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Tzooman
Intrigued



Registered: 01/20/18
Posts: 8
Loc: An Island in the Pacific
Last seen: 3 years, 26 days
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Approached by the man himself
#26752534 - 06/17/20 07:01 PM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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One of those dreams that seems more real than the others. And, one that you can remember in detail.
I am at a psychadelic conference at some hotel/resort. It's a scientific conference like one MAPS would put on. At lunch, the attendees head over to this gymnasium style room where they are serving food on long buffet tables. I am with a group people making small talk and I notice that all the food is vegetarian. I am cool with that but make a comment to someone about the lack of meat. I then notice another table running parallel. No one is at it and I saunter over. This is where the meat is! I start picking up slices of bacon and I feel somewhat guilty thinking people will judge my food choices as everyone else is at the other table. While I am sheepishly picking up my second slice or bacon, a person approaches my from behind and to my right. I look over to see who wants to talk to me. Dressed in brown pants (corduroy) and a brown sweater with horizontal coloured thin stripes is Terence McKenna. I shit you not. He doesn't introduce himself but I know who he is. His hair is shorter (bit of a buzz cut) than what I remember seeing but its definitely him. He leans in and asks me if I want to take part in eating some mushrooms with him and some others. Before he even finishes asking me, I know what he is going to say, I loudly blurt out YES! I am standing there with my food plate in one hand, bacon in the other, starring wide eyed at him and trying to curb my enthusiasm about the chance to take a trip with this dude. Terence fucking McKenna. Seriously.
We walk out of the building and are in the parking lot discussing the logistics like he has known me in the past. Like we are old friends. Crazy shit. We part our ways and I leave the dream.
Soon after I tell my girlfriend who is just waking up about the dream and how crazy it was. I am very excited about the event. Strange thing is, this is also a dream but I am in the same bed as my real self is. A dream within a dream kind of thing. Later I actually wake up and tell her the story.
In the dream I am the age I am now (51) and the timeline seems like the present. In the dream, a part of me knows that Terrence has been dead for years. But that does not seem to concern me. No one else in the room seems to notice him. He's just and attendee like everyone else.
I have had little to no experience with psychadelics. If grew some cubes with PF tek a while back with mediocre results. I did a small dose about 10 months ago (2g) and had an absolutely horrible experience. Total nausea, fear of poisoning and just plain naked fear coursing through me. Wrote a note to my kids apologizing for poisoning myself to death with bad mushroom and being irresponsible.
Currently I have been using this forum and starting from scratch. Agar from spores, strain selection, grain inoculation and bulk substrate. The monotub is about to fruit and I have six more grain jars with a vigorous strain almost ready to go to bulk. The time is growing near for another experience. Even with the very difficult experience in the past, I am going to enter the abyss/psychadelic realm again. I know I may have another bad trip. I am OK with that. I have put in the time honouring the process of growing the mushroom and I treat the entire journey with respect and reverence.
And Terence McKenna just invited me in.
PS. My second daughters name is Kenna. She is almost 20 and born well before I knew anything about this subject. Coincidence? Probably!
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Yellow Pants



Registered: 05/14/17
Posts: 1,386
Loc:
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Re: Approached by the man himself [Re: Tzooman]
#26754783 - 06/18/20 03:51 PM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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McKennas astral body lingers in the no man zone between our world and theirs. I bet you have a good trip.
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saintdextro
Entheogen psychonaut



Registered: 01/03/15
Posts: 584
Last seen: 7 months, 9 days
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Re: Approached by the man himself [Re: Yellow Pants]
#26755408 - 06/18/20 07:36 PM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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Benzos like Xanax might be helpful to cancel a bad trip, if you can find some, I know this NOT from experience.
-------------------- "He who finds peace and joy And radiance within himself That man becomes one with God And vanishes into God's bliss." -Bhagavad Gita, 5.24 One 21 - Building Better Bombs One 21 - Pacified One 21 - Two Sides Is Fine "Respectability is a cloak for the hypocrite" - Jiddu Krishnamurti
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MarkostheGnostic
Elder



