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OfflineSocrateshroom
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1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. * 6
    #26969415 - 10/04/20 04:29 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Bare with me I’m still working on tethering myself to this reality, but I wanted to get my feelings down.

I am still in absolute awe. Yesterday I took 1.5g of dried APEs. I thought I had an idea before this trip that I knew, to some degree, what it meant to have a psychedelic experience. I was wrong.

The breakdown:

Dose: 1.5g Ape

Route of Ingestion: Tea with lemon but the mushrooms were not discarded, I consumed them with the tea.

Setting: Dark room, in bed, with music playing from a speaker.

Time of Onset: Approximately 15 minutes after ingestion effects began

Come up: Incredibly fast and frightening

Duration of trip: About 3 hours of unbelievably intense effects. About an hour and a half of strong but diminishing effects after. Ending with about 2 hours of minimal effects rapidly decreasing.

The trip (I’m still processing what I experienced but part of that process for me is to write it down):

I’m in awe. The come up was incredibly fast. And it hit me like a freight train.
As soon as I started feeling the effects, my entire reality was vibrating in ways I’ve never felt. It was as if my atoms were being ripped apart and rebuilt infinitely. I was scared. My ego held on hard. I kept checking on my meters. Is my heart beating? Am I breathing? What’s happening to me? I don’t know how long this ego battle lasted, because under these effects it felt like forever.

Somehow I kept myself together. Slowly my breathing and heartbeat shifted away from my attention. The feeling of atomic disintegration gave way to a feeling of being everything. The music became me and I it. And then the CEVs began, accompanied by criticisms of my inadequacies.

I was watching unbelievable psychedelic landscapes unfold in my mind, indescribable places, while the mushroom was telling me everything wrong. “You have recently become addicted to mindless Youtube videos and games just to pass the time because you’re afraid of living”. “You’ve never been comfortable in yourself and so you’ve always lived life on others terms”. “You have no idea what it means to live”.

I was traveling in and out of being as I was being decimated by these criticisms (all absolutely true). And every time I came back to “existence” I was scared out of my mind. I though I knew what a difficult trip was because I had one uncomfortable one in the past. My hubris was shoved in my face by the mushroom. But somehow I took it all in. Moments of unbelievable fear opened up to moments of unrivaled astonishment. I was and I wasn’t. And soon, the difficulty passed and I was sailing the waves of hyperspace. It’s hard to remember the visions as I felt as if I ceased to exist and all experience was perfectly in that moment, never to be taken forward in time.

I was listening to Tool as the worst part faded and as I slowly returned to some form of previous awareness, I literally felt like I was melting, becoming part of the bed. My body was disintegrating, a mix of vibration and pressure was my reality. There was no “normal” existence in this space, everything was expressed as a vibration or force of pressure.

Eventually I reached a point where I could sit up without feeling as if my world was spinning in every possible direction. I sat for a while, observing the intense feelings in my body. The pressure on my face. The scalp feeling like there is a cleansing fire renewing it.

And slowly, about 3 hours after ingestion, I returned to a space that felt increasingly familiar to the ordinary. I was still very inebriated, but my face was no longer melting.

I’m still in absolute “shock”. I never expected 1.5g of APE to be unbelievably stronger than every 3/3.5g trip I’ve taken of non-PE variety. It was the single most profound experience I’ve had to date. It was incredibly frightening at times and awe provoking at others. I got a taste of my hubris and the colossal size of my ego. And I got to experience its dissolution. Now I will work to integrate what I’ve learned. And although it was incredibly difficult at times, I’ve never been more excited to experiment with this “flesh of the gods”. I hope to return to this space soon, after I’ve wrapped my head around everything.

I love you all. During some of my difficult moments, many of you manifested to me. You’re presence as a community and as individuals helped me overcome the tremendous fear I felt at times. I hope I can one day give myself in service and love to you all.



Side note: I went to the bathroom during the beginning of the trip. It was a nightmare. Turning the light on made me “white out” and I was losing my awareness rapidly, spiraling into a feeling of non existence. I quickly got out of there and started to feel better. So if you’re tripping in the dark, try not to turn lights on :hehehe:


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InvisiblePsicomb
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom] * 2
    #26969453 - 10/04/20 04:49 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

:hamletmonkey: booyaaaah


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When we constantly pull things apart trying to see how it works, we may end up with only an understanding of how to destroy something
- nick sand


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OfflineCrashTest
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Posts: 623
Last seen: 6 months, 29 days
Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Psicomb] * 1
    #26969481 - 10/04/20 05:00 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

My favorite dosage and favorite variety. 1.5g tea, did not consume the mushrooms and I couldn’t even open my eyes ! It was amazing


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:mushroom2: this account is automated, any posts related to activities or advice thereof are strictly opinions from numerous online sites and are for informational purposes only - CrashTest2020:mushroom2:



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OfflineTankie_J
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Registered: 01/09/19
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom] * 1
    #26969484 - 10/04/20 05:03 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Damn dude! I’ve been “there” wherever that space is. I can definitely relate to this trip report. And thank you for putting it into words.


