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CHUCK.HNTR
feral urbanite



Registered: 09/30/19
Posts: 2,255
Loc: SF, CA, USA
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Oct 1st 2020, Harvest Moon, (tripping in global chaos)10g fresh Pan.cy'
#26966467 - 10/02/20 06:29 PM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Oct 1st 2020 Harvest Moon, (tripping in global chaos) 10g fresh Panaeolus cyanescens.
For the past year I’ve had great apprehension before every trip, I can attribute this to two factors one taking larger weighed out doses rather than my casual spontaneous unmeasured doses with friends in the more distant past, and two approaching the experience with meditative intent and reverence.
Sometimes I wish I didn’t build it up so much, however as I continue to open myself up to that world the more I’ve brushed against the cosmic snares and what healers like to call ‘challenging experiences’ but in an ode to historic California counter culture I still prefer to call them ‘a bad trip man’.
But don’t get your hopes up this was the opposite of a bad trip despite the global pandemic, USA racial injustice, sociopolitical uncertainty, climate change, the thick cloud of collective anxiety and the even thicker cloud of CA wild fire smoke. We have far surpassed the promised Four Horseman of The Apocalypse, and yet there I sat on a mountain precipice on the edge of the Pacific, as if I was a carved figurehead on the bow of a ship we’ll call North America-tripping in bliss.
Talking shop: I began fasting for over 24hrs before the journey I am a very active person with a voracious appetite so this part was rough for me (lol pathetic, such a pampered soft city dweller). Usually I don’t eat for 4-8hrs before ingesting.
The morning of, I drank coffee and packed my bicycle pannier with a change of clothes, warm jacket, small woven meditation mat, bright bike lights, granola bars, chicken quesadilla, coconut water, ice water, honey and 10 fresh grams of Pan cy’s.
My plan was to ride my bike to a lookout point near the top of a local mountain north of San Francisco, specifically to a spot I’ve been scoping on rides/hikes the last few months. It's stricken with incredibly steep dry grass hills and isolated groves of Douglas fir, Madrone and Oak trees. There are many short walks to large rocks that hang 1800ft above the Pacific Ocean, striking.
At 1:15pm I brewed a cup of raw cacao drank it and hit the road spandexed up for mount destiny 22 miles away. I don’t recommend riding 22miles up a mountain with a heavy bag on an empty fuel tank. Bonking 5mins into a ride is never optimal never the less I made it and it was surreal. Many of the roads there have control gates and due to fire hazard they were closed for cars. This plus bad air quality plus being a Thursday meant that I was the only one the mountain. I set up in the secluded old growth grove changed my clothes and put my woven mat on the ground where I sat with my bare feet touching the forest floor. I drizzled honey over the small groups of thin tall mushrooms and chewed them completely masticating them in my mouth only swallowing little bits at a time and focusing on breathing. I’ll add that last time I ingested mushrooms I lemon tek’d 1 dried gram of Pan Cy’s and it was extremely intense for the first 1.5hrs.
I treated the ‘come up’ like a meditation focusing on breath trying to stay calm and centered as the mushrooms took hold. Sitting there I was expecting the heavy visuals to move in, however it didn’t seem to be happening only a few moments of vision locking where I would look through the forest into another dimension but it would leave as fast as it came on.
I felt like getting up and checking the time, and walking around. To my surprise I had been sitting for a hour and a half. As I walked around I realized I felt completely calm, incredibly peaceful and content. I visited each species of the aforementioned trees and then walked out across a meadow to sit on a rock and watch the sunset. I have seen many sunsets from this mountain never from this rock. In summers of 2002-2003’ I came up to this place a few times a week but we always went to the exact same spot out of my view but less than 1/2 a mile away. Last winter I came here it was 37 degrees but 63 in SF. Today was 78 in SF and over 100 at this spot on the mountain.
As the sun set powerful oscillating wind gusts rumbled like an approaching stampede through the trees and up the steep hills first from the north west and then clam before another assault from the east north east. Both hot and steady with varied intervals of hot blasts and then stillness Directly above my head was a small patch of blue sky the first I’ve seen for a few days since the smoke got bad.
The sun was disappearing setting into what must have been thicker smoke but near the horizon there as a clearing it was deep blood orange with a sharp tapering line in either direction, one line drawn by the horizon of the ocean the other distinct line must have been thick smoke. Extending north and south the glow tapered and faded into complete grey, like an expertly blended graphite drawing.
After the sun had disappeared for a few minutes it began to reappear as if watching a sunrise upside down it had reemerged from the grey and now blasted orange rays across the coast I could no longer look toward that spot on the horizon so I turned around and looked back across the meadow at the large pine trees emerald green needles with orange tiger stripes bouncing off parts of the branches.
When I looked west again I got to witness the second sunset of the day and not long after that it was gone with the compressed horizon band leaning towards crimson.
When I got back to my camp my shoes and socks were scattered a deer family was poking around my stuff luckily I had closed my bag with the much needed quesadilla in it. I changed my clothes ate the quesadilla packed up and descended slowly down the ‘closed’ road and watched the pumpkin glow of the orange harvest moon rising. I held off from turning on my head light until I made it back to roads with cars.
The phychic trauma associated with this pandemic has conflated reactions for the the need for control with loneliness and responded to uncertainty with confusion.
I’ve seen many relationships ruined by this recently and no one is to blame, six months of this has been painful. Part of my apprehension going into this trip was fear that at best I would have all of these world problems overwhelming me more than ordinary consciousness. Instead the mushrooms gave me bliss.
My plan is to cozy up to uncertainty, process the sadness, despair, and confusion whenever possible and savor momentary feelings of bliss like the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup harvest moon of October 2020.

