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blackdragon999
Mason


Registered: 07/17/06
Posts: 202
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Mid Life Crisis 1
#26596017 - 04/12/20 03:35 PM (3 years, 9 months ago) |
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Be me.
Have a good job and get to travel the world and live on various continents with disposable time and income.
Have a beautiful loving wife with no marriage problems to speak of.
Have good health and a few good friends around.
Own multiple homes and have a stable retirement sufficient to retire comfortably 30 years early if you so choose.
...
The bottom line is the unhappiness. I am only half way though my life and I don't feel like anything is challenging anymore and I am feeling like I have lost all inspiration and drive that I had when I was younger. Everything that I have ever set out to do in my life seems like it has been accomplished already.
In all reality I would just like to quit my job and become a web developer. It sucks to say that success is very bad for me...because I have lost all my ideas, imagination and drive. I've been trying for years to think of great ideas for something to do online and even purchased a domain which now sits dormant like a blank piece of paper and I feel pathetic.
I'm an intermediate level programmer even though it has never been my profession. The internet has changed so much that I'm not even sure how to proceed. This is one of the communities that has survived quite a long time but I feel like it's mostly people my age and older on here.
I am clueless, I feel old and tired, and I don't understand the world anymore. I don't care about making money and sometimes wish I was dirt poor again living in an tiny apartment with nothing to my name. Maybe I just need to start spending more time here on The Shroomery.
Tell me what the internet is missing and perhaps I can make it a reality. Your thoughts/opinions are much appreciated.
Inspire me to do something except sit here and wait to die.
Thank you.
  
Edited by blackdragon999 (04/12/20 03:51 PM)
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spirit_shadow
Feature not a bug



Registered: 08/15/11
Posts: 25,665
Last seen: 23 minutes, 4 seconds
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learn a language. Then go to the country of said language and experience their culture. eat ome mushrooms
-------------------- ERROR 418 IM A TEAPOT.....(this account is automated, all posts related to illegal activities or advice thereof are strictly from numerous online sites and are for informational purposes only)- Circa 2011 Ban lotto
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blackdragon999
Mason


Registered: 07/17/06
Posts: 202
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Quote:
spirit_shadow said: learn a language. Then go to the country of said language and experience their culture. eat ome mushrooms 
I did that 10 years ago, and I ended up staying.
The only languages I am interested at this point are Python, Java, PHP, and C++
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Seriously_trippin
Cosmic Guru Ganesh



Registered: 07/12/13
Posts: 14,471
Last seen: 1 hour, 52 minutes
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You need people to talk,share and vent with so in ways this place is a great source of people who care. Share life experience, story and eventually friendships here or anyehere.
-------------------- R.I.P Zombi3, Blue Helix Modest Mouse Zappa Slothie That Kid With The face ShLong Le Canard split_by_nine & Big Worm Forever Etched in the sands of time in the shroomery and ever so beloved and deeply missed by many
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Seriously_trippin
Cosmic Guru Ganesh



Registered: 07/12/13
Posts: 14,471
Last seen: 1 hour, 52 minutes
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Also you have a challenge right now in being able to stay positive and finding a way to be happier. There's productive things to do talk to us here and use the internet and YouTube to find therapy in maybe meditation, psychedelic etc.
-------------------- R.I.P Zombi3, Blue Helix Modest Mouse Zappa Slothie That Kid With The face ShLong Le Canard split_by_nine & Big Worm Forever Etched in the sands of time in the shroomery and ever so beloved and deeply missed by many
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spirit_shadow
Feature not a bug



Registered: 08/15/11
Posts: 25,665
Last seen: 23 minutes, 4 seconds
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Nah you only need yourself. People die and some people are left with themselves. Anyway the mind is infinite. Then start learning those languages man buy some books and just do it
-------------------- ERROR 418 IM A TEAPOT.....(this account is automated, all posts related to illegal activities or advice thereof are strictly from numerous online sites and are for informational purposes only)- Circa 2011 Ban lotto
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blackdragon999
Mason


Registered: 07/17/06
Posts: 202
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Quote:
Seriously_trippin said: ...use the internet and YouTube to find therapy in maybe meditation, psychedelic etc.
That is surely the story of the past many years. My ultimate resource at this point is fresh ideas. This forum seems to have a people with a higher caliber of enlightenment and wisdom (don't laugh) than most places on the internet these days.
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blackdragon999
Mason


