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Near Dylan
Shitpost Artist


Registered: 07/29/15
Posts: 13,929
Last seen: 6 days, 22 hours
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HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS 1
#26518995 - 03/05/20 04:03 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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WHO HAS TIPS FOR HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS OUTSIDE OF WORK AS AN ADULT, FOR INTROVERTS
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Lophosaurus
suruasohpol


Registered: 08/09/07
Posts: 8,744
Loc: CA
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 3
#26519035 - 03/05/20 04:19 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Honestly, you don't seem like a nice person. I am really sorry if I am wrong and misinterpret what you type on here. Be yourself, but also be really nice to people, be fun, stand up straight and be confident. Similar to hitting on women.
Most other people have the same type of feelings you do. They want to make friends too, but don't know how to go about it. Sometimes you can literally just ask them. Something like "Hi, I'm new around here and don't really know anyone, would you be interested in getting a coffee or hitting up a bar?"
Joining clubs or take a class where you are forced to interact with people and then after it's over invite someone to grab a coffee or try to invite yourself to their activities. We have a fire spinning club that my wife and I attend. Lots of friendly like-minded people. Sometimes Shroomery people meet-up with me to do mushroom hikes or meet-ups.
We have another group that gets together late at night and plays bike-polo and street hockey in the empty subway stations. We have another thing called "Side shows" where everybody meets up illegally and they do burn outs, get high, and do drag racing until the cops come.
There used to be a site called like meet-up.com or something and you could join strangers to do art, hike, or anything really.
Invite a neighbor over for dinner.
Take a football or frisbee to the park and throw it to people.
Bring a bong to the park and sit with people to smoke them out. Then give them LSD and let the brainwashing begin.
It's hard when you get older, just remember that other people want friends as much as you do. Good luck!!!
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Crazy_Horse
I’m Rick James, bitch!


Registered: 08/15/16
Posts: 13,283
Loc: Hampsterdam
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 3
#26519042 - 03/05/20 04:21 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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wrestler_az
PsiLLy BiLLy



Registered: 08/11/02
Posts: 13,676
Loc: day dreams of a mad man
Last seen: 10 hours, 1 minute
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 4
#26519043 - 03/05/20 04:21 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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don't. it's not worth it.
-------------------- how's your WOW?
Edited by yageman (04/20/06 4:20 PM)
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larry.fisherman
shoulda died already


Registered: 11/03/12
Posts: 36,294
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 3
#26519052 - 03/05/20 04:27 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Perhaps you could practice your heavy breathing in their PMs
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Shenmue
Dark Lord of the Sith
Registered: 12/21/18
Posts: 2,514
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Walk into your local bar and do this! I promise you'll be cool enough to have tons of friends!
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26519056 - 03/05/20 04:30 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Near Dylan said: WHO HAS TIPS FOR HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS OUTSIDE OF WORK AS AN ADULT, FOR INTROVERTS
If you want to do it like God did it, make one out of clay in your image and then another one from the rib of your creature.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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1234go
Ban Lotto Champion


Registered: 07/08/09
Posts: 53,838
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 3
#26519080 - 03/05/20 04:43 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Don't take for granted what's right in front of you, Dylan. God didn't have anyone to get advice from...he had to literally make his own friends, lol...
Edited by 1234go (03/05/20 04:58 PM)
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Tantrika
Miss Ann Thrope




Registered: 03/26/12
Posts: 17,138
Loc: Lashed to the pyre
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 2
#26519085 - 03/05/20 04:47 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Near Dylan said: WHO HAS TIPS FOR HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS OUTSIDE OF WORK AS AN ADULT, FOR INTROVERTS
check your library bulletin board for a book club with a focus that interests you?
what other potential club hobbies do you have? my mother and step-father meet most of their non-work friends through their hot rod club because he likes to rebuild old cars and Mom is just a classic car fan more generally

dunno, my thought is mostly just occasionally put yourself in places where you can potentially meet like-minded individuals then build a rapport with them over time until you are meeting outside of club times like dating, but without the focus of getting them into bed at the end
now that Terby has passed

but if seeking to make connections, would prolly take a Tarot refresher course or some other workshops in divination at the Magic Shop
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Kwyjibo
Stranger

Registered: 07/31/18
Posts: 1,261
Loc: California
Last seen: 42 minutes, 6 seconds
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26519145 - 03/05/20 05:22 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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I've never had much trouble making friends although I'm not sure how since I'm a bit of an asshole. If you're desperate, I'll be at the harbor in SB for work tomorrow and my friendship can be bought with a cheeseburger.
Edited by Kwyjibo (03/05/20 05:29 PM)
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psi
TOAST N' JAM


