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Invisibleninja cat 09
A paranoid android
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Registered: 10/11/09
Posts: 4,170
Loc: Mexico Flag
Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: Psyche delics]
    #26838811 - 07/22/20 05:00 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Ugh, that's terrible. I'm glad I have the freedom to tell my doc that I smoke and take kratom and mushrooms. Maybe I'm a touch too open with my doctor :lol:


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             :crazykitty:


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Invisibleblewmeanie
I'm a teapot User Gallery

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 10/01/06
Posts: 28,984
Loc: Flag
Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: Spirit-Crusher]
    #26838838 - 07/22/20 05:12 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Spirit-Crusher said:
This is all dandy for urine tests. What about those us of us who need to pass a hair test? Because not smoking weed sucks.


Shave your entire body.


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The Prophecy!

Learn To Code


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InvisibleShiithead
Your Huckleberry
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Registered: 04/05/13
Posts: 9,997
Loc: God's Flat Green Earth
Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: blewmeanie]
    #26838937 - 07/22/20 06:02 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Wax your body


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Ephesians 6:12
For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
Psalm 12:6
The words of the Lord are pure words: as silver tried in a furnace of earth, purified seven times.
Hebrews 11:3
Through faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that things which are seen were not made of things which do appear.
Revelation 3:11
Behold, I come quickly: hold that fast which thou hast, that no man take thy crown.


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InvisibleThe Blind Ass
Bodhi
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Registered: 08/16/16
Posts: 26,731
Loc: The Primordial Mind
Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: Shiithead]
    #26838941 - 07/22/20 06:04 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Conveniently acquire 3rd degree burns all over your body.

:cookiemonster:


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Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps


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OfflinePatlal
You ask too many questions
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Registered: 10/09/10
Posts: 44,805
Loc: Ottawa Flag
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Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: The Blind Ass]
    #26839038 - 07/22/20 06:49 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Nobody really needs their skin.  Just remove yours.


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InvisibleThe Blind Ass
Bodhi
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Registered: 08/16/16
Posts: 26,731
Loc: The Primordial Mind
Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: Patlal]
    #26839048 - 07/22/20 06:56 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

I donated mine to charity


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Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps


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InvisibleNiffla
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Registered: 06/09/08
Posts: 46,729
Loc: Texas
Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: The Blind Ass]
    #26840965 - 07/23/20 04:15 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Years ago I worked at a grocery store, it was one of my first jobs and I was a complete fuck up to the highest degree -- I was addicted to coke and xanax and often times I would come in high as fuck. My manager hated me (deservedly so as I look back lol) and one day I came in blitzed and she knew it. She told the store manager and they called in a drug test. It was wild, man. Like they called the shit in that day. Well I told a coworker of mine and this dude fucking ran to the bathroom and pissed in some little bottle and gave it to me. It was amazing that he did that. When I was called in for the test I just poured the bottle into the test cup while I was in the stall (with the drug test person right outside the stall mind you), and long story short I ended up passing the test :lol:

I paid the guy like $100 bucks for doing that for me after. He didn't ask for anything but I felt I owed him.

I shoulda just taken the drug test and failed it though because like a month later I was finally fired anyway :facepalm:





I also thought I was going to have to take a drug test for another job (this time just to get the job) and I bought some of the detox shit at a headshop -- I drank it in the morning and it was vile and disgusting, I almost puked and then was nauseous all day at the job interview, but in the end they never even tested me


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HAIL OUR NEW OTD KING


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OfflineCosmic Eye
The 2nd tallest
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Registered: 07/07/19
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Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: Niffla]
    #26841114 - 07/23/20 05:17 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Speaking of piss tests for jobs I just accepted a job literally 20 minutes ago after 7 years at my current one. One thing I forgot to ask, do I have to take a piss test. I piss green so obviously thats a problem.

I can pass the test I just need 30 days to study. Fingers crossed af.


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OfflineCosmic Eye
The 2nd tallest
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Registered: 07/07/19
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Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: Patlal]
    #26841129 - 07/23/20 05:26 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Patlal said:
Nobody really needs their skin.  Just remove yours.




Drop a hit or 2 of lsd and look in a mirror. Thats what I hear happens anyways..


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OfflinePsyche delics
Hypochondriac
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Registered: 09/24/15
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Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: Cosmic Eye]
    #26841461 - 07/23/20 08:11 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Cosmic Eye said:
Speaking of piss tests for jobs I just I piss green so obviously thats a problem.




Ya that's a fuxkn health problem


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InvisibleSrirachi
Mold Hand
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Registered: 10/18/05
Posts: 11,411
Loc: Fare Thee Well.
Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: Psyche delics]
    #26841483 - 07/23/20 08:21 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Karcher 50ml centrifuge tube full of clean piss. Technically most places want 60ml so be aware that you either need it entirely full, or possibly to take 2. If you buy the self-standing kind it's pretty uncomfortable but the regular kind taper to the bottom so cramming a couple up your ass isn't too bad.