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OfflineForresterM
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Tankie_J] * 1
    #26969513 - 10/04/20 05:19 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Nice write up :smile:  Glad I read... it's been 6+ years since I've tripped but it's been calling.  Was thinking 1g of APEs might be a threshold dose.  Will have to reconsider...


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Repugnant is a creature who would squander the ability to lift an eye to heaven, conscious of his fleeting time here.
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Invisibleevlyshrooms
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Tankie_J] * 1
    #26969522 - 10/04/20 05:26 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Woww amazing trip report man. Sounds like you hit dosage right on the money. Now imagine if you were to have gone down the proverbial 5gisd route :eek: PE definitely a breed of its own


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Edited by evlyshrooms (10/04/20 05:30 PM)


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OfflineExstortion
Apprentice in Myco


Registered: 08/05/20
Posts: 727
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Forrester] * 1
    #26969544 - 10/04/20 05:34 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

🙏🏼. I know how you feel by all the content you wrote. When you have a life altering trip, your fingers just type away about the experience but still it’s not comprehended by words. Perfect geometric shapes and patterns. Entity’s. It’s real but it’s in a “altered state of consciousness.” I know I’m the least artistic person( I can hardly draw a stick figure). When you trip your 3rd eye opens up. I want to do dmt again but I’m afraid.
      I came to dmt not respecting the power of it. So I seen “mother aya” (I think Mother Earth) and she scared the fk out of me. I had my eyes open and tried to lean against a tree that wasn’t there. The thing about dmt if you see something and look away... when you look back it’s still there!
    Shrooms and dmt are not a party drug but something you go to when you want to explore spirituality. Respect their power when you come to them or you will witness hell.


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OfflinePrimalSoup
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom] * 2
    #26969761 - 10/04/20 07:59 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Sounds like a good time. :cookiemonster:


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if you stand too close to the machine it'll start to eat you
Primal's simple tested teks and projects: :awesomenod: Wheat Prep 2.0  Acidic Tea Tek  Potency Project! 


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Offlinehazyhorse
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: PrimalSoup] * 1
    #26970016 - 10/05/20 12:53 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

damn PE sounds wild. cool trip report thx for sharing


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InvisibleThe Blind Ass
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: hazyhorse] * 1
    #26970038 - 10/05/20 01:26 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Just you wait & see Mr. OP!

There’s always one more shout coming.

Huzzah!

:cheers:


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Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps


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OfflineSocrateshroom
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Registered: 09/05/18
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: The Blind Ass]
    #26970246 - 10/05/20 08:13 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Psicomvb said:
:hamletmonkey: booyaaaah




How I felt :hehehe:

:tripnoob:

Quote:

CrashTest said:
My favorite dosage and favorite variety. 1.5g tea, did not consume the mushrooms and I couldn’t even open my eyes ! It was amazing



Quote:

Tankie_J said:
Damn dude! I’ve been “there” wherever that space is. I can definitely relate to this trip report. And thank you for putting it into words.




Thank you for reading! :heart:

Quote:

Forrester said:
Nice write up :smile:  Glad I read... it's been 6+ years since I've tripped but it's been calling.  Was thinking 1g of APEs might be a threshold dose.  Will have to reconsider...




I had 1g about 2 months ago and it was a great experience but very mellow (I'd say akin to 2-2.5g of non-PE). The difference from 1g to 1.5g, however, was monumental. I would, however, suggest closer to 1.5g. 1g just didn't seem to get me there, but 1.5g literally blew me away.


Quote:

evlyshrooms said:
Woww amazing trip report man. Sounds like you hit dosage right on the money. Now imagine if you were to have gone down the proverbial 5gisd route :eek: PE definitely a breed of its own




I think so. I've been wanting a heavy trip for a while but I've been too scared to take the leap. After having a great but not too intense 1g APE trip 2 months ago, I thought 1.5g wouldn't be such a leap. And although I was proven wrong immediately, I'm glad that I had such a heavy/hard trip because I didn't have an opportunity to chicken out. I had to accept the fact that I took a dose I wasn't expecting and muster some courage to work through it.


