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OfflineCatsLoveHouseMusic
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My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive
    #26739804 - 06/12/20 02:53 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

So I dont have anything against dreads, one of my better friends had them growing up. For reference, we are between the ages of 25-30, shes a really cute, 5’2 white girl... probably 115LB. Not saying people like this cant have them, I just thought Id add that in.

I personally like girls with straight hair, all day. I know ive seen cute girls with dreads before, but normally I dont care for them. She says shes going to show me pictures of what she wants. Shes not looking to all dreads, I saw a few pictuees of what shes aiming for, and they had some straight hair a long with dreads.

I never tell her no. Weve been together for a decade. I give her whatever, she takes my debt card and buys whatever, but I told her no immediately. I feel bad about it, and I told her we can talk about it further laterr. What do you guys have to say?


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Invisiblepsi
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: CatsLoveHouseMusic] * 2
    #26739811 - 06/12/20 02:55 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

I'd say you really can't win telling her outright not to do it. It's her hair after all.


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Invisibleremake
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: CatsLoveHouseMusic]
    #26739816 - 06/12/20 02:58 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Tell her dreadlocks are cool, you just don't want her to grow-out her armpit and leg hair and join a group of traveling new-age gypsies.


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OfflineCatsLoveHouseMusic
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: psi]
    #26739825 - 06/12/20 03:02 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Shes wanted this for awhile, which makes me feel like an ass saying no. Shes super pretty, and says that if they dont work out we will cut them out. They cost 2-300 to do as well, whoch isnt a huge deal but whatever.

I hope she gets them, and I eat my words bc they look really good.


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OfflineCatsLoveHouseMusic
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: remake]
    #26739826 - 06/12/20 03:03 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Lol... right. Shes not a hippy on the outside, only the inside so thats good.


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Invisiblepsi
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: CatsLoveHouseMusic]
    #26739835 - 06/12/20 03:10 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Oh she's also asking you to pay to have it done? Saying you don't want to pay for it is more reasonable than an "I forbid you to do it" I think.


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OfflineTripsurfer
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: CatsLoveHouseMusic]
    #26739845 - 06/12/20 03:14 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Dreads are nasty af

Also, now of all times? She wants something that is widely seen as cultural appropiation

I would advice to wait a few weeks


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Invisiblepineninja
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Tripsurfer] * 3
    #26739850 - 06/12/20 03:16 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Giving her your opinion is fine but it's her choice not yours.


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OfflinePatlal
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: pineninja] * 1
    #26739852 - 06/12/20 03:19 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Dreadlocks = Shit logs for hair.


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OfflineCjmckay
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Patlal]
    #26739873 - 06/12/20 03:27 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Show the pics you were looking at. Full dreads are ok if you're homeless, but maybe the partial thing would be cool.


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OfflineCatsLoveHouseMusic
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Cjmckay]
    #26739902 - 06/12/20 03:40 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Ya theyre partial, I forget what it looked like. Ill post the pictures she shows me later. She hasnt demanded anything ever, im the 10+ years weve been together..but this is one thing that I might not ever hear the end of, for awhile atleast. Especially when she straightens her hair, shes gorgeous and I feel like she’d be really upset if they didnt turn out nice.

I said no at first, knowing damn well I couldnt keep saying no because she doesnt insist on anything... I dont want people to think Im rude to her. I didnt mean it like that. I want to post pictures she shows me. Stay tuned.


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Offlinepslyke
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: CatsLoveHouseMusic] * 1
    #26739903 - 06/12/20 03:42 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

We should probably see a picture first to determine if they suit her.


--------------------
"What appears impenetrable to us does exist, manifesting itself in the deepest wisdom and the most radiant beauty" Einstein

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:kratom:


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Offlineqman
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: pslyke]
    #26739917 - 06/12/20 03:49 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

If you no longer find her sexually attractive because of the change, that could be problematic.


