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InvisibletrendalM
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Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong?
    #2658115 - 05/09/04 07:25 PM (19 years, 10 months ago)

Well I've already come to my own conclusion on this...but I always like to have other opinions for balance :wink:

I've always been a solitary kind of guy, but I've noticed over the past few years it has gotten a lot "worse".

When I was a kid, I probably spent 50% of my free time with friends, and 50% alone. I was always the one being asked to do something, never the one asking others. If no one asked me to do anything, I generally spent my time alone. I had a lot of friends though, so I spent at least as much time with friends as without.

As the years have gone by, with through several moves, my group of friends living close by got much smaller. I don't have a licence or a car, so again I generally only go out or hang around with friends if they ask me to come out. I spend less and less of my free time with other people and more time alone.

Up until the new year I was living with 4 good friends of mine. They are all pretty sociable guys, so I spent quite a lot of time with other people. I still would not really seek out the company so much as it came to me. I would go 4-5 days without leaving the house at times, but a LOT of people would come over in that time so I wasn't alone too much.

After new years I moved home to my mother's house. I have a few friends close by but I hardly ever go out to see them. I have friends at work and see a couple of them outside of work now and then...but for the most part I'm spending nearly all my free time alone.

The sudden change from a huge circle of friends and almost constant social activity to zero close friends and almost no social activity should have made a difference to me, I think. It hasn't. I feel fine, no different than I did before.

Recently I have even started declining invitations from friends or just not showing up. I haven't been out of the house aside from work in almost a month.

So, I think I'm becoming a hermit...

And I have nothing wrong with it :smile:

Some of you know that I have never enjoyed society. I think it has had the effect of a rather constant push to stay away from it, when possible.

Is this a "bad" thing? Even if I enjoy spending my time alone?


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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.

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Offlinekosmic_charlie
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2658143 - 05/09/04 07:32 PM (19 years, 10 months ago)

I don't think there's anything wrong with it as long as you're happy. I'm a bit of a hermit myself, at least compared to how my social life was before I graduated college. I enjoy my time alone but sometimes I do get lonely and I wish I had a significant other (not necessarily more friends) to share my life with. But it sounds like you're happy in your current situation so be glad. A man that can learn to be happy all by himself is a truly prosporous man.


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Goin' where the water tastes like wine.

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InvisibletrendalM
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2658146 - 05/09/04 07:32 PM (19 years, 10 months ago)

PS: Though I spend a lot of time on the Internet, I don't do much socializing online! I chat with friends every now and then but they're always the ones to message me unless I have something specific to ask them (and which I can't find elsewhere on my own).


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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.

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Invisiblesilversoul7
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2658157 - 05/09/04 07:35 PM (19 years, 10 months ago)

You and me are pretty much in the same boat. Although I have friends at home that I hang out with, here at college I have none, but that's ok. I'm totally content with being by myself. The Shroomery is my social circle. Since moving in into this dorm last fall, I've been to 2 1/2 gatherings(I'm counting a rave as half) and met lots of people from this board. On a day-to-day basis, though, I'm alone, and that's just fine with me. I figure if you're happy with it, then there's nothing wrong with it.


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"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."--Voltaire

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InvisibletrendalM
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: silversoul7]
    #2658161 - 05/09/04 07:37 PM (19 years, 10 months ago)

I figure if you're happy with it, then there's nothing wrong with it.

That's the conclusion I had come to, too :wink:


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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.

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OfflineViaggio
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2658333 - 05/09/04 08:20 PM (19 years, 10 months ago)

Sorry to burst your bubble, fellas, but I wouldn't classify someone who socializes on message boards (instead of coffee shops, bars, etc) as a hermit.  You're just dorks :smile: (like myself).


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"...yet another in a long series of diversions an attempt to avoid responsibility."

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InvisibletrendalM
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Viaggio]
    #2658370 - 05/09/04 08:27 PM (19 years, 10 months ago)

Read again:
PS: Though I spend a lot of time on the Internet, I don't do much socializing online! I chat with friends every now and then but they're always the ones to message me unless I have something specific to ask them (and which I can't find elsewhere on my own).

What I'm getting at here is my total lack of an urge to socialize or be around other people. Some days I don't care if there's people around or not...other days I don't want other people around. In most cases, thoughts about other people are out of my head 60s after the person is out of my sight :smirk:


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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.

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OfflineHypnoToad
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Viaggio]
    #2658402 - 05/09/04 08:33 PM (19 years, 10 months ago)

trendal Of course its not normal but normal is quite overrated.I personally sometimes go up to weeks without leaving my house especially in winter simply because I have no desire to go outside and I have no friends period.I have no friends because I will not associate with superficial people and thats all there really is out here.People who think life is all about nails and fashion(girls) and people who think its all about the hottest girl and the fastes or best car(guys).THey've not a single real thought in their heads.No desire,no ambition,no goals or purpose.I frankly,dont have aword to say to these sort of people...they wont understand anything I try to tell them.I've always been solitary.I forge my own path.If people follow in my path so be it...if no one follows so be it.While I wont stop people from following in my path I wont encourage them to and if they leave at some point I really dont care.It's just who I am and how I am.I dont think Im meant for socializing.


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"There is no fire like lust, no grip like hate, no net like delusions, no river like craving."


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Offlinedaba
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2658675 - 05/09/04 11:31 PM (19 years, 10 months ago)

Dear trendal:

It is not ok to be a hermit. It is horribly, horribly wrong.

:goes back into his cave:

Love,
daba


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Fold for The Shroomery!

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InvisibletrendalM
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: daba]
    #2659203 - 05/10/04 10:29 AM (19 years, 10 months ago)

:lol:


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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.

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Anonymous #1

Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2659223 - 05/10/04 10:43 AM (19 years, 10 months ago)

in the last two years ive been out of my house about 20 times only for doc appointments and two binge drinks, i have heaps of family so i'm never alone,when i think of the outside world i think of that rat in a cage song cause the world IS a vampire
i havent been to a night club or party since  before that time cause i feel everyones a bullshitter anyway and ive never liked crowds and i aint missing out on much so your in great company :wink:

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OfflineProtester
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: ]
    #2661855 - 05/11/04 02:52 AM (19 years, 10 months ago)

I hear ya man iv a bit like that myself but i hate it and like you i have no car no license or no free money to fix either of those problems.  I was living in Chattanooga with one of my close friends and me and him had a falling out cause one of our mutural friends up there got mad at me for listening to the rap station at work cause he didnt want to and wanted to beat my ass over it.  I was like man this is silly we are supposed to be friends and iv listened to shit and gone places iv hadn't really wanted to but i didnt say anything cause we are friends so i dont understand it iv tried to but i cant and this is some silly shit so he finnaly got so mad he went in the house and slammed the door behind him and i got in my friends car and left since then he told my friend that i couldn't go over to his house which wasnt any sweat off my back but my friend who i have known for years totally kicks me aside and i spent 2 weeks straight w/0 leaving the apartment except going to work.  The about a week ago he says hed like for me to move out when the lease was up.  So i said fuck it called my old boss from back home got my old job back with a 15 min phone call and moved back home 2 days later leaveing that little mutha fucker to pay the rest of the rent solo.  Now im back home and kicking it with my friends but i still like to have some time to myself :smile:

Just do what ya gotta do man to feel good thats what im doing man and dont let any one judge you for that and your real friends will respect you still.