Quote:

PrimalSoup said:
Sounds like a good time. :cookiemonster:




It sure was! Thanks for reading :heart:

:triplaunch:

Quote:

hazyhorse said:
damn PE sounds wild. cool trip report thx for sharing




Thank you for reading :heart: It was unprecedented for me. I'm glad they kicked my ass and humbled me.

Quote:

The Blind Ass said:
Just you wait & see Mr. OP!

There’s always one more shout coming.

Huzzah!

:cheers:




:loveheart:

Without a doubt I now see that the rabbit hole goes so much deeper and that I basically haven't even begun to experience the expanse of the psychedelic experience.

I have a lot to think about but I'm elated that I got destroyed and faced with my own arrogance/ego. I'm excited for my future trips and know that I can no longer "pussy foot" with small doses and act like I understand the psychedelic experience.


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OfflineExstortion
Apprentice in Myco


Registered: 08/05/20
Posts: 727
Loc: Cloud 9
Last seen: 2 years, 1 month
Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom]
    #26970499 - 10/05/20 12:02 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

I’m looking for a ape supplier since I’ve been failing trying to grow them 😩


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OfflineSocrateshroom
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Registered: 09/05/18
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Exstortion]
    #26970532 - 10/05/20 12:32 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Exstortion said:
I’m looking for a ape supplier since I’ve been failing trying to grow them 😩




I grew mine PF Tek style to bulk with coir. Obviously it's not as advanced technique as agar and grain but they seemed to work well with the PF Tek mixture. Perhaps try growing them with brf/verm?

Either way good luck getting them! They really are something special in terms of potency.


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OfflineExstortion
Apprentice in Myco


Registered: 08/05/20
Posts: 727
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Last seen: 2 years, 1 month
Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom]
    #26970546 - 10/05/20 12:43 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Socrateshroom said:
Quote:

Exstortion said:
I’m looking for a ape supplier since I’ve been failing trying to grow them 😩




I grew mine PF Tek style to bulk with coir. Obviously it's not as advanced technique as agar and grain but they seemed to work well with the PF Tek mixture. Perhaps try growing them with brf/verm?

Either way good luck getting them! They really are something special in terms of potency.




Yea I did that last time. I inculcated 6 GT and 6 apes. I did not use proper technique when it comes to being sterile. That being said.... only 3 GT jars made it and only 1 ape jar made it. After the 2nd flush of GT the ape cake was still not pinning. People told me to wait. So I did. But days later I noticed a funky smell in my sgfc. It was coming from the ape. So I buried the ape cake in my yard hoping maybe it would grow. It didn’t.

    Now I use a SAB and torch needles. Someone told me you can’t grow apes 🦧 on brf cakes. Is that true? I’ve never seen a pic of 🦧 growing on a cake. If you have please show me the pic thanks 🙏 I would appreciate it.


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OfflineSocrateshroom
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Registered: 09/05/18
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Exstortion]
    #26970586 - 10/05/20 01:08 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Exstortion said:
Quote:

Socrateshroom said:
Quote:

Exstortion said:
I’m looking for a ape supplier since I’ve been failing trying to grow them 😩




I grew mine PF Tek style to bulk with coir. Obviously it's not as advanced technique as agar and grain but they seemed to work well with the PF Tek mixture. Perhaps try growing them with brf/verm?

Either way good luck getting them! They really are something special in terms of potency.




Yea I did that last time. I inculcated 6 GT and 6 apes. I did not use proper technique when it comes to being sterile. That being said.... only 3 GT jars made it and only 1 ape jar made it. After the 2nd flush of GT the ape cake was still not pinning. People told me to wait. So I did. But days later I noticed a funky smell in my sgfc. It was coming from the ape. So I buried the ape cake in my yard hoping maybe it would grow. It didn’t.

    Now I use a SAB and torch needles. Someone told me you can’t grow apes 🦧 on brf cakes. Is that true? I’ve never seen a pic of 🦧 growing on a cake. If you have please show me the pic thanks 🙏 I would appreciate it.




I heard they are harder to grow on cakes but I don't know the truth behind that. I didn't birth them as cakes, although they were pinning in the jars so clearly, in my opinion, they can grow from the cake.

