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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: If a man only ever has sex with little girls, do you consider him a heterosexual man? [Re: budmanman]
    #26703425 - 05/29/20 03:52 AM (3 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

budmanman said:
Quote:

Tantrika said:
creepy dude in my case was into underage anime girls and shit even in high school
creepy interests

in retrospect, it is kind of surprising it took so long for him to get nailed for something
apparently what got attention on him in the first place was he shared a bit of his child porn on facebook




people into anime girls tend to be virgins and incels.




he had multiple girlfriends who had to get abortions while we were in high school because he refused to wear a condom


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OfflineLogicaL ChaosM
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Re: If a man only ever has sex with little girls, do you consider him a heterosexual man? [Re: Tantrika]
    #26703426 - 05/29/20 03:53 AM (3 years, 8 months ago)

Theres definitely some negative/harmful/unethic kinks out there. Like kidnapping, violent "play" and of course rape. Its a creepy wold out there.....


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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: If a man only ever has sex with little girls, do you consider him a heterosexual man? [Re: LogicaL Chaos]
    #26703433 - 05/29/20 03:56 AM (3 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

LogicaL Chaos said:
Theres definitely some negative/harmful/unethic kinks out there. Like kidnapping, violent "play" and of course rape. Its a creepy wold out there.....




would not consider violent play to be unethical or harmful
you can have bloodshed take place with leather and whips
as long as all parties agree on and adhere to what the limits are


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OfflineLogicaL ChaosM
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Re: If a man only ever has sex with little girls, do you consider him a heterosexual man? [Re: Tantrika]
    #26703439 - 05/29/20 03:58 AM (3 years, 8 months ago)

I guess i meant "unsolicited" violent play (physical abuse?) where the other person was not expecting any violent play but there was anyway, if that makes sense.


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InvisibleTantrika
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Re: If a man only ever has sex with little girls, do you consider him a heterosexual man? [Re: LogicaL Chaos] * 1
    #26703441 - 05/29/20 04:01 AM (3 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

LogicaL Chaos said:
I guess i meant "unsolicited" violent play (physical abuse?) where the other person was not expecting any violent play but there was anyway, if that makes sense.




that is fair, appreciate the clarification
yeah, sadism can definitely have negative manifestations
just do not think it is inherently negative in a way that rape meets my perception as such

tho, to be fair, recall Crystal G posting about consensual rape play on at least one occasion
and while it is certainly not something for me to dabble in,
there may be some sort of outlet for healthy release or exploring difficult memories with someone trusted


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InvisibleApples in Mono
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Re: If a man only ever has sex with little girls, do you consider him a heterosexual man? [Re: Tantrika] * 2
    #26703443 - 05/29/20 04:02 AM (3 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

Tantrika said:
Quote:

The Blind Ass said:
If the pedo likes a young female.  I would think it’s safe to say they are attracted to females, and for some unknown reason, little ones.




Am hesistant to hold to this view tho
if we were in the range of pubescent young females, would be of agreement
but that would also introduce the variable of pertaining to a different (tho still socially resented) group of men

but with pre-pubescent,
it would have to be some attraction to abstract concept of womanhood or femininity
because little girls may have characteristics like growing their hair longer than little boys at their parent's decision
but, for all intents and purposes, if you shaved a bunch of them bald and put them in matching robes you would not be able to tell the girls from the boys
whereas with adults in a monastic setting -- nuns can be hot bald women :lol:




I think it's true that they could have a hard time distinguishing between a prepubescent boy & girl, under the right circumstances. But I think that would actually be true of some adults as well. But I think I get where you're coming from, because I think it's tough to pin down solid definitions for sexual preference labels in general.

I don't think it's necessarily dependent upon the genitals of those who arouse us, because, for example, a straight person could be aroused by someone who only presents as the opposite sex or who lost they're external organs in a freak accident. And internal organs are rarely even seen. One might be inclined to define it based on gender expression, but I wouldn't call a dude gay because his wife doesn't wear makeup and she dresses like I do. I think gender identity is also out, because I would still be sexually attracted to my girlfriend if she said she identifies as a man, and that wouldn't make me gay or bisexual.

So what's left? It seems to me that what's left is only our own personal perceptions of the sex of others, and doesn't necessarily have anything to with the sex or gender of others at all. A heterosexual isn't someone who is only sexually attracted to people of the opposite sex or gender. A heterosexual is someone who is only sexually attracted to people they BELIEVE to be of the opposite sex or gender. And the people they're attracted to don't even necessarily need to be real people. They can be virtual, or completely imaginary.

I do get the hesitation to wanna categorize them with traditional labels, but I don't know that I have any suggestions for more useful terms to distinguish pedophiles based on their preferences among children of different sexes or genders. What do I call a pedophile who is only aroused by prepubescent girls(or at least children he BELIEVES to be girls)?


On a bit of a side note, I think it might be worth pointing out that there are many pedophiles who never touch a child, and there are also many people who sexually abuse young children, yet aren't actually pedophiles


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InvisibleTantrika
Miss Ann Thrope
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Re: If a man only ever has sex with little girls, do you consider him a heterosexual man? [Re: Apples in Mono] * 1
    #26703459 - 05/29/20 04:21 AM (3 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

Apples in Mono said:
Quote:

Tantrika said:
Quote:

The Blind Ass said:
If the pedo likes a young female.  I would think it’s safe to say they are attracted to females, and for some unknown reason, little ones.




