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Anonymous #1
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Opioids and Surgery
#26531454 - 03/12/20 05:38 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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I was in an accident and had major surgery. I’m two weeks post op and have spent most of my time trying not to take the prescribed Percocet or Vicodin. I have tramadol as well for less severe pain.
Today I had a post op appointment and part of one of the repaired bones lifted. My recovery isn’t where it should be and my surgeon applauded me on staying off a lot of the painkillers but also said it was time to just take them and be aggressive with trying to heal and asking for help taking care of myself around the house because it’s making it worse. Other people have ended up permanently disabled from the injury and he said grown men usually cannot withstand this pain without the pain killers. He insisted that my discipline and everything would allow for a full recovery but it’s time to take the drugs.
My problem is the opioids are making me very very depressed. I’ve been depressed before and have extensive experience pulling myself out of the hole. But this is different. I can’t talk to my friends about it because I’m afraid it’s going to push them away. They know it’s not a great recovery and I’m in pain but I won’t bring it up further than that. Some of my friends didn’t even check in after surgery and I’ve avoided letting them know how bad it is or reaching out. Because it’s not a logical sad I can’t work myself out of this very sad lonely feeling, and so saying it makes no sense to put that burden on my friends since there’s no way to really solve it.. At night I’m awake and nerve and bone pain has me in a little ball and I want more than anything to be held.
I can’t run, chocolate won’t create a substantial enough serotonin boost, I left my boyfriend due to extenuating abusive behavior and I discovered he was lifting my pain meds even before surgery. But maybe someone has been through this and has some advice I haven’t thought of. I also can’t acquire drugs like mushrooms due to the fact that I’m mostly bedridden/can’t walk far. My ex kept all the jars from my last grow, the 2cb, acid and changa along with the rest of my possessions. So I cant even get away from this reality for short periods or attempt micro dosing.
TLDR: I have a debilitating injury I’m trying to recover from before it becomes permanent- I need to take more opioids but they are making me tremendously sad. Need advice I haven’t heard already. Things that make you happy are also welcome because I need to try anything to get through this.
Thank you in advance, much love.
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Hi, sorry you're going through this but you absolutely should mitigate pain after surgery in an area where your nerves and bone are affected. And it's very important to eat right. The whole idea is to free up energy for healing.
Sounds like you are depressed about life and the meds are making you feel that. Am I reading that right?
Being in constant unmitigated pain can't be cheering you up. It's the loss of control that's the problem. Have you ever had dark moments during a trip? How do you deal with that?
I'd highly suggest at least taking a dose at night and putting on something chill to listen to and just relax. Clear the mind. Use meditative practices. You need sleep. That will help with pain depression and healing.
If you can't sleep watch something that interests you but is chill. I like the blue planet type series.
I know it's hard. But I hope you will find the strength to do what is best for you and come out whole. I know that there's alot more involved in this.
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Free time is the only time
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Also if you want to talk here and say what you don't feel comfortable saying to friends I think that would be good. That's half of what this place is here for.
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Free time is the only time
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Peyote Road
Stranger

Registered: 09/02/15
Posts: 3,527
Loc: Great Lakes State
Last seen: 1 year, 3 months
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Pharmaceutical opioids make me depressed also. I suggest kratom. It's less depressing than opiates and if you don't have much tolerance it might be strong enough.
-------------------- The path of the herbalist is to open ourselves to nature in an innocent and pure way. SHe in turn will open her bounty and reward us with many valuable secrets. May the earth bless you. - Michael Tierra
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Anonymous #1
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Hey, thank you both.
My family came and installed a tv in my room with a Roku etc and it kind of helped distract me a bit. I took them the first week because I was having heart episodes from the pain. I am taking them now more frequently again and it’s just waking up at night feeling suffocated by sadness and loneliness. Which makes me feel weak and childish. I know it’ll end eventually it just exacerbated the feeling of how slow this recovering is going. I know it’s just depleted serotonin from the drugs. I’m having a lot of trouble shaking it which usually I am great at when it comes to handling a less than smooth sailing kind of life.
I would usually meditate every morning and start with yoga.
I didn’t even think of Kratom, I tried it awhile back and threw up with an hour or so of taking it- but it might be time to give it another go. I have a week left of Percocet purgatory and then another three of tramadol. But who knows what symptoms are coming when I come off of it.
Physical Therapy offices are closing from the virus outbreak so I’m on my own at this point to buck up and figure this shit all out.
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Might be how you're dosing it? Capsules and liquid extracts exist. I can't toss and wash myself.
Wherever you are I hope you can still get what you need. You may be able to find therapists willing to do Skype sessions.
Send out some emails?
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Free time is the only time
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