|
jl87
Shroomer



Registered: 10/20/19
Posts: 42
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
|
Weird, scary shrooms experience
#26553671 - 03/23/20 06:24 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
Hello everyone! Few days ago i decided to have a full immersing experience by taking 5 dried grams alone. It turned out to be really difficult to manage. It started well, but then i begun to oscillate between moments of great euphoria to others of anxiety and fear, which i could barely control by stop thinking negatively and losing myself into music. At a given point i was feeling crazy, like i was in a psychotic state (which i know it can be normal in a trip), but i was scared of that condition or by the possibility of developing a long lasting mental illness. In some moments i managed to calm myself down , but as soon as i started to think again i was finding myself falling in that unstable state of worrying and mental restlessness, time wasn't passing. At another point i danced happily, then i would find myself to feel bad again. So once i decided to get up to change my mental state and i started to feel overwhelmed by really strong emotions and i cried and danced. Overall i was hoping for time to pass and the trip to finish though. I still get this feeling like i have times in which i feel good and others in which i feel bad, and they are similar to the trip. But i feel ok. Anyway, i wasn't prepared to this experience and it was the most intense so far both in terms of feelings and hallucinations. I also had a period of time in which i was feeling like i didn't exist, it's hard to explain; like i wasn't myself anymore, but part of the environment in some way, and that made me scared too. I ask for opinions and suggestions about the trip itself and about doing it again, even if not alone or at the same dosages. A couple of questions in particular : are you really the "driver" of your trip, can you take full control when things seems to go bad? (i kind of did it partially, but maybe i wasn't well prepared and i don't really know if it was just the substance that was making me oscillating without me doing anything during this process). Furthermore, is it possible that the days/weeks after a trip you feel similarly to the trip that you had? Because it seems that really my state of mind after i trip reflects the way i tripped (even when, for example, my trip is really good, i feel really good afterwards). Thank you all for reading and sharing, hope you will find that interesting and give me some nice and passionate feedbacks from your knowledge and experience!
|
The Blind Ass
Bodhi



Registered: 08/16/16
Posts: 26,657
Loc: The Primordial Mind
|
Re: Weird, scary shrooms experience [Re: jl87] 1
#26553793 - 03/23/20 07:16 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
The old axiom that “I am/think/feel/are positive, thus my trip will be” or “I am/think/feel/are negative, thus my trip will be” does not hold up to scrutiny in the light of the swath of humanity’s experiences with psychedelics. Sometimes It has, other times, it has not. There are known reasons for this, but, more unknown to it than known. Abandoning the intellect, or sticking to it, is about all I can control - and the line blurs sometimes while tripping, Because holding onto it when journeying deep into unknown expressions of phenomena can set one up for some very difficult situations.
However, when getting ones toes wet, I find it best to apply logic for as long as it holds, and when it doesn’t, to remain true to the faculty of equanimity and patience, which when done allows for lucidity and simple clarity, which are invaluable in the face of that which is no longer known terrain. Knowing “trips” to be a subset of the phenomena of dreaming helps, because dreams cannot hurt you, and nothing is real. Same goes with a trip, its temporary, like all things, and subject to many of the same laws as dreaming, because they are both of the same nature of experience - ie. Hallucinatory, ie. Not real. < yet being unreal, we can still learn from them, that is their true benefit to our species. The lack of most physical repercussions, but the benefit of enrichment to our own, and our loved ones ordinary lives. Deeper trips simply require practice, and frankly- mostly individuals experimenting with hallucinogenics will abandon in favor of sobriety, or low doses of the drug were they “feel” more in control.
It doesn’t necessarily behave as logic would dictate.
The way mushrooms effect our ordinary mind and the experience of it is much more quantum in nature than what I can say with words.
-------------------- Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps
|
Northerner
splelling chceker


Registered: 07/29/12
Posts: 14,141
Loc: FNQ
Last seen: 39 minutes, 26 seconds
|
Re: Weird, scary shrooms experience [Re: jl87] 3
#26553805 - 03/23/20 07:19 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
Weird and scary is a pretty normal experience for highish doses of mushrooms. You're certainly not alone. You cannot control where the trip is going but you can adjust how you deal with it, and that in turn will steer the course of it. The hardest part of strong tryptamine doses is letting go. If you don't let go you end up in a fight trying to control it, when your control ability is actually really low. This amplifies fear, anxiety, dissonance, derealization and other things like you described here. Then shit starts to smowball. Letting go is often a conscious choice when things get rough. Just accepting whatever is happening and letting yourself fall into it and explore it takes some courage. But once you do accept it you find that it's really not as bad as you thought it was, in fact it's rather interesting, then you'll be wondering what you were scared of.... then the trip changes. It's the same with prevailing headspaces after trips. Resistance and dwelling makes the whole integration more difficult. You have to just suck that stuff up and own it. Whatever it may be. It does get easier the more you do it. But it's always pretty wild. Especially when you start to let yourself drift into territory psychologically that you don't normally go.
--------------------
The nearest we ever come to knowing truth is when we are witness to paradox.
|
LosTresOjos
Humano

