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theRealrollforever
I DID-DENT



Registered: 08/31/13
Posts: 12,736
Loc: Bada-Bing!
Last seen: 2 days, 1 hour
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Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you?
#26438044 - 01/17/20 08:38 AM (4 years, 12 days ago) |
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I am breaking up with my gf because she has slowly tried to manipulate me out of caring about my family and vice versa. Luckily she failed and now I can leave and try to rebuild my life. She lied to my family to try to get me stuck with her. But then she bitches about anything she can to try to upset me. She knows I have trouble dealing with people because of my anger but she utilizes this to get the upper hand emotionally. I absolutely despise and resent her. I needed to get this off my chest
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sunshine said: The order has to be secret and no one is sure.
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Huskies
Boop More Snoots



Registered: 03/22/16
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: theRealrollforever] 1
#26438058 - 01/17/20 08:47 AM (4 years, 12 days ago) |
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Look into Narcissistic Personality Disorder
-------------------- I call them Huskies cause you tell them to go "Mush! Mush""
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theRealrollforever
I DID-DENT



Registered: 08/31/13
Posts: 12,736
Loc: Bada-Bing!
Last seen: 2 days, 1 hour
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: Huskies]
#26438069 - 01/17/20 08:53 AM (4 years, 12 days ago) |
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I think she is just an alcoholic with control issues.  She does the “I never said that” a lot though
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sunshine said: The order has to be secret and no one is sure.
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sonoramo
Contaminant



Registered: 02/27/19
Posts: 851
Loc: California, baby!
Last seen: 3 hours, 59 minutes
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: theRealrollforever]
#26438072 - 01/17/20 08:56 AM (4 years, 12 days ago) |
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Quote:
theRealrollforever said: I think she is just an alcoholic with control issues.  She does the “I never said that” a lot though
Like Huskies wrote,... Narcissistic Personality Disorder. There is no cure, and trying to fix her will only make you miserable. Kudos to you for taking the step of letting her go her own way.
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Huskies
Boop More Snoots



Registered: 03/22/16
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: sonoramo]
#26438091 - 01/17/20 09:07 AM (4 years, 12 days ago) |
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Alcoholism would make it worse.
Narcissism is like psychopathy light. They aren't emotionless, but they see people only as extensions.
Their main tools: gaslighting, denial, demeaning,
A narcissist is made, not born. If her parents were controlling abusive types, it's the fucking cycle.
You deserve someone who will not hurt you to make themselves try to feel stronger.
https://outofthefog.website/personality-disorders-1/2015/12/6/narcissistic-personality-disorder-npd
-------------------- I call them Huskies cause you tell them to go "Mush! Mush""
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theRealrollforever
I DID-DENT



Registered: 08/31/13
Posts: 12,736
Loc: Bada-Bing!
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: sonoramo]
#26438098 - 01/17/20 09:09 AM (4 years, 12 days ago) |
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Thanks. It was really hard for me to accept I am powerless over how she treats me and that trying to improve anything would just make me depressed and frustrated. Today is the first day of the rest of my life. I was also stuck financially if I wanted to continue my dream/goal of being a glass artist that can make a living without a second job. I am getting there but she absolutely sucked my motivation. She pretty much lived out in the garage by my bench and would say things about how my art will never be good enough, and that it’s a waste of time to pursue my dreams. Really sliced me deep and made me say things I regret.
She would literally deny things she said as little as last night. She is drinking herself to death and can’t hold down food. She then proceeds to tell me it is the “stress I’m putting on her” that makes her vomit up her stomach bile. Just total denial of her condition
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sunshine said: The order has to be secret and no one is sure.
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Huskies
Boop More Snoots