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InvisibleZombi3
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: CatsLoveHouseMusic] * 2
    #26740018 - 06/12/20 04:45 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

In the beginning it’s a lot of work. Girls can usually get through it cuz guys aren’t ones to play with their hair all day.
But at the start it requires a lot of palm rolling and knotting before they become maintenance free.

Once they’ve matured and matted, they’re sexy as hell. Super soft and they just beam with energy! Your soul shows it’s colours in your hair and dreadlocks are the ultimate expression of ones soul.

It’s a journey. It’s not just a hairstyle. Tell her that. If you’re getting dreads it should be for a reason not for fashion.

I’ve had dreadlocks since 2006. They’re a part of who I am, you get to a point where there’s no option to cut them off, you see what they can do for your soul and you feel to free to ever go back to any other hairstyle.

Though anyone with long hair knows a little bit about what I’m speaking.

Anyway, if she takes care of them she’ll be sexy with them.


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InvisibleAsante
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: CatsLoveHouseMusic]
    #26740035 - 06/12/20 04:52 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

CatsLoveHouseMusic said:
So I dont have anything against dreads, one of my better friends had them growing up. For reference, we are between the ages of 25-30, shes a really cute, 5’2 white girl... probably 115LB. Not saying people like this cant have them, I just thought Id add that in.

I personally like girls with straight hair, all day. I know ive seen cute girls with dreads before, but normally I dont care for them. She says shes going to show me pictures of what she wants. Shes not looking to all dreads, I saw a few pictuees of what shes aiming for, and they had some straight hair a long with dreads.

I never tell her no. Weve been together for a decade. I give her whatever, she takes my debt card and buys whatever, but I told her no immediately. I feel bad about it, and I told her we can talk about it further laterr. What do you guys have to say?





White people who are not Rastafarians should not go for dreadlocks.

Not just is it culturally questionable, white hair doesn't "grip" like highly curly African hair does, so it needs grease and dirt to stick together for a long time before the felting process starts.

If you're a Rastafarian, a Viking or a Dwarf, that changes things of course.



Rastafarian hair, not lazy stoners, dreads by special hair care, not neglect.


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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: CatsLoveHouseMusic]
    #26740043 - 06/12/20 04:54 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

CatsLoveHouseMusic said:
...Weve been together for a decade...




Had my hair in dreadlocks for the same duration
something to consider


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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: qman]
    #26740045 - 06/12/20 04:55 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

qman said:
If you no longer find her sexually attractive because of the change, that could be problematic.




Always make sure a long term partner is someone you feel you would still find attractive bald
cancer and chemotherapy don't discriminate, not everyone is fortunate enough to choose a hairstyle


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InvisibleAsante
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Tantrika]
    #26740052 - 06/12/20 04:57 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Tantrika said:

Always make sure a long term partner is someone you feel you would still find attractive bald





If that turns you off your "life partner" you shouldnt even be together.


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InvisibleZombi3
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Asante] * 2
    #26740053 - 06/12/20 04:57 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

That’s just inaccurate.
No matter your nationality wether it’s Caucasian or anything else, it doesn’t matter at all how straight and smooth your hair is, product is never needed to start dreadlocks.

There’s a felting technique that’s taking off (especially among women) that uses no product whatsoever.

It’s completely outdated and false information that you need to put wax or dirt or grease in your hair in order to dreadlock it and it’s a completely gross and insulting myth that you can’t wash your hair for the first month with new dreads; it’s even further more confusing and insulting to people’s intelligence that they think dreads can’t be washed at all.

How do you wash your dreads? Ugh I hate this question. Just like you wash your hair bruh.


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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Asante] * 2
    #26740061 - 06/12/20 04:59 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Asante said:
...white hair doesn't "grip" like highly curly African hair does, so it needs grease and dirt to stick together for a long time before the felting process starts.