Registered: 09/18/18
Posts: 1,347
Loc: Hurling Through Space
Last seen: 2 years, 29 days
|
Re: Weird, scary shrooms experience [Re: Northerner]
#26555295 - 03/24/20 03:13 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
Yeah you gotta learn to let go. Be ok with losing everyone and everything. It's a natural part of life. We don't own anything it's all just being lent out to us. This body will recycle back from where it came. everything is ok at all times regardless of our human perspective.
|
jl87
Shroomer



Registered: 10/20/19
Posts: 42
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
|
|
Thank you, your concepts are very reasonable and i agree with you. Just ine thing: what do you mean with "quantum in nature", are you referring in some way to quantum mechanics?
|
jl87
Shroomer



Registered: 10/20/19
Posts: 42
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
|
Re: Weird, scary shrooms experience [Re: Northerner]
#26560776 - 03/27/20 09:14 AM (3 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Northerner said: Weird and scary is a pretty normal experience for highish doses of mushrooms. You're certainly not alone. You cannot control where the trip is going but you can adjust how you deal with it, and that in turn will steer the course of it. The hardest part of strong tryptamine doses is letting go. If you don't let go you end up in a fight trying to control it, when your control ability is actually really low. This amplifies fear, anxiety, dissonance, derealization and other things like you described here. Then shit starts to smowball. Letting go is often a conscious choice when things get rough. Just accepting whatever is happening and letting yourself fall into it and explore it takes some courage. But once you do accept it you find that it's really not as bad as you thought it was, in fact it's rather interesting, then you'll be wondering what you were scared of.... then the trip changes. It's the same with prevailing headspaces after trips. Resistance and dwelling makes the whole integration more difficult. You have to just suck that stuff up and own it. Whatever it may be. It does get easier the more you do it. But it's always pretty wild. Especially when you start to let yourself drift into territory psychologically that you don't normally go.
Thank you, too. The same, very reasonable and thrutful concepts. I think i will keep using these substances, but starting again with more controllable dosages, like 3.5 g for shrooms. The only thing i'm afraid of is the possibility to develop some severe mental issue, even if i plan to do it every one/two months, without abusing. The thing is : evem if i have done like ten times shrooms, and never had big troubles, there still be a possibility to get some severe mental illness? That's what i should figure out
|
LosTresOjos
Humano

Registered: 09/18/18
Posts: 1,347
Loc: Hurling Through Space
Last seen: 2 years, 29 days
|
Re: Weird, scary shrooms experience [Re: jl87]
#26560777 - 03/27/20 09:15 AM (3 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
We are quantum machines. We would obviously experience quantum mechanics on a daily second by second moment.
|
jl87
Shroomer



Registered: 10/20/19
Posts: 42
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
|
Re: Weird, scary shrooms experience [Re: LosTresOjos] 1
#26560784 - 03/27/20 09:17 AM (3 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
LosTresOjos said: Yeah you gotta learn to let go. Be ok with losing everyone and everything. It's a natural part of life. We don't own anything it's all just being lent out to us. This body will recycle back from where it came. everything is ok at all times regardless of our human perspective.
Sure you're right, appreciate your opinion. But my human perspective it's important to me. I mean, i don't want to go crazy and f*ck up my life. About letting go, clearly we have to, but within the limits of living a beautiful life
|
Psion
Sage
Registered: 09/11/18
Posts: 1,288
Last seen: 3 days, 16 hours
|
Re: Weird, scary shrooms experience [Re: jl87] 1
#26561239 - 03/27/20 01:59 PM (3 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
that feeling of you not existing is you getting a taste of perspective - you sensing that you are just the tiniest mote of the all made one, how each and every living thing is connected to each other. naturally, in the face of sensing such an overwhelmingly large thing, something as small as you temporarily seems to disappear, just like in how zooming out to see the entire universe, your ability to see the earth is lost.
"you" however, do not actually disappear. it's merely your perspective that has changed for a while. you are still perfectly you, in your time, in your space, and eventually you return to it, if changed from your newly gained perspective, similar to how an adventurer may return to an old haunt, but with a new way of looking at it - it may seem a bit smaller than it used to be, or perhaps they gain a new appreciation for it as they see how it relates to the larger world.
as far as controlling your trip, it's like jumping into a powerful river at full spring melt - a new tripper is just going to be carried along and swirled into whatever hidden eddies and currents there are, while an experienced tripper can learn to flow with the current while guiding the trip. you can't exactly "fight the current" very well, but you can nudge it so it takes the smoothest currents and generally goes well. i suppose an incredibly powerful and experienced will might be able to fight the current and control it completely, but it's likely that none of us are the Chosen One.
Edited by Psion (03/27/20 02:00 PM)
|
Northerner
splelling chceker


