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Anonymous #2
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Psy Baba]
#26484000 - 02/13/20 04:02 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Fullly clipperd dome with stubble is a strongly appreciated look world wide, have you ever tried it? Seem to have the right face shape for it
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psi
TOAST N' JAM


Registered: 09/05/99
Posts: 31,456
Loc: 613
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Psy Baba]
#26484038 - 02/13/20 04:36 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Psy Baba said: Its cold n rainy here all the time and im balding 
I'm losing my hair too and I figure whatever you do, the main thing is that you carry it with confidence. I don't feel like covering it up or buzzing it or whatever, I want it long. Pretty slow progression in my case though, maybe I would feel differently if it was really advanced relative to my age.
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Psy Baba
That was zen, This is Tao



Registered: 01/30/06
Posts: 16,430
Loc: The land of Ports.
Last seen: 2 years, 7 months
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Anonymous #4]
#26484109 - 02/13/20 05:22 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous #4 said: Yeah try the stubble. It will quickly grow out to a short beard anyway. Get hair clippers and just use the clipper no guard, that’s what I do.
The beanie is at least appropriate for portland. If you were wearing that in hot weather it would be weird. I feel you, I’m losing my hair too and windy rainy weather definitely sucks for that.
Aye aye!
-------------------- --------------------------------------------------- Sit up and meditate, there's no time to contemplate. ------------------------------------------------- I have an international Hitech Psytrance project with a friend: BioChronic I make various form of Psytrance as a solo Project Dendriform
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tyrannicalrex
Strange R



Registered: 04/24/03
Posts: 38,323
Loc: subtropics
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Psy Baba]
#26484226 - 02/13/20 06:55 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Don't listen to that! It will grow back, be adventurous! I mean the beard by the way.
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Thanatos10
Stranger


Registered: 01/19/15
Posts: 2,770
Loc: South Florida
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: tyrannicalrex]
#26484454 - 02/13/20 10:23 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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I personally find you attractive in your OP, but I don't think you're into men.
-------------------- As lightless oblivion devours you, drown in the ever-blooming darkness.
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Anonymous #5
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Psy Baba]
#26484466 - 02/13/20 10:38 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Yeah, you're a good looking dude, man. I think mainly it's just a mental block and perhaps fear of rejection stopping you in part too. I still suggest however that you tone it down on personal opinions or overt physical expressions of your inner self if you want to meet more people, at first. The goal obviously is to meet someone who shares your interests, so it's all up to your discretion, imo.
You seem like a guy heavy into some kind of philosophy at first glance, and personally, I wouldn't mind chatting with you but as soon as you start giving