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I work my shitty 9-5 and I pay my taxes, I'm not hurting anybody else. So why do you care what i do in my spare time.

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Offlinel0st
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2665351 - 05/11/04 08:38 PM (19 years, 10 months ago)

its fine if u don't don't care now and just want to do your own thing. but perhaps one day you will feel the need for interaction moreso and you won't have the social skills or contacts available to meet your needs. it can be a very frustrating thing , so why not at least try to be out once in a while so you don't get out of touch with yourself and stick to compulsive addictions.

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Offlinedaba
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2672315 - 05/13/04 04:07 AM (19 years, 10 months ago)

By the way trendal, I believe you knew in advance the responses you were going to get to such a, dare I say, banal question :wink:.


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Fold for The Shroomery!

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OfflineDreamer987
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2672366 - 05/13/04 05:14 AM (19 years, 10 months ago)


come out of your shell little hermit crab.  Go mingle with the shrimps, n the lobsters, n the mock turtles.    dance in the sunlight and denounce your shell

:shiftyeyes:
uhhh i gotta go now, even i'm gettin alittle to wierd on me


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Offlinefilthysock
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Dreamer987]
    #2672556 - 05/13/04 07:31 AM (19 years, 10 months ago)

Thats a cool looking animal.

Anyway, I totally ahve the hermit qualifications. I'm good company for myself and I feel I justify my life by being by myself, I get to do productive and interesting things that seem to be important for a future I'm hoping for.

Besides, like a hermit, I think think think and I write write and write.

So I think its totally cool to be a hermit... but what I'm missing is a hermit friend, someone I can be on the same level with, I dont have that... well I do, but he's one in the crowd of my friends and I'm never with him alone and rarwely get on that level with him. See I'm surrounded by friends who are very immature and use immature humor. I have nothing against immaturity (I even despise using that word) aand I dont believ in using that word, I get immature and playful myself and I see it as the only way of connecting with my group of friends... but my dominating persona is a lazy philosophing hermit kind, just lazy in the sense that I'm sometimes to lazy to do fun things it seems unimportant and boring to me often.

I wish I was more playful and social by nature though and could reallyt get myself out of my hermit shell and keep my playful persona up for longer periods of time... it seriously like lifting weights sometimes... it strains me out. I'm getting old (and only 19), lol.

What I really want to post here, for all you hermits is this,
realize this, that play, fun, games and friends are the very essence of life, the most important and crucial matter to living... so its worth the effort to keep that up.

I have a very very trust worthy friend/father figure/mentor person who is always reminding me about this... its hard sometimes, to get myself out of my hermit shell... but trust me... its the only thing we exist for.


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Magic mushrooms are not addictive, the shroomery is!

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Anonymous #1

Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2672762 - 05/13/04 08:38 AM (19 years, 10 months ago)

Its a totaly fine thing. But the question is do you want to be alone for your whole life? Cuz one day you might find that it will be to late to change your ways. I feel where you are coming from. A good friend of the family that watched my whole lofe unfold told my mom that I was born to late that she feels that I should have been born when Hobos were aplenty.

For me I would rather deal with people now. Find a woman and disapear up to my cabin to live my life out up in the hills alone with my girl.

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InvisibleSpeeker

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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2672964 - 05/13/04 09:52 AM (19 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

trendal said:
Is this a "bad" thing? Even if I enjoy spending my time alone?




no. just don't put a label on yourself.

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Anonymous #1

Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2680686 - 05/14/04 11:55 PM (19 years, 10 months ago)

I'm the biggest hermit here. I got you all beat.

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Anonymous #1

Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: ]
    #2682107 - 05/15/04 12:04 PM (19 years, 10 months ago)

Ah but do you live under a bridge in the woods?

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Offlinemr_kite
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: ]
    #2685645 - 05/16/04 04:20 AM (19 years, 10 months ago)

You'll never be happy till you are yourself. Being happy's much more important than conforming.

WHy'd anyone want to conform anyway?


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let yourself be silently drawn by the stronger pull of what you really love

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Offlinedaba
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: mr_kite]
    #2685663 - 05/16/04 04:35 AM (19 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

mr_kite said:
WHy'd anyone want to conform anyway?




Because they are insecure with themselves.


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Fold for The Shroomery!

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InvisibleKthxBye
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2686779 - 05/16/04 02:25 PM (19 years, 10 months ago)

I too am a hermit...or have the capability to become one anyways.
I too have friends back home but at college havn't really met anyone I'd consider more than an aquaintence. I'm pretty much known on the floor as "that quiet pothead"

I enjoy socializing, sometimes, but the constant flow of strangers with whom I'm supposed to chat drags at my consciousness.

I've always been a loner, an outsider...never really "got on the team" if you know what I mean. I remember in second grade, when the redskins were in the superbowl we were given a big strip of paper and markers to make a banner supporting them. I spent my time hiding "go cowboys" in the other kid's hometown pride.

The TV was covered with 10 second shots of people saying "go skins". Its the only time I cared about football. I desperately wanted them to lose.

Rebel without a cause I guess.


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I know what he wants: a drag of smooth tobbacco blended with the finest Turkish Turkweed. Here, have a toke on me you dumb beast.

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Invisiblewandrnshaman
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2699390 - 05/18/04 11:49 PM (19 years, 9 months ago)

When you get lonely, something's wrong. Till then, do whatever. Normalcy is very subjective.

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OfflineStrumpling
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2699405 - 05/18/04 11:54 PM (19 years, 9 months ago)

The only thing wrong with one being a hermit would be if said hermit thought there was something wrong with being a hermit.


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Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE

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InvisibletrendalM
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Strumpling]
    #2699728 - 05/19/04 01:56 AM (19 years, 9 months ago)

Said hermit rather enjoys it :smile:


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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.

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OfflineDoctorJ
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2700506 - 05/19/04 09:42 AM (19 years, 9 months ago)

I fucking wish I could be that much of a hermit and not feel bad about it. keep up the good work!

I'm not too fond of society either, but the instinctual need to socialize keeps me going out and hanging with people I really dont care for that much. I think if i could cut that part of my brain out that wants me to socialize, I would be a much happier hermit.

