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Offlinevaananen
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Registered: 05/05/20
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Last seen: 2 months, 5 days
Anxiety/brainfog blocking hallucinations on 3.5g cubensis
    #26711380 - 06/01/20 12:13 PM (3 years, 8 months ago)

Rightye, I finally got to experience shrooms after years of hiatus. I dont know how, but suddenly they invited them selves back to my life month ago and I began planning this trip. Anyhow, I secured 5 grams of golden teachers and decided to eat an eight. It was my first time eating cubensis as they are and I need to say that this method of ingesting works wonderfully for me. No nausea, no fear, nothing like that on the come-up.

I made many error that I've now learned from. For example, doing yoga, moving around or being active other ways might have produced more pleasurable overall exprerience. Most of the time I lied on bed, trying to see into my mind - in a nutshell, I tried to do some deep work with my psyche.

I havent been relaxed since chidlhood except one occasional time on MDMA years ago. I reckon this has caused massive brain fog on me and it was visible (heh) on the trip. I could sort of see all kind of stories, images, whatnot BUT they were all behind me. And in front I can only see my dark eyelids. Have you exprienced anything like this? It was very chaotic, having a storyline going on in my head, an other one on stomach etcetera. Physical experience was very 2-dimensional. Flat.
I remember shrooms shining light and giving clearness to the mind during my previous trips.

After few hours I managed to realize that I need to stop doing something all the time. Part of me started telling me that some people actually do nothing and enjoy it. And the other part of me that trouble to grasp this. DOING NOTHING can you believe that? Unreal. And this first part, sort of like older brother, continued explaining that yes sure you can go to toilet and go on with your usual business but right now in this moment you dont need to do anything.

So, overall it was very clear headed experience. I could talk to my sitter and clock on the wall was as always. Music was great and food extraordinary. Im wondering if anxiety and inability to let go can dullen the psychedelic experience, since 3.5g is pretty much. I've had 2 and 3 grams and latter was more intense than this.


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InvisibleShr00mEater
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Registered: 10/17/18
Posts: 985
Re: Anxiety/brainfog blocking hallucinations on 3.5g cubensis [Re: vaananen]
    #26711457 - 06/01/20 12:56 PM (3 years, 8 months ago)

You are saying you want something more to do, that will avoid another boring old non-psychedelic trip in the future?

I think your trip describes a good answer for your own initial intention.


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OfflineDJ Ed
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Registered: 09/04/16
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Re: Anxiety/brainfog blocking hallucinations on 3.5g cubensis [Re: vaananen]
    #26711684 - 06/01/20 03:01 PM (3 years, 8 months ago)

A trip is universally personal to the tripper. You will have to integrate these lessons, and over time, the penny will drop,,nd it will make some kind of sense. Mushrooms do not always give the clearest of lessons!

Anxiety and inexperience can dull the experience, but this only lessens with further experience and time. Try experimenting over time with the same dose, nd you will start to find that with each successive trip, you go deeper, or you could say the mushrooms work better. It’s because you’re fighting less and letting the mushrooms work their magic. It is possible to resist a mushroom trip....up to a point. But yes, learn to let go :thumbup:

DJ Ed


--------------------
“It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.”
Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind

“The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.”
Terence McKenna



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OfflineDJ Ed
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Registered: 09/04/16
Posts: 2,326
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Re: Anxiety/brainfog blocking hallucinations on 3.5g cubensis [Re: DJ Ed]
    #26711689 - 06/01/20 03:02 PM (3 years, 8 months ago)

Addendum: when I say it’s possible to resist, what I mean is it’s possible to retain “you”, nd stay in some kind of control. Obviously you’re still tripping balls, but you don’t get to that full on psychedelic headspace.

People agree with me please.......


--------------------
“It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.”
Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind

“The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.”
Terence McKenna



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InvisibleThe Blind Ass
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Registered: 08/16/16
Posts: 26,732
Loc: The Primordial Mind
Re: Anxiety/brainfog blocking hallucinations on 3.5g cubensis [Re: DJ Ed]
    #26711893 - 06/01/20 04:53 PM (3 years, 8 months ago)

That’s more or less how it goes! 

:cookiemonster:

Like fighting sleep or hunger..  You can hold it off/resist for a limited time- but eventually you lose & it takes over.  Like trying to win a fight against a mirror image of yourself.  To surrender is to win without lifting a finger, before there can be a fight/struggle.  What is the value of doing this?  The point is illustrated by that scene from *Star Wars Return of the Jedi: when Luke is being trained by Yoda on the planet  Dagobah, fighting what appears/seems to be Darth Vader, but after the apparition of Vader takes off the infamous Mask, it is revealed it was actually Luke’s own face underneath the whole time.  Same applies to dreams & psychedelic experiences in that whatever appears in, or from them, all they are is pure mind phenomena - in essence...your own stuff, your own nature. Ie.  It’s your own face behind every hallucination.

Surrender, in this instance of the word, basically being equivalent to relaxing into the nondual primal awareness of the natural state of being - of reality just as it is.  Spontaneously accomplished via uncontrived being / non-action.  Sometimes it can feel scary to do so, others times it can feel joyous & natural - like coming home after a hard day’s work.  And Since you basically show reality the same primordial trust every time you go to sleep at night - why not do so while awake, while tripping on psychedelics?  Same thing more or less...  :oldman:



OP, Thanks for the trip report.  I’ve experienced something similar before also.  Like the hallucinations/visions were behind and-or above where my normal field-of-vision vision cuts off.

As if, if my eyes are half open & closed /ie. The total possible field of vision is divided into (upper) dark & (lower half) perception of the world - the upper dark portion is where the visions & hallucinations emerge from and take place in.  Though things can also happen in the bottom half.
That’s not how it always is when tripping, sometimes there is no distinction in where it comes from - or from seemingly everywhere OEV/CEV bleed through into each other for one big orgy of sensory playtime.  :lol:
All I am saying is - it’s also happened like you described at least on a couple of occasions. 

It doesn’t make all that much sense when spoken of because it only makes sense once experientially known in an altered state.
But yah - There ya go OP, Idk what your goals are when using psychedelics, but whatever they are I hope some higher good comes out of it.  :thumbup:


--------------------
Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps


Edited by The Blind Ass (06/01/20 05:13 PM)


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OfflineA.k.aM
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Registered: 10/27/19
Posts: 16,816
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Last seen: 2 hours, 37 minutes
Re: Anxiety/brainfog blocking hallucinations on 3.5g cubensis [Re: The Blind Ass]
    #26712714 - 06/01/20 10:36 PM (3 years, 8 months ago)

You get what you need, not always what you want.

I can totally relate to the doing nothing thing. Recently I was thinking about that myself. When I was a teenager the combination of no responsibilities and no smartphone or laptops had me doing nothing a lot of the time, and it’s sort of like a meditative state that I think kept me in a healthier overall mindset. Certainly more relaxed.

I was thinking the other day how I used to just lay in bed before sleeping, now I’m on my phone online every free minute until I pass out.


--------------------
LAGM2020


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