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Rahz
Alive Again
Registered: 11/10/05
Posts: 9,300
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Sticks and stones 1
#26834894 - 07/20/20 08:06 PM (3 years, 8 months ago) |
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"Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me."
True or false?
-------------------- rahz comfort pleasure power love truth awareness peace "The object of opening the mind, as of opening the mouth, is to shut it again on something solid." - Gilbert Keith Chesterton
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,061
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Re: Sticks and stones [Re: Rahz]
#26834909 - 07/20/20 08:14 PM (3 years, 8 months ago) |
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true if you are a person and do not take yourself too seriously.
false if you are a bot, sticks and stones can't reach a bot.
-------------------- _ 🧠_
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DividedQuantum
Outer Head
Registered: 12/06/13
Posts: 9,851
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Re: Sticks and stones [Re: Rahz] 1
#26834987 - 07/20/20 08:46 PM (3 years, 8 months ago) |
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Well, it depends on what you mean by "hurt." I would venture that the majority of people tend to be very much hurt by mean or hateful language directed at them, however much they may believe this saying applies to them. So if emotional pain counts, I think the statement is a bit idealistic.
-------------------- Vi Veri Universum Vivus Vici
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CountHTML
Stranger
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Loc: Maine
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Words do hurt us insofar as we’re social primates and we intrinsically do care what other people think of us. I think hurtful language signals to us that we are of low status and this sends us into negative emotional states.
I think a strong, emotionally mature person will be more resilient around this. That said, in times of stress or low energy we become more vulnerable to what others say and maybe even react in ways we’re not proud of.
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the strander
Explorer
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Re: Sticks and stones [Re: Rahz]
#26835450 - 07/21/20 04:50 AM (3 years, 8 months ago) |
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This is a saying people recite to themselves or others to shore up their self-confidence and ward off emotional pain. The very fact that this saying exists proves it's not true.
If you are confident enough or work hard enough at it, mere words won't have a lasting effect, or maybe even ANY effect on you. But IMO most people will be at least temporarily affected by mean words about them. To allow no effect means you're probably shutting out too much.
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sudly
Quasar Praiser
Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 11,242
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Re: Sticks and stones [Re: Rahz] 1
#26835501 - 07/21/20 06:20 AM (3 years, 8 months ago) |
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Words themselves no, but how they are thrown yes.
So, sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can make me shake if you throw them loud enough, so be careful because we might tell H.R.
-------------------- I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.
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Buster_Brown
L'une
Registered: 09/17/11
Posts: 11,605
Last seen: 18 minutes, 37 seconds
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Re: Sticks and stones [Re: Rahz]
#26835503 - 07/21/20 06:26 AM (3 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
Rahz said: "Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me."
True or false?
On the flip side, being ignored "Sent to Coventry" Link or ostracism is an age-old tool for behavior modification, if we can believe the accounts of reactions to excommunication from our history books. However one may have to accede that if 'there are more things in heaven and earth then are understood by our philosophy' then excommunication, from some otherworldly means of communication, was actually as frightful a condition as it was made out to be.
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,061
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Re: Sticks and stones [Re: sudly]
#26835560 - 07/21/20 07:36 AM (3 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
sudly said: Words themselves no, but how they are thrown yes.
So, sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can make me shake if you throw them loud enough, so be careful because we might tell H.R.
this makes a lot of sense, even electrons have some mass and if thrown with adequate acceleration the impact can become devastating.
-------------------- _ 🧠_
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Forrester
aspiring sociopath
Registered: 02/05/13
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Loc: Northeast USA
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Ultimately, only your own thoughts can harm you.
You can blame someone else's words, but they are meaningless unless you choose to give them the power to affect your mental state.
-------------------- Repugnant is a creature who would squander the ability to lift an eye to heaven, conscious of his fleeting time here. ------------------- Have some medicinal mushrooms and want to get the most out of them? Try this double extraction method.
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The Blind Ass
Bodhi
Registered: 08/16/16
Posts: 27,351
Loc: The Primordial Mind
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Re: Sticks and stones [Re: Forrester]
#26836652 - 07/21/20 05:35 PM (3 years, 8 months ago) |
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No one can press my button(s) but me
-------------------- Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps
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Buster_Brown
L'une
Registered: 09/17/11
Posts: 11,605
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Breeding can make all the difference between the values of a street brawler and a pacifist, but the consequences of pain might be said to make them identical in the long run.
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laughingdog
Stranger
Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 4,829
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Re: Sticks and stones [Re: Rahz]
#26837020 - 07/21/20 08:14 PM (3 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
Rahz said: "Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me."
True or false?
. In the real world obviously totally false as every lawyer, prosecutor, & politician knows. This is why reputation matters & why we have libel laws. Many are falsely imprisoned and tortured as result of those bearing both false and mistaken witness, world wide. If it weren't a problem "do not bear false witness" wouldn't be in the bible: https://duckduckgo.com/?q=do+not+bear+false+witness&t=hk&ia=web
. Of course if you're a therapist, and the client gets mad, who cares?, they are paying you!