Registered: 07/29/12
Posts: 14,141
Loc: FNQ
Last seen: 39 minutes, 26 seconds
|
Re: Weird, scary shrooms experience [Re: jl87] 1
#26561265 - 03/27/20 02:17 PM (3 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
jl87 said:
Quote:
Northerner said: Weird and scary is a pretty normal experience for highish doses of mushrooms. You're certainly not alone. You cannot control where the trip is going but you can adjust how you deal with it, and that in turn will steer the course of it. The hardest part of strong tryptamine doses is letting go. If you don't let go you end up in a fight trying to control it, when your control ability is actually really low. This amplifies fear, anxiety, dissonance, derealization and other things like you described here. Then shit starts to smowball. Letting go is often a conscious choice when things get rough. Just accepting whatever is happening and letting yourself fall into it and explore it takes some courage. But once you do accept it you find that it's really not as bad as you thought it was, in fact it's rather interesting, then you'll be wondering what you were scared of.... then the trip changes. It's the same with prevailing headspaces after trips. Resistance and dwelling makes the whole integration more difficult. You have to just suck that stuff up and own it. Whatever it may be. It does get easier the more you do it. But it's always pretty wild. Especially when you start to let yourself drift into territory psychologically that you don't normally go.
Thank you, too. The same, very reasonable and thrutful concepts. I think i will keep using these substances, but starting again with more controllable dosages, like 3.5 g for shrooms. The only thing i'm afraid of is the possibility to develop some severe mental issue, even if i plan to do it every one/two months, without abusing. The thing is : evem if i have done like ten times shrooms, and never had big troubles, there still be a possibility to get some severe mental illness? That's what i should figure out
I've been tripping on and off for 25 years. I'm educated, well traveled, I've got a successful career, family, own my own home, all the trimmings. By society's standards I am successful.
Not to say I haven't pushed it too far a couple of times and got my ass kicked for a couple of months afterwards, (lord knows I've done that a few times) but psychedelics are not narcotics. They are not life destroying substances, they are mind opening substances. They let you know when you are pushing it too far and allow you to change your perspective, grow, heal, regenerate, be a better person. I would not be the person I am today if it was not for them.
Could you get severe mental issues from psychedelics? Sure. That's a risk of life that you have to mitigate with or without them. You're far more likely to get severe mental issues from eating shit food, watching commercial TV and following social media though. That shit is real poison.
Just don't trip too often and you will be perfectly safe. Once a season is very safe, once a month a bit less so, every weekend becomes risky. You can't do that for long. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't for a while. Being self aware is the key.
--------------------
The nearest we ever come to knowing truth is when we are witness to paradox.
|
jl87
Shroomer



Registered: 10/20/19
Posts: 42
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
|
Re: Weird, scary shrooms experience [Re: Psion]
#26561964 - 03/27/20 07:32 PM (3 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Psion said: that feeling of you not existing is you getting a taste of perspective - you sensing that you are just the tiniest mote of the all made one, how each and every living thing is connected to each other. naturally, in the face of sensing such an overwhelmingly large thing, something as small as you temporarily seems to disappear, just like in how zooming out to see the entire universe, your ability to see the earth is lost.
"you" however, do not actually disappear. it's merely your perspective that has changed for a while. you are still perfectly you, in your time, in your space, and eventually you return to it, if changed from your newly gained perspective, similar to how an adventurer may return to an old haunt, but with a new way of looking at it - it may seem a bit smaller than it used to be, or perhaps they gain a new appreciation for it as they see how it relates to the larger world.
as far as controlling your trip, it's like jumping into a powerful river at full spring melt - a new tripper is just going to be carried along and swirled into whatever hidden eddies and currents there are, while an experienced tripper can learn to flow with the current while guiding the trip. you can't exactly "fight the current" very well, but you can nudge it so it takes the smoothest currents and generally goes well. i suppose an incredibly powerful and experienced will might be able to fight the current and control it completely, but it's likely that none of us are the Chosen One. 
I like this perspective, but i still have to learn how to get the most out of such an overwhelming experience. I mean, with lower dosages or, anyway, not so powerful effects, i enjoyed the trip, and i mean even exploring dark places. But when i experience derealization, ego loss and so on, i am just afraid. Next time will be better i guess, and your suggestions are making a big difference 🙏🙏
Edited by jl87 (03/27/20 07:38 PM)
|
jl87
Shroomer



Registered: 10/20/19
Posts: 42
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
|
Re: Weird, scary shrooms experience [Re: Northerner]
#26561978 - 03/27/20 07:36 PM (3 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
There's nothing i want to add or reply in some way. Just exhaustive, sincere and trustful. Thank you!
|
jl87
Shroomer



Registered: 10/20/19
Posts: 42
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
|
Re: Weird, scary shrooms experience [Re: LosTresOjos]
#26561989 - 03/27/20 07:45 PM (3 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
LosTresOjos said: We are quantum machines. We would obviously experience quantum mechanics on a daily second by second moment.
Actually i studied, at an academic level (i.e. not really driven by my own passion, and without being allowed to dig verily deeply in the topic) quantum mechanics, but i can't understad your concept, sorry. Saying that we are quantum machines can mean lots of things as well as nothing. It needs argumentation IMHO. Peace
|
|