But I shredded my cakes to bulk and they grew fine. I'd recommend going cakes to bulk for APEs, seems a lot of people have success doing it that route if they're still on PF TEK


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OfflineExstortion
Apprentice in Myco


Registered: 08/05/20
Posts: 727
Loc: Cloud 9
Last seen: 2 years, 1 month
Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom]
    #26970592 - 10/05/20 01:12 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

You know what? I’m going to take your advice and try that. I have 7 Roatan Honduras about ready but I’m afraid to shred them when I know I can just put them in a sgfc and have fruits. I’m afraid of shredding them and failing.


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OfflineSocrateshroom
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Registered: 09/05/18
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Exstortion]
    #26970654 - 10/05/20 01:47 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Exstortion said:
You know what? I’m going to take your advice and try that. I have 7 Roatan Honduras about ready but I’m afraid to shred them when I know I can just put them in a sgfc and have fruits. I’m afraid of shredding them and failing.




Nothing to fear. I've had nothing but success shredding to bulk with coir. So long as you prep your coir properly, and your cakes are nice and healthy, you should be fine.

Get a shoebox, shred 3-4 cakes in it with a 1:1 ratio of prepped coir (i use a tiny bit more coir), add a small casing layer of coir if you're doing APE or PE to prevent blobbing and you're good to go.

I've had great yields per cake when doing bulk as compared to when I fruited cakes. And I haven't run into any issues except when I used less than 3 cakes in a shoebox.

It was a natural progression from me because it's good practice getting used to bulk with cakes before moving on to grains.


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OfflineExstortion
Apprentice in Myco


Registered: 08/05/20
Posts: 727
Loc: Cloud 9
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom]
    #26970765 - 10/05/20 02:55 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

I bought 20lbs of substrate from a good vendor. Can I use that instead of choir? Or is that a must? Also thanks for the info 🙏🏼


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OfflineSocrateshroom
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Registered: 09/05/18
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Exstortion]
    #26970793 - 10/05/20 03:13 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Exstortion said:
I bought 20lbs of substrate from a good vendor. Can I use that instead of choir? Or is that a must? Also thanks for the info 🙏🏼




I'm not sure but I wouldn't use anything nutritious that can harbor other growth. But check with someone more knowledgable on mycology than myself.

Coir, as far as I know, doesn't harbor any pathogens and isn't nutritious enough so it's perfect for bulk.

Your substrate may need sterilization whereas coir doesn't.

But like I said, check with more knowledgable people.


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OfflineExstortion
Apprentice in Myco


Registered: 08/05/20
Posts: 727
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom]
    #26970798 - 10/05/20 03:16 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Will do thanks. If any more experienced growers know I would love a opinion.


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OfflineDJ Ed
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom] * 1
    #26970890 - 10/05/20 04:33 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

You’re an inspiration, dear Socrateshroom

Peace and love, brother
DJ Ed


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“It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.”
Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind

“The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.”
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OfflineSocrateshroom
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: DJ Ed]
    #26971698 - 10/06/20 08:08 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

DJ Ed said:
You’re an inspiration, dear Socrateshroom

Peace and love, brother
DJ Ed





You were one of the people who, in my most frightening moments, manifested to me and brought a sense of calm to me in my turmoil.

I could see your essence clearly, as if I had known you for a thousand lifetimes. And it made me realize your importance to me, this community, and the entire fabric of reality.

Much love to you, my brother in the infinite. And thank you for your friendship, it truly is a light in the dark.

:loveheart:


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OfflineExstortion
Apprentice in Myco


Registered: 08/05/20
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom]
    #26971780 - 10/06/20 09:24 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

The
Quote:

Socrateshroom said:
Quote:

DJ Ed said:
You’re an inspiration, dear Socrateshroom

Peace and love, brother
DJ Ed





You were one of the people who, in my most frightening moments, manifested to me and brought a sense of calm to me in my turmoil.

I could see your essence clearly, as if I had known you for a thousand lifetimes. And it made me realize your importance to me, this community, and the entire fabric of reality.

Much love to you, my brother in the infinite. And thank you for your friendship, it truly is a light in the dark.

:loveheart:




Huh u know do Ed?


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OfflineSocrateshroom
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Exstortion]
    #26971852 - 10/06/20 10:20 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Not in person, but he has been a great friend and influence on me here on the shroomery (and I hope to visit him one day after the world stops burning and trying to kill everyone).


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OfflineExstortion
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom]
    #26971856 - 10/06/20 10:24 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

🙏


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InvisibleMindMeower
lawnmower for the brain
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Registered: 05/10/19
Posts: 341
Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Exstortion]
    #26973042 - 10/06/20 11:04 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

That's some trip ! I really need to get some APE spores someday too...

