I really could never explain this trip to anyone. I can’t even explain it to myself. I will give you what I can still piece together.
Tea recipe: Add 5g chopped PE to an aeropress Boil water in electric kettle let sit until it stops boiling Add one cup of very hot water and 1-2 tablespoons of lemon to the aeropress Steep for 20 mins With no filter(only plastic mesh cap) pour the tea into a mason jar Resteep PE for 20 mins with same amount of lemon and water Pour out water and use aeropress to squeeze out every last drop of moisture Place the mason jar half full of tea in fridge to cool down.
I was pretty scared and had to slam down the tea.
An instant level one. The second I set down that mason jar I knew I was in for the trip of my life.
I proceeded to try to play chess. I gave up at about 20 mins in. The lack of short term memory made it very stressful and almost impossible to play the game. At that time I was at level 2. I was absolutely terrified at this point. Normally I start to notice effects at 20 mins but this time I’m tripping hard. Motor skills and sense of touch are going crazy here. I slammed down the chess pieces everytime. Not understanding or being able to set them down lightly.
Mushrooms tea makes me hungry and I also enjoy food while tripping. As I eat I meander into level 3. The easiest change of the night. I’m officially tripping balls. The visuals and short term memory loss were so extreme I could not remember what anything looked like in real life. The hummus I was eating was swirling, growing, shrinking and changing textures. The food was delicious. I’m very happy I ate because I was about to be incapacitated for a couple hours.
Once I was in level 3 I did my favorite thing to do while tripping. I took a shower. My shower has a leaf pattern on the walls. This pattern was now in color and covering the entire bathroom. Mentally I am lossing it. I can feel my ego slipping away from me. My senses became almost meaningless. There was so much sensory input that I could not distinguish what I was actually feeling, smelling, tasting and hearing. I was overwhelmed but I had a plan for level 4 and 5.
Once I start thinking “I took too much” I laid in my bed, put on a blindfold and some noise canceling headphones. The discomfort immediately went away but I started to trip balls.
For a short amount of time I understood that I was in that bed. But I quickly lost that comfort. I was in many places at one time. I was experiencing many things at once. The beginning of this was very stressful and full of overwhelming thought to just let go.
If I had a thought it was real. Concrete. It would actually happen to me and I could have many of these experiences at once.
The most vivid hallucination was me leaning over my bathtub dying. I was going to die there. Nobody was going to save me. So I stayed there motionless and died. I was completely free of a body at this point. I just was. I was just part of the universe.
I proceeded to be matter floating in space. I was not a person. I had no senses. No emotion. No life of any sort. I was not a living being. I just a particle in space. There was nothing. I imagine this is similar to what people experience on 5-meo. There was no time here. I remained that way for eternity. Time was absolutely meaningless. I was in that place for a very long time.
I became very uncomfortable but had no connection to my body. I did not understand that I had a body. There was discomfort though and that brought me back to reality. I remembered that I had to breathe and it felt like I hadn’t taken a breathe for over a minute. I threw the blindfold and headphones off and gasped for air. It was like I woke up from the most extreme nightmare of myself.
I panic here. I don’t understand anything I am seeing. The pitch black room is light up like it’s Christmas. I writhe in the pain that I think I am experiencing. I contract my muscles and flail my limbs erratically before I understand that I have full control of this body.
I realize finally that I am in desperate need of water. I stand up and proceed to try and put my robe on. I cannot figure out what is the top of the robe. I can’t figure out how sleeves work. I take 10 mins trying to figure out what the robe looks like when it’s inside out. Again panic sets in and I call my trip sitter to put the robe on so I can get out of that scary room.
I get out drink my water and realize how uncomfortable level 5 is when you are trying to do every day things like drink water or put on some clothes. So I muster up the courage and just go back to the bed. Put the mask and headphone back on. And dive back into my life as a dust particle. I slowly walk back into level 4 and the trip becomes pure euphoria. I feel enlightened. Like I experienced something that I NEEDED. The beautiful visuals and patterns I normally see start to appear. I feel my body and I am so happy to have it back. I take big deeeeppp breathes of air just to hear and feel it. I got my body back but I still didn’t really understand it. The senses I feel surprise me because they are mine. I caused this sensory feedback. I realize when I touch something I can feel it. So I experimented with touching things at one point. I realize I can make sound with my body so I take the headphones off and experiment. I remember I have eyes and take the blindfold off. I was being reborn.
I proceed in to the kitchen to conquer the other two senses. I try to pour some strawberry lemonade in to a glass. I pour a sip into the glass. Drink it. I can’t understand why there isn’t more. I understand that I need to pour more. I fill a giant glass to the very top. I have no idea how much liquid people ingest. I remember looking at the gallon jug thinking I could absolutely drink the entire thing. I had no idea what an acceptable amount was. That lemonade grounded me. I smelled it, I tasted it and thoroughly enjoyed it.
I did nothing but stare into space and think about what just happened to me while I ate and drank. Again having no idea how much to eat and being completely exhausted. I must have eat 3000-4000 calories. I never became full. I eventually just gave up on being satiated. I just went to bed. I sleep like a baby and didn’t remember a single dream.
This is the only time I have ever had a “hangover” from mushrooms. If it was not the weekend I would have had to call off of work. My brain was exhausted. Just fried. I recovered physically at about noon and I will never be the same mental. I’m not sure if I fully understand who I was before that trip. It was only 2 days ago but some of those hallucinations seem real and like they happened many many years ago. They feel like they have always been a part of my life. I don’t remember what life felt like before that enlightenment. This trip is going to take years to process.
|