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Offlinemad_hatter
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2703409 - 05/19/04 09:43 PM (19 years, 9 months ago)

maybe have you considered your friends point of view? i mean if your happy and content then by all means be who you are. but also think how you might be disapointing them cus they wanted to chill with you and instead you blew em off to hang by yourself. does that make sense?but anyways do what you know will make you happy i geuss

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InvisibletrendalM
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: mad_hatter]
    #2703450 - 05/19/04 09:51 PM (19 years, 9 months ago)

I have a few GOOD friends who I do hang out with now and then, and enjoy it. It's not like they're calling me every day begging me to come hang out or anything :smirk:

My close friends all understand who and what I am...I don't think they are hurt in any way by my absence!


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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.

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Offlinejono
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2704295 - 05/20/04 01:11 AM (19 years, 9 months ago)

After reading this thread Its put a smile on my face to see so many fellow hermits :smile:

But on a more serious note, in a similar fashion to most of you it seems, I am a very socialable person when I am around friends, or when the time and place calls for it, but by and large I enjoy spending time alone, and of late have been spending longer and longer periods isolated from society, friends, and the 'world.'

Im sure like anything it has good and bad points about it, but to add something not previously discussed, I thought id give Alan Watts imput on the issue of being a hermit (copy pasted from Self and Other) (I hope people dont mind such a large copy paste, but Alan Watts really is a pleasure to read, and It is worthwhile and relevant imho)

From Alan Watts 'Self and Other' - Lecture

'....In other words, look at the number of people we know who are terrified of silence, and who have to have something going all the time, some noise streaming into their ears. They're doing that because of their intense sense of loneliness. And so when they feel silent, they feel lonely and they want to escape from it. Or people who just want to get together. As we say, they want to escape from themselves. More people spend more time running away from themselves. Isn't that wretched? What a definition. What an experience of self if it's something you've always got to be running away from and forgetting. Say you read a mystery story. Why? So you forget yourself. You join a religion. Why? To forget yourself. You get absorbed in a political movement. Why? To forget yourself. Well it must be a pretty miserable kind of self if you have to forget it like that. Now for a person who doesn't have an isolated sense of self, he has no need to run away from it, because he knows.

Let's take hermits. People today think being a hermit is a very unhealthy thing to do. Very antisocial, doesn't contribute anything to everybody else - because everybody else is busy contributing like blazes, and a few people have to run off and get out of the way. But I'll tell you what hermits realize. If you go off into a far, far forest and get very quiet, you'll come to understand that you're connected with everything........But you see, the hermit finds this out through his solitide

But the point is that a human represents a certain kind of development, wherein a maximal sense of his oneness with the whole universe goes hand in hand with the maximum development of his personality as somebody unique and different. Whereas the people who are of course trying to develop their personality directly and taking a Dale Carnegie course on how to win friends and influence people, or how to become successful - all those people come out as if they came from the same cookie cutter. They don't have any personality......"



With Metta,

Jono.


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Our problem results from acting like cowboys on a limitless frontier when in truth we inhabit a living spaceship with a finely balanced life-support system." David C. Korton

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OfflineRenegade8
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #2705188 - 05/20/04 10:43 AM (19 years, 9 months ago)

I agree with everyone here - there's nothing wrong with being a hermit if you're happy with it. I tend to go in phases where I'll go out a lot for awhile then switch back into hermit mode for a month or two. Although, even when I'm going out a lot, I like being able to go home by myself when I'm done with people for the night.


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I'm just see-through faded, super jaded, and out of my mind. - R.I.P. Layne

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OfflineDF2K
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Renegade8]
    #4212765 - 05/24/05 12:17 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

im a hermit aswell, and im quite happy with it

if anyone was interrested, societys veiw of a hermit asbeing a *disorder*

http://www.mentalhealth.com/dis1/p21-pe02.html

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InvisibletrendalM
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: DF2K]
    #4215032 - 05/24/05 04:22 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

I wouldn't necessarily link "hermit" with "schizoid", as Schizoid generally includes a large degree of anti-social attitudes, whereas the bulk of "hermits" who have replied here don't so much show an "anti" social attitude...just a lack of any need for much socialization.


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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.

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InvisibleJellric
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4216863 - 05/24/05 11:54 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

I guess the big unanswered question is "What is the nature of your inner life?" Do you genuinely want to help people or does the idea of venturing out and killing a homeless person give you an erection?

You seem like a harmless person to me, but perhaps you are harboring some sick, twisted thoughts in your gourd and you don't want it getting out. You maintain a mask of sanity for the outer world all the while you are dreaming of taking the stage in some grotesque fashion and ripping open your chest to reveal your blackened vegetable heart.

Just some thoughts.

I think you are pretty normal in most ways. If you want I can venture up there and sort you out the next time I am in your neck of the woods.


--------------------
I AM what Willis was talkin' bout.

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InvisibleNemo_Hoes
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4217381 - 05/25/05 03:37 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

I dabbled in it, I prefer being alone. My friends are cool. But it sucks when there aint shit too do. It's better being bored alone then bored in groups.


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Offlinenonoman
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: jono]
    #4217558 - 05/25/05 06:16 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Nice job with the Alan Watts quote!


I just find very few people interesting enough to socialize with. The kind of people who post here are few and far between IRL.


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InvisibleLe_Canard
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4219083 - 05/25/05 03:58 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Count me in as a hermit too!  :laugh:

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InvisibleautomanM
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4220822 - 05/25/05 11:13 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

here is a tad bit of perspective on some self proclaimed hermits:
trendal - Posts: 10081
ToiletDuk - Posts: 10386
DF2K - Posts: 4458
daba - Posts: 3563
silversoul7 - Posts: 27301
kosmic_charlie - Posts: 3222
total posts: 59011
hermits in example: /6

aveage post per" hermits" = 9835

whether you believe you are socializing or not, seems to me like you are.

from dictionary.com:
her?mit Audio pronunciation of "hermit" ( P ) Pronunciation Key (h?rmt)
n.

A person who has withdrawn from society and lives a solitary existence; a recluse.



the fact that you participate in a society, even an online society like the shroomery, shows that you arent a hermit. you're just a person that choses o interact digitally instead of physically.


--------------------
No, no, you're not thinking, you're just being logical. ~ Niels Bohr

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InvisibletrendalM
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: automan]
    #4251717 - 06/03/05 09:30 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Well if you read my first post, I don't think/consider myself a "hermit" now...but there is a real possibility (and some wish) to become one in the future (possibly near).

My life has been a slow move towards less socialization as time goes on.

I also need to point out the fact, again, that it is not so much anti-social tendancies...just a near-total lack of need for socialization. I get tired very quickly when I socialize with others...and I tend to feel "better" the longer I go without socializing.