I'm wondering about one thing, were there any physical discomfort during the trip and how long did it last ?


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M(e)owing minds :mushroom2:


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OfflineDJ Ed
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom]
    #26973311 - 10/07/20 06:43 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

That is truly amazing, Socrateshroom.

I too sense people, or probably more accurately, I sense energies. Thee are 3 or 4 distinctly different energies that I come across regularly in3.5g plus trips. I’m also convinced I’ve sensed the same energies in people in differing places around the world; when I’m not tripping! For a while I became convinced there are only a few “real” people in the world and that everyone else is a “non-player character”!

I had everything prepared last Friday including 42g fresh Red Boys made into a tea. Opened a can of lager and chickened out again, with literally 30 minutes to go. I’m so lame this year. In my defence, had a super intense trip in Feb that was then compounded by cannabis. Tried again a couple of weeks later, avoided the cannabis, and had first proper bad trip in 30years. Since March this year has been a slog.

Depression came back in July, but I’ve worked through that; without the help of mushrooms!

Then in September my daughter got Covid and passed it on to me. I still have symptoms, though neither of us have any of the 3 Covid symptoms! Trouble sleeping, sore throat, runny nose, fatigue. Almost 4 weeks now. But the backlash we’ve had from school has convinced me that I wasn’t imagining all that negative energy from my few trips during the pandemic; the world is going mad.

Deleted my Facebook account at the weekend, and will probably never work on fast jets again: an old boss posted a meme about Trump, basically laughing that he’d caught Covid. I do not want to hear, talk to, or read crap anymore from all these left wing liberals who in my book are more fascist and right wing than the nazis ever we’re! It’s called basic humanity.

So this year has morphed into: no news, no social media, no mushrooms. Haven’t stopped growing and experimenting though: my mushroom fridge is overflowing :awesome:

Take care brother
DJ Ed


--------------------
“It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.”
Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind

“The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.”
Terence McKenna



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Offlinefootpath
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: DJ Ed] * 1
    #26975229 - 10/08/20 10:26 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Sounds like you did some serious conditioning.
Like HIIT for your psyche.
It hits you so fast and strong that reason hiccups on delirium and abruptly reconstitutes with the resumption of something near a homeostatic pulse.
What normally would pace itself is pent up and released at once, putting you in a hurried fumble to put one foot in front of the other.
Little will your preconditioned brain accept that, in this situation, it needn't worry about putting those feet in order; nor even making contact with the ground.

It's always nice to be reminded that your vitals are generally impervious to the substance.
However hard it might be to remind that pesky 'self' of that when you're disintegrating and to not give in to the hubbub going on amongst the rest of the temple.

Easy travels, friend.
Good to see you're getting better-suited - takes a bit for the leather to break in on a glove that can always fit the hand better.


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OfflineDJ Ed
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: footpath] * 1
    #26975246 - 10/08/20 10:34 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Appreciate your words, footpath, solid :thumbup:

DJ Ed


--------------------
“It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.”
Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind

“The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.”
Terence McKenna



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Offlinefootpath
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: DJ Ed]
    #26975274 - 10/08/20 10:59 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Not to confuse (nor dismiss), but I did mean it for socrates' OP... seems I'm out of the habit of directing my responses appropriately... but it is universally applicable for anyone journeying.

Often, it seems life circumstances are even more confusing and difficult to process and deal with than complete loss of identity and physical reality - especially for those of us a little off-kilter.
This, however, is one of those times for the human race. Most of us are journeying through tumult with very little provision.

Sorry to hear of your troubles, Ed, and glad to hear you've found a way to sort it out... definitely best during these turbulent times to look mostly in front of and within yourself. If an unadulterated mind is what your compulsion tells you, an unadulterated mind is how to move forward.


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OfflineSocrateshroom
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: footpath]
    #26975359 - 10/08/20 11:47 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

DJ Ed, sorry to hear about your depression but happy that you're getting through it!

I hope those COVID after effects don't bother you too long. I think seeing you in hyperspace was a sign that you're needed there :heart: Hopefully you'll return to the space soon.

Quote:

footpath said:
Sounds like you did some serious conditioning.
Like HIIT for your psyche.
It hits you so fast and strong that reason hiccups on delirium and abruptly reconstitutes with the resumption of something near a homeostatic pulse.
What normally would pace itself is pent up and released at once, putting you in a hurried fumble to put one foot in front of the other.
Little will your preconditioned brain accept that, in this situation, it needn't worry about putting those feet in order; nor even making contact with the ground.

