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badger13
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psychosis
#26502735 - 02/25/20 08:10 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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the more i read the more i see reports of psychosis....so how many of you experienced this? curious as to how long it takes to go away and if you were able to trip safely again at some point???
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yoosername
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I have a psychosis from an incident where I was exposed to mercury. It's permanent, I'll never be able to trip again.
It will vary case to case, however. For example; someone who has an underlying psychosis that is triggered by drug use, my find that their condition gets progressively worse after using, whereas someone healthy experiencing a bad trip (which some consider a psychosis), would be able to come down and try again later without much risk.
-------------------- O son of Kunti, I am the taste of water, the light of the sun and the moon, the syllable om in the Vedic mantras; I am the sound in ether and ability in man.
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ninja cat 09
A paranoid android



Registered: 10/11/09
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Loc: Mexico
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Sucks that that happened yoosername 
I've heard of cases of people going mad from a single trip, Hamilton Morris's best friend apparently had that happen to him. But I've also tripped many times without issue (other than a bad trip here and there) and I have mental illness in my family. Granted, it was foolish to do it as young as I did (under 18), but it turned out fine.
If you're really worried and have a family history with this type of stuff, I suggest you wait until mid to late twenties, where the probabilities of a mental illness of this type to surging drop off and trip then if I haven't developed anything. If you're younger than that it sounds like a long time, but it's not that long to wait.
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Korean Jesus



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I used to think it was bullshit but I was pretty delusional for a few days following my heroic dose, I was fully convinced they were somehow showing me my actual future rather than my subconscious perceptions. Not that this was destructive at all, in fact it probably helped me integrate, but it was still quite absurd.
The thing is psychedelic psychosis always resolves itself short-term, unless you went into it with these kinds of issues to start with. I know a week later I was like "wtf dude how did u believe that"
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/26847689/ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5813062/
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DJ Ed
Mushroom Engineer


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Yeah it can seriously f*ck with your mind, KJ. It’s this type of mental feeling I have been referring to in related posts; where you can feel it in your bones whether or not you’re overdoing it. Could be as you said, that after your 5g it took a few days to integrate, then you couldn’t understand what all the fuss had been about! That’s how it was for me, having overdone it for about 2 years, except it took me a few months to get over the worst. I think it’s taken another 30 years to get over the rest!
Stay safe all , DJ Ed
-------------------- “It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.” Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind “The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.” Terence McKenna

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Korean Jesus



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Re: psychosis [Re: DJ Ed]
#26502851 - 02/25/20 09:53 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Yeah, thing is if you really are delusional you wouldn't have the logic to know. IDK, I've found mushrooms to be by far the self-regulating pyschedelic in terms of knowing when to stop, but who knows what one might be thinking?
As long as you go into it knowing that your mind will be affected by a substance, and you should probably defer to your pre-trip judgement for at least little while, I think it's easier to put aside delusions. But they have never convinced me of dangerous things, so I'm not sure whether they could and whether I'd be able to handle it (although I suspect that I would)...
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DJ Ed
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I had a couple of really heavy liberty cap trips, but it was LSD that I abused!
Recently returned to psychedelics, but have stuck entirely to mushrooms. I have found they tell me when I need a break.........
-------------------- “It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.” Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind “The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.” Terence McKenna

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Eclipse3130
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Re: psychosis [Re: DJ Ed]
#26502871 - 02/25/20 10:07 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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“The psychotic drowns in the same waters in which the mystic swims with delight.”
I go into what one would consider "psychosis" every trip, except I understand that it is just another dimension of reality, not something to be scared of. Sometimes this connection persists for a little while after a trip as well, as you are integrating your expanded consciousness.
Some people spend years mostly denying a profound spiritual experience because they are afraid of dispensing with their conception of what is healthy, of being labeled schizophrenic, or prescribed antipsychotics. They lack the spiritual understanding, and support system around to ground them in higher knowledge, instead they get stuck breaking through old society conditioning programs, and trying to make sense of their experience from a logical level
-------------------- "In The Material World One seeks retirement and grows Old In The Magical World One seeks Enlightenment and grows Wiser In The Miraculous World One seeks nothing and grows Lighter As we all tread the Homeward Path we will explore many Realms And one day... we will all Realize that all experiences are Simply Different ways in which The All-That Is Perceives Itself"
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Korean Jesus