OP, never listen to someone who tries to convince you this
white hair needs to be clean and free of products like conditioner in order to properly grip and lock up
my dreadlocks were consistently more clean than my hair has been at any other point in my life

grease and dirt obstruct the hair from tangling with itself
the real goal is to use something like a residue free baby shampoo
and ideally some salt water rub on the locks to add coarseness

generic shampoos are important to avoid
most are designed to leave a residue in your hair that adds a protective layer when being brushed straight afterwards
as dreadlocks do not get brushed, the residue simply builds up inside and rots

clean dreadlocks are happy dreadlocks


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InvisibleZombi3
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Tantrika]
    #26740068 - 06/12/20 05:00 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

My brother :raisemyglass:


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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Asante]
    #26740075 - 06/12/20 05:02 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Asante said:
Quote:

Tantrika said:

Always make sure a long term partner is someone you feel you would still find attractive bald





If that turns you off your "life partner" you shouldnt even be together.




exactly my point


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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Zombi3]
    #26740078 - 06/12/20 05:02 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

oof
*Sister
please
QQ
:heart::hug:


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Invisiblepsi
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Asante]
    #26740082 - 06/12/20 05:04 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Asante said:
Not just is it culturally questionable, white hair doesn't "grip" like highly curly African hair does, so it needs grease and dirt to stick together for a long time before the felting process starts.






Nonsense, "white hair" spans a wide range of hair textures. My hair is plenty curly and starts to lock together readily on its own if I don't brush it.


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OfflineBANANA.MAN
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: psi]
    #26740250 - 06/12/20 06:29 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

I'd just say its up to her but threaten to grow a mullet if she gets dreads.

if that doesn't scare her you can threaten to tonsure your head but you have to be willing to follow through.


Edited by BANANA.MAN (06/12/20 11:43 PM)


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InvisibleZombi3
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: BANANA.MAN]
    #26740283 - 06/12/20 06:45 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Girls with dreads are actually my weakness. I get butterflies and weak knees and tongue tied whenever I meet a cute dreadheaded girly :smile:


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OfflinePatlal
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Zombi3]
    #26740336 - 06/12/20 07:09 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Zombi3 said:
Girls with dreads are actually my weakness. I get butterflies and weak knees and tongue tied whenever I meet a cute dreadheaded girly :smile:




Your dick works in mysterious ways.


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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Zombi3]
    #26740341 - 06/12/20 07:12 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Zombi3 said:
Girls with dreads are actually my weakness. I get butterflies and weak knees and tongue tied whenever I meet a cute dreadheaded girly :smile:




Agreed
unfortunately white guys with dreadlocks look like greasy filthy clowns



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InvisiblePatrickKn
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Tantrika] * 1
    #26740361 - 06/12/20 07:18 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Ouch, I think zombie is a white guy with dreads.


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InvisibleNiffla
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: PatrickKn]
    #26740373 - 06/12/20 07:24 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

PatrickKn said:
Ouch, I think zombie is a white guy with dreads.




:ohmy:


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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Patlal]
    #26740386 - 06/12/20 07:31 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Patlal said:
Quote:

Zombi3 said:
Girls with dreads are actually my weakness. I get butterflies and weak knees and tongue tied whenever I meet a cute dreadheaded girly :smile:




Your dick works in mysterious ways.




To be fair, OP said she wants partial dreadlocks
women have increasingly been adopting hairstyles with a few dreadlocks
that still visibly adhere to regular washing routines
and many business take more seriously than someone with a full head of them

you can freely still refer to them as shit logs
but you may also increasingly encounter such people in jobs you would not expect to see dreadlocks in at all





this is why the biggest stereotype for men with dreadlocks is the ridiculous Rastafarianism and dirty hobo stuff to deal with
which does bring up "cultural appropriation"
but tends to come in to focus as a whole personality thing -- far out stoner eyes, dirty hands from gardening, business people can't take them seriously even when in a suit

but women tend to deal with just claims of cultural appropriation more
and you will see people like Kylie Jenner and fashion models be targetted with the claim
on the basis that white women are more attributed as using them as temporary hair styles
while they are one of the few options available to black women who want to have long and natural hair
and on women dreadlocks are frequently treated more as a costume that ends up getting taken off