Registered: 09/05/99
Posts: 31,456
Loc: 613
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26519163 - 03/05/20 05:28 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Honestly my only active real-life friendships these days are relatives, though not all blood relatives. I have three sisters who are married and all their husbands are pretty cool, though one of them I'm closer with than the others.
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Psicomb



Registered: 01/13/18
Posts: 4,635
Loc: the womb
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 1
#26519198 - 03/05/20 05:47 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Go to shows or something and find people to play music with, you play music right? I feel like just having a couple people to spend quality time with is all I need, ymmv though
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When we constantly pull things apart trying to see how it works, we may end up with only an understanding of how to destroy something - nick sand
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pirate-blues



Registered: 10/15/12
Posts: 13,655
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: psi] 1
#26519206 - 03/05/20 05:49 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Find an extrovert who will adopt you.
Maybe start by joining a casual beer/sports league, pick up a new hobby that's somewhat social and has potential to grow your circle of people - like climbing at a rock gym. You could also check something like meetup for like hiking groups, or whatever you're into. That seems like it can be hit or miss, but you'll get out at least and find new people.
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Near Dylan
Shitpost Artist


Registered: 07/29/15
Posts: 13,929
Last seen: 6 days, 22 hours
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Psicomb] 2
#26519208 - 03/05/20 05:50 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Crowded places make me really claustrophobic and uncomfortable lol. just goin to a bar makes me wanna throw up, I definitely cant go to a show I'd have hella panic attack. I dont really play music anyway I just play guitar every once in a while.
I always put too much reliance on romantic relationships for 100% of my social needs and I never really tried makin friends. Was always an accident just by being with them at school and shit. But now Im adult and work with old people, dont like crowded places. No idea how one goes about makin friends at this stage in life lol.
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Fiery
Sword of Fire


Registered: 12/24/12
Posts: 36,574
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26519227 - 03/05/20 06:00 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Talk to them, and take no for an answer
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1234go
Ban Lotto Champion


Registered: 07/08/09
Posts: 53,838
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 2
#26519229 - 03/05/20 06:01 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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These threads are a combination of trolling, and trying to get actual real life advice....aren't they? I notice you're intentionally leaving out words that you don't usually seem to have a problem with.
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psi
TOAST N' JAM


Registered: 09/05/99
Posts: 31,456
Loc: 613
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26519240 - 03/05/20 06:05 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Yeah I generally hate bars and crowds too. Though I find it much easier to play music with people than have a conversation. That's what's cool with Irish music, the sessions are more of a social activity than a performance. Though there is a shit ton of passive aggression or outright hostility if you suck and try to join in with higher level players. Don't really get a chance to go out to sessions at pubs any more but I'd like to get back into it.
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theRealrollforever
I DID-DENT



Registered: 08/31/13
Posts: 12,736
Loc: Bada-Bing!
Last seen: 2 days, 2 hours
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: psi] 2
#26519278 - 03/05/20 06:25 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Just be super genuine and expose yourself as an actual human with insecurities, emotions, etc to people (within reason.). Don’t just dump on people but when you meet someone cool be real with them and you’d be surprised how much you can relate to a stranger
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sunshine said: The order has to be secret and no one is sure.
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Fiery
Sword of Fire


Registered: 12/24/12
Posts: 36,574
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Quote:
theRealrollforever said: Just be super genuine and expose yourself as an actual human with insecurities,
The royal fox with cheese you might be on to something here.
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Kronikism
Mixing paint


Registered: 09/04/19
Posts: 135
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Fiery]
#26519322 - 03/05/20 06:41 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Whenever I go to a concert or 420 event I always leave with so many numbers I don't end up calling half of em, although most ppl I meet at those places don't end up being long term homies,just people I run into sometimes
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Fiery
Sword of Fire


Registered: 12/24/12
Posts: 36,574
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Kronikism]
#26519332 - 03/05/20 06:44 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Kronikism said: Whenever I go to a concert or 420 event I always leave with so many numbers I don't end up calling half of em, although most ppl I meet at those places don't end up being long term homies,just people I run into sometimes
O rly?> 
smoke free
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Near Dylan
Shitpost Artist


Registered: 07/29/15
Posts: 13,929
Last seen: 6 days, 22 hours
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: 1234go]
#26519335 - 03/05/20 06:45 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
1234go said: These threads are a combination of trolling, and trying to get actual real life advice....aren't they? I notice you're intentionally leaving out words that you don't usually seem to have a problem with.
The world has lots of nuance
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feevers