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Everyone gets psychosis on trips. Not getting psychosis would mean no visuals, no distortions, no dissociation!
what a trip that would be, lol
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Eclipse3130
Servant of the Fungi



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Quote:
Korean Jesus said: Everyone gets psychosis on trips. Not getting psychosis would mean no visuals, no distortions, no dissociation!
what a trip that would be, lol
Yes, the only difference is fear or something akin to shouting "I'm god!" everywhere they go - takes over the person's mind for whatever reason, a shock to the system from what they experienced and severe lack of spiritual understanding, experience, knowledge and being born into a society with a lack of this as well.
I could have easily turned myself into the psych wards multiple times, except I knew what I was experiencing was real, and that society wouldn't understand and throw labels on me. I've had experiences sober that someone without spiritual development would convince themselves they are going nuts, especially if you haven't broken down all of the societies programs running through your head, and trust in your own experience and intuition.
-------------------- "In The Material World One seeks retirement and grows Old In The Magical World One seeks Enlightenment and grows Wiser In The Miraculous World One seeks nothing and grows Lighter As we all tread the Homeward Path we will explore many Realms And one day... we will all Realize that all experiences are Simply Different ways in which The All-That Is Perceives Itself"
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O_Dweeds
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Never seen it with mushrooms; however frequently with LSD (& other RC's) use and occasionally (much more mild) with heavy,long-term daily cannabis use.
-------------------- Oxygen. Water. Neil Young Our word "planet" comes from the Greek word planetes, meaning "wanderer." "There ain't no revolution, only evolution, but every time I'm in Georgia I eat a peach for peace." Gregg Allman
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Korean Jesus



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Weed has been shown time & time again NOT to cause psychosis (while not intoxicated)
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ninja cat 09
A paranoid android



Registered: 10/11/09
Posts: 4,170
Loc: Mexico
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Quote:
Korean Jesus said: Weed has been shown time & time again NOT to cause psychosis (while not intoxicated)
I think you're wrong buddy: https://www.thelancet.com/journals/lanpsy/article/PIIS2215-0366(19)30048-3/fulltext
From what I understand of the study, the risk is increased while you use cannabis, especially if it's a high-potency variety.
Back when I was a more socially anxious individual it would really make me have some impactful paranoia, especially when I used it for long times. Now I can laugh most of it off, but back then I was convinced (and possibly right, being a giant white dude in the middle of Mexico) that everyone was staring at me or that they knew I was high or thought I was a shit person.
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Sabnock
Be Your Own Shaman


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As far as psychosis and weed goes, it's really not the weed that causes the psychosis, it's one's predisposition to psychosis that the weed (or other substances) can bring out, though it's been said weed has more potential to induce a psychosis in susceptible individuals compared to Psychedelics. Don't get me wrong, i was a big fan of Cannabis, and still believe it to be a very useful plant, but over time i've realized more of it's potential for negative or undesirable effects, not necessarily something like psychosis, but paranoia and anxiety and feeling awkward and uncomfortable and trippy, which can be useful if approached as a Psychedelic, but as far as regular use goes, been there done that daily for 10 years until recently when i decided to quit. I took Aya daily/near daily for 4 years, and compared to that, Cannabis caused me more side-effects ime.
Edited by Sabnock (02/25/20 06:00 PM)
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ninja cat 09
A paranoid android



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Re: psychosis [Re: Sabnock] 1
#26503667 - 02/25/20 05:34 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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I agree, it's got side effects that aren't great. It's part of what annoys me about some parts of the cannabis community, it's ridiculous to think that ingesting a drug won't have any side effects. Even having too much water can be dangerous.
That being said, I've been using it almost daily for a while now and it's helped me stay more calm and get stuff done. The only problem I have is when I use an edible that isn't evenly dosed, but even then, I err on the side of caution and tend to use less than I think will work, just in case.
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Eclipse3130
Servant of the Fungi