But yeah, 10,000+ posts is getting a little silly :grin:


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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.

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OfflineWysefool
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Nemo_Hoes]
    #4251931 - 06/03/05 10:58 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

master_shake said:
I dabbled in it, I prefer being alone. My friends are cool. But it sucks when there aint shit too do. It's better being bored alone then bored in groups.




:yesnod:

Even if it's just somebody asking if I want to come over and smoke a joint, come over and watch a movie (if it's a good one I haven't seen). The other day my friend called me up because he was moving back into his parent's house and he mentioned something about me helping him move stuff from the truck into his room. Even if it's just a task like that it's fine because I feel like I'm DOING something, otherwise I don't see the point, if I want to talk to somebody I'll instant message them.

I just don't see why people feel the need to stand in a circle and flap their gums about meaningless things. Maybe it's just the people I observe, when I'm with my good friends there doesn't seem to be any problem. I guess it really helps to have similar interests and me and my friends have some pretty odd interests.  :crazy2: :mushroom2:

Nice thing about forums is you can choose a community of likeminded people and then even further within that choose the topics to discuss. Maybe I just need to convince my friends to visit messageboards more often.  :rolleyes:


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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4253233 - 06/03/05 05:50 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Is this a "bad" thing? Even if I enjoy spending my time alone?



\


Man, my PC has been in the shop for over a week and this is the first post i've seen here where i felt a need to respond: Pls know, that when my company of @ 8 years folded that the first place i looked for gainfull employment was as a lighthouse keeper, no lie(they are now all automated :frown: ). So much do i enjoy my own company that i really don't give 2(or even 3) shitz if i ever see another human being as long as i live.

Having said that however, i'm not really anti social as much as i am non social, if having human company once in a while is an improvement over my solitary state(rarely) then i embrace the opportuninty :wink:

Do w/e feels right, if you feel/have a reclusive nature then go for it man :smile:As long as you're not the next unibomber or some such thing sitting out in the middle of nowhere plotting mass destruction on the society you have freely rejected then just chill man :grin:


--------------------
"Being crazier than a shithouse rat is not sufficient grounds for banishment"


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InvisibletrendalM
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: FreakQlibrium]
    #4253299 - 06/03/05 06:09 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

:lol:

No no, I'm far too much of a pacifist for any kind of violence :smirk:


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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.

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InvisibleFreakQlibrium
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4253308 - 06/03/05 06:14 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Hard to plant the seeds of universal mass destruction when you're laying down face first in a muddy culvert :grin:


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InvisibletrendalM
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: FreakQlibrium]
    #4253313 - 06/03/05 06:15 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Hey at least the landing was smack-on :wink:


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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.

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InvisibleFreakQlibrium
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4253360 - 06/03/05 06:32 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Well at least you didn't light the soles(too drunk to know a poor spelling from a right one right now :grin:) of your running shoes on fire :wink:


--------------------
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Offlinekotik
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: FreakQlibrium]
    #4916597 - 11/10/05 05:22 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

hah, don't worry about it so much man. That quote pretty much said anything I could have hoped to express, but at the same time it is good to have friends to chill with, if for nothing else than to relate to a real person for a while, instead of people on a forum.

Nothing wrong at all with spending time online, but once you start associating being "social" with being "online" then it could just as easily lead to other problems, probably sharing symptoms of what could be considered an addiction of sorts.

Quote:

.I have no friends because I will not associate with superficial people and thats all there really is out here.People who think life is all about nails and fashion(girls) and people who think its all about the hottest girl and the fastes or best car(guys).THey've not a single real thought in their heads.No desire,no ambition,no goals or purpose.I frankly,dont have aword to say to these sort of people...they wont understand anything I try to tell them.




sometimes i fall into this pattern of thinking as well, but you really have to realize that whenever you start getting bitter over this stuff, its probably because you are seeing some of these faults in yourself, and perhaps they are brought out more when you are around others. Shutting people out because you silently judge them as being unworthy of friendship, or incapable of an important thought is not really helping anyone in the long run... hurts them, because they miss out on having a friend, and it hurts you because you will just continue to convince yourself of your great ability to judge others by their idle chat, becoming more and more arrogant as time goes on.


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No statements made in any post or message by myself should be construed to mean that I am now, or have ever been, participating in or considering participation in any activities in violation of any local, state, or federal laws. All posts are works of fiction.

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InvisibleIcelander
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Renegade8]
    #4916632 - 11/10/05 06:07 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
   

The only thing wrong is that you need to ask. :wink:

Besides if you get lonely you have me to talk at. :heart:


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
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OfflineBooby
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4916800 - 11/10/05 07:33 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

Like grains of sand are we
In transition
On the shores of a boundless sea
Our position
In contact with life on Mars
(My ambition)
And plasma circling stars

Edited by Booby (11/10/05 03:31 PM)

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InvisibleSimisu
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Booby]
    #4919658 - 11/10/05 07:59 PM (18 years, 4 months ago)

do you know the reasons why you rather stay alone?
don't you want to have wild passionate sex with lot's of fine looking ladys?
don't you wish you could presue your desires outside of fantasy?

i ask these same questions my self (you described my behaviure pretty well in your first post so...)
but i'm not as comfrtable being this way my self!
my self asteem has gone down the drain since i found out WHY i was this way and changing my self is an on going battle...
i've deprived my friends of my presence becouse i came to feel like i had nothing to bring to the situation... i didn't care where we went i didn't care what we did as long as i could enjoy my friends company but then i got bored, numb... just sat there and had nothing to contribute... it freaked me out! all we ever did was smoke pot and talk and all I had to talk about was my self and how stuck i feel...
being home is being safe, confident, nothing can hurt me here!
but out there - socializing - you're never sure, you just don't know!

my guess is that the only reason you're still statisfied with the situation is becouse of your friends that have an interest in you (selfish of course) and you don't mind providing that intrest becouse you're comfrtable being dragged along for whatever reason?

i hate putting up posts like this one since i could be SO dead wrong and have the biggest misconseption of you and the situation but i've spent a while writing this so might as well post it :smirk:


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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Simisu]
    #4919836 - 11/10/05 08:56 PM (18 years, 4 months ago)

i think even non hermits can relate to just about everything mentioned so far.


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OfflineDreamer987
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: kotik]
    #4920736 - 11/11/05 12:59 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

I can't really relate. I need social interaction.
I care about friendship more than anything. There have been times when i hermit up, but its usually because i'm depressed, and not having friends around makes me even more depressed.
If thats what you wana do thats fine, but disapearing and rejecting your friends isn't really right. Its hard for the average person to understand that you dont want to be around people in general. Not just them.
Frienships can be seriously damaged, and fade out when neglected. If your not there for your friends, you might look up one day and realize that they aren't there for you anymore either.