Registered: 12/28/10
Posts: 8,546
Loc:
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26519359 - 03/05/20 06:59 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Throughout my adult life I've found that the number of "friends" I have is directly proportional to the amount of drugs I have.
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watermelon mon
Willow Trees


Registered: 04/05/13
Posts: 7,800
Last seen: 3 years, 3 months
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: feevers] 4
#26519405 - 03/05/20 07:19 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Near Dylan I'll be your friend. For life.
I stopped by some kind of a hipster bar last night. Just to have a late night drink. I dont like to say this , I'm not suer if I could be friends with many of the people there. The bar tender was super cool.
Everybody was alright it was just a super wierd vibe to me. I'm not sure if they would make good friends. It gave me a gut feeling and they seemed a bit sneaky.
The only friends I have all come from far away. It's a completley different culture / world where they're from. For some reason I click well , with all of them. I didnt have any friends until I met them.
I had some friends from here before. But they just wanted to use me so I would drive them around. It was mostly chicks they were pretty catty. When they didnt need a ride they wanted to make sure I knew that they were all out haveing a good time. That I wasnt welcomed. It was weird.
I'm going to check out a small concert tomorrow night and I'm a bit concerned about it. I always just stand alone. Never talk to anyone. Used to go see shows every weeknd. Just found out where they are again.
I come on here to write a bit. Most of the time I'll only speak when I'm spoken to.
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Fiery
Sword of Fire


Registered: 12/24/12
Posts: 36,574
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I am friends with you
I completely get the distance thing.
A long time ago, people never were able to talk to anyone
I cherish the moments we can talk .
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tyrannicalrex
Strange R



Registered: 04/24/03
Posts: 38,323
Loc: subtropics
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 3
#26519476 - 03/05/20 07:54 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Hmmm, I had no idea about this side of you! This explains the posts mostly (I apologize if this seems like a shot at you, it isn't). You say you work with "old people". Older people have a lot of experience and knowledge to share. I suggest going to get a coffee with one or some of them. Ask questions about meeting people. Some vulnerability is an asset in socializing. I find it very odd when I hear of someone who has panic attacks in public places.
Of course I have always craved crowds and people and social situations so it's easier for me in that respect. Try to listen a lot and only interject when it's time. Bars are a great place to meet friends, especially if you play pool. A pool hall might be less crowded, more room there too. You don't have to drink but a beer or 2 is good to break the ice. It's a good place to meet and make friends because you can ask people to play a game of pool.
The other ideas above like social book clubs etc...are good ideas as well. The more you get out there and the more you do, the less you should feel anxious and have panic attacks. You're fairly intelligent it seems.
https://www.helpguide.org/articles/anxiety/phobias-and-irrational-fears.htm
It's also a plus that you're reaching out in here, it shows progress and wanting to get over the things you have recognized as a hindrance.
Edited by tyrannicalrex (03/05/20 08:05 PM)
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Fiery
Sword of Fire


Registered: 12/24/12
Posts: 36,574
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Quote:
tyrannicalrex said: Hmmm, I had no idea about this side of you! This explains the posts mostly (I apologize if this seems like a shot at you, it isn't). You say you work with "old people". Older people have a lot of experience and knowledge to share. I suggest going to get a coffee with one or some of them. Ask questions about meeting people. Some vulnerability is an asset in socializing. I find it very odd when I hear of someone who has panic attacks in public places.
Of course I have always craved crowds and people and social situations so it's easier for me in that respect. Try to listen a lot and only interject when it's time. Bars are a great place to meet friends, especially if you play pool. A pool hall might be less crowded, more room there too. You don't have to drink but a beer or 2 is good to break the ice. It's a good place to meet and make friends because you can ask people to play a game of pool.
The other ideas above like social book clubs etc...are good ideas as well. The more you get out there and the more you do, the less you should feel anxious and have panic attacks. You're fairly intelligent it seems.
https://www.helpguide.org/articles/anxiety/phobias-and-irrational-fears.htm
It's also a plus that you're reaching out in here, it shows progress and wanting to get over the things you have recognized as a hindrance.
WIDE RIGHT and lovw trooo.
Oigibuitaliyt $2 23ew we47hhdhsd '''
Money never carees the ooor are
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tyrannicalrex
Strange R



Registered: 04/24/03
Posts: 38,323
Loc: subtropics
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Fiery]
#26519520 - 03/05/20 08:15 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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I know you're capable of making that a coherent post, please decipher it.
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spirit_shadow
Feature not a bug