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Quote:
ninja cat 09 said: I agree, it's got side effects that aren't great. It's part of what annoys me about some parts of the cannabis community, it's ridiculous to think that ingesting a drug won't have any side effects. Even having too much water can be dangerous.
That being said, I've been using it almost daily for a while now and it's helped me stay more calm and get stuff done. The only problem I have is when I use an edible that isn't evenly dosed, but even then, I err on the side of caution and tend to use less than I think will work, just in case.
It's an easy drug to abuse because the spirit of cannabis likes to please your desire, she will accommodate to your intention and desire, you can run away from problems with it, like any other drug, use it as an escape or a relaxer and think it's fine - and just like any other drug, you end up using more, and become a drug addict - smoking more often, turning to concentrates - your problems end up resurfacing more severe later down the road, sometimes in the form of a psychotic break.
Tons of people say "it's my medicine" as an easy denial to their addiction, when in reality they are just using it to get high
It has less severe physical side effects than most other drugs, especially long term, and probably less mental ones as well.. "I've been using it almost daily for a while now and it's helped me stay more calm and get stuff done." can be said for alcohol, xanax or put any drug really in place of that statement
When I was using it daily, I use to think the same things, in reality it was just masking my real problems, I later realized I didn't need cannabis for what I could do myself by natural means and stopped using it entirely, I was addicted to it for quite some time just like any other addict
-------------------- "In The Material World One seeks retirement and grows Old In The Magical World One seeks Enlightenment and grows Wiser In The Miraculous World One seeks nothing and grows Lighter As we all tread the Homeward Path we will explore many Realms And one day... we will all Realize that all experiences are Simply Different ways in which The All-That Is Perceives Itself"
Edited by Eclipse3130 (02/25/20 05:49 PM)
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Northerner
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Psychedelic psychosis can be really sneaky. Especially if you've been working at it a while, building up more and more complex fantasies. You don't even realise you are in the middle of it when it's happening.
A few years back I did quite a lot of acid and DMT over about 4 or 5 months. I really didn't understand how deep in the hole I was until I was already climbing out. Took about 6 months to come right and another 6 months to hit base line.
It was DMT that stopped me pushing it any further. Major kick in the ass wake up call.
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The nearest we ever come to knowing truth is when we are witness to paradox.
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ninja cat 09
A paranoid android



Registered: 10/11/09
Posts: 4,170
Loc: Mexico
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Quote:
Eclipse3130 said: When I was using it daily, I use to think the same things, in reality it was just masking my real problems, I later realized I didn't need cannabis for what I could do myself by natural means and stopped using it entirely, I was addicted to it for quite some time just like any other addict
You're right, my use drops when I'm accomplishing and doing more things, I'm in a spot where it's hard to do as much as I'd like, but I'm getting better, started going to therapy. Hopefully I can identify and treat the root of the issues and decide wether I should keep using cannabis or not. For now, I will, but I don't picture myself smoking all day every day in the future.
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Korean Jesus



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Weed will not cause pyschosis. It might exacerbate latent illness but study after study has shown that it is not the cause.
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Vibe_Enthusiast
Mushroom Technician



