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OfflineNU.2.THIS
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Registered: 08/08/20
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Help Needed, and very Appreciated
    #26869495 - 08/08/20 04:55 AM (3 years, 5 months ago)

Hello everybody, I hope you are all well today/tonight/this morning/this afternoon whichever applies to you.

Firstly,I only joined a few Mins ago, and I intend to look over the entire forum in my week off, so if this is posted in the wrong place/board/etc please accept my apologies.

so here we go, I (of late) have been leaning more and more towards My first Psychedelic experience, I have read (a fair bit but not as much as I hoped too) watched (the videos, interviews, docus) and looked through the medical stuff (a hard read in places but with cross refs to other sources and notes, It made a lot of sense once I got through the crust.

I dont want this to turn into a woe is me post but the reason I would like to take this step is that I have only in the last  decade or so (upon meeting my wife) realised that I am the way I am sometimes (moody, closed off, quick etc) is that I am carrying around quite a lot of trauma(s) from childhood.

Now I feel i should say there are people that went/go through far far more than I did as a child, some of it  so sad it makes your heart ache, mine was not as bad as a lot, but it was a lot worse than most people go through.

anyway, that was then and this is now, ...all right i think to myself, and then realise that the now is being really badly strangled by the then, its like the memories are always there,...just at the bottom of my pocket, right at the back of my mind under the old coats and rusty Bikes, just out of view behind a fence that the me i want to be just cant see over, tip-toes jussssst wont do it, so close.

its not that I have trouble remembering the  things that caused me these traumas, i can remember (the ones i do remember) them easily, its the looking into the reasons they affect me now, how they have made me the me i am, how i can look into them to work on them to heal them, ...THATS all of the stuff thats at the bottom of my pocket, under the old coats and bike, just over the fence.

I suppose I am asking you guys your opinions on

if i shd try the psychedelic approach to deal with this ?...is it ok to go into a (my first) trip taking in the darkness that the only reason you are doing it is because of trauma (hope that makes sense)


my history  smoked weed twice at age 28-29 never since, loved the high, smoking makes me yak tho.

tried first edible (home made)51 weeks ago, now a regular user of cana-edibles.

hope this has made sense, hope its ok to post.

hope you are all well.

NU-



(all spelling errors = sorry)


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InvisibleInnerEternity
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Registered: 07/12/20
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: NU.2.THIS]
    #26869528 - 08/08/20 05:54 AM (3 years, 5 months ago)

Psychedelics have their own way to show you things, and it can be extremely unpleasant if you are not ready to face them. Psychedelics and MDMA have great potential in the treatment of traumatic experiences, but they (psychedelics) can cause traumatic experiences themselves.

You have to keep in mind that the studies about psychedelics and PTSD, depression, end-of-life anxiety are conducted by professionals. And where they have been approved, they are administered by professionals at appropriate doses in appropriate settings.


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OfflineInnerWisdom
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: InnerEternity]
    #26869531 - 08/08/20 06:00 AM (3 years, 5 months ago)

I think that is an ok approach. I don't know if the darkness is necessary. Most important is for you to feel in a comfortable environment in every way before dosing. Don't take too much. Definitely not above 3g your first time, there is no rush. Be prepared to feel anxious and other negative feelings in the first 1.5 hours aka the comeup period.


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OfflineNU.2.THIS
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: InnerWisdom]
    #26869569 - 08/08/20 06:38 AM (3 years, 5 months ago)

Valid input, thankyou. (-:


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OfflineNU.2.THIS
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: InnerWisdom]
    #26869572 - 08/08/20 06:39 AM (3 years, 5 months ago)

I Apprecitae your input and response. (-:


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OfflineInnerWisdom
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: NU.2.THIS]
    #26869823 - 08/08/20 10:14 AM (3 years, 5 months ago)

You are welcome :manofapproval:


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OfflinePrimalSoup
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: NU.2.THIS] * 1
    #26870104 - 08/08/20 01:20 PM (3 years, 5 months ago)

OP, yes, psychedelics can be (and typically are) strongly autobiographical, meaning they bring up memories and with some work on your part can help you with them.  Be prepared for stuff you don't consciously remember as well.

See for example https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6137697/ :cookiemonster:


--------------------

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OfflineNorthernerM
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: PrimalSoup] * 3
    #26870374 - 08/08/20 05:21 PM (3 years, 5 months ago)

The ways these things can effect you is really up to you. In the psychedelic experience you are an island, you create your own reality to some extent.

People like to label trips in two categories, good and bad. But I think closer to the truth there are four categories. Ecstatic, pleasant, difficult and horror. 99% of the time people experience either pleasant or difficult trips. Both of these trips categories can have great value. They lend insight into ourselves as humans and as part of this multiverse. In fact difficult trips can be the most valuable because if the things brought up were that hard to face, facing them makes us stronger and more whole. As they say there's nothing to fear but fear itself. Pleasant trips are just that, these can also contain information about yourself, others and the multiverse and can be the most enlightening. These are by far the most common.