Registered: 08/15/11
Posts: 25,665
Last seen: 1 hour, 12 minutes
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I HATE new friends because I never want them. I like solitude and to be left alone....but that being said it seems wherever I go that involves me working with other people they always become friends and I dont even try. Maybe I'm too nice :/ so yeah, I suggest doing anything that involves working with others if you want to make friends.
Good luck soldier
-------------------- ERROR 418 IM A TEAPOT.....(this account is automated, all posts related to illegal activities or advice thereof are strictly from numerous online sites and are for informational purposes only)- Circa 2011 Ban lotto
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Sockadin



Registered: 01/03/10
Posts: 7,244
Last seen: 2 months, 20 days
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Alcohol
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LikeMyc
Microscopicologist


Registered: 12/06/19
Posts: 1,086
Last seen: 3 years, 3 months
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Sockadin] 1
#26519625 - 03/05/20 09:06 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Share an experience.
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Psicomb



Registered: 01/13/18
Posts: 4,635
Loc: the womb
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: LikeMyc]
#26519692 - 03/05/20 09:50 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Cigarettes make friends too
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When we constantly pull things apart trying to see how it works, we may end up with only an understanding of how to destroy something - nick sand
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TaliesenW
Welder


Registered: 01/27/20
Posts: 150
Last seen: 3 years, 10 months
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Psicomb] 1
#26519765 - 03/05/20 10:52 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Smoke weed
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RJ Tubs 202


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,014
Loc: USA
Last seen: 5 hours, 6 minutes
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26519827 - 03/06/20 12:17 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Near Dylan said:
I always put too much reliance on romantic relationships for 100% of my social needs and I never really tried makin friends.
Seeking romantic love is an egotistical endeavor.
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Dilsnique
Admiral Admirable


Registered: 04/22/14
Posts: 3,800
Loc: Netherworld
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
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The best way to find something is to stop looking for it...
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tyrannicalrex
Strange R



Registered: 04/24/03
Posts: 38,323
Loc: subtropics
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Dilsnique]
#26520190 - 03/06/20 08:23 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Dilsnique said: The best way to find something is to stop looking for it...

You know, the night I exclaimed in my car on the way home from a bar (ha, that rhymed) that I give up and fuck all this looking shit etc...I met my mate/husband a couple of months later.
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LogicaL Chaos
Ascension Energy & Alien UFOs




Registered: 05/12/07
Posts: 69,332
Loc: The Inexpressible...
Last seen: 12 minutes, 38 seconds
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 1
#26521188 - 03/06/20 07:14 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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What about social video gamez like Second Life, Runescape or World of Warcraft?
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Ime everyone likes talking about themselves. Even if they don't think they do.
If you listen they will come.
Seriously being a good listener is probably the easiest way to make friends. It's more than half of what people want from a friend and the good ones reciprocate.
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Free time is the only time
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LogicaL Chaos
Ascension Energy & Alien UFOs




Registered: 05/12/07
Posts: 69,332
Loc: The Inexpressible...
Last seen: 12 minutes, 38 seconds
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Very true! I find a lot of people just wanna talk and since i can be on more of the quiet spectrum, it works out pretty well. I find talkative people bring out more of the extroverted side of me.
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SpiritualSnorkel
Registered: 06/18/06
Posts: 1,545
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Talking is exhausting, listening is easy.
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psi
TOAST N' JAM


Registered: 09/05/99
Posts: 31,456
Loc: 613
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Quote:
CookieCrumbs said: Ime everyone likes talking about themselves. Even if they don't think they do.
If you listen they will come.
Seriously being a good listener is probably the easiest way to make friends. It's more than half of what people want from a friend and the good ones reciprocate.
This was always my problem socially when I was younger, if prompted I would answer questions about myself but I would not clue in that I was also supposed to be giving the other person that kind of in.
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Near Dylan
Shitpost Artist


Registered: 07/29/15
Posts: 13,929
Last seen: 6 days, 22 hours
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: psi]
#26521932 - 03/07/20 09:36 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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I have the opposite in that I cant think of anything to say about myself and feel like they'll be judgin me lol. I feel like I bombard new people with 'get to know you' questions and it feels like an interview
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feldman114
Stragler


Registered: 09/06/19
Posts: 3,365
Loc: Bravos
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: psi]
#26521934 - 03/07/20 09:37 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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If you were really an introvert, you wouldn’t be looking for people to be around You’d just wallow in your loneliness, forever
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Near Dylan
Shitpost Artist