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I just tread lightly after my experience in October. These things can really take you passed the filters of every day life and social views. I bring those same thoughts into my sober mind and it actually freaks me out.
Like the purpose behind all of this. That we are on a rock spinning through space and have a conciousnes mind of our own impermanence. It's just one hell of a rabbit hole when you break it down into perspective from such an absurd point of view.
There's been a few times where I've felt "off the waggon", but that's kind of the whole intent of mushrooms, honestly. It's a wake up call. You don't need to have a reality earth shattering experience to feel the power of an awakening either - that's a huge stigma if I have ever heard one.
We're all a little crazy here. But sober reality and tripping reality... is still reality in different perspectives... even though it feels delusional. Science, logic, math.. all of that becomes all irrelevant. When you realize the bigger picture.
We're so captivated by building bigger things, taking the next step into technology, understanding where and how the universe works.. when in reality it could all be one big video game. One big simulation. I'm not a conspiracy theorist, but literally anything can be going on right now.
There's even been times where I am in my head about - what's about if this is all a dream? All of my interaction with all of you is completely in my "head" - and none of this is real - I'm just in a brief dream inside of a meat body.
Sounds "crazy", but it's also crazy to NOT think this way.. like we know what the fuck we are talking about
The universe is the beholder of the key, were just offspring. Wee act like we are so special because we are alive... and have a brain. But then you look into space and see these magnificent creations of planets & stars, galaxy's.. that have no brain(that we know of) and we think we're the alpha. It's something else.
Edited by Vibe_Enthusiast (02/26/20 06:32 AM)
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DJ Ed
Mushroom Engineer


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I get the exact same feelings vibe_enthusiast. It really does feel delusional though, in a going mad sort of way, when you do focus on; “what if everyone else is a non—player character?” I’m convinced there are only 3 or 4 actual “real” souls, real energies that I interface with in my life.....
It’s also similar when people talk of living in a simulation. A freaky thought I’ve heard is comparing life to a video game; imagine Minecraft. You build some houses and trees, then turn around so they disappear off screen. Do they still exist? So the analogy I’m getting at is, you have a close circle that you interface with daily; is everyone else an NPC?
-------------------- “It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.” Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind “The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.” Terence McKenna

Edited by DJ Ed (02/26/20 06:38 AM)
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Vibe_Enthusiast
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Re: psychosis [Re: DJ Ed]
#26504553 - 02/26/20 09:16 AM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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That's EXACTLY what I'm saying man. Sometimes it does feel that way. Especially when you really get in your mind about it. It's definitely a freaky thought and totally out there.. but it's also very rational in the same sense.
I'm by no means saying thats what I completely believe in, nor am I saying I don't. I'm very limbo with a lot of my beliefs as I am very open minded and always love to take new perspectives into consideration.. even if they're my own.
When people say you can't "change" in one day is complete and utter bullshit. It takes one thought for you to completely ditch your other beliefs and follow something else.
Just like when I quit smoking cigarettes a few months ago.. I was hanging out with my friend then day after I quit- he questioned me when he caught on I haven't smoked a cigarette. He asked "you need one"? - I then proceeded to tell him how I quit. He replied with "haha you were just smoking yesterday...".
I have not smoked since the day I have quit. Kinda not sure where I was going with this.. but I'm just saying its always good to keep an open mind and always account for variable change.
One thought can be everything just as one action can. Always challenging myself with new thoughts and perspectives on things without the "science" behind it, if that makes sense? I like to let my free mind roam the idea of life itself without being suppressed by any "logic" set it stone by any social normality.. which I guess in return is - "crazy"
Edited by Vibe_Enthusiast (02/26/20 09:32 AM)
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DJ Ed
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I love reading your posts, vibe_enthusiast, I feel so much empathy with what you say. I like how you note certain thoughts can be irrational, but that is also rational 👊🏻
-------------------- “It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.” Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind “The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.” Terence McKenna

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BabylonRuleDem
Dude... I'm so liQuiD



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Re: psychosis [Re: DJ Ed]
#26505085 - 02/26/20 03:56 PM (3 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Vibe_Enthusiast said: We're all a little crazy here.
Most everyone's mad here
-------------------- When we all get strange, and we know it, but we're cool with it
Trade List(WIP)
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Northerner
splelling chceker


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It can be fun to play with unusual thought patterns and crazy stuff, but this is not psychosis. When you are experiencing psychosis 99.9% of the time you will not know. Your illusions will be completely real. You won't think you are delusional as you will be delusional. It is so real that no one can convince you otherwise. You might know something is wrong, but you won't know what.
It can be a really difficult experience for everyone involved.
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The nearest we ever come to knowing truth is when we are witness to paradox.
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DJ Ed
Mushroom Engineer


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Put int those terms, northerner, it sounds horrific!
-------------------- “It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.” Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind “The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.” Terence McKenna