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InvisibletrendalM
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Simisu]
    #4920893 - 11/11/05 01:53 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

do you know the reasons why you rather stay alone?

It's not that I would rather be alone, I just don't feel much need or desire to be social. I am social at times, but almost 100% of the time the interaction is initiated by my friends, not me.

don't you want to have wild passionate sex with lot's of fine looking ladys?

No, actually. I don't feel any great need or desire to get laid very often. It's cool when I get some, but I don't miss it much when I don't get any. I'd also rather not have to many sexual partners (I've had 2) in my life.

don't you wish you could presue your desires outside of fantasy?

I'm not entirely sure what you mean by that. I pursue many desires outside of fantasy - most of them just happen to be done on my own.

I certainly don't feel that I have nothing to contribute to my friends. I know I do, just like I know they have things that they contribute to me. I'm sure that's part of the reason my friends are my friends - we compliment each other's strengths and cover each other's weaknesses. I tend to think I have a very good understanding of what I have to offer my friends. I rarely feel unappreciated in return. I enjoy the time I do spend around my friends (obviously, or I wouldn't spend time with them).

On the other hand I don't find I have a lot of need for friends. I don't need anything from my friends. I appreciate what I get, but if I don't get it from them I'll just find it on my own. I think I have a rich private life - I can pretty much always find something intensely interesting to occupy myself with.

Again the big thing I need to point out is that I don't feel anti-social so much as un-social (at least most of the time). I go out with my friends on occasion. I hang out with them in private more often.

Right now I see people outside of my immediate family about once every 1-2 weeks. That seems to be enough for me - as I said I don't feel any need/desire to go seek out direct interaction with other people. I used to socialize an aweful lot more - all day every day - but I didn't have any need/desire at that time either. It just happened to be how often my friends hung around with me.

I dunno. I think I'm rambling by this point :smirk:


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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.

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InvisibletrendalM
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4920902 - 11/11/05 01:56 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

I think the only thing that causes me problems with respect to being un-social is that sometimes people who are close to me, usually family, seem to think that I am missing out on something. They think I "should" be more sociable.


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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.

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Offlinekotik
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4921041 - 11/11/05 04:12 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

I can't really relate. I need social interaction.




come on now.. even if you are not a hermit, im sure you can relate to what is being said here.  :rolleyes:

if not, you are lying to yourself  :blush:


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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: kotik]
    #4932482 - 11/14/05 01:37 PM (18 years, 4 months ago)

same boat. however I just went a little further with this girl I know at work who seems to be alot more sociable then me. I'm going to try it out for a time and see how it is... on the '''other side'''...

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OfflineDreamer987
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: kotik]
    #4932840 - 11/14/05 02:55 PM (18 years, 4 months ago)

"come on now.. even if you are not a hermit, im sure you can relate to what is being said here.
if not, you are lying to yourself"

no, no I understand. I have alot of Hermit tendencys that i have had to overcome, but i'm the oposite. I hate it. Being alone feeds depression, and anti-social behaviors.


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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Dreamer987]
    #4936059 - 11/15/05 04:27 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

I was a hermit for a long time... Just staying in my room and only coming down to get something to eat... I didn't go out much and if I did it was just for a trip to the coffeeshop or for smoking a bowl or a joint...

I never wanted to go to a disco or anything... The girls I've dated were all way too outgoing... Which sucked cause I wasn't like that...

Even now I don't go out that much... I'm 19 but I only go out on holidays... Just going to a party a couple of times but nothing more... Even if I do go to a party usually I get too drunk or too stoned to talk so I'm not sociable either...


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Offlinekotik
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Brakkie]
    #4936125 - 11/15/05 06:04 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

I blame my less-than-social lifestyle on the simple fact that I do not consume alcohol, and I do not like to smoke in public (or in cars).

Even if I go out with lots of friends, they all drink and I don't.. so it always puts me between 2 options:

1 - Be the fucking drunk caddy with people being loud and sloppy because I am the only one not drunk, so somehow I turn into the Designated Driver

or

2 - Get caught up into drunken arguments, fist fights, or end up in a car with some drunk driving way too fast after dark, and fumbling with the car radio, cigarette, cellphone, and yelling at semi-fine girls at red lights. (mind you, none of this is even mildly amusing when you are sober)

am i missing something other than a decent group of friends?


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Offlineheadset
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: kotik]
    #4950125 - 11/18/05 03:06 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

"I find it wholesome to be alone the greater part of the time. To be in company, even with the best, is soon wearisome and dissipating. I love to be alone. I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude. We are for the most part more lonely when we go abroad among men than when we stay in our chambers. A man thinking or working is always alone, let him be where he will. Solitude is not measured by the miles of space that intervene between a man and his fellows. The really diligent student in one of the crowded hives of Cambridge College is as solitary as a dervis in the desert. The farmer can work alone in the field or the woods all day, hoeing or chopping, and not feel lonesome, because he is employed; but when he comes home at night he cannot sit down in a room alone, at the mercy of his thoughts, but must be where he can 'see the folks,' and recreate, and, as he thinks, remunerate himself for his day's solitude; and hence he wonders how the student can sit alone in the house all night and most of the day without ennui and 'the blues'; but he does not realize that the student, though in the house, is still at work in his field, and chopping in his woods, as the farmer in his, and in turn seeks the same recreation and society that the latter does, though it may be a more condensed form of it. Society is commonly too cheap. We meet at very short intervals, not having had time to acquire any new value for each other. We meet at meals three times a day, and give each other a new taste of that old musty cheese that we are. We have had to agree on a certain set of rules, called etiquette and politeness, to make this frequent meeting tolerable and that we need not come to open war. We meet at the post-office, and at the sociable, and about the fireside every night; we live thick and are in each other's way, and stumble over one another, and I think that we thus lose some respect for one another. Certainly less frequency would suffice for all important and hearty communications."

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Offlinekotik
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: headset]
    #4950483 - 11/18/05 04:59 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

awesome  :thumbup:


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OfflineMcdoopy
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: kotik]
    #4951135 - 11/18/05 10:23 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

Friends and family are an essential ingredient to happiness.

You shouldn't isolate yourself.

Not good for the mind or soul.

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OfflineTangerines
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Mcdoopy]
    #4951557 - 11/18/05 12:44 PM (18 years, 4 months ago)

When I chill with my friends we just smoke and end up sitting there for hours on end. I'd much rather smoke alone and listen to some music or play some games by myself then do that. So I guess if there is something to do I enjoy being with people but otherwise I enjoy being alone sitting in my basement.