It's always nice to be reminded that your vitals are generally impervious to the substance.
However hard it might be to remind that pesky 'self' of that when you're disintegrating and to not give in to the hubbub going on amongst the rest of the temple.

Easy travels, friend.
Good to see you're getting better-suited - takes a bit for the leather to break in on a glove that can always fit the hand better.




Incredibly put. Missed you footpath hope all is well!

But you really hit the nail on the head. 5 days later and i'm still feeling significantly different, with anxiety and the like significantly decreased.

I think the "checking on my vitals" was a last ditch effort of my ego to try and get me out of the experience. I had a really big battle with my ego during that time and that was when most of the fear manifested.

However, I kept repeating to myself, over the internal screams of my ego, something like "I can't turn back, so let go". And that eventually helped me let go and the fear subsided.

Quote:

footpath said:
Often, it seems life circumstances are even more confusing and difficult to process and deal with than complete loss of identity and physical reality - especially for those of us a little off-kilter.




Crazy how relevant this is. Although frightening, I faced my dissolution during the experience. Yet I seem to run away from normal life circumstances instead of face the fears head on. Something about that experience, even during the epitome of fear, that I felt comfortable in.


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InvisibleThe Blind Ass
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom] * 1
    #26975485 - 10/08/20 01:20 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

I believe it to be healthy for one’s sanity that they occasionally abandon their intellect to the utter ineffableness & inherently private intimacy of mystical experience.  Done well & it’s like a very good psychic stretch....or an exorcism...or a metamorphosis, etc....
Either way, Really loosens up the old gal and she tends to run much better afterwards.  :lol::crazy2:  :mushroom2:


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Offlinefootpath
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom] * 1
    #26975590 - 10/08/20 02:22 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

I've been surreally fortunate, given the times - no disruption of work; healthy family; and I was in the mortgage process just before the shutdowns began over here in the US - managed to get in two days before basically all lending stopped. Now in a neat little spot needing lots of fixing-up and a dedicated corner of the basement for my cultivation pursuits.
There are a lot of memes going around about introverts thriving in these quarantine conditions... really can't argue with that. In a normal scenario, I'm pretty neurotic about ingesting other peoples' mucosal secretions (unless I'm very connected with them), so wearing a face covering and practicing extra hygiene really played out in my obsessive-compulsive favor.

Haven't even had time to consider dosing, inclusive of µdosing - which I was fairly dependent on for a long time there... goes to show how much channeling your deliberateness into anything can really do wonders for your mental health. Although, through my years, I have noticed that I thrive in chaos, so... hmm. Something to be said there, I suppose.

However, the cold weather creeping in has slowed the home improvement (minimized the chaos...?) and brought back the mycological impulses... just put some 7-month-old spawn to coir about a week ago as my first non-house project in that time. Looking good so far.

Wanted to make sure my first stop was at TPE as I slowly go full-fledged discussion forum addict again.
Happy to see the familiar monikers still active during these trying times.

Quote:

Socrateshroom said:

However, I kept repeating to myself, over the internal screams of my ego, something like "I can't turn back, so let go". And that eventually helped me let go and the fear subsided.




This is that practice of making a mantra for yourself.
As benign as it seems, it's the only reason I'm able to continue in my psychedelic exploration.

As a young'un, I had a series of difficult trips that led me to believe that, each time, I was at death's doorstep.
I was taking them for the wrong reasons - to escape my reality.
Eventually I stopped and, further eventually, started to try to take them for the right reasons - to elaborate upon my reality.
However, those near-death-feeling physiological symptoms remained up until I told myself something really simple: "It comes with your body."
To this day, I may get overwhelmed and certain degrees of anxious with the physical manifestations to accompany, but I always come back to that very basic statement that acts as an almost-immediate sedation to those anxieties.
Breathing stabilizes as I forget about it. Body temperature regulates (to a degree {zing!}). And 'I' no longer am concerned about my 'self'.

Five simple words and my atoms go wherever they please.