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Eclipse3130
Servant of the Fungi



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Quote:
Northerner said: It can be fun to play with unusual thought patterns and crazy stuff, but this is not psychosis. When you are experiencing psychosis 99.9% of the time you will not know. Your illusions will be completely real. You won't think you are delusional as you will be delusional. It is so real that no one can convince you otherwise. You might know something is wrong, but you won't know what.
It can be a really difficult experience for everyone involved.
Indeed, I have witnessed a real psychotic break in a family member, the triggers could of been many, but I believe a leading cause to these things is actual physical brain damage, I'm sure there are other causes as well.
The person in psychosis won't know they are in it as it is their real reality they believe and live - and therefore most likely wouldn't make a post about it asking if they had psychosis.
Usually people that recover from it still believe in the reality of the time when it occurred.
Part of me believes it is just an altered state of consciousness, and the brain not connecting the right dots, something definitely goes wrong if this is a prolonged state.
We enter into altered states of consciousness that can be perceived from an outsider as temporary psychosis during trips. Negative psychosis occurs when it lasts for a much longer duration and what you are experiencing is clearly not real from outsiders standpoints. You can have an altered state of consciousness that can appear like psychosis based on what you experienced and now believe in, what makes it negative if it negatively impacts yourself and life, and lasts for a long duration
-------------------- "In The Material World One seeks retirement and grows Old In The Magical World One seeks Enlightenment and grows Wiser In The Miraculous World One seeks nothing and grows Lighter As we all tread the Homeward Path we will explore many Realms And one day... we will all Realize that all experiences are Simply Different ways in which The All-That Is Perceives Itself"
Edited by Eclipse3130 (02/27/20 01:28 AM)
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Northerner
splelling chceker


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That's sad to hear Eclipse. It's super hard on families as there's nothing they can do. Eating well, exercise, meditation or any other activity does nothing to help. Anti-psychotic medication may help but depending on the nature of the psychosis the long term outcome could be worse than placebo. All one can do is wait it out and avoid further triggers.
I've played with the frayed ends of sanity a few times in my life. Thankfully always come back whole.
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The nearest we ever come to knowing truth is when we are witness to paradox.
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footpath
ὕδωρχοίρος

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Quote:
Eclipse3130 said: “The psychotic drowns in the same waters in which the mystic swims with delight.”
What a wonderful quote. I feel like all of us who take psychedelics at least flirt with mysticism and some of us tempt psychosis.
I've got natural tendencies toward mania that can really exacerbate and potentiate any delusional thinking/psychosis that I'm also prone to. Depression can, too. But to a lesser extent, I feel. I've also gotten whipped up from psychedelics into a year-long recovery of my orientation in reality. But only the once.
After that one experience and subsequent recovery, I'd still have deeply troubling trips from time to time and, to this day, I still catch my sober self in bouts of delusion. But nothing of such a profound and permeating psychosis - from that experience, I grew a thick skin of awareness and skepticism into any of the compounding romantic beliefs that I'd find myself relentlessly obsessing over. And, most importantly, that awareness was granted for my natural tendency toward manic/depressive delusion. It's easy to stop taking substances, it isn't so easy to navigate chemical/psychological conditions.
Odd as it may sound, the whole of that experience is one of the things that has me hold the most reverence and gratitude to psychedelics - through the complete loss of my sense of reality, they helped to raise my awareness of any of my psychotic meandering. But it was a tightrope walk... I imagine it could have easily tipped me the other way. The waters could have filled my lungs.
So it really was like learning to swim in waters that were gradually rising above my head.
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ninja cat 09
A paranoid android