Registered: 07/17/06
Posts: 202
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Quote:
spirit_shadow said: Nah you only need yourself. People die and some people are left with themselves. Anyway the mind is infinite. Then start learning those languages man buy some books and just do it 
The languages are not an obstacle. I just need a clear vision. The internet sucks so badly nowadays so I know there is something to be done about that. It's only a matter of time.
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Northerner
splelling chceker


Registered: 07/29/12
Posts: 14,141
Loc: FNQ
Last seen: 39 minutes, 59 seconds
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Plant trees. Leave something behind that is greater than the sum of everything you have done and brings life. In hundreds of years those trees and their offspring will still be bringing life and joy to humans and creatures alike.
I'm also middle age, financially secure, happy family, yada, yada... I feel you man.
I started conservation work a few years ago. There are things you can do that can make a difference, give you the purpose you seek. I don't think you'll find them on the internet though.
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The nearest we ever come to knowing truth is when we are witness to paradox.
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blackdragon999
Mason


Registered: 07/17/06
Posts: 202
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Quote:
Northerner said: Plant trees. Leave something behind that is greater than the sum of everything you have done and brings life. In hundreds of years those trees and their offspring will still be bringing life and joy to humans and creatures alike.
I'm also middle age, financially secure, happy family, yada, yada... I feel you man.
I started conservation work a few years ago. There are things you can do that can make a difference, give you the purpose you seek. I don't think you'll find them on the internet though.
Ironically I did plant some trees some time ago but I'm never home to care much about them. I feel like I have something greater to contribute...but apparently not. I've become my disappointed uncle and my drunk grandfather all in one.
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zZZz
jesus


Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 33,478
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Amanita86
OTD Keymaster


Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
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Just appreciate being alive. Find value in just being.
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Orange clock, pencil "They threw me off the hay truck about noon..."
*Mark 15:34  Gam zeh ya’avor...
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blackdragon999
Mason


Registered: 07/17/06
Posts: 202
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Re: Mid Life Crisis [Re: zZZz] 1
#26596130 - 04/12/20 04:35 PM (3 years, 9 months ago) |
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Quote:
zZZz said:

Thanks bro.
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blackdragon999
Mason


Registered: 07/17/06
Posts: 202
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Re: Mid Life Crisis [Re: Amanita86] 1
#26596138 - 04/12/20 04:38 PM (3 years, 9 months ago) |
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Quote:
Amanita86 said: Just appreciate being alive. Find value in just being.
That's what sucks...I've got nothing but time to think about it because I've been stuck in this hotel for about 2 months now...waiting for this Covid to clear up so that I can fly out, many countries (including the one I'm trying to get to) have closed their borders...lots of time to sit and think.
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openmind
curious


Registered: 08/03/07
Posts: 13,866
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Quote:
blackdragon999 said: Be me.
Have a good job and get to travel the world and live on various continents with disposable time and income.
Have a beautiful loving wife with no marriage problems to speak of.
Have good health and a few good friends around.
Own multiple homes and have a stable retirement sufficient to retire comfortably 30 years early if you so choose.
...
Sounds rough

-OM
.
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Northerner
splelling chceker


