second trip, please ? :smile:


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OfflineFrenchAlps
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Re: Long time no see ! P cubensis 2g dry [Re: SideNote]
    #26970217 - 10/05/20 07:29 AM (3 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

SideNote said:
So tell us about the second trip, please ? :smile:




The second trip with 1p-LSD was quite a mess. I took two tabs (100µg each)as I wanted to see what it would be like to have a real trip with strong visuals. I was also very confident about my setting, the exact same one, tent, campfire, trees and the house nearby.

I was not anxious at all and waited for the sun to be about to set to enjoy the last rays of red light and the nightsky.
I quickly understood it would be far more energetic than tripping on mushrooms. I felt the need to move, I've walked a lot and my legs were sore the next day.
It came up quickly, after 20 minutes, blotters still in my mouth, I could feel something was up. My body was really tense but I managed to calm down when concentrating on my breath. Once I got used to this state, I've been rewarded with what I was looking for, the visuals : purely amazing. Colors, distortions, the sky was incredible. There were no stars to look at unfortunately but clouds rushing fast with the wind. It was all colored and every time I would blink, it seemed the shapes of the clouds would reconstruct another way.I spent a good amount of time walking outside enjoying what I could see.

What was unusual, compared to shrooms, was my attention span. I couldn't concentrate on anything more than a few seconds. I got distracted by the slightest thing and couldn't focus on anything. This made the trip messy. A few hours later, I felt exhausted from walking and being on edge.

I went back into my house and looked in the mirror, saw my psychedelic shirt (my avatar picture) waving and breathing which was very fun and hypnotic. I then had a pause moment when I realised I was completely unable to make decisions and was just wandering inside the house. I decided to sit on the couch and watch a movie, smoked some weed and enjoyed the boosted visuals. I finally went into bed and tried to sleep, which was hard but still managed for a few hours.

I woke up quite disoriented, not really sure if the trip was positive or not. It took me the whole day to process that thought and realise the experience was quite good yet disturbing as it was totally new to me. The energy and lack of attention was very disturbing but I decided I would give it another shot, which I did two more times since and had much more enjoyable trips since I wasn't surprised by what would happen. My attention span problem under this product seems to be no more as I've learned how to play with it.

Overall, nice trip, but for me it is far more recreationnal than mushrooms. I can't seem to feel the sacred or magic I do with the mushrooms. I can't connect as well to nature. I didn't have the pleasure to ingest something I had grown myself.
I will keep using them both but not with the same intent : mushrooms for healing/self exploration, LSD analog to have fun.


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OfflineSideNote
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Registered: 09/12/10
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Re: Long time no see ! P cubensis 2g dry [Re: FrenchAlps]
    #26971583 - 10/06/20 05:04 AM (3 years, 4 months ago)

mushrooms for healing/self exploration, LSD analog to have fun.

Yes, something like that it feels to me too. I haven`t done proper mushroom trip myself in five years. I think it will happen this Autumn with my own picked Semilanceatas :smile:


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