Registered: 10/11/09
Posts: 4,170
Loc: Mexico
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Quote:
Northerner said: That's sad to hear Eclipse. It's super hard on families as there's nothing they can do. Eating well, exercise, meditation or any other activity does nothing to help. Anti-psychotic medication may help but depending on the nature of the psychosis the long term outcome could be worse than placebo. All one can do is wait it out and avoid further triggers.
I've played with the frayed ends of sanity a few times in my life. Thankfully always come back whole.
I'm glad you're doing alright Northerner, I have a family member who's in a constant state of psychosis and it's not a pretty sight. The doctors always told us that taking meds would have helped, but we never got the chance to figure out if it was true.
I've heard stories from people with type 1 bipolar who have psychotic episodes triggered by any type of drug, including coffee, and the stories they tell are nuts. He thought he was Jesus, in the case of my family member she thinks everyone is conspiring against her.
That's tough to hear footpath, but I'm glad you're managing it successfully! It's difficult to do
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Eclipse3130
Servant of the Fungi



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From my experience the person becomes very ungrounded in themselves and loses their own sense of self, and becomes fully integrated in their mind/thoughts, which most of the time they are succumbed to their paranoid delusions, at least the case for my father, about 5 years ago he began believing my mother was cheating on him, he racked up over 60 potential guys, would always harass her, hired private investigators to stalk the house, etc. He would follow random people driving on the streets believing it was somebody cheating, he even accused my at the time girlfriends Grandpa to be one of them. Eventually he broke down from the stress, at one point he broke into the neighbors house in the middle of the night, crawling on the floor begging for answers crying. And one night I found him nearly overdosed on pills as he tried to end it.
They eventually had to part ways when no actual infidelity was happening, he now lives with his mom. He still believes in everything that he thought happened back then, keeping them separated.
A true psychosis, also known as Othello Syndrome in this case
-------------------- "In The Material World One seeks retirement and grows Old In The Magical World One seeks Enlightenment and grows Wiser In The Miraculous World One seeks nothing and grows Lighter As we all tread the Homeward Path we will explore many Realms And one day... we will all Realize that all experiences are Simply Different ways in which The All-That Is Perceives Itself"
Edited by Eclipse3130 (02/27/20 09:48 AM)
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footpath
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That's on the more common end of the spectrum, too.
I recently had an uncle who, over the course of a few years completely detached himself from the world. And his world was active - he had maintained the same job for 30 years, he was a volunteer firefighter, he belonged to a traditional Irish bagpipe and drum band/historic society (wer'e not Irish), and he was the most jubilant and present sibling of the bunch in regard to his extended family. He had no wife or kids, so he made up for it with community.
His presence incrementally declined. He'd gone through a few health problems, so everyone chocked it up to that. But then he stopped answering calls. He was 'never home' - occasionally his car would be found a half mile from his house, but no one would have heard from him or seen him. And, eventually his presence disappeared almost completely except for his mail/newspaper being taken in. The few times he'd opened the door and his family or friends insisted to offer some help, he'd return it with threats of violence or calling the police. Twice, he said to my dad (his eldest brother), 'I have a gun in the house.'
And then his mail started to pile up.
It was a neighbor who had eventually called the police, who found that he'd taken his own life.
When we went to clean out his house, we found it riddled with writing on the walls - he'd left notes about leaks, drafts, outlets that didn't work, etc. Eventually we found a stack of notepads with frantic details about how everyone was out to get him, that the people who came to his house weren't who they said they were, and how the hospitals had removed certain parts of his body and replaced them with technological devices.
It was the closest experience with schizophrenic psychosis I've witnessed. And it was far too easy draw parallels to the extended bout of psychedelic-induced psychosis I had experienced many years prior. I knew what kind of pain he was going through. I felt that sense of ostracization all over again because I could so much sympathize with what I could gather that he was experiencing. If my symptoms had persisted much longer than they did, no doubt I'd have taken the same route.
So I was again taken with the appreciation for my experiences with psychedelics. And, contrary to some doubts, it was routine that took me out of it more than anything else. Exercise, nourishment, rest, meditative exercises, and repetition - I had to create my own new sense of normalcy before any of the previous aspects had returned to me at all.
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Eclipse3130
Servant of the Fungi