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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4955537 - 11/19/05 11:42 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

"In The Hermit card, the 9th card of the Tarot, the teachers of the Ageless Wisdom are providing us with a future view of the outcome of our soul's successful struggle to reach the highest level of earthly/spiritual enlightenment possible... an attainment that is attributable to and obtainable through continued discipline, diligence and dedication to the laws of Divine living.

As we view the card, most of us get a sense that The Hermit is an isolated, solitary being, one who prefers a private existence apart from the extravagance and superficiality of materialistic living. Largely that's true, but the real message he wishes to impart is just how important it is for you and I (if we wish to reach his level of attainment) to set our values above materialism's fascinations and temporal attunements. Notice that he is pictured standing on the highest peak among the surrounding mountains. In his right hand he holds a lantern which appears to be lighting his way. Actually, the lantern's light is intended for seekers, others like you and I, who are still climbing and struggling up the mountainside below him. Notice that he is looking down, watching our progress. According to Carl Jung he is very concerned and most protective of our efforts. He is really that part of us, the Divine within, that is ready to provide us instant direction and truth. We have but to go within... to ask for healing, guidance or forgiveness. For all who seek, loving support and enrichment will be returned to you many fold."

Perhaps my favorite Tarot card (in the Rider-Waite deck particularly). I still might paint it on a wall in my house, life-size. If one is an Introverted personality type, The Hermit holds immediate significance. To Extraverts, he is 'crazy,' since Extraverts by nature are directed to the outer world, which means materiality and social interaction, and anyone who is inner-directed, who lives in one's thoughts, feeling, visions must be a 'head case.'

My Lady and I are INTPs (by the MBTI) and I have been a Hermit not through choice but because I do not belong to the predominantly extraverted American culture. I have a greater need for friends than she does and unfortunately for me all I have in the world are two childhood friends who I rarely see for the distance between us. Two other childhood friends broke off 40+ years of friendship for reasons unknown to me, I can only surmise. Almost 23 years in Florida and I have never made any close friends. One fellow and his wife call us, but she is purely materialistic (on 'E' she once proclaimed that she was "shallow") and he seems to boast that he never reads. We don't know why they continue to seek us out - they're all about spoiling their young kids, we're introverted and philosophical.

Perhaps after a certain stage of development (high school, college age) friendships become forged from 'practical' dynamics like golfing with one's boss (and allowing him to win), or meeting the parents of the children your kids make 'play dates' with. The days of hanging with guys who are good to hunt chicks with, or the guys who you think are cool to hang with, end. I don't golf (or scuba anymore, or jet ski, etc.), and I have no children. Without toys and games, most males seem like lost children. Hysteria about ball games simply fill the emptiness of an impoverished inner life. Those who see these things as I do are themselves Hermits - whether they want to be or not.


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself

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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #4955586 - 11/19/05 11:57 AM (18 years, 4 months ago)

Carl Jung.... sounds familiar, actually i think im reading a book of his as of late. "Teaching of the golden flower" i think is its title.

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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #4955636 - 11/19/05 12:16 PM (18 years, 4 months ago)

Cool Markos! You always did strike me as a strongly Introverted type :wink:

I'm also an INTP, and from the other INTPs I have talked to (and, really, any INxx types in general) this lack of a need for social interaction seems to be quite common.


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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4955773 - 11/19/05 01:04 PM (18 years, 4 months ago)

eh, i have one close friend that i feel the need to be with.
i get really bored and somewhat depressed when she's not around.
kind of selfish, but meh.

i don't really feel the need to be around anyone else.. mainly because i feel like no one else really gives two shits.

:thumbup:

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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #4955974 - 11/19/05 01:46 PM (18 years, 4 months ago)

Jung wrote a psychological introduction to an ancient Taoist alchemical tract called 'The Secret of the Golden Flower,' translated by Jung's friend Richard Wilhem.


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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4956184 - 11/19/05 02:32 PM (18 years, 4 months ago)

But I actually do need social interaction. Unfortunately, it has to be of the nature of my (our) social needs: deep discussions, preferably in a supportive setting which might include music conducive to such discussion along with other aesthetics (cleanliness, subdued lighting, 'good' incense, interesting art, perhaps a decent yet inexpensive bottle of merlot or cabernet, etc.). Now, in our house we provide these things for ourselves, but we like to bring in others to be on the same (more-or-less) page. This all amounts to a lifestyle that continues the Psychedelic Experience. This is what was always beautiful about a well-constructed setting for a trip, and tripping(synonymously: 'being') with others became the preferred model for social interaction. Now this presents a major problem for us since we are therefore not the Superbowl-party-going types, very very few people who are 50 years old (even though we do not appear to be near that age in real life) are 'psychedelic.' A local Shroomerite used to hang with us, and we had great conversations under the above conditions, but the guy (1) has issues of his own about God (and felt that our dragon-clock and other matching dragon art was sinister), hence (2), we are sinister, so he wrote us a 'Dear John' e-mail and broke off our friendship. Well, the guy is half our age but that was a plus because he was still exploring mind and spirit. Most people stop doing that if they ever did it at all by the time they finish with school, go to work and grow up!

In the early 70s, the stream of time was parted for me by the Lightning Bolt of the Psychedelic Experience. Afterwards I found myself on a tiny island in the stream, living still in the Here & Now with everyone and everything I once knew way way down stream. I look around and do not identify with people my age (not that I ever did) or with hip-hop youth culture. When I see one of my neighbors (probably in a criminal line we suspect) pushing 40, wearing baggies hanging down to reveal boxers, talking on a cell outside from dawn til dusk, I wonder how my jeans and long hair, which not only don't belong to Miami fashion, but to a different era, really appear to people. The Principal in the school where I work feels uncomfortable around me - she is maybe 15 years younger than I am. Trying to make conversation at the beginning of the school year she asked me "Are you ready to rock and roll?" (translation: am I ready to begin the year enthusiastically?). I think of myself primarily in terms of my inner life, with acquiring transcendental knowledge and perspective, but the Principal, like most other people, probably assume that the outer means to me what it means to them. The Principal probably fears that her substance abuse specialist smokes pot while listening to "rock and roll" which is why she isn't comfortable about this old long-hair.

We will never really socialize, although there are some in-school opportunities. I do not join the social committee, and I just begged out of a pot-luck lunch for administrators and counselors. If she (and others) discovered that last night (Friday), my Lady and I enjoyed ourselves watching Professor Bob Brier (my former prof) teach us the history of ancient Egypt on DVD, they really wouldn't understand. An aging hippy they might get, but a grown-up who still loves to learn impractical things like boring old history...for fun??!!! What - you don't watch sit-coms?  :confused:


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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #4956229 - 11/19/05 02:40 PM (18 years, 4 months ago)

It's too bad we didn't live a little closer, Markos. I can certainly dig the atmosphere of incense, music, merlot (I'm a sucker for shiraz, myself), and deep discussion!