Registered: 07/29/12
Posts: 14,141
Loc: FNQ
Last seen: 39 minutes, 59 seconds
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Sorry to hear you're locked down. Lots of people need the fucking huge wake up call that this turmoil is bringing.
Trees in a back yard are little more than natural ornaments. Though they will grow and give happiness too. In 50 years children will play under those trees you planted, build swings off their branches, carve their latest crushes name into the bark with a pen knife, and the tree will continue to grow. Life will be in it's branches and flow from it's leaves. Though one day same fool will decide it is too big for a back yard and cut it down.
What is greater than the gift of life and happiness? A website? How is a website going to make anyone's life any better? Sell more shit to them? Bring some sort of comfort or happiness to them? There's very few parts of the internet designed to do anything but make money. By the sounds of it you've already got enough money so that seems like a pretty futile act.
Planting a tree and walking away is one thing. But continuing to plant trees in areas that need them, and doing it again and again, then going back a few years later and seeing that the trees you planted are now 5 feet tall, knowing that in a few years the trees you are now planting are will be that big, that in 20 years those trees will tower above your head and be teeming with life. It's a sort of satisfaction that sits deep in your soul.
Working with a conservation group that is established really helps. I've visited areas my group visited 25 years ago, I have seen the difference these actions will make. Life is all about delayed gratification as you well know. Conservation work is just a different sort of delayed gratification. It's menial and quiet, it forces you to be alone with nature. It forces you to think deeper. Faith in the outcomes of your actions without ever truly being able to see them to their full potential is required.
You can take everything from a man but his beliefs.
Just throwing it out there. Other people have gone and sat on a mountain for a year until they sort this out, others just fall deeper into the trap of trying to make their fictitious numbers bigger and bigger.
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The nearest we ever come to knowing truth is when we are witness to paradox.
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blackdragon999
Mason


Registered: 07/17/06
Posts: 202
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Re: Mid Life Crisis [Re: openmind]
#26596186 - 04/12/20 04:57 PM (3 years, 9 months ago) |
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Quote:
openmind said:
Quote:
blackdragon999 said: Be me.
Have a good job and get to travel the world and live on various continents with disposable time and income.
Have a beautiful loving wife with no marriage problems to speak of.
Have good health and a few good friends around.
Own multiple homes and have a stable retirement sufficient to retire comfortably 30 years early if you so choose.
...
Sounds rough

-OM
.
If you ever get to that point...you will understand.
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Tripsurfer
Bring Back Asante!



Registered: 08/01/12
Posts: 7,129
Loc: West of Windward
Last seen: 3 months, 27 days
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I think you need a fast red convertible and a girlfriend half your age 
Perhaps buy a motorcycle and join one of those clubs where they give you leather jackets with skulls on them
-------------------- Ach en wee ben ik de klos, met mijn boog schoot ik een albatros... A philosopher is a person who knows less and less about more and more, until he knows nothing about everything.

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blackdragon999
Mason


Registered: 07/17/06
Posts: 202
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Quote:
Northerner said: Sorry to hear you're locked down. Lots of people need the fucking huge wake up call that this turmoil is bringing.
Trees in a back yard are little more than natural ornaments. Though they will grow and give happiness too. In 50 years children will play under those trees you planted, build swings off their branches, carve their latest crushes name into the bark with a pen knife, and the tree will continue to grow. Life will be in it's branches and flow from it's leaves. Though one day same fool will decide it is too big for a back yard and cut it down.
What is greater than the gift of life and happiness? A website? How is a website going to make anyone's life any better? Sell more shit to them? Bring some sort of comfort or happiness to them? There's very few parts of the internet designed to do anything but make money. By the sounds of it you've already got enough money so that seems like a pretty futile act.
Planting a tree and walking away is one thing. But continuing to plant trees in areas that need them, and doing it again and again, then going back a few years later and seeing that the trees you planted are now 5 feet tall, knowing that in a few years the trees you are now planting are will be that big, that in 20 years those trees will tower above your head and be teeming with life. It's a sort of satisfaction that sits deep in your soul.
Working with a conservation group that is established really helps. I've visited areas my group visited 25 years ago, I have seen the difference these actions will make. Life is all about delayed gratification as you well know. Conservation work is just a different sort of delayed gratification. It's menial and quiet, it forces you to be alone with nature. It forces you to think deeper. Faith in the outcomes of your actions without ever truly being able to see them to their full potential is required.
You can take everything from a man but his beliefs.
Just throwing it out there. Other people have gone and sat on a mountain for a year until they sort this out, others just fall deeper into the trap of trying to make their fictitious numbers bigger and bigger.
I would like to get away from everything but I just end up feeling restless in nature. Hard to relax and slow down.
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blackdragon999
Mason


Registered: 07/17/06
Posts: 202
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Quote:
Tripsurfer said: I think you need a fast red convertible and a girlfriend half your age 
Perhaps buy a motorcycle and join one of those clubs where they give you leather jackets with skulls on them
I live in a place where every girl is half my age and every vehicle is a motorcycle. Maybe if I grow a mustache and have all those things...I can be a real 80's man.
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