Registered: 10/06/13
Posts: 6,220
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 1 hour, 39 seconds
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How is your relationship with psychedelics now a days?
-------------------- "In The Material World One seeks retirement and grows Old In The Magical World One seeks Enlightenment and grows Wiser In The Miraculous World One seeks nothing and grows Lighter As we all tread the Homeward Path we will explore many Realms And one day... we will all Realize that all experiences are Simply Different ways in which The All-That Is Perceives Itself"
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footpath
ὕδωρχοίρος

Registered: 07/16/19
Posts: 1,367
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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Mostly just therapeutic mushroom microdosing for anxiety and bipolar disorders. Treats me quite well.
I regularly macrodose, too. For the most part, it's just fun and introspective. If I take heavy doses, I'll occasionally find a rough time that confronts me with something a little deeper than I had anticipated. I think that's the main thing about the relationship - my own anticipations based on my state of being. I have a pretty keen sense of when is an inappropriate time to take them. If I'm caught up in a period of turbulent swings, I know that taking a larger dose can easily go detrimental. I've not been terribly willing to confront that possible detriment to see if I can push through any further, as I don't think it's one of those things that you can approach in terms of normal dissolving/reassmbling of a trait or characteristic. I can poke at other things about my psyche... not my chemical imbalance. I believe where I'm at is pretty comfortable.
Sorry, that probably doesn't read so well... I took a tea of a couple grams about an hour ago.
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Eclipse3130
Servant of the Fungi



Registered: 10/06/13
Posts: 6,220
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 1 hour, 39 seconds
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Interesting, I will micro dose sometimes, very rarely. And I don't necessarily partake in larger doses anymore, I am on the sober path of the "yogi" if that's what you want to call it, finding ways, and using my own self for spiritual, mental, and emotional development. Seems to be keeping me fairly centered in my self as of late, and I know if I was to trip it would just connect me with my self, because that's what it does every time, so I feel they are not necessary at this stage in my life, but not to say they won't return some day
-------------------- "In The Material World One seeks retirement and grows Old In The Magical World One seeks Enlightenment and grows Wiser In The Miraculous World One seeks nothing and grows Lighter As we all tread the Homeward Path we will explore many Realms And one day... we will all Realize that all experiences are Simply Different ways in which The All-That Is Perceives Itself"
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DJ Ed
Mushroom Engineer


Registered: 09/04/16
Posts: 2,326
Loc: UK
Last seen: 1 month, 28 days
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There are some horrendous and upsetting stories in here; I feel for all affected. Never suffered a full-blown psychosis myself, but I’ve been borderline. I have been LUCKY, by the grace of god!
Many years ago, my best friend and one of two trip buddies developed paranoid schizophrenia. At the time, we were not 100% sure what caused it; we were taking LSD regularly, and Liberty cap mushrooms occasionally. Then his mum died at age about 40.
Next thing, “Dickie”, turned up at my house, me with my 6 month old son upstairs asleep. Dickie proceeded to tell me about the prophecies.........
His girlfriend, Wendy, was a long lost resurrected Queen of Ireland, and he was a long lost resurrected King of Ireland. And the people who run the country were telling him this.
But then he proceeded to tell me that it wasn’t the people that I thought ran the country, the politicians etc. No, it was the real people who run the country.
“How do you know this?”, I asked.
“Because the real people that run the country are telling me......in my head!”
Really upset I made him some food then asked him to leave. I had lost my best friend there and then; it was like he had ceased to exist. I never got over this. About 15 years later, when he had been let out of the psychiatric ward, into “care in the community”, he was found dead outside his flat, after having been beaten to death by a group of Asian lads.........
That’s my closest experiences with psychosis, and it’s haunted me for almost 35 years.
Mush love DJ Ed
-------------------- “It’s like when you see a mountain lion,” he suggested. “If you run, it will chase you. So you must stand your ground.” Michael Pollan: How To Change Your Mind “The problem is not to find the answer, it’s to face the answer.” Terence McKenna