Registered: 07/29/15
Posts: 13,929
Last seen: 6 days, 22 hours
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: feldman114]
#26521940 - 03/07/20 09:41 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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I dont necessarily enjoy social interactions much at all but if you have no one to hang out with where you live, that'll just drive you insane.
I have trouble makin connections with people that arent romantic. I feel as tho every time I try to make friends it just ends up with me flirting with every girl that I meet and then dumping my emotional baggage on her as soon as she seems remotely comfortable lol. When I try to meet people, or look on instagram to see people in my area that I can maybe try to contact, it's just always me keeping an eye out for females and who I am attracted to, and just ignoring all the males entirely. I guess the overwhelming majority of my social life since I was like 14 was just with girlfriends and I would always get too invested so I never really developed good friendships. My confidence with women is unrealisitcally high but the last thing I need right now is that. My confidence with potential bros is zero.
I feel like I got female energy, dawg. Would explain a lot of my past lol
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 1
#26521989 - 03/07/20 10:11 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Near Dylan said: I dont necessarily enjoy social interactions much at all but if you have no one to hang out with where you live, that'll just drive you insane.
That makes for an interesting opening line to a complete stranger at the bus stop.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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Psicomb



Registered: 01/13/18
Posts: 4,635
Loc: the womb
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Asante]
#26521999 - 03/07/20 10:15 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Asante said:
Quote:
Near Dylan said: I dont necessarily enjoy social interactions much at all but if you have no one to hang out with where you live, that'll just drive you insane.
That makes for an interesting opening line to a complete stranger at the bus stop.
Couldn't agree more.
--------------------
When we constantly pull things apart trying to see how it works, we may end up with only an understanding of how to destroy something - nick sand
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 1
#26522074 - 03/07/20 11:17 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Near Dylan said: I have the opposite in that I cant think of anything to say about myself and feel like they'll be judgin me lol. I feel like I bombard new people with 'get to know you' questions and it feels like an interview
Ask one question, then ask a follow up question about that or their answer or make a point about that topic.
Then when the topic reasonably exhausts itself then you can move on to the next thing.
Also, this is something I seriously struggle with (and people called me a good listener before), but you can ask a question without asking a question. "man I love tacos." Prompts them to follow up with "I love tacos too." and then you follow up with "what's your favorite taco place?"
Conversation has a natural flow. I like the pub because, aside from trolling, grems, and shitposting, there always seems to be a natural flowing conversation in most of these threads. As you would expect among friends or at least people who are friendly with one another.
Quote:
Near Dylan said: I dont necessarily enjoy social interactions much at all but if you have no one to hang out with where you live, that'll just drive you insane.
I have trouble makin connections with people that arent romantic. I feel as tho every time I try to make friends it just ends up with me flirting with every girl that I meet and then dumping my emotional baggage on her as soon as she seems remotely comfortable lol. When I try to meet people, or look on instagram to see people in my area that I can maybe try to contact, it's just always me keeping an eye out for females and who I am attracted to, and just ignoring all the males entirely. I guess the overwhelming majority of my social life since I was like 14 was just with girlfriends and I would always get too invested so I never really developed good friendships. My confidence with women is unrealisitcally high but the last thing I need right now is that. My confidence with potential bros is zero.
I feel like I got female energy, dawg. Would explain a lot of my past lol
This is an extremely common phenomena among men and, on behalf of women everywhere, thank you for trying to address it. Alot of guys have a hard time making connections with just friends and place all their social needs on women they want to date or are dating. It's exhausting and it builds unnecessary strain on a relationship. Which I'm sure you've come to realize based on your posts.
Even if you join a sports team or a church or something and have no interaction with those people outside of that setting it's miles better than having no social life outside of her. And sometimes, for an introvert, that's all you really need anyway.
I've come to realize that having too many eggs in one basket, too much of my life limited to one person, is bad as well. It doesn't matter how much you like or love them and they you, you need to have a life outside of them. At the very least you become boring. I've seen it in older men who haven't had a meaningful relationship outside of their spouse in 20+ years. Even if they're terribly interesting people they're not sharing their interests anywhere which makes it repetitive or isolated and self confined. And sadly enough often makes them less interested too.
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Free time is the only time
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remake


Registered: 01/05/16
Posts: 4,178
Loc: South Africa
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26522081 - 03/07/20 11:25 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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If you wanna make friends be open and make people feel comfortable. Don't take your own judgements as facts, and let the other person be himself or herself.
Don't act as if you are trying to enter their personal life in some weird emotional way. Just my opinion. Some people like cult like friend groups though.
Also, don't just take from other people, let it be more a shared experience of give/take equally.
Edited by remake (03/07/20 11:32 AM)
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Tripsurfer
Bring Back Asante!