. In everyday life, even without anybody saying anything specifically nasty, people misunderstand each other all the time and suffer as a result.
. As kindergarten sayings go, perhaps "it takes one to know one", which is folk wisdom (that anticipated Jung's shadow by a long shot) might often be more to the point.
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Jewstress
Momma
Registered: 03/21/19
Posts: 5,765
Loc: everywhere.
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As variable as we are individuals.
My baby daddy doesn't take words to heart at all, but he also has no empathy.
Then you have me, who reads into everything at a hypersensitive level because I'm overtly overly empathetic to the point it is unhealthy, and I can easily allow words to affect me.
I think it's another sliding scale.
-------------------- 😇
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,061
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Re: Sticks and stones [Re: Jewstress]
#26840101 - 07/23/20 09:28 AM (3 years, 8 months ago) |
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sliding scales and slippery slopes are what I look forward to most.
it is what it is for a moment and then it is not
-------------------- _ 🧠_
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The Blind Ass
Bodhi
Registered: 08/16/16
Posts: 27,351
Loc: The Primordial Mind
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No bones, yet bones appear No stick , yet stick appears No stone, yet stone appears No hurt, yet hurt appears
So,
Empty bone, empty stick, empty stone, empty hurt, empty empty.
I want to make a point, but Lonchenpa/Dowman have already said it pretty well. Ahem, On cultivating patience...Or - on sticks and stones...
***
The Meditation
To become familiar with that realization, as before, in preparation, aspire to recognize echo in all things. In the main praxis take each experience as empty echo, for it contains nothing to grasp in the moment it resounds. ... Focus concentrated attention in every sensory impression. All praise and blame, words either sweet"'or bleak, are empty sound, with nothing concrete to comprehend; mind's value judgements all meaningless, we recognize all these sounds as empty echo.
An angry mind has no location nor dimension, and evident yet absent, it cannot be found; it is an empty circumstance, like an echo; even an enemy's curse, just like an echo.
Scrutinized and found absent, all is empty vibration; fully apprehended, it is as empty as the sky where neither good nor bad, benefit nor harm, can occur. Giving it no credence since in truth it is empty, we recognize all sound and vibration as enlightening echo.
Thereby, timeless samsaric loads are lifted, and the fire of anger and hatred is extinguished. Here we gain sublime patience and avoid wretched depression and in due course we approach the riches of the buddhas. At night, as before, focus on the mystical echo experience, for where sound is empty we acquire patience in life. Familiarize yourselves with the meaning of echo!
***
-------------------- Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps
Edited by The Blind Ass (07/23/20 11:10 AM)
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RJ Tubs 202
Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,123
Loc: USA
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Re: Sticks and stones [Re: Rahz] 1
#26840395 - 07/23/20 11:18 AM (3 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
Rahz said:
"Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me."
True or false?
The words that exit a person's mouth reflect their inner reality. Nothing more. If we could always know that people's words have nothing to do with US, we could avoid a lot of reactive disturbing emotions. If I call you an "idiot", that has nothing to do with you but is simply a reflection of my reality. But we tend to take words very personally. Even words that are not directed at us! HR tells me it's harassment if I overhear words that I find offensive.
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Vahn421
Awakening Moonlighter
Registered: 04/03/12
Posts: 2,162
Loc: Portland
Last seen: 3 years, 6 months
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Of course words can hurt.
But you can learn to develop an iron skin and not let them affect your inner core as you push forward.
But we shouldn't lie to ourselves when we feel the hurt. The trick is to keep moving forward and to stay true to yourself, regardless.
--------------------
Edited by Vahn421 (07/23/20 08:32 PM)
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Mguishroom
Stranger
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Re: Sticks and stones [Re: Vahn421]
#26842102 - 07/24/20 07:09 AM (3 years, 8 months ago) |
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Words don't necessarily hurt but they convey emotion which can be positive or negative. Individuals can adapt to be resilient to words and the effect they bring but it seems like everyone has a breaking point. Therefore, yes, they do hurt to the extent you allow them to, but they also seem to carry some power we can't always avoid.
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Buster_Brown
L'une
Registered: 09/17/11
Posts: 11,605
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https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.com/news/amp/world-us-canada-53521143
This issue is not about one incident. It is cultural," she told lawmakers, calling it a culture "of accepting a violence and violent language against women, an entire structure of power that supports that."
She added that she was prepared to let the incident go until Mr Yoho "made excuses" by citing his wife and daughters in a speech on Wednesday.
***********€
Notwithstanding the prevalence of the alleged 'witness' towards procuring prime-time news, we might recognize the advantage gained in an apology on the grounds of inequality.
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Buster_Brown
L'une
Registered: 09/17/11
Posts: 11,605
Last seen: 18 minutes, 37 seconds
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'Tis the season for picking 'black'berries, apparently.
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