-------------------- "What is the practical application of a million universes?" -Alan Watts
   
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FrenchAlps
Hockey & Krautrock



Registered: 06/26/20
Posts: 49
Last seen: 18 days, 7 hours
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Re: Oct 1st 2020, Harvest Moon, (tripping in global chaos)10g fresh Pan.cy' [Re: CHUCK.HNTR]
#26966808 - 10/03/20 12:43 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Thank you for your report ! Well written, I love how you described nature and its beauty ! Glad for you shrooms brought you bliss, seems like you needed it. I hope you can ride on that wave for a good time to go through these harsh times.
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CHUCK.HNTR
feral urbanite



Registered: 09/30/19
Posts: 2,255
Loc: SF, CA, USA
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Re: Oct 1st 2020, Harvest Moon, (tripping in global chaos)10g fresh Pan.cy' [Re: FrenchAlps]
#26967217 - 10/03/20 09:17 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Hey thanks for reading FrenchAlps and for kind response.
-------------------- "What is the practical application of a million universes?" -Alan Watts
   
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CrazyDragon
Stranger

Registered: 05/18/20
Posts: 104
Last seen: 1 year, 14 days
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Re: Oct 1st 2020, Harvest Moon, (tripping in global chaos)10g fresh Pan.cy' [Re: CHUCK.HNTR]
#26967268 - 10/03/20 09:44 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Hey Chuck, it seemed like the experience was very therapeutic!
Its amazing how shrooms will know what you need and provide it in unexpected ways, often transcendentally.
You're a very good writer and I look forward to you elaborating on future or past experiences. Would love to hear you insight on your take-a-ways when the journey takes a turn in Weirdsville!
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CHUCK.HNTR
feral urbanite



Registered: 09/30/19
Posts: 2,255
Loc: SF, CA, USA
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Re: Oct 1st 2020, Harvest Moon, (tripping in global chaos)10g fresh Pan.cy' [Re: CrazyDragon]
#26967372 - 10/03/20 10:40 AM (3 years, 3 months ago) |
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Lolz will do CrazyDragon, and thank you!
-------------------- "What is the practical application of a million universes?" -Alan Watts
   
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