Registered: 08/01/12
Posts: 7,129
Loc: West of Windward
Last seen: 3 months, 27 days
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26522162 - 03/07/20 12:33 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Near Dylan said: WHO HAS TIPS FOR HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS OUTSIDE OF WORK AS AN ADULT, FOR INTROVERTS
You could start by hitting that Caps Lock button again
Find activities that lets you mingle with other people, like doing yoga at a studio or something similar. Sport are great for these kind of things
I surf and have met a lot of people in the water, and quite a few are now friends
-------------------- Ach en wee ben ik de klos, met mijn boog schoot ik een albatros... A philosopher is a person who knows less and less about more and more, until he knows nothing about everything.

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azzbo

Registered: 07/14/15
Posts: 1,311
Loc:
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 1
#26522217 - 03/07/20 01:04 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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I had to stop being a loner because it became really depressing after awhile. I find the best way to make new friends is to just walk up to a group of lads who are smoking weed and just be like "YOOOOO gimme somme of that bud man". Before you know it, you'll be at some random dudes house blazing weed and watching rick and morty.
Probably a good idea to have a good weed tolerence, otherwise you'll just be baked af whilst getting panic attacks around people you don't know, which is never good.
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Amanita86
OTD Keymaster


Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: azzbo]
#26522221 - 03/07/20 01:09 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
azzbo said: Probably a good idea to have a good weed tolerence, otherwise you'll just be baked af whilst getting panic attacks around people you don't know, which is never good.
Quote:
twighead said:

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Orange clock, pencil "They threw me off the hay truck about noon..."
*Mark 15:34  Gam zeh ya’avor...
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TaliesenW
Welder


Registered: 01/27/20
Posts: 150
Last seen: 3 years, 10 months
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Amanita86]
#26522227 - 03/07/20 01:14 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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i shoould allow them to be within my privacy and not break the rules to the voices
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watermelon mon
Willow Trees


Registered: 04/05/13
Posts: 7,800
Last seen: 3 years, 3 months
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: TaliesenW]
#26522241 - 03/07/20 01:23 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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May we all please be friends : (
: )
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Near Dylan
Shitpost Artist


Registered: 07/29/15
Posts: 13,929
Last seen: 6 days, 22 hours
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I think a big part of the problem is that I maybe am subconsciously attaching too much, or a different kind, of meaning to relationships with people. Like if youre close to somebody that means you have romantic feeings for them, so I dont wanna start hanging out a lot with a guy or opening up cuz I feel like he'll think Im bein gay or somethin lol. I think I just got so used to having relationships be where I got all my "real" connections, that I feel like making a connection with anyone has to also involve having 'feelings' for them. Idk I never thought about it but maybe that might be how Im approaching things without really noticing it.
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watermelon mon
Willow Trees


Registered: 04/05/13
Posts: 7,800
Last seen: 3 years, 3 months
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 2
#26522245 - 03/07/20 01:27 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Things always work out better for me
When I stay out of my head
Life is way to short man
I'm trying to teach myself this
It's getting better with time.
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Near Dylan
Shitpost Artist


Registered: 07/29/15
Posts: 13,929
Last seen: 6 days, 22 hours
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You always know the right thing to say, mon.
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watermelon mon
Willow Trees


Registered: 04/05/13
Posts: 7,800
Last seen: 3 years, 3 months
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26522261 - 03/07/20 01:40 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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I'm just some stupid dummy : (
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Amanita86
OTD Keymaster


Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 2
#26522299 - 03/07/20 02:14 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Dude, just don’t make it weird. When you’re walking you aren’t analyzing every step and what if this or what if that you just walk. Just hang out, if someone says no they say no, if you do something dumb try not to do it again or just say fuck it and do it anyways if it’s what you want to do.
Little 2 year olds know how to play, not because they’ve put massive amounts of analytical thought into it, they just do it, whatever ‘it’ is. Just be safe, don’t end up in sketchy spots and you’ll be fine.
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Orange clock, pencil "They threw me off the hay truck about noon..."
*Mark 15:34  Gam zeh ya’avor...
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Near Dylan
Shitpost Artist


Registered: 07/29/15
Posts: 13,929
Last seen: 6 days, 22 hours
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Well my dumbass goes out to get on the town and see about bein social and makin friends, keein in mind what we talked bout. But I still approached female I thought was cute lollll. She was reading book with a cool cover, it was persian poetry book lol. She was indian and from austrlia, actually had a good conversation and got her contact info but I obv had it in the back of my mind that I was attracted to her and was all 'oooo what if she likes me what if she gonna ask me out' and shit lolol. So im kinda still at square one with that aspect of it but I got out there, dawg.
Females just seem like theyre way more approachable. Guys always look like they got somewhere to be. And theyre ugly!
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Mandarinfish

