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Forrester
aspiring sociopath


Registered: 02/05/13
Posts: 9,351
Loc: Northeast USA
Last seen: 24 days, 19 hours
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Re: Society is so weird [Re: Rahz] 1
#26721048 - 06/05/20 06:25 AM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Rahz said: when it becomes clear that one is not omnipotent one should look inward and see about fixing ones self, and not care about the world in the sense that one has tender hurtful emotions about everything
That, right there. Yep. That's it.
-------------------- Repugnant is a creature who would squander the ability to lift an eye to heaven, conscious of his fleeting time here. ------------------- Have some medicinal mushrooms and want to get the most out of them? Try this double extraction method.
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laughingdog
Stranger

Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 4,828
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Re: Society is so weird [Re: Forrester]
#26721197 - 06/05/20 07:38 AM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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I do not agree that, that settles the matter. The issue has been painted in black and white, or as having only 2 alternatives. Like this: If you can't (or don't) help it means, you don't care. and #2 therefore if you say, you care it means you are a hypocrite. So we have only 2 alternatives if we choose to view life this way: help people, or else be a hypocrite if one expresses any caring, without taking any action.
This ignores (for example) all the people who have spouses, or children, who won't listen to good advice, and do harmful and unwise 'things' to themselves, in other words they are people one loves, but can't help. These are the hundreds of shades of grey, everyday life is full of. Peoples hearts are torn apart, by these things.
I doubt any sensitive and responsible person gets through, life without encountering many such situations.
To view life as having such stark alternatives, as being either a hypocrite, or a hard nosed general (type) who speaks in terms of "collateral damage" when speaking of civilian deaths, when part of oneself knows about the "shades of grey" mentioned above, might suggest, that something else is at work in their psyche, beneath the surface. But of course I don't really know, I'm 'just another bozo at the back of the bus'.
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Rahz
Alive Again



Registered: 11/10/05
Posts: 9,230
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There was a point to my initial comments. Care has more than one connotation. To care FOR someone one must at least have a few kind words with the hope that a difference is made. Caring ABOUT someone or something generally indicates a willingness to care for in some way. I guess a person can simply spend their whole life feeling bad about everything they don't approve of, but doesn't seem the best. Could that energy not be put to better use?
In the example you gave, there is an attempt to provide care regardless of whether it is effective or not. And if a heart is being torn apart with no relief in sight, that could be a sign that one's care is not effective and that it's time to move on.
"Caring about someone else is the closest thing to being cared for."
How does it feel?
-------------------- rahz comfort pleasure power love truth awareness peace "You’re not looking close enough if you can only see yourself in people who look like you." —Ayishat Akanbi
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redgreenvines
irregular verb


Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 37,532
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Re: Society is so weird [Re: Rahz]
#26721497 - 06/05/20 10:10 AM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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there is also the teenage angst denial which becomes a true habit after a few repetitions: "I don't care!" usually followed by stomping out or slamming a door.
caring, and taking care, and 'caring for' are all aspects of awareness and compassion, and they are natural, while shutting it off is juvenile and verges on lazy.
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laughingdog
Stranger

Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 4,828
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Re: Society is so weird [Re: Rahz]
#26721657 - 06/05/20 11:13 AM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Rahz said: There was a point to my initial comments. Care has more than one connotation. To care FOR someone one must at least have a few kind words with the hope that a difference is made. Caring ABOUT someone or something generally indicates a willingness to care for in some way. I guess a person can simply spend their whole life feeling bad about everything they don't approve of, but doesn't seem the best. Could that energy not be put to better use?
In the example you gave, there is an attempt to provide care regardless of whether it is effective or not. And if a heart is being torn apart with no relief in sight, that could be a sign that one's care is not effective and that it's time to move on.
"Caring about someone else is the closest thing to being cared for."
How does it feel?
"And if a heart is being torn apart with no relief in sight, that could be a sign that one's care is not effective and that it's time to move on."
When your kid is addicted to harmful drugs (unfortunately a common situation with the current US opioid crisis), 'moving on' may not be an option.
Many thousand of folks, have spouses they love, that smoke cigarettes, and they settle, for making them smoke outside to protect the kids, but even so they know their spouses health is being harmed. But there is nothing they can do. Of course that will have an emotional effect unless one is autistic, (or perhaps the head of a tobacco company, or Donald Rumsfeld), or deeply enlightened.
There are all sorts of variations on such things in family life; it is what creates, or is the subject of many novels and films. How humans react when caught in difficult situations, or have conflicts of interest, is what creates interest, as there are often no simple answers.
Mafia, Nazi, & kidnapping movies, are some examples or types of movies, that frequently deal with the internal agony, that people go thru when caught in terrible situations, where there are no obvious answers or escape.
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Rahz
Alive Again