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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: footpath] * 2
    #26975693 - 10/08/20 03:26 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

:goodday:


--------------------

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OfflineSocrateshroom
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: The Blind Ass]
    #26978156 - 10/10/20 08:42 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

The Blind Ass said:
I believe it to be healthy for one’s sanity that they occasionally abandon their intellect to the utter ineffableness & inherently private intimacy of mystical experience.  Done well & it’s like a very good psychic stretch....or an exorcism...or a metamorphosis, etc....
Either way, Really loosens up the old gal and she tends to run much better afterwards.  :lol::crazy2:  :mushroom2:




Absolutely. I never realized how much change comes from a large dose the following days. I guess I never dosed high enough to really feel those significant after-effects. But this entire week has been incredible. Less anxiety, more focused, and everything gleams with beauty to me.


--------------------


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OfflineForresterM
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom]
    #26979454 - 10/11/20 04:20 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Socrateshroom said:
I guess I never dosed high enough to really feel those significant after-effects. But this entire week has been incredible. Less anxiety, more focused, and everything gleams with beauty to me.




Do you see it as after-effects of the drug itself or changes it brought about in your mind and your outlook on things?

I've always thought it was more the latter.


--------------------
Repugnant is a creature who would squander the ability to lift an eye to heaven, conscious of his fleeting time here.
-------------------

Have some medicinal mushrooms and want to get the most out of them?  Try this double extraction method.


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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Forrester]
    #26980555 - 10/11/20 08:22 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

I think it's after effects of the drug.  That's why when I'm tripping a lot I tend to enjoy everything much more, I can have the afterglow pretty much nonstop when not indulging.  It wears off after a few days but how LONG it takes to wear off depends on how MUCH I did.


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OfflineNonagon Infinity
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: PrimalSoup]
    #26980827 - 10/12/20 02:23 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Great writeup. Thanks so much for sharing your experience. I will have some APEs in the relatively-near future, and I will definitely approach them with caution after reading this one. I have never had an experience stronger than 3.5 grams of amazonian cubensis, but this sounds like it was more powerful than any of my psychedelic experiences by an order of degrees. Thanks so much for sharing!


--------------------
Nonagon Infinity Opens the Door


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Offlinefootpath
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: PrimalSoup]
    #26980991 - 10/12/20 07:41 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Forrester said:
Quote:

Socrateshroom said:
I guess I never dosed high enough to really feel those significant after-effects. But this entire week has been incredible. Less anxiety, more focused, and everything gleams with beauty to me.




Do you see it as after-effects of the drug itself or changes it brought about in your mind and your outlook on things?

I've always thought it was more the latter.




I'd agree with Primal in that,
Quote:

PrimalSoup said:
I think it's after effects of the drug.  That's why when I'm tripping a lot I tend to enjoy everything much more, I can have the afterglow pretty much nonstop when not indulging.  It wears off after a few days but how LONG it takes to wear off depends on how MUCH I did.



I'm sure, like with many substances, there's a certain amount of time that it takes for your physiology (especially neurophysiology) to return somewhere close to your default parameters without said substance.

But I'd also think (and what makes psychedelics so substantial to the human experience) that there's that intangible (or maybe just hard-to-quantify) impression on your perspective and your own proprioception within it.
Being so distinctly extracted from and replaced to a certain state of coherent/normal perception gives, what I would think, a rippling effect that will, to some degree, skew the makeup of what gives us our perception. And the closer we are to that extraction/replacement event, the more we notice the changes that have taken place in our perception.
Like returning home after a vacation to find everything is a bit smaller and closer together. But the psychedelic vacation is from self and the place in physical reality it usually is.
I think, even after the body regulates from the substance, there's another sort of half-life running its course that takes a much longer time to fade - the impressions that your perception has made on your self.


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OfflineSocrateshroom
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Forrester]
    #26981064 - 10/12/20 08:32 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Forrester said:
Do you see it as after-effects of the drug itself or changes it brought about in your mind and your outlook on things?
I've always thought it was more the latter.




To address this somewhat unnecessarily, as footpath has already said it spot on:

Quote:

footpath said:
there's a certain amount of time that it takes for your physiology (especially neurophysiology) to return somewhere close to your default parameters without said substance.





I believe this to be true.

Quote:

footpath said:
But the psychedelic vacation is from self and the place in physical reality it usually is.
I think, even after the body regulates from the substance, there's another sort of half-life running its course that takes a much longer time to fade - the impressions that your perception has made on your self.




I feel that this is just as equally important as the actual substance chemically interacting with the body.

I remember coming back from a weekend silent meditation retreat at a buddhist monastery, and, as I arrived at home, I sat on my front steps for a good 20 minutes. I could hear the interplay of the world, animals, the soft touch of the wind on the nearby vegetation, in a way that I had never experienced.