If it's any consolation: I don't feel like I fit into my generation any better than you seem to feel about yours :wink:

I dig things like reading and watching documentaries. Learning about things (anything) is the number one drive in my life. I think you know exactly how hard it is to find other people with those kind of interests.

My ex used to tell me she thought I was born ahead of my time, 30-40 years too early. I used to agree with her, but now I expect that even if I was born 40 years later I'd still be in the same predicament. Or if I was born 40 years earlier.


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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4957856 - 11/19/05 10:06 PM (18 years, 4 months ago)

Thanks for the understanding Trendal, and of course, should you decide some winter to defrost in Florida for a bit, you must look us up for a visit. The shiraz is on me!  :wink:

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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #4959936 - 11/20/05 01:30 PM (18 years, 3 months ago)

Good thread. I have been reading it for a while, but didn't want to add just a hum-drum "yeah, me too". So, I will start with "yeah, me too".
My girl and I are (almost) different types. She is 5 yrs younger than me, and is inspired to learn. I feel like I am showing her dimmensions to our world that she has never even  dreamed about.
Let me elaborate, I moved us out to the country with lots of room, good, non-nosey neighbors and no crack dealers and shootings. I am very content here. Though I do wish I (we) had some one to share with, unfortunately, I don't. That's ok with me. I'm usually reading on the internet or watching (rarely watch TV) something educational. But, I sometimes worry about her feeling lonely or out of touch with the world. So, we converse in depth and share and compare each others points of view.
She had her first trip a few weeks ago (oops, a little too strong) she is understanding where my views of the world and on materialism come from. Pretty much what Markos has put so well into words.
Now, we come to the hermit card and the search for personal enlightenment. Most people in the world could give two shits about enlightenment (I guess they're busy making babies and trying to figure out which guy is the father of my baby :rolleyes: , GIVE ME A BREAK, please)
So, we move our conversation forward to the particular chemical of acid (which she has never experienced) She says "I disagree" and gives me such a typical, worldly explanation that acid is not illegal b/c people are affraid of enlightenment and the total destruction of their false reality, but "Acid is illegal b/c it makes people do things they wouldn't normally do" I say "such as" and she says "Freak out and kill people" :lol:
How rediculous. and this is the way society has conditioned misbeliefs. People are irresponsible, and many more people consume alcohol and get behind the wheel and actually do kill people, yet it's still a legal substance.
I'm gonna go right now and collect some evidence that people who use lsd are more content to stay home and experinence or be amongst others that dose and share enlightenment and share the love, while people out drinking are thinking the same thing, but in reality, are doing things they will regret later, and usually end a night throwing punches (which is why I quit).
Just wanted to add our conversation stemming from this thread.
But in support, I usually stay home and find something to expand my knowledge, ponder on things. Especially the ways of the world and what motivates people to do the things they do and the fact that so many people will never get to experience the reality of life for being so stuck in showing their outer selves to the people around them.
Thanks for the good conversation and replys in this thread.

:peace:


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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #4961944 - 11/20/05 09:50 PM (18 years, 3 months ago)

shiraz shiraz what ever will be will be

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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4963724 - 11/21/05 11:41 AM (18 years, 3 months ago)

at least you get invitations.. so there would by far be no problem, unless you make it.. ..be! :smile:

this new-year BTW. I spent all alone at home. having had the plans of having a party here, with my friends, but then they changed their mind on the last second, and I had no car or anything to get where they went..

.. bah.. I had something to say, but forgot, so let that be me feeling sorry for myself in public! :P

I am a hermit! but I wish I had visiting friends.. :smile:

kind of tied of visiting them all the time, I have no car...
But I do got a motorcycle..

so..

in summer I am all social and shit, always anywhere..

but in winter I get all alone..

I feel like a human-bear, hibernating.. :smile:


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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: trendal]
    #4970771 - 11/22/05 10:28 PM (18 years, 3 months ago)

after reading this entire thread i thought i would add my two cents, which may be a very long two cents :sun: like a lot of you i'm the hermit type. i really dont see anything wrong with it, im simply an introvert. i dont feel a need to talk my ass off about nothing. if i dont have anything to add, i dont add anything. i mostly talk when im spoken to, again, unless i have something i feel is worthy of discussion. usually the things most people talk about i could care less about.

it's perfectly ok if you're ok with it but dont expect people who aren't introverts or who arent "tuned in" to understand, you'll most likely be labeled an anti-social looney, which isn't true. like a lot of you, i dont label myself anti social, instead i'd call myself un-social. i would reckon that 100% of this un-social behavior stems from what's around me, specifically the people. this brings me to the post made earlier:
Quote:

Nice thing about forums is you can choose a community of likeminded people and then even further within that choose the topics to discuss. Maybe I just need to convince my friends to visit messageboards more often.



if there were a community made up of likeminded people, such as shroomerites, hermits, etc.. i'd gladly go there. i've been toying around with the idea of a "hermit community" for a while now. it seems that there's many people here and elsewhere who would enjoy the simple life, away from the "normal" bullshit, but i got a feeling that many people would get the impression i was trying to build a cult or something (tried explaining this to my mother, who brought up the cult thing). i know i'm destin to live the simple life, i already plan on having a house in the woods, utilize solar power, grow my own food, etc. i think if there were other people in a bikes distance away who were the same as me, that would be great.. hense the hermit community type thing. i remember seeing a post here about a "shroomery island", kind of the same idea. anyways, i think i got off a tangent there, so to get back on track ill bring up another quote from an earlier post by simisu:

Quote:

don't you want to have wild passionate sex with lot's of fine looking ladys?
don't you wish you could presue your desires outside of fantasy?



no and no. i could care less about the first. i had my share of fun, but to be honest, it wouldnt be the end of my world if i never had sex again. on the second one, for me atleast, i think it's fair to say that hermits are creative. many "hermit" type that i talk to find joy in writing, reading, painting, creating music, anything that generally brings the inner self to the outside world. i'm no exception, i love writing and i try to make my own unique style of music. these two things are kind of hampered by stuff like school, work, and everything else that comes with the "social" thing. if i were a hermit, doing my own thing, i would have all the time in the world to write, or create music. i would have ample inspiration because i would have no bullshit around me to take away from the natural beauty surrounding me. that's one more reason why i would indeed like to move "out there", so i could focus more on bringing my inner self out through art.