Ecstatic and horror trips on the other hand offer little of value. Basically you lose your shit, lose all grip on reality and fall into the rabbit hole. The reasons why you feel so good or feel so bad make little sense and you can't explain it coherently to anyone else, you just can't help but feel that way. Usually afterwards with either of these experiences you are left with touch of residual psychosis that takes up to a week to fade. It's rare though. I had a horror trip once 25 years ago, the odd ecstatic trip since then. Unmemorable and unimportant experiences, I wouldn't want to set myself up to do either again.

Certainly if you are carrying baggage, but not on the edge of a breakdown, psychedelics can force you to bring up and face a lot of that stuff. It probably won't be pleasant but it won't be a bad thing either. Insight and understanding from these experiences will continue for you for a week or so after the experience itself, that integration period is really where it's all at. The trip itself is just the data download, the processing of that data is where the healing and resolution comes.

If you are having frayed ends of sanity moments already you should definitely avoid psychs though. I have certainly found a lot of resolution from my very difficult childhood through psychedelics. They are like a medicine for me. They keep things real.

If I could offer any advice about them all I would say is
1. Be alone. Turn your phone off. You don't want someone else messing with you when you are so deep in yourself. Other people are the #1 cause of difficult experiences.
2. Have no expectations, just roll with realisations as they come. Go with the flow.
3. Remember that this too shall pass. Everything will pass. It's just a drug, you will come down, you are not insane. Remember in your darkest moment, this too shall pass.

If you go down this path you will find beauty and darkness like you never saw before. Some really core stuff. So don't jump in the deep end straight away, you don't really want to overwhelm yourself and cause more trauma. But once you find your sea legs it'll all make sense. It's hard to explain though, like trying to explaining a colour to a person who was born blind. Seeing is believing.

I know I didn't really tell you if it's a good idea or not OP. I don't know you so I honestly can't. Hopefully I lent a little more insight though. If you take it slowly I think the risks are minimal and the potential benefits are immeasurable.  :peace:


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The nearest we ever come to knowing truth is when we are witness to paradox.


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Invisibleredgreenvines
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: NU.2.THIS] * 1
    #26871025 - 08/09/20 06:05 AM (3 years, 5 months ago)

what northener said is succinct. sit with this.


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OfflinePrimalSoup
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: Northerner]
    #26872415 - 08/09/20 09:51 PM (3 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Northerner said:
If you go down this path you will find beauty and darkness like you never saw before. Some really core stuff. So don't jump in the deep end straight away, you don't really want to overwhelm yourself and cause more trauma. But once you find your sea legs it'll all make sense. It's hard to explain though, like trying to explaining a colour to a person who was born blind. Seeing is believing.




:snoopyes:


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if you stand too close to the machine it'll start to eat you
Primal's simple tested teks and projects: :awesomenod: Wheat Prep 2.0  Acidic Tea Tek  Potency Project! 


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OfflineSocrateshroom
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Registered: 09/05/18
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: NU.2.THIS] * 1
    #26872845 - 08/10/20 07:50 AM (3 years, 5 months ago)

1) As stated by everyone above, Northerner has absolutely hit the nail on the head. Keep his advice close to you as you consider the journey.

2) If you take a proper dose, be prepared to have your world turned upside down. I don't mean during the trip itself, Northerner covered the general content of trips very well.

I mean after the fact.

After your first solid trip, good or bad, revelations or horrors a plenty, the world will look and feel different. After my first trip, which was undoubtedly incredible and eye-opening, I have never been the same since. An unbelievable amount of good came from it, but also difficulty. Once you open up that world, you now have the responsibility of understanding. And this can be a daunting thing.

In one way, mushrooms have increased my existential dread. The entirety of experience they offer is so profound, so unlike anything else, that the normal waking world can seem dross. Furthermore, the general stigma against them, and the ever increasing erosion of free society, can be appalling after your eyes have opened.

Yet, in a more profound way, they have given me immeasurable peace. The suffering I feel is constantly put into perspective when I remember or revisit the psychedelic realms. I feel more at ease, even when faced with my most abhorrent traumas/problems. And boy does a good trip help one face those traumas. Sometimes the "benefits" aren't immediate but, years after my first trip, I am still learning from it (and many of my subsequent trips thereafter).

Quote:

NU.2.THIS said:
if i shd try the psychedelic approach to deal with this ?...is it ok to go into a (my first) trip taking in the darkness that the only reason you are doing it is because of trauma (hope that makes sense)





My first trip was to be my "last hurrah" before I took my own life. My life was such a "hell hole" of suffering (mostly self perpetuated) that I couldn't stand it anymore. So I wanted to do something big before I went out.

Well, the mushrooms were my "first hurrah" rather than my last. They gave me new life, helped me come to terms with some childhood traumas, and opened my eyes to the vast cosmos of perception.

My problems weren't "removed" but they were put into perspective. And that is all I could truly ask for. Although after my first experience, I did not trip again for years, they were always on my mind. And one day I had come to find, that I am in love with them. They called out to me. The rest is history. They have been in my life ever since and, at least in the immediate future, will continue to be with me.

So I'd say, going into the experience to heal traumas, is one of many reasons to seek them. I hope they could give you the gifts they have bestowed upon me and many others.