Registered: 01/27/15
Posts: 1,365
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26522656 - 03/07/20 06:37 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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.
Edited by Mandarinfish (07/23/20 04:18 PM)
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Near Dylan
Shitpost Artist


Registered: 07/29/15
Posts: 13,929
Last seen: 6 days, 22 hours
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Honestly. You're just part of a community, of people your age experiencing similar shit ya kno. It's inevitable to make friends and enemies and relationships and it's this super easy dynamic but, it's meant to be kinda. It's training wheels for the real world, but the real world aint a little community of people like you, it's just a clusterfuck pile of bodies. Hard to make any sense of it. I could understand it being pretty simple if you still are near where you grew up and have friends from high school/college obviously, or if you work with people in your age range. Make friends with a co-worker or two, meet some of their friends, some of their friends, boom. Got yourself a circle now. But if you work with people not in your age range and that you dont really like, or work alone or at home maybe, it definitely isnt that easy. Kinda gotta make an effort to meet people.
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Fiery
Sword of Fire


Registered: 12/24/12
Posts: 36,574
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26522883 - 03/07/20 08:53 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Get a job where you work with a lot of people.
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no_one
Stranger


Registered: 04/07/17
Posts: 648
Last seen: 1 year, 11 months
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 2
#26523091 - 03/07/20 11:20 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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If you're still having difficulties making friends, you could use this website to rent a friend.
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trees


Registered: 02/08/09
Posts: 9,194
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: no_one] 2
#26523471 - 03/08/20 07:31 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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I think the only real way to make real friends is to bond over some subject matter or activity that you value or something.
Like, I was at this park all by myself alone working on amd testing my motorbike in the open fields, and super randomly some other guy in this truck pulls in I'm like wtf this ain't suppose to happen. But he gets out and starts flying these drones. And then we're talking for like 1 hour about drones and how I can machine drone parts and how he can film cool stuff with his drones, and we start talking random stuff and then we smoke something and he's like, yo take my business card man, let me know if you need help with filming rides, we could grab a drink and talk machining, and I was like yeah man fosho fosho!
I never hit him up, but he was all set on a potential friendship, and I could have been too, but I'm super antisocial nowadays when it comes to it.
Samething all throughout my life, all my old friends were gained through weed. That's common these days, but true friendship came out of me just walking up to people and asking them if they wanna help me smoke a joint
I once became a BF for a girl who I ran up to and asked her for a cigarette and we kept talking right there aboit our surroundings until numbers were exchanged and experiences were had.
That's my friend formula for this thread.
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trees


Registered: 02/08/09
Posts: 9,194
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: azzbo]
#26523494 - 03/08/20 07:50 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
azzbo said: I had to stop being a loner because it became really depressing after awhile. I find the best way to make new friends is to just walk up to a group of lads who are smoking weed and just be like "YOOOOO gimme somme of that bud man". Before you know it, you'll be at some random dudes house blazing weed and watching rick and morty.
Probably a good idea to have a good weed tolerence, otherwise you'll just be baked af whilst getting panic attacks around people you don't know, which is never good.
This is the way
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Ryzo



Registered: 12/25/18
Posts: 203
Loc: United States
Last seen: 9 months, 27 days
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26523652 - 03/08/20 09:41 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Near Dylan said: WHO HAS TIPS FOR HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS OUTSIDE OF WORK AS AN ADULT, FOR INTROVERTS
Say with me
C A S H
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Psicomb



Registered: 01/13/18
Posts: 4,635
Loc: the womb
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: trees] 1
#26523669 - 03/08/20 09:51 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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It is true, it works. Trees and I became friends over a few bowl packs!
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When we constantly pull things apart trying to see how it works, we may end up with only an understanding of how to destroy something - nick sand
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Near Dylan
Shitpost Artist


Registered: 07/29/15
Posts: 13,929
Last seen: 6 days, 22 hours
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26523852 - 03/08/20 12:14 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Gonna go to art show
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PatrickKn


Registered: 07/10/11
Posts: 20,562
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 3
#26523877 - 03/08/20 12:33 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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That's not how to make friends.
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Near Dylan
Shitpost Artist


Registered: 07/29/15
Posts: 13,929
Last seen: 6 days, 22 hours
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: PatrickKn]
#26523881 - 03/08/20 12:37 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Gonna talk to people bitch fuck
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theRealrollforever
I DID-DENT



