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Thanatos10
Stranger


Registered: 01/19/15
Posts: 2,770
Loc: South Florida
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
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My life is not mine 1
#26488649 - 02/16/20 04:11 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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I don’t know where else to post this so here goes.
I’ll make it quickish, I feel like my life is not my own. It feels I’m just following the advice or ministrations of another person because I want to be correct. I have this crippling desire for approval of something and I seek it from all sides (even a few places on here and many others). I have forgotten what it was like to do something because I liked it or to laugh without looking to see if anyone else is. It feels like I’m pulled in all directions and I’m not sure how to stop.
-------------------- As lightless oblivion devours you, drown in the ever-blooming darkness.
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RJ Tubs 202


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,016
Loc: USA
Last seen: 1 hour, 30 minutes
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Re: My life is not mine [Re: Thanatos10]
#26493387 - 02/19/20 12:54 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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It's a common experience. Feeling fractured and lacking unification and wholeness. Dissociation is a psychological experience where we feel disconnected from ourselves. Some people refer to being "centered" versus not. Self-compassion and acceptance practices can help.
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Thanatos10
Stranger


Registered: 01/19/15
Posts: 2,770
Loc: South Florida
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
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If I had to put a point to it my guess is that I often do things to get approval from others but not because I like it, or if I genuinely like it I worry that others don’t as well.
-------------------- As lightless oblivion devours you, drown in the ever-blooming darkness.
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Spiralspider
Bigguy

Registered: 06/20/16
Posts: 223
Last seen: 2 months, 28 days
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Re: My life is not mine [Re: Thanatos10]
#26494874 - 02/20/20 10:33 AM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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I feel exactly the same .. whats the explanation for this?
Maybe stress?
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pivotingpenguin

Registered: 08/04/17
Posts: 1,126
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Re: My life is not mine [Re: Thanatos10]
#26499099 - 02/22/20 09:13 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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stop tiptoeing around other people, do what you want & accept the consequences, one of which may be happiness as a result of freeing your mind. they wanna box us into 1 school of thought sometimes, but we can always drop out. leaving your comfort zone, being open minded & embracing change can be good
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RJ Tubs 202


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,016
Loc: USA
Last seen: 1 hour, 30 minutes
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Quote:
Spiralspider said:
I feel exactly the same .. whats the explanation for this?
Compared to how humans lived before civilization, modern people experience a tiny amount of intimacy and social interaction, so maybe our need for approval has become greatly exaggerated. If we feel a strong need for approval, it's because we are lacking something in our lives.
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Thanatos10
Stranger


Registered: 01/19/15
Posts: 2,770
Loc: South Florida
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
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Quote:
pivotingpenguin said: stop tiptoeing around other people, do what you want & accept the consequences, one of which may be happiness as a result of freeing your mind. they wanna box us into 1 school of thought sometimes, but we can always drop out. leaving your comfort zone, being open minded & embracing change can be good
This page isn’t that different from them really.
-------------------- As lightless oblivion devours you, drown in the ever-blooming darkness.
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