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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: PatrickKn] * 1
    #26740388 - 06/12/20 07:32 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

PatrickKn said:
Ouch, I think zombie is a white guy with dreads.




that's okay, he can cut them off and no one will treat him like a white guy with dreads anymore


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Invisiblepsi
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Tantrika]
    #26740428 - 06/12/20 07:53 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

This took a turn. Anything to do with Zombi3 calling you brother?


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Offlinespirit_shadow
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: psi]
    #26740443 - 06/12/20 07:57 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Tell her she should keep her hair straight and YOU get dreads :awehigh:


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Invisiblepsi
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: spirit_shadow]
    #26740452 - 06/12/20 08:00 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Or a dread mullet.


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Offlinespirit_shadow
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: psi]
    #26740456 - 06/12/20 08:01 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Do you have a beard? Get the dreadvarine....its like the wolverine but with dreads....yeah I just thought it up I'm pretty high :awehigh:


--------------------
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OfflineSporeJunkie
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: spirit_shadow] * 1
    #26740460 - 06/12/20 08:02 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Let her have them man. I dated a chick with dreads and they weren’t bad at all. I really liked them too


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Invisiblepsi
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: spirit_shadow]
    #26740462 - 06/12/20 08:02 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

I am not sure how well that would work.


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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: psi]
    #26740464 - 06/12/20 08:03 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

psi said:
This took a turn. Anything to do with Zombi3 calling you brother?




Am white, and had dreadlocks for 10 years while pretending to be a man
am acutely aware of social perceptions towards such
and how easily and completely they can be alleviated


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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: psi]
    #26740470 - 06/12/20 08:05 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

psi said:
I am not sure how well that would work.




real classy like


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Offlinespirit_shadow
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Tantrika]
    #26740478 - 06/12/20 08:08 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

oh shit that's almost what I imagine a dreadvarine toblook like :chong:

.....dude has more of a Davy Jones going on.


--------------------
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Ban lotto


Edited by spirit_shadow (06/12/20 08:16 PM)


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Offlinespirit_shadow
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Tantrika] * 3
    #26740487 - 06/12/20 08:11 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Tantrika said:
Quote:

psi said:
I am not sure how well that would work.




real classy like






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InvisibleNiffla
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: spirit_shadow] * 1
    #26740491 - 06/12/20 08:13 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

spirit_shadow said:
Tell her she should keep her hair straight and YOU get dreads :awehigh:




:zomgteehee:


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OfflineCjmckay
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Tantrika]
    #26741221 - 06/13/20 07:26 AM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Tantrika said:
Quote:

Zombi3 said:
Girls with dreads are actually my weakness. I get butterflies and weak knees and tongue tied whenever I meet a cute dreadheaded girly :smile:




Agreed
unfortunately white guys with dreadlocks look like greasy filthy clowns





Thank you for that. That video is funny as hell. That should dissuade any guy from getting dreaded up.


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OfflineCatsLoveHouseMusic
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Cjmckay]
    #26742034 - 06/13/20 03:20 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

So she actually doesnt want partial dreads, but full ones. She showed me some pictures, but I wasnt convinced. I might just do it for her, shes really serious about it. I dont want it done, but she does so...  It may he good for her, so it ia what it is.

Thanks for all the suggestions/opinions/love. She showed me pictures of pretty girls with them, and I still didnt like them. I know saying that will upset some people, but Im just being homest. Its
Tough though because maby Ill like them on her. We live in an area where if you have dreads, people will automatically think youre a dirty hippy who lives in a van with a dog. It sucks. I dont believe that myself, but I must acknowledge that as well, I try to stay off the radar. Whatever. I just like straight hair, not even curly TBH. Its a big step, but I mean what am I supposed to do, literally tell her no?