Am hesistant to hold to this view tho
if we were in the range of pubescent young females, would be of agreement
but that would also introduce the variable of pertaining to a different (tho still socially resented) group of men

but with pre-pubescent,
it would have to be some attraction to abstract concept of womanhood or femininity
because little girls may have characteristics like growing their hair longer than little boys at their parent's decision
but, for all intents and purposes, if you shaved a bunch of them bald and put them in matching robes you would not be able to tell the girls from the boys
whereas with adults in a monastic setting -- nuns can be hot bald women :lol:




I think it's true that they could have a hard time distinguishing between a prepubescent boy & girl, under the right circumstances. But I think that would actually be true of some adults as well. But I think I get where you're coming from, because I think it's tough to pin down solid definitions for sexual preference labels in general.




The truth in the case of adults is where a big part of this comes from for me
as pansexuality is considered to be applied to attraction to non-binary or "non-typical" gender identities

so sexual attraction to ambigious identity is not itself heterosexuality or homosexuality; and while bisexuality is typically considered to cover binary trans people, it is not the label applied here

Quote:

Apples in Mono said:
I don't think it's necessarily dependent upon the genitals of those who arouse us, because, for example, a straight person could be aroused by someone who only presents as the opposite sex or who lost they're external organs in a freak accident. And internal organs are rarely even seen. One might be inclined to define it based on gender expression, but I wouldn't call a dude gay because his wife doesn't wear makeup and she dresses like I do. I think gender identity is also out, because I would still be sexually attracted to my girlfriend if she said she identifies as a man, and that wouldn't make me gay or bisexual.




do not have anything to really add here, just want to preserve the content for posterity sake as it is worthwhile

Quote:

Apples in Mono said:
So what's left? It seems to me that what's left is only our own personal perceptions of the sex of others, and doesn't necessarily have anything to with the sex or gender of others at all. A heterosexual isn't someone who is only sexually attracted to people of the opposite sex or gender. A heterosexual is someone who is only sexually attracted to people they BELIEVE to be of the opposite sex or gender. And the people they're attracted to don't even necessarily need to be real people. They can be virtual, or completely imaginary.




While agreeing with this
the only "problem" is tracing back to what you hinted at in your first comment
there are instances of people who believe they are attracted to the opposite sex because that is what society has inundated
then they have enough sex with members of the opposite sex that they go "this isn't for me"
and they sort of briefly enter into a new sexual identity with the intention of exploring to find what they like

and do not see a pedophile who only engages with children as having an opportunity to experience that level of exploration

Quote:

Apples in Mono said:
I do get the hesitation to wanna categorize them with traditional labels, but I don't know that I have any suggestions for more useful terms to distinguish pedophiles based on their preferences among children of different sexes or genders. What do I call a pedophile who is only aroused by prepubescent girls(or at least children he BELIEVES to be girls)?




see, my only perception of such an individual is as a pedophile
and that was part of my reasoning for describing the imagined case in such a way (ie: has targetted multiple children, but has adhered to a social gender identity in selection of victims)

do not normally think of an abuser as being a particular "type" of abuser
but perhaps the scope of my classification is too broad as it stands

Quote:

Apples in Mono said:
On a bit of a side note, I think it might be worth pointing out that there are many pedophiles who never touch a child, and there are also many people who sexually abuse young children, yet aren't actually pedophiles




Yeah, this is a fair point
and perhaps it would have been better for sussing out the real issue for me if having used more accomodating language to reflect such
as established, attraction vs. action already has its own flaws


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InvisibleAsante
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Re: If a man only ever has sex with little girls, do you consider him a heterosexual man? [Re: Asante] * 2
    #26703502 - 05/29/20 05:08 AM (3 years, 8 months ago)

I'm active in a roleplaying community online that is focussed on BDSM. Like all online BDSM communities, we are plagued by the fact that there are 10x more subs than Dom/mes.

BDSM has 3 inclinations:

DOMINANT (just be the Master/Mistress)
SUBMISSIVE (just be the slave)
SWITCH (people who can be either, mood permitting)

Because "everybody" is a sub, all lids and no jars, little un/screwing action happens. :naughty:

What I have managed to do on several occasions is to help people, who were hardcore subs "who could NEVER enjoy the Dom role" learn to discover the Switch in them, to acquire the kink of serving the other by catering to their needs to be dommed. They now can enjoy Domming others on occasion, and this makes them a lot more popular with Doms too, to Dom someone who sometimes Doms, themselves. So they ironically get Dommed more too!

How the FUCK is this possible?

Your sexual orientation are default settings, or extremely ingrained programming, thats up to you, but Dom or sub inclination are kinks, they are more superficially coded in the brain. That code is subject to deliberate reprogramming if you have the person's full cooperation. If Allan Carr can talk you out of smoking (hitler was very good at that too, no lie!), you can reprogram your kink, or do so with the help of a friend.

The hardest thing about it is the deeply ingrained notion that "I am sub, I cannot change". once you break that up, its fairly easy.

Take heterosexuality. a straight guy whos watched enough porn might develop the thought "wow, if I were a girl I'd suck his dick so hard the mattress crept up his ass! That is one fine dick!" :rotfl:

For cis-heteros though, genders are non-interchangable roles.

In BDSM, anyone can be Dom and anyone can be sub. They ARE interchangable roles because its a kink. Everyone who is BDSM inclined has appreciation for both sides of the dynamic. They love the sub being Yin and the Dom/me being YANG. They can imagine to flip the script, and they can succeed in enjoying flipping the script.

Its kink, you can program that at will. You can  train yourself to get a boner in response to how Goofy talks. It would get you in trouble at Disney world but, see what I'm saying?

EVERYTHING can be made into a kink, ESPECIALLY the opposite side of the dynamic you love so much.

If the appreciation of a dynamic is in you, both sides of the duality are in you, and you can always develop a completely unrelated kink that becomes as fulfilling as the one you seek to shift the attention away from that could get you or others in trouble, like dogshit eating, exposing yourself in public, rape inclinations and pedophilia.




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