Registered: 03/22/16
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: theRealrollforever]
#26438131 - 01/17/20 09:20 AM (4 years, 12 days ago) |
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Yeah man, run like the wind my boy!
And I believe in your glass blowing! You can do it! Do not let someone who is so fucked up inside that they must oppress others guide you.
-------------------- I call them Huskies cause you tell them to go "Mush! Mush""
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PsychedelicNinja15
Stranger
Registered: 04/01/19
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: theRealrollforever]
#26438133 - 01/17/20 09:20 AM (4 years, 12 days ago) |
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She could be a witch. My cousins baby momma put a curse on him then brainwashed my uncle into marrying her but she’s just how you describe. Manipulative now my uncle has a kid with her and the other kid has an “imaginary friend who she can see and talk to”. Good thing you got out of this when you did.
Edited by PsychedelicNinja15 (01/17/20 09:24 AM)
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theRealrollforever
I DID-DENT



Registered: 08/31/13
Posts: 12,736
Loc: Bada-Bing!
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: PsychedelicNinja15]
#26438167 - 01/17/20 09:30 AM (4 years, 12 days ago) |
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Talk to the people you are being alienated from. This takes courage - but go talk to the people whom you have been told are monsters, or who have been told what a flaky, dysfunctional, abusive person you are. Make up your own mind about them, and let them do the same. Perhaps they are monsters, perhaps not - you may be surprised by what you learn.
This is exactly what she did, That was a good link man
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sunshine said: The order has to be secret and no one is sure.
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Huskies
Boop More Snoots



Registered: 03/22/16
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: theRealrollforever]
#26438176 - 01/17/20 09:34 AM (4 years, 12 days ago) |
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<3 Out of the Fog Indeed
You've got this dude! Whoever she chased away, are the people who can help you.
Be honest, apologize for going with her behavior, and say that you are thankful that they accept your reaching out.
-------------------- I call them Huskies cause you tell them to go "Mush! Mush""
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: Huskies]
#26438193 - 01/17/20 09:39 AM (4 years, 12 days ago) |
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I've dealt with this type of spouse for 20 years now. It will not get better and you WILL be all alone one day if you don't leave. Stop trying and save yourself.
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Jewstress
Momma


Registered: 03/21/19
Posts: 5,402
Loc: everywhere.
Last seen: 2 days, 1 hour
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: Huskies]
#26442123 - 01/19/20 06:33 PM (4 years, 10 days ago) |
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Quote:
Huskies said: Look into Narcissistic Personality Disorder
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Jewstress
Momma


Registered: 03/21/19
Posts: 5,402
Loc: everywhere.
Last seen: 2 days, 1 hour
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: Anonymous #1]
#26442125 - 01/19/20 06:34 PM (4 years, 10 days ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: I've dealt with this type of spouse for 20 years now. It will not get better and you WILL be all alone one day if you don't leave. Stop trying and save yourself.
Five years for me. But truth
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1234go
Ban Lotto Champion


Registered: 07/08/09
Posts: 53,833
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: theRealrollforever]
#26444535 - 01/21/20 09:43 AM (4 years, 8 days ago) |
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I dated, and was engaged to a girl with very similar issues. I'll just say it was an exhausting relationship, and a huge load off of my back when I ended it. There was never any reasoning with her when she got in those moods, and it was clear that her goal was to make me feel as crazy as she did. It worked, and had me behaving like a child...like her. Good for you for letting her go...it's gonna be much from now on....lol.
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SynKyd
ctrl-alt-delite



