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Proton
Neutral


Registered: 06/23/18
Posts: 257
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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Introspective paranoia
#26796806 - 07/01/20 11:21 AM (3 years, 6 months ago) |
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For some reason I have recently been having difficult trips in which I have generalised paranoia and a lack of trust for anyone, including my friends, as well as a sense that everything (at least society but sometimes reality itself) is somehow fake and/or "evil"/malicious/out to get me.
This has been a recurring problem for me on mushrooms, but also since having taken mushrooms I tend to get similar intimations of the same theme on other psychedelics or even just cannabis.
I find that although I can very easily rationalise that this is probably not the actual state of things and I'm just under the effect of a drug, the feeling is impossible to ignore and without fail will drag me through that thought process for some period of time in each trip. This makes me not want to trip with other people as I worry that the paranoia will get out of hand and I'll either do something stupid out of fear, or just be incredibly uncomfortable. There never seems to be any resolution to this thought process though, so it just feels like I'm going round in circles through something unenjoyable for no beneficial reason.
Has anyone else had similar feelings and if so, were you able to find any way to reconcile or move past these?
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The Mycologist
Explorer

Registered: 05/06/16
Posts: 3,024
Last seen: 29 days, 5 hours
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Re: Introspective paranoia [Re: Proton]
#26796834 - 07/01/20 11:46 AM (3 years, 6 months ago) |
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I dont like to trip with people so there's that
-------------------- "That you are here—that life exists, and identity; That the powerful play goes on, and you will contribute a verse.” ― Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass

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evlyshrooms
willi weilii



Registered: 08/08/19
Posts: 2,272
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Re: Introspective paranoia [Re: Proton]
#26796835 - 07/01/20 11:46 AM (3 years, 6 months ago) |
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Not so much the paranoia, but I also get this strange sense of everything and everyone being a construct of my mind, especially on higher doses. Personally I've just stopped taking them for the time being. Just kinda hoping later down the line it won't be the case. Only time will tell.
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Proton
Neutral


Registered: 06/23/18
Posts: 257
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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Quote:
The Mycologist said: I dont like to trip with people so there's that
Yeah, more and more I'm leaning toward this way of doing things, but then from time to time I get these strong feelings of... idk, I guess loneliness is the closest I can come up with. Guess I just have to choose my poison :/
Quote:
evlyshrooms said: Not so much the paranoia, but I also get this strange sense of everything and everyone being a construct of my mind, especially on higher doses. Personally I've just stopped taking them for the time being. Just kinda hoping later down the line it won't be the case. Only time will tell.
Mmmm, it's been over a year since my last mushroom trip... I finally started trying to get back into things with 2cb which seems promising but it would be nice to have access to the whole spectrum of substances out there. I think you're probably right though and it will just be a case of putting it to one side for now, and trying again somewhere down the line.
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polaritymind
relaxed attention


Registered: 10/10/16
Posts: 994
Loc: Germany
Last seen: 3 months, 8 days
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Re: Introspective paranoia [Re: Proton]
#26796903 - 07/01/20 12:33 PM (3 years, 6 months ago) |
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Thats abolutely a trauma coming up. If you wanna work through it, try to recognize the projection and internalize it. Close your eyes. Ask yourself "When in the past did I have to feel like this". And then stay with the feeling. Remember, holding something down takes energy, facing it takes courage yes, but not effort, it just means to allow. This is where energy gets free.
-------------------- "to affirm life is to also affirm death" -Albert hofmann
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