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OfflineBANANA.MAN
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: CatsLoveHouseMusic]
    #26742136 - 06/13/20 04:11 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

CatsLoveHouseMusic said:
So she actually doesnt want partial dreads, but full ones. She showed me some pictures, but I wasnt convinced. I might just do it for her, shes really serious about it. I dont want it done, but she does so...  It may he good for her, so it ia what it is.

Thanks for all the suggestions/opinions/love. She showed me pictures of pretty girls with them, and I still didnt like them. I know saying that will upset some people, but Im just being homest. Its
Tough though because maby Ill like them on her. We live in an area where if you have dreads, people will automatically think youre a dirty hippy who lives in a van with a dog. It sucks. I dont believe that myself, but I must acknowledge that as well, I try to stay off the radar. Whatever. I just like straight hair, not even curly TBH. Its a big step, but I mean what am I supposed to do, literally tell her no?



I wouldnt say no but id keep a mullet for as long as she had dreads.

maybe a man bun depending on which she found more off putting.


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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: BANANA.MAN]
    #26742232 - 06/13/20 05:00 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

BANANA.MAN said:
Quote:

CatsLoveHouseMusic said:
So she actually doesnt want partial dreads, but full ones. She showed me some pictures, but I wasnt convinced. I might just do it for her, shes really serious about it. I dont want it done, but she does so...  It may he good for her, so it ia what it is.

Thanks for all the suggestions/opinions/love. She showed me pictures of pretty girls with them, and I still didnt like them. I know saying that will upset some people, but Im just being homest. Its
Tough though because maby Ill like them on her. We live in an area where if you have dreads, people will automatically think youre a dirty hippy who lives in a van with a dog. It sucks. I dont believe that myself, but I must acknowledge that as well, I try to stay off the radar. Whatever. I just like straight hair, not even curly TBH. Its a big step, but I mean what am I supposed to do, literally tell her no?



I wouldnt say no but id keep a mullet for as long as she had dreads.

maybe a man bun depending on which she found more off putting.




Honestly, with this route would be more inclined to suggest straight bald
but the area sounds like it is more likely to harass for dreadlocks than for "skin head"

but OP knows the area better, and if it is likely to get commentary for being a skin head in current political climate
then she would get to witness people targetting her partner for something he can currently just grow out and cover up but will one day not be able
then she may better comprehend why she does not mind being called a dirty hippie, but her partner feels each instance as an issue

but yeah, man bun prolly more likely to get negative social stereotypes
even if she personally finds mullets less attractive
food for thought


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InvisibleZombi3
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: Tantrika]
    #26742360 - 06/13/20 06:06 PM (3 years, 7 months ago)

I would love a girl with dreads :heart:


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Offlinepslyke
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: CatsLoveHouseMusic]
    #26816921 - 07/11/20 10:01 AM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Update? Picture of dreads?


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"What appears impenetrable to us does exist, manifesting itself in the deepest wisdom and the most radiant beauty" Einstein

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OfflineCatsLoveHouseMusic
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: pslyke]
    #26817282 - 07/11/20 12:44 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

Her appointment is next weekend. Im still on edge about it all, plus its expensive, but its whatever. If it makes her happy im for it.


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Offlinepslyke
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Registered: 06/12/10
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Re: My girlfriend wants dreadlocks, and I am apprehensive [Re: CatsLoveHouseMusic]
    #26817287 - 07/11/20 12:45 PM (3 years, 6 months ago)

:nodofunderstanding:


--------------------
"What appears impenetrable to us does exist, manifesting itself in the deepest wisdom and the most radiant beauty" Einstein

"The conservatives of 70 years ago would be outraged at what has come to pass. It embodies everything they took up arms for to defeat"Asante


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