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InvisibleGrateful Dead
A Growing Ambivalence
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Registered: 11/19/12
Posts: 2,468
Loc: Parked Car, Playing NPR
Gas Station CBD
    #26655026 - 05/07/20 12:13 PM (3 years, 9 months ago)

I'm recovering after having a mind-bending trip induced from eating CBD gummies that my brother and I brought at a gas station. I know how absurd and hard to believe that sounds, however it happened. They were clearly full of THC as both my brother and I went into full panic mode and both had intense panic and an intense head-trip that lasted close to 6 hours.

I know it was a cannabis/cannabinoid because I've had multiple panic attack/THC psychosis episodes. The worst part about this episode is that it felt exactly the same as the others. I felt reality begin to slip away as I hyperfocused on each moment and how it's already happened. At the onset, I was just forced to accept that I was somehow intensely high but looked to my brother, who at first insisted that he felt sober, which both comforted and worried me. Because I've been under a lot of stress lately and thought that perhaps I was just going crazy, that I'd pushed myself to the breaking point and was going to pay the ultimate price. I asked my brother to call my girlfriend and tell her that I was having a panic attack and I told my brother to not call an ambulance, take me to the ER or let me call the police/EMS.

However, my brother said that he could not call my girlfriend and that the police were already on there way. (turns out he was just as high as I was and was also having a full blown panic attack) Right after he said that, I must have peaked because I just dissolved into myself. I was forced to accepted that the worst possible outcome was now my reality and there is no escape. However, somehow my brother and I moved into the bedroom and covered up with blankets and realized it had only been 15 mins since we were downstairs.

Sitting in the bedroom I felt comfort that my brother and I were in this horrible experience together. We are twins and had not seen eye to eye for years when we were younger and only in the past 3 years have our relationship really improved. We are both in the middle of advancing our careers and live a active life. In the past, we both lived a wild lifestyle that we sometimes struggle to leave behind. Also, a difficult childhood to boot. All of this saturated the room and influenced every agonizing moment. My bother would speak to me and seem totally self-assured, calm, clairvoyant with words that ring true and lifted me from the terror. I in turn did my best for him when he was struggling. In the bedroom, I had the obligatory epiphany about the meaning of life that in the moment helped me transcend my crushing fear of death.

For me that was, empathy. 

To accumulate empathy for others from experiences so that you can help them.

After an hour in the bedroom, my girlfriend got off work and came at picked me up. At this point I was still very scared. However, my girlfriend knows I've done psychedelics many times, smoked many times etc etc etc. She didn't think I was serious when I tried to explain to her what was happening. I told her I was scared of hurting her. She laughably replied that she can defend herself (she is a black belt) and I told her that's why I love her. It was all pure love, healing, wonderful. I set up my brother in bed and left with my girlfriend. By the time we got back to her apartment, I started to feel better. My girlfriend and I ate a jelly doughnut that was likely the best I ever had and then went to sleep.

This morning I woke up still feeling the twinges of unreality and terror from the night before. I called and checked on my brother and decided to go and check on him. Going back to the house, I actually worried I was going to have another episode. Compounding this fear was that I HAD to take a final exam before 5pm that I was worried about and had an affective evaluation with my program directors. Seeing my brother was awkward at first, because the experience we shared was so intimate and we are both reserved, independent people. However, we took a walk in the wonderful 60 degree summer air and talked about the experience we shared, accepted it and decided together to move forward.

I just finished my exam and affective evaluation. I did great on both, with my program directors telling me that I'm intelligent, driven, a role-model to my peers and exactly where I need to be.

It's a blessing and a cure to feel everything so deeply. I'm typing this up for myself and maybe anyone else who wants a laugh. I'm feeling good, listening to Eddie Vedder and drinking RedBull. Life is good but I'm never going to eat gas station CBD ever again...


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Life begins on the other side of despair...


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Offline2Ape2
Master of Learning from Error


Registered: 04/07/20
Posts: 101
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Re: Gas Station CBD [Re: Grateful Dead]
    #26662027 - 05/10/20 10:04 AM (3 years, 9 months ago)

That would be an unreal experience.  There are always lessons to be learned and glad it worked out in the end.


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If the misery of the poor be caused not by the laws of nature, but by our institutions, great is our sin.
Sir Charles Darwin


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InvisibleGrateful Dead
A Growing Ambivalence
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Registered: 11/19/12
Posts: 2,468
Loc: Parked Car, Playing NPR
Re: Gas Station CBD [Re: 2Ape2]
    #26664525 - 05/11/20 01:24 PM (3 years, 9 months ago)

Thank you, I'm also feeling grateful.

I've done a little research and the brand I ate is well know to have synthetic cannabis in its CBD products. Which is unfortunate, because I've had the worst drug experiences of my life on spice and never wanted to go though such mental trauma again.

However, this time it seemed much milder on my psyche and I'm currently seeing the whole experience as almost positive.


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Life begins on the other side of despair...


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OfflineLion
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Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 8,775
Last seen: 1 day, 19 hours
Re: Gas Station CBD [Re: Grateful Dead]
    #26665250 - 05/11/20 07:32 PM (3 years, 9 months ago)

I can totally believe the experience you describe, especially after reading that you found it has synthetic cannabis. That sounds awful.

I've had some very strange, trip-like experiences with high-quality, lab-verified CBD products that almost certainly have none or almost no THC. In high doses (I usually take 200+ mg and sometimes ~400-500) it can definitely be psychoactive, and I know quite a few people who've gotten very stoned on CBD oils labeled as having zero point something percent THC.

I wrote about my experiences more in this thread:

https://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/26395231

Glad to hear you don't feel your psyche is still too addled after the fact. Cannabis psychoses are not a joke and should be discussed more.


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“Strengthened by contemplation and study,
I will not fear my passions like a coward.
My body I will give to pleasures,
to diversions that I’ve dreamed of,
to the most daring erotic desires,
to the lustful impulses of my blood, without
any fear at all, for whenever I will—
and I will have the will, strengthened
as I’ll be with contemplation and study—
at the crucial moments I’ll recover
my spirit as was before: ascetic.”


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InvisibleGrateful Dead
A Growing Ambivalence
Male User Gallery


Registered: 11/19/12
Posts: 2,468
Loc: Parked Car, Playing NPR
Re: Gas Station CBD [Re: Lion]
    #26666545 - 05/12/20 01:14 PM (3 years, 9 months ago)

Thank you.

Yes, I ate what was labeled as 500mgs of CBD and did read that people who are susceptible to panic attacks on marijuana, can have panic attacks on pure CBD. However, I’ve smoked CBD flower and extract multiple times before without any anxiety. This experience was exactly like the life-changing, seizure invoking spice trips from my younger days.


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Life begins on the other side of despair...


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