Registered: 08/31/13
Posts: 12,736
Loc: Bada-Bing!
Last seen: 2 days, 2 hours
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26523949 - 03/08/20 01:26 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Art shows are dope!
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sunshine said: The order has to be secret and no one is sure.
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Psicomb



Registered: 01/13/18
Posts: 4,635
Loc: the womb
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26523951 - 03/08/20 01:27 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Dont just flirt with chicks there, slick dick
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When we constantly pull things apart trying to see how it works, we may end up with only an understanding of how to destroy something - nick sand
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Near Dylan
Shitpost Artist


Registered: 07/29/15
Posts: 13,929
Last seen: 6 days, 22 hours
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Psicomb]
#26524189 - 03/08/20 04:04 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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It's not necessarily that I flirt as much as it is just that I have a hard time approaching people Im not attracted to. If that makes any sense
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Mneeb
Stranger


Registered: 12/13/18
Posts: 150
Loc: The dome
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan]
#26524206 - 03/08/20 04:17 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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A few years ago I was getting sick as fuck of trying to find a girl in person.. I knew everyone in town and usually everyone was an asshole or bitch. I met my girlfriend of now 4 years on an app called okcupid. Best decision of my life and the happiest relationship I can imagine. I'd reccomend online dating just be careful not to get catfished. The first girl I met up with was like 400 pounds so i left fuck that. Video chat first. Found another girl shortly after and We decided to meet in a preserve at around 4PM our first date and hit it off so well we walked for 10 minutes decided to sit in a beautiful field and chatted till 3am under the stars and I ended up getting a blowjob and i wasn't even trying to initiate it. Still together today happier than ever though girlfriends are expensive.
-------------------- I'm lying about everything I say. All photos posted were stolen from other sources.
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LogicaL Chaos
Ascension Energy & Alien UFOs




Registered: 05/12/07
Posts: 69,332
Loc: The Inexpressible...
Last seen: 12 minutes, 38 seconds
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Ryzo]
#26524251 - 03/08/20 04:41 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Ryzo said:
Quote:
Near Dylan said: WHO HAS TIPS FOR HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS OUTSIDE OF WORK AS AN ADULT, FOR INTROVERTS
Say with me
C A S H
Time for Near Dylan to join the Illuminati and make some friends with The Enlightened Ones 
https://www.illuminatiofficial.org/
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Mandarinfish

Registered: 01/27/15
Posts: 1,365
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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.
Edited by Mandarinfish (07/23/20 04:18 PM)
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psi
TOAST N' JAM


Registered: 09/05/99
Posts: 31,456
Loc: 613
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Shit that's pretty dire. Maybe there are some people from the site who live in your area and would be up for hanging out?
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larry.fisherman
shoulda died already


Registered: 11/03/12
Posts: 36,294
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Quote:
LogicaL Chaos said:
Quote:
Ryzo said:
Quote:
Near Dylan said: WHO HAS TIPS FOR HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS OUTSIDE OF WORK AS AN ADULT, FOR INTROVERTS
Say with me
C A S H
Time for Near Dylan to join the Illuminati and make some friends with The Enlightened Ones 
https://www.illuminatiofficial.org/
Where did you find that site? Any info on it? It looks so legit, it's secure and they're licensed for major credit cards. That is one hella legit website but I don't know what to believe. There's no doctrine out there really, it's pretty mysterious. I wanna say it's legit and the claims are honest but then we have stuff like a 2000 year old manuscript that says the mark of the eternal-torture-diety is a triangle so
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS [Re: Near Dylan] 1
#26524781 - 03/08/20 11:13 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Near Dylan said: Gonna go to art show
Gives you something to talk about even if you don't make any friends there.
You have identified the problem with your mindset (prior page) and that's more than halfway to fixing it. Stay positive.
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Free time is the only time
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tyrannicalrex
Strange R



Registered: 04/24/03
Posts: 38,323
Loc: subtropics
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Quote:
CookieCrumbs said:
Quote:
Near Dylan said: Gonna go to art show
Gives you something to talk about even if you don't make any friends there.
You have identified the problem with your mindset (prior page) and that's more than halfway to fixing it. Stay positive.
CC! Solid advice and great posts! Yeah ND, the art show is a GREAT start to socializing/getting out and doing things.
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theRealrollforever
I DID-DENT



Registered: 08/31/13
Posts: 12,736
Loc: Bada-Bing!
Last seen: 2 days, 2 hours
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I have to make sure I bring very little money to art shows, I almost always wanna buy someone’s whole display
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sunshine said: The order has to be secret and no one is sure.
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