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hummingbird

Registered: 06/29/14
Posts: 2,134
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Quote:
Northerner said: Psychedelic psychosis can be really sneaky. Especially if you've been working at it a while, building up more and more complex fantasies. You don't even realise you are in the middle of it when it's happening.
A few years back I did quite a lot of acid and DMT over about 4 or 5 months. I really didn't understand how deep in the hole I was until I was already climbing out. Took about 6 months to come right and another 6 months to hit base line.
It was DMT that stopped me pushing it any further. Major kick in the ass wake up call.
I can relate to this a lot, almost like I could have written it. About 10 years ago... Roughly a year into tripping weekly on acid, MDMA, and a bit of DMT too. There were other factors contributing to what eventually happened, but it ended with a huge hit of DMT shattering my reality and putting an end to the routine...definitely a wake up call.
I became extremely paranoid and delusional. Started believing some pretty strange things. Something like I had been given a secret of the universe, and people were out to get me...as well as other things. Stopped answering my phone, and pushed nearly everyone away. Didn't have a proper support network and eventually ended up getting committed for a week to a psych ward and put on anti psychotic meds. Didn't really help. I completely lost sense of who I was and what I enjoyed, and had to kind of rebuild that over time. Took me about 8 or 9 months being sober to feel like I wasn't a step away from falling back into it.
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footpath
ὕδωρχοίρος

Registered: 07/16/19
Posts: 1,367
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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Quote:
Eclipse3130 said: Interesting, I will micro dose sometimes, very rarely. And I don't necessarily partake in larger doses anymore, I am on the sober path of the "yogi" if that's what you want to call it, finding ways, and using my own self for spiritual, mental, and emotional development. Seems to be keeping me fairly centered in my self as of late, and I know if I was to trip it would just connect me with my self, because that's what it does every time, so I feel they are not necessary at this stage in my life, but not to say they won't return some day
I think that's the way I'd eventually like to go. If I can.
I'll have long stretches where I'm free of everything but basic sustenance. No wine or or beer, no coffee or tea, not even the supplemental herbs I take, and especially no psychedelics or drugs. I have this romantic idea that what the old Wudang/Taoist monks say is true in that, through meditation and meditative exercises (namely tai chi/qigong), you can achieve the full ability to consciously heal yourself with internal forces - included in that, the ability to consciously reach euphoric/psychedelic states. I do find great appreciation in my daily life and perspectives/introspection and I can often get a very similar state of mind to psychedelics through my activities, but I have the problem with being too far in my own mind. Where psychedelics really help me is in the disconnect from myself. They help to kind of cleanse the palate, so to say. So I still don't feel like I'm nearly at the end of the road with what I can gain from them, nor do I feel I'm very close to that body control. Increments.
I also have the 'you only have one life' attitude shouting at me from time to time - why not just have a fucking blast?
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badger13
Stranger
Registered: 12/17/19
Posts: 22
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
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Thank you guys for sharing! i recently went throught this ended up in the psych ward for a week a few months ago and still recovering allthough i am 95% better...but yeh the delusions and paranoia got bad. thinking everything was out to get me. thinking the pharmacy was going to poision my meds was the worst thing cause it kept me from taking what i needed to get better. It seriously put the brakes on tripping so much. there is 1 thing that triggered it and i dont know if ill ever be able to return to that wich sucks cause it was very special to me....
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Shr00mEater
Strange

Registered: 10/17/18
Posts: 985
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Quote:
hummingbird said: I became extremely paranoid and delusional. Started believing some pretty strange things. Something like I had been given a secret of the universe, and people were out to get me...as well as other things
Isn’t it interesting how the descriptions of strong delusional or psychotic states are so similar? Secrets of knowledge or powers, contact or communication from invisible sources, realizing family and friends are trying to hinder your mission, etc etc
If a person hasn’t read a lot of trip reports, or met some of the people here, or been there themselves, it’s hard for them to imagine how such ‘far out’ concepts seem to make perfect sense when looking out from on the inside. I think, some people want to imagine instead, that it should be simple to “talk him down”, maybe point out the logical errors or wild emotions with the intent of getting the loony person to change their views. After going thru a strong episode, afterward, it’s easier to notice how pretty much everyone on the planet is somewhat delusional. It seems mostly, that it is the intensity and duration of the state which makes everyone else take notice and become concerned.
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