Registered: 11/10/05
Posts: 9,230
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Quote:
redgreenvines said: there is also the teenage angst denial which becomes a true habit after a few repetitions: "I don't care!" usually followed by stomping out or slamming a door.
caring, and taking care, and 'caring for' are all aspects of awareness and compassion, and they are natural, while shutting it off is juvenile and verges on lazy.
The teenage angst of "I don't care!" is deceptive. When said in anger it's obvious the opposite is true. "I don't want to care!" would be more honest but it would require admitting that one does care. And nowhere did I suggest shutting it off. I did actually point towards the solution but maybe you missed it.
At any rate, you and dog are both suggesting very personal situations which is not what I was addressing. In the case of dependents this is especially so. Even in the case of a spouse or close friend, if the care is "tearing one's heart apart" and there are no solutions after various attempts at resolution one can learn to be more stoic which is not the same as being lazy,"turning it off", hardening one's heart, OR, one can remove themselves from the situation which might be the best solution for everyone involved.
And it could be that some forms of "care" which linger and cause pain is due to a lack of consciousness and compassion, fear of being on one's own, fear of being a bad person through "giving up". Trapped, but perhaps not really. If one chooses to stay in a bad situation, who's fault is that? One might assume that is what they want. And so another might question how much "care" they want to invest in that situation.
I'm glad to discuss and go into tangents, but the point I've been trying to make, which some of the audience seems to understand, is that investing one's self in the ills of the world to the point one is experiencing anxiety and reducing their effectiveness is counterproductive.
-------------------- rahz comfort pleasure power love truth awareness peace "You’re not looking close enough if you can only see yourself in people who look like you." —Ayishat Akanbi
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redgreenvines
irregular verb


Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 37,532
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Re: Society is so weird [Re: Rahz]
#26721827 - 06/05/20 12:25 PM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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not just investing, but overspending, or spending beyond one's means.
it is good to knwo what you can afford - to set limits and abide within them.
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Rahz
Alive Again



Registered: 11/10/05
Posts: 9,230
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I can agree with that.
-------------------- rahz comfort pleasure power love truth awareness peace "You’re not looking close enough if you can only see yourself in people who look like you." —Ayishat Akanbi
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Buster_Brown
L'une


Registered: 09/17/11
Posts: 11,309
Last seen: 2 days, 13 hours
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Re: Society is so weird [Re: Rahz]
#26721855 - 06/05/20 12:42 PM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Rahz said: Choose your battles wisely.
While we're being helpful perhaps you can give 'A word to the wise' and explain some of the parameters one might bear in mind when choosing their battles "wisely".
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The Blind Ass
Bodhi



Registered: 08/16/16
Posts: 26,657
Loc: The Primordial Mind
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Since people can be strange/weird , it only makes sense that by extension that factor gets multiplied on the societal level. Making society not just weird - but oh so weird.
-------------------- Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps
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Rahz
Alive Again



Registered: 11/10/05
Posts: 9,230
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Quote:
Buster_Brown said:
Quote:
Rahz said: Choose your battles wisely.
While we're being helpful perhaps you can give 'A word to the wise' and explain some of the parameters one might bear in mind when choosing their battles "wisely".
I'm confused why you would ask since that is what I have been doing since the quote.
-------------------- rahz comfort pleasure power love truth awareness peace "You’re not looking close enough if you can only see yourself in people who look like you." —Ayishat Akanbi
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Buster_Brown
L'une


Registered: 09/17/11
Posts: 11,309
Last seen: 2 days, 13 hours
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Re: Society is so weird [Re: Rahz]
#26722223 - 06/05/20 03:46 PM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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Ya, well, so much can be read into "stoicism" and "responsibility", "action", "caring" and "lip service to make yourself feel good" as to make the awestruck, such as myself, believe you could actually continue revealing the mysteries that we are subject to.
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Rahz
Alive Again



Registered: 11/10/05
Posts: 9,230
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You're welcome to dispute or otherwise contradict what I have to say. Maybe I will learn something new. Maybe not. But patronizing in a debate forum isn't useful. I would rather argue with Red or laughingdog
-------------------- rahz comfort pleasure power love truth awareness peace "You’re not looking close enough if you can only see yourself in people who look like you." —Ayishat Akanbi
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Buster_Brown
L'une


Registered: 09/17/11
Posts: 11,309
Last seen: 2 days, 13 hours
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Re: Society is so weird [Re: Rahz]
#26722588 - 06/05/20 07:23 PM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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Continuing to reap wisdom from your wordplay is my only hope.
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Rahz
Alive Again



Registered: 11/10/05
Posts: 9,230
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Words often have more than one meaning and context is important. I suspect you know this as it's the basis of condescension, although it's generally a blithe attitude... careless. How's that for word play?
Do you feel I have been unkind, even after explaining my position? If so, what good does it do to attempt to return the favor by stooping to what you perceive me to be?
-------------------- rahz comfort pleasure power love truth awareness peace "You’re not looking close enough if you can only see yourself in people who look like you." —Ayishat Akanbi
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Buster_Brown
L'une


Registered: 09/17/11
Posts: 11,309
Last seen: 2 days, 13 hours
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Re: Society is so weird [Re: Rahz]
#26723286 - 06/06/20 02:27 AM (3 years, 7 months ago) |
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That's a PhD in repartee right there.
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Cujllickduo



Registered: 06/13/15
Posts: 19,552
Loc: England
Last seen: 3 years, 6 months
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Queen baptized me then stamped her print on my forehead and eating 🍄 isn't right now or then.
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The Blind Ass
Bodhi



Registered: 08/16/16
Posts: 26,657
Loc: The Primordial Mind
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You’re that one guy from the royal family that’s been kept hidden from the public all this time, aren’t you?
I knew it.
-------------------- Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps
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Cujllickduo



Registered: 06/13/15
Posts: 19,552
Loc: England
Last seen: 3 years, 6 months
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The Blind Ass
Bodhi



Registered: 08/16/16
Posts: 26,657
Loc: The Primordial Mind
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The 👑 Queen 👑 wrote to me asking for a shag, but since her inbox is full, and I cannot reply, I need you to do me a favor...seeing as how you’re part of the Royal fam and all that bullocks, please leave a note 📝 in her bed chambers saying that I’ll be sure to give her a good rogering next time I’m in town, K? Thnx!
-------------------- Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps
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