Good luck :cheers:


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InvisiblePastywhyteMDiscord
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: Socrateshroom]
    #26872954 - 08/10/20 09:37 AM (3 years, 5 months ago)

I personally don’t feel I have bad trips but some are more difficult. Set and setting are important as far as preparedness is concerned but so is knowing thyself as well. If you have a lot of baggage to work out a difficult lesson is a likelihood however, even difficult lessons can offer great insight if you don’t let the experience overwhelm you.

Before tripping for a first time I think it’s important to make sure that you are not hypersensitive. A week before you plan to trip I would take a microdose which should be 0.25 grams. If you trip or feel effects from a dose that small you might be very sensitive and should proceed with caution.

I personally find small doses uncomfortable but that doesn’t mean everyone is like that. It’s important to test the waters carefully at first. Given that the potency of mushrooms varies wildly depending on species, specific genetics, and storage, never assume the potency of untested fruits.


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OfflinePrimalSoup
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: Pastywhyte]
    #26874145 - 08/10/20 09:30 PM (3 years, 5 months ago)

Good advice.  :murray:


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if you stand too close to the machine it'll start to eat you
Primal's simple tested teks and projects: :awesomenod: Wheat Prep 2.0  Acidic Tea Tek  Potency Project! 


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OfflineNU.2.THIS
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: PrimalSoup]
    #26877946 - 08/13/20 06:34 AM (3 years, 5 months ago)

Hi everyone, Let me just say thankss to everyone that posted today, I would like to go through the  replies one by one but today is not a good day (kidney infection, getting better daily, just today feel....crap.

so let me first show my apprceiation to all those who have replied or even just read my post(s) and for putting it out into the universe,..very appreciated.

Im glad that my orig post made enough sense to people, but yes I would be doing this to address traumas, my problem is, with the best will in the world, my sitters will be my wife and bestest bud iv known since we were kids, I just dont  know how much I want them to know, I mean they both know the bones of the childhood traumas, but will i have any control over what i let out /talk about etc, I have never met anyone who has tripped except for pure pleasure, so their responses were all good FOR THEIR trip.

will it be internal, or will i be talking about it, or can i choose, or do i have no power over it.

these seem like piss take questions, but I am very new to this world, learnig as much as I can, this is a journey Im going to take.

thanks all,    warm shower and med time (-:

Be well all (-:


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OfflineNU.2.THIS
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: NU.2.THIS]
    #26877954 - 08/13/20 06:39 AM (3 years, 5 months ago)

also i feel like a bit of an ass talking about my "Traumas" when I read about what other ppl go through in this life, but they were traumatic to me.

its been pointed out to me before that "too each man his own limits"

, but I just dont want to come over as a wingey lil complainer, im 37 now (just) and i think 29 years of dragging this/these stone(s) asound  behind me is enough.

Thanks all

Be Well


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Invisibleredgreenvines
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: NU.2.THIS]
    #26877999 - 08/13/20 07:34 AM (3 years, 5 months ago)

not kidney stones, sheesh - that's a scream not a whinge!


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OfflineSocrateshroom
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Re: Help Needed, and very Appreciated [Re: NU.2.THIS] * 1
    #26878011 - 08/13/20 07:49 AM (3 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

NU.2.THIS said:

Im glad that my orig post made enough sense to people, but yes I would be doing this to address traumas, my problem is, with the best will in the world, my sitters will be my wife and bestest bud iv known since we were kids, I just dont  know how much I want them to know, I mean they both know the bones of the childhood traumas, but will i have any control over what i let out /talk about etc, I have never met anyone who has tripped except for pure pleasure, so their responses were all good FOR THEIR trip.

will it be internal, or will i be talking about it, or can i choose, or do i have no power over it.





So, generally speaking, you probably won't be blurting out your darkest most personal traumas, at least I've never experienced that.

What is more likely to happen is that you open up to them WILLINGLY while under the influence, because tripping can really bring you closer to other people. That might seem uncomfortable now but it will feel natural while tripping. Personally, tripping has opened me up in ways in which I shared my deepest traumas with my friends while I was sober AFTER the trip. It just made me realize that opening up to those I care about will relieve a lot of my suffering and bring us closer together. I never once felt like running around town screaming about the depths of my psyche to my neighbors.

Or you might just be working through it internally (which I did for my own traumas during my first experience).

Or you might not really dig into your traumas at all.

The psychedelic experience has a wide range of possible effects.

Quote:

NU.2.THIS said:
also i feel like a bit of an ass talking about my "Traumas" when I read about what other ppl go through in this life, but they were traumatic to me.

its been pointed out to me before that "too each man his own limits"

, but I just dont want to come over as a wingey lil complainer, im 37 now (just) and i think 29 years of dragging this/these stone(s) around  behind me is enough.

Thanks all

Be Well




Nothing in this world makes your suffering more or less valid than that of someone else. We all feel this world differently and what makes me suffer may not phase you, and vice versa.

So don't ever think that the misfortunes that befell you aren't worth opening up about. You are just as important as the rest of us, irregardless if we have bigger or smaller perceived "problems".


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