That meditation retreat really changed the way of my perception, temporarily of course, due to being radically different than my normal day to day life. For a good week afterwards, I was much more aware and grounded in the moment.

I did not keep up with my meditation practices after that and soon my perception returned to much of what it was before the retreat, with the caveat that it now had an experience that did, in some small but fundamental way, reshape it forever.

So I see it as a combination of the two. The substance itself acting on our receptors and having substantial but temporary after-effects on the physiology and the significant change in perceptual interaction with the world that leaves an imprint on the psyche (most noticeably for some short time after but in some small way for a long time or even permanently).


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OfflinePrimalSoup
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom]
    #26981681 - 10/12/20 02:41 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

It's really afterglow as distinct from aftereffects.  The two are related but not the same.  :solidnod:


--------------------

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OfflineSocrateshroom
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: PrimalSoup]
    #26981697 - 10/12/20 02:50 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

So is afterglow the physical portion of the persisting effects?

And aftereffects the mental changes from such an intense experience?

Or am I mixing these up?


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OfflinePrimalSoup
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: Socrateshroom]
    #26981716 - 10/12/20 02:57 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Well that's what I would call them.  I often have no particular mental changes, so those subside early on if you're doing mushrooms regularly and often (i.e. no juice left to squeeze) but I will almost always have afterglow tapering off over several days. 

That good happy sort of feeling. :seriousthumbsup:


--------------------

if you stand too close to the machine it'll start to eat you
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OfflineExstortion
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: PrimalSoup]
    #26981734 - 10/12/20 03:05 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Wtf is Duncan Trussel when you need him??


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OfflineDJ Ed
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: PrimalSoup]
    #26982814 - 10/13/20 06:28 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Towards the back end of last year, I tripped over 3.5g every two weeks for a few months. By January I stopped dosing a while; the after glow was lasting almost the full two weeks :awesome:


--------------------
“It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.”
Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind

“The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.”
Terence McKenna



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InvisibleD3_Myc
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: DJ Ed]
    #26984878 - 10/14/20 10:53 AM (3 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

DJ Ed said:
Towards the back end of last year, I tripped over 3.5g every two weeks for a few months. By January I stopped dosing a while; the after glow was lasting almost the full two weeks :awesome:




Hey buddy, haven’t bumped into you in a bit. Sucks you’re still having troubles, My aunt just passed from covid. She had lung cancer though so just sped up the inevitable. Glad you guys are on the mend.
How’s The safe space coming along? I haven’t dosed in probably a good 2-3 months it seems like. Always some reason or excuse why not to.. mostly cause I’m fat and love food. Flavors aways trump fasting lol.

I mailed some plates to a buddy in Canada then got really paranoid when they sat at the airport more than a few days. Dumped and buried my tubs, jars and plates.. like 20 days later they started moving again and actually made it to their destination. Had to start over again.


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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: D3_Myc]
    #26985199 - 10/14/20 01:53 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

You put your real return address on those????  :rollsafe:


--------------------

if you stand too close to the machine it'll start to eat you
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OfflineDJ Ed
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: D3_Myc]
    #26985347 - 10/14/20 03:05 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

It’s a messed up year, D3monic, that’s for sure. The safe place has been painful. Think we picked the worst builders ever! Got the outside and inside done, just waiting for carpet and sofa in next couple of weeks. Going to move my speakers in, and amp :awesome:

For Christmas I’ll be getting a couple of those vertical Dolby Atmos speakers to turn my system into a 7.1.2; cannot wait.

Here’s from my first (weak) trip in 6 months. Chickened our at last minute and ended up drinking less than 3g worth of tea. But that meant I could smoke cannabis when I knew it wasn’t going to be that strong. And it turned into a mega rave because I could smoke loads of cannabis with the low mushroom dose :awesome:







--------------------
“It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.”
Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind

“The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.”
Terence McKenna



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InvisibleD3_Myc
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: PrimalSoup]
    #26985452 - 10/14/20 04:06 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

It’s come along nicely though!

Quote:

PrimalSoup said:
You put your real return address on those????  :rollsafe:




No, but you know how paranoia can be. I used cash and everything but then I’m like... “my finger prints on any that? Oh no I pulled into the parking lot. My plates are on camera..” stupid shit like that.


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OfflinePrimalSoup
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Re: 1.5g APE, I thought I knew what it meant to trip. I was wrong. [Re: D3_Myc]
    #26985625 - 10/14/20 05:23 PM (3 years, 3 months ago)

The paranoia is strong with this one. :yoda2:


--------------------

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