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InvisibleThe Blind Ass
Bodhi
I'm a teapot User Gallery


Registered: 08/16/16
Posts: 26,731
Loc: The Primordial Mind
Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: Srirachi]
    #26841500 - 07/23/20 08:28 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Pyridium makes your urine  red/orange.  So...if you pee green already ...

Red+green= yellow.  That’s one way to get your urine to a more natural looking color...In a sort of round about way that you’ll never do :sip:


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Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps


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Offlinechutney
slappin' the whiners
Registered: 07/26/13
Posts: 402
Last seen: 1 year, 2 days
Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: The Blind Ass]
    #26841557 - 07/23/20 09:03 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Quick Fix synthetic urine


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Offlinekoods
Ribbit
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Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: Psyche delics]
    #26856610 - 08/01/20 03:38 AM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Psyche delics said:
What methods have you used to pass a drug test

I've used these successfully

1. Using someone else's urine , kept it warm with toe warmers
2. Saved up my clean pee in the fridge and used that for a drug test
3. Stole a bunch of the urine cups from their storage peed in them while I was still clean so both lines showed up on the dip sticks emptied them out and swapped out they gave me for the one that was already tested
4. Detox drinks, the cheap ones didnt work but the expensive ones did
5. Watered down my sample in the sink, I was sure this one wouldn't work but I've done it a few times and it worked Everytime so far.




What do you do for work that requires you to get tested so much?


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NotSheekle said
“if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”


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InvisibleSrirachi
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Registered: 10/18/05
Posts: 11,411
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Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: koods]
    #26856820 - 08/01/20 08:14 AM (3 years, 6 months ago)

More importantly I think is, where do you get drug tested these days and pee someplace with a sink? If an employer sends you for a drug screen, you'll probably wind up in a "dry restroom" - no sink and either a dry toilet or one that has water with heavy colorant in it so you can't use it to dilute.

That one is off the list in modern times :frown:

https://www.questdiagnostics.com/home/companies/employer/drug-screening/what-to-expect/


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OfflinePsyche delics
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Registered: 09/24/15
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Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: Srirachi]
    #26859619 - 08/02/20 07:51 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

koods said:
Quote:

Psyche delics said:
What methods have you used to pass a drug test

I've used these successfully

1. Using someone else's urine , kept it warm with toe warmers
2. Saved up my clean pee in the fridge and used that for a drug test
3. Stole a bunch of the urine cups from their storage peed in them while I was still clean so both lines showed up on the dip sticks emptied them out and swapped out they gave me for the one that was already tested
4. Detox drinks, the cheap ones didnt work but the expensive ones did
5. Watered down my sample in the sink, I was sure this one wouldn't work but I've done it a few times and it worked Everytime so far.




What do you do for work that requires you to get tested so much?



Alot of its not for work


Quote:

Srirachi said:
More importantly I think is, where do you get drug tested these days and pee someplace with a sink? If an employer sends you for a drug screen, you'll probably wind up in a "dry restroom" - no sink and either a dry toilet or one that has water with heavy colorant in it so you can't use it to dilute.

That one is off the list in modern times :frown:

https://www.questdiagnostics.com/home/companies/employer/drug-screening/what-to-expect/




Most places don't do all that especially if you're a regular they stop all that after a few times. Alot of the time they just give you a cup tell you to use the bathroom and bring it back when you're done. I've been in places that turn off the water and what not but that's usually just in the pre employment or probable cause screen.


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Offlinerocklobster
Walking my friends home...

Registered: 07/10/20
Posts: 50
Loc: Savage Reservation
Last seen: 3 months, 15 hours
Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: Psyche delics]
    #26861779 - 08/03/20 10:42 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

The synthetic stuff from the headshop. Microwaved, then ace bandaged to my leg with the handwarmer heat pack thingy. I guess it was a little too warm because when the nurse took the temp on the sample she asked if I had a fever. I said I'd been feeling pretty bad, must be.


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Offlineallseeingike
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Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: Psyche delics] * 1
    #26861780 - 08/03/20 10:45 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

copied the answer from the guy next to me


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OfflinePsyche delics
Hypochondriac
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Registered: 09/24/15
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Re: Ways you've cheated on a Drug Test? [Re: rocklobster]
    #26861878 - 08/04/20 01:07 AM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

rocklobster said:
The synthetic stuff from the headshop. Microwaved, then ace bandaged to my leg with the handwarmer heat pack thingy. I guess it was a little too warm because when the nurse took the temp on the sample she asked if I had a fever. I said I'd been feeling pretty bad, must be.



You're supposed to use toe warmers the hand warmers get to warm at least that's what I've heard I've always just used toe warmers and let it cool down a little before handing it in. When I went for a probable cause test once I had to use someone else's pee so I put it around my groin and it  was burning the fuck out of my dick, I had to just sit there and suck it up for a few minutes until I got all the paperwork done.


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