Registered: 12/09/99
Posts: 14,279
Loc: South Florida
Last seen: 3 years, 2 days
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Re: Approached by the man himself [Re: Tzooman]
#26755464 - 06/18/20 07:58 PM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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Who or what are you using for guidance. Psychedelics require a guide, someone who is more experienced than you are with The Psychedelic Experience. I do not recommend solitary trips for a newbie. You stated that you are 51 years old. I am going to turn 67 next month and I took my first psychedelic in June of 1971 days after I graduated from high school. Michael Pollan was 61 when he first tripped and then in 2018 he published a best-selling book: How to Change Your Mind: What the New Science of Psychedelics Teaches Us About Consciousness, Dying, Addiction, Depression, and Transcendence. It's better late than never, although Pollan admits that he has not changed from materialist to idealist on the last page (414) of the book, but there is still a possibility for his own transcendence.
Even if you cannot find someone in your age group or younger who is more experienced, I recommend that you have a sitter for the duration - a trusted friend. The Setting is where you will embark on your entheogenic excursion but the Set refers to your mind-set. A trip is like a space launch. The beginning is particularly unnerving like the astronauts in the rocket who will soon be subjected to tremendous gravitational forces which is clearly painful and sickening as the rocket counters the gravitational pull of the Earth. The lift-off is the getting-off phase of the trip. With mushrooms, dried fruits have never made me nauseated even on a "heroic dose." Fresh fruits are always cause for queasiness. Once a rocket breaks free of gravity, the astronauts are in free-fall and they are cruising in space. The analogy will also happen to the psychonaut. The energies associated with the pull on the physical body (the anal, genital, and solar plexus earthbound regions and there energizations, which may include the need to defecate, ejaculate, or vomit) will be relieved as the energy moves up the spine to higher plexuses.
The predominance of physical sensations, pleasant and unpleasant will yield to profound psychological input. It's like the first stage of the rocket has dropped off and you're in the second stage. The apogee of the trip is the peak, and again a stage is dropped as one moves from a lot of psychodynamic baggage into a psychospiritual or a psychocosmic domain. Different authors have marked out these transitions differently. One of the first was Dr. Jean Houston and her husband. R.E.L. Masters in The Varieties of Psychedelic Experience. Stan Grof, MD, PhD is perhaps the unexcelled expert in his first book (that has been renamed) the original being Realms of the Human Unconscious: Observations from LSD Research.
However, if I might be so bold as to make a practical suggestion for before your next trip, obtain a copy of the book BE HERE NOW and read the first section prior to your trip, the core book just after the peak begins to wane, and take however much time you want with the third section of the book. I have been guiding folks since the mid 1970s and the anecdotes from author Richard Alpert AKA Ram Dass are invaluable. You can decide to discard whatever contents you choose later, but do make the core (brown or yellow pages) book a part of your next trip as your mental gyroscope with which to shape the [Mind] Set. Namaste and Happy Trails!
MtG
-------------------- γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself
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Tzooman
Intrigued



Registered: 01/20/18
Posts: 8
Loc: An Island in the Pacific
Last seen: 3 years, 26 days
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I hear you loud and clear and I appreciate the time you put into your post. Your words resonate.
I did have a 'sitter' for that first trip. Problem being, that sitter didn't sit very long. He got nervous, most likely due to my anxiety, and bolted. Not a great situation as this increased the tension in my body and dread. I don't hold animosity towards him as it was an additional layer that exposed the underlying anxiety that lays in my body. I have always known it was there and my ego used it to gain success in the world (work ethic, competition, etc). However, the anxiety does not serve me anymore and I need to face it. This is what that trip showed me. It was a valuable experience.
I have read several books on the subject but not the ones you have mentioned. Thanks for the guidance. For the next trip I still have to find a sitter. I find this a difficult task. Who can I trust to simply sit and let the experience unfold with gentle reassurances and a feeling of safety. I will have to work on this.
May hope is that you are correct with your rocket analogy. I never left the gravitational pull and it was magnified by my internal condition. The reason I posted the dream, other than its intensity, was the message that something is telling me I am ready again.
I do not take the ingestion of psychedelics lightly. I have been contemplating and researching for 5 years now. Maybe too much thought has gone into it and my ego has added battalions for defensive purposes preparing for the disassembly of its ranks. There are times when I wish I had the cavalier attitude (bravery?) that others seem to have when taking large doses of psilocybin. Some do not seem to have any fear what so ever. I find this remarkable and there is a part of me that is envious.
I have a feeling, based on the reports of others, that there is more to this reality than meets the eye. I can even now hear the collective sigh of those more experienced thinking, 'Of course there is! Duh!" The fact is, I have tried to contemplate what is outside this waking consciousness that I experience on a daily basis and I am left wanting. I may be one of those who is currently blind to the realization that there are additional 'realms' to be experienced. Even saying those words is somewhat dishonest as I am just repeating what I have read and heard.
Again, thanks for the post.
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MarkostheGnostic
Elder



Registered: 12/09/99
Posts: 14,279
Loc: South Florida
Last seen: 3 years, 2 days
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Re: Approached by the man himself [Re: Tzooman]
#26768116 - 06/21/20 08:18 PM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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You're welcome. I am a psychotherapist and clinical hypnotherapist so my predilection is to help. Besides, I had a couple supportive older more experienced friends when I was first starting out and I appreciate that almost 50 years later so I'm passing that guidance on as best I can given the non-personal media at our disposal. Everyone has some trepidation before a big dose, don't be fooled by peoples' boasts and bluster. Anyone with any real experience in this domain has had their Icarus moment[s]and have had their hubris quickly reduced to humiliation, me included! DO obtain that copy of BE HERE NOW! https://smile.amazon.com/gp/offer-listing/0517543052/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=be+here+now&qid=1592792286&sr=8-1&dchild=1
-------------------- γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself
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