Registered: 09/27/13
Posts: 1,554
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Last seen: 2 years, 9 months
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: theRealrollforever]
#26447072 - 01/22/20 07:43 PM (4 years, 6 days ago) |
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Quote:
theRealrollforever said: I am breaking up with my gf because she has slowly tried to manipulate me out of caring about my family and vice versa. Luckily she failed and now I can leave and try to rebuild my life. She lied to my family to try to get me stuck with her. But then she bitches about anything she can to try to upset me. She knows I have trouble dealing with people because of my anger but she utilizes this to get the upper hand emotionally. I absolutely despise and resent her. I needed to get this off my chest
Quote:
theRealrollforever said: I think she is just an alcoholic with control issues.  She does the “I never said that” a lot though
Quote:
theRealrollforever said: Thanks. It was really hard for me to accept I am powerless over how she treats me and that trying to improve anything would just make me depressed and frustrated. Today is the first day of the rest of my life. I was also stuck financially if I wanted to continue my dream/goal of being a glass artist that can make a living without a second job. I am getting there but she absolutely sucked my motivation. She pretty much lived out in the garage by my bench and would say things about how my art will never be good enough, and that it’s a waste of time to pursue my dreams. Really sliced me deep and made me say things I regret.
She would literally deny things she said as little as last night. She is drinking herself to death and can’t hold down food. She then proceeds to tell me it is the “stress I’m putting on her” that makes her vomit up her stomach bile. Just total denial of her condition
Quote:
theRealrollforever said: Talk to the people you are being alienated from. This takes courage - but go talk to the people whom you have been told are monsters, or who have been told what a flaky, dysfunctional, abusive person you are. Make up your own mind about them, and let them do the same. Perhaps they are monsters, perhaps not - you may be surprised by what you learn.
This is exactly what she did, That was a good link man
She may not know she’s doing it though, that’s the tough part of being a narcisist.......they don’t see it.
-------------------- New inclusive poop emojis from Apple!
   
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theRealrollforever
I DID-DENT



Registered: 08/31/13
Posts: 12,736
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: SynKyd]
#26447074 - 01/22/20 07:44 PM (4 years, 6 days ago) |
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I’m audi r8 Of that situation. (I left)
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sunshine said: The order has to be secret and no one is sure.
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SynKyd
ctrl-alt-delite



Registered: 09/27/13
Posts: 1,554
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: theRealrollforever]
#26447112 - 01/22/20 08:00 PM (4 years, 6 days ago) |
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Sounds like you did what you needed to
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Huskies
Boop More Snoots



Registered: 03/22/16
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: SynKyd]
#26448709 - 01/23/20 05:50 PM (4 years, 6 days ago) |
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Congrats bud! Now to re-engage with the world without a toxic anchor.
-------------------- I call them Huskies cause you tell them to go "Mush! Mush""
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feldman114
Stragler


Registered: 09/06/19
Posts: 3,365
Loc: Bravos
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: PsychedelicNinja15]
#26448714 - 01/23/20 05:53 PM (4 years, 6 days ago) |
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Quote:
PsychedelicNinja15 said: She could be a witch. My cousins baby momma put a curse on him then brainwashed my uncle into marrying her but she’s just how you describe. Manipulative now my uncle has a kid with her and the other kid has an “imaginary friend who she can see and talk to”. Good thing you got out of this when you did.
Wait wait wait... she had your cousin’s kid, then his dad’s kid???
Holy trash, that’s some shit.
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watermelon mon
Willow Trees


Registered: 04/05/13
Posts: 7,800
Last seen: 3 years, 3 months
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: Huskies]
#26454082 - 01/26/20 07:18 PM (4 years, 2 days ago) |
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Quote:
Huskies said: Look into Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Yes. These people had me very close. Close To ending my own life. Esspicaly this one time.
They are very dangerous. They do target me. I did a lot for them because I thought we were together. After I healed from it. All anxiety is gone. I did things and went places. That I thought I could never handle. They got me rolling like a high speed machine.
I cant say what happend but they had me just stuck on the couch. Didnt shower for over 11 days in the summer. some how I made it to a job. Everybody there knew something was wrong with me. Depression. Than I made it to my couch. I felt like that was it.
I fucking hate those people. They get off on that. They are sick. Wolf's that look like sheep.
I actually kind of just got over it. Not so long ago.
If I do ever have a reason not to look forward to tomorrow. I'll be smashing a lot of bricks through a lot of windows. Laughing about it. I know where they live.
Edited by watermelon mon (01/26/20 07:24 PM)
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watermelon mon
Willow Trees


Registered: 04/05/13
Posts: 7,800
Last seen: 3 years, 3 months
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Re: Anyone ever have someone try to turn all your relationships against you? [Re: watermelon mon]
#26454086 - 01/26/20 07:21 PM (4 years, 2 days ago) |
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You know that feeling. When it's just like that's it.
I wont be there again.
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