Quote:

I dig things like reading and watching documentaries. Learning about things (anything) is the number one drive in my life. I think you know exactly how hard it is to find other people with those kind of interests.




this is true for me too. when i watch tv, its almost exclusively either PBS, Discovery or History. if im eating ill usually watch some crap like mtv or the other stuff just for the hell of it. i tend to see right through it, and laugh at how it portrays people and the stereotypes it reinfoces. actually, its kind of sad, anyways..

lastly, in regards to what filthysock said:
Quote:

So I think its totally cool to be a hermit... but what I'm missing is a hermit friend, someone I can be on the same level with, I dont have that...




a hermit friends a good thing to have. just another reason i thought the community would be a cool thing. it seems the reason a lot of you (myself included) arent that social is because you know most people can't stand silence so when silence comes up, they start blabbing about useless shit.

i guess i should have gave some background info about myself.. up until seventh grade (when i moved cross country), being a hermit or being alone for that matter never crossed my mind. i was out every weekend with girls, i practically had a new one each week. i wouldnt say moving "turned me hermit", if anything it opened my eyes. since then, i began to become an introvert, which i dont think is a bad thing. in my highschool years i started hanging out less and less with my "friends". not because i didnt like them, instead i didnt like what we did as friends. in my senior year, "hanging out" meant driving around with 3 drunk and stoned people, while stoned myself of course. it was boring as fuck, it was annoying as fuck. i felt like i was in a place i shouldnt be, when one "friend" would toss a beer bottle onto the road i would just think to myself "what a fucking idiot, your polluting and someone could run over that glass!". what could i do?

i guess i should wrap this up about now. being a hermits fine, its ultimately your life and you shouldn't let other people influence it. if you want to be a sheep and just "fit in", do that, you'll be in the majority. if thats not your thing, and youd rather spend your time being creative, or simply thinking about shit (which i love to do.. especially deep things like the universe, nature, etc), great do that. theres absolutely nothing wrong with it.

and if ya ever need a hermit pal, maybe one day you could build a place near my hermit house  :grin:

hope that rant/response wasnt toooooo long, but what the hell  :tongue2:

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Offlinekotik
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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: pH_]
    #4971667 - 11/23/05 06:49 AM (18 years, 3 months ago)

heh, best thread ever... ?  anyways, I can really relate to what many of you are saying.

Quote:

I dig things like reading and watching documentaries. Learning about things (anything) is the number one drive in my life. I think you know exactly how hard it is to find other people with those kind of interests.





Quote:

Markos:

An aging hippy they might get, but a grown-up who still loves to learn impractical things like boring old history...for fun??!!! What - you don't watch sit-coms?




heh, well aside from the hip-hop youth, which I guess I am in, since my signature says so, and I even wear baggy clothes... but apart from the way I dress myself, and one type of music I like, this is a great example of how 2 otherwise opposite people really could get along, because of an interest in history and deep discussions, as opposed to talk about the latest sneaker in stores, or the latest video on MTV.  I am 1/2 your age (you said 50?) but I love watching the history channel just as much as you probably... my friends think I am crazy when they catch me watching a 3 hour lecture (without computer animation or techno music to keep those without attention spans interested)

Quote:

Louise:

Most people in the world could give two shits about enlightenment (I guess they're busy making babies and trying to figure out which guy is the father of my baby  , GIVE ME A BREAK, please)

I usually stay home and find something to expand my knowledge, ponder on things. Especially the ways of the world and what motivates people to do the things they do and the fact that so many people will never get to experience the reality of life for being so stuck in showing their outer selves to the people around them.




Quote:

pH_:

i dont feel a need to talk my ass off about nothing. if i dont have anything to add, i dont add anything. i mostly talk when im spoken to, again, unless i have something i feel is worthy of discussion. usually the things most people talk about i could care less about.




:thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup:
couldn't agree more, although we all fall into situations where we are going on and on about shit that no one else cares about... for some people, talking about society may be important.. but then to someone that just came back from the mall wearing brand new name-brand clothes, and a $200 haircut... I mean although you may share some interests... certain topics are just sure-losers.  For example one of my best friends (which is also a roommate) is fun to hang with and talk to sometimes but I feel that 49.99% of the time he is talking about some bullshit I don't care about at all (for instance, the latest ringtones he bought), and 49.99% of the time I am talking about something he doesn't care about (for instance, anything that happened before 1990).  Although we both have the courtesy to pretend we care by arbitrarily nodding heads, or saying monosyllabic things like "cool," "oh yeah?" or my favorite "word?," I can certainly sense a wall emerging...  it's like you come to a certain point where you have already heard all the stories each has to offer.. you think you already know someone's stance/opinion, so it boils down to a situation where neither feels they have anything to offer as meaningful discussion, and at the same time, may feel as though the other has nothing to offer in discussing something you find meaningful.

Quote:

in my senior year, "hanging out" meant driving around with 3 drunk and stoned people, while stoned myself of course. it was boring as fuck, it was annoying as fuck. i felt like i was in a place i shouldnt be, when one "friend" would toss a beer bottle onto the road i would just think to myself "what a fucking idiot, your polluting and someone could run over that glass!".




hah, pretty much describes my last few years in high school as well...  but I have to admit, at the time although I found it mostly pointless, I enjoyed almost every minute of it.  However... no less than 5 years later, I still have friends that get drunk most nights, drive around honking at girls and throwing beer bottles out the window in the freeway...  its like nothing has really changed.  Sometimes I even have to wonder, maybe getting drunk and horny and being destructive SHOULD be as fun as it used to be.. and maybe I'm just becoming a boring person.


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Re: Is it ok to be a hermit, or is something wrong? [Re: LouiseLouise]
    #4972948 - 11/23/05 04:00 PM (18 years, 3 months ago)

Well, acid is the original "red pill" of The Matrix, which awakens people to the trance of shallow cultural values that have they been immersed in. I remember unbelievable stories of all kinds during the late 60s-early 70s in all kinds of publications. My college newspaper printed a story about two guys who wore hair to their waists, arrested for cannabalism. After being handcuffed (in front, not behind their backs) one of the 'cannibals' pulled a phial of liquid LSD from his belt, drank it down and vanished from site while his clothes dropped to the ground! Cool...psychedelic ascension. How about the tripping baby sitter who allegedly diapered a turkey and roasted the baby? Or again, the ever-famous hippies who stared at the sun until they had burned out their retinas and become permanently blind? Let me not forget the permanent chromosome damage that results from LSD, or in a later generation the 'fact' that 5 trips makes one legally 'insane.' Oh, and the spinal fluid thing...

It was the Tate-La Bianca murders by the acid-programmed Mansonoids that will never be forgotten, and that anomaly has been disseminated into the common mentality of the average American mind. It is this cultural anomaly that probably informs your girlfriend about the heinous dangers of LSD. Every year at least 100 persons die from aspirin, but this isn't newsworthy. Like others who used psychedelics wisely, I got a lot smarter off of them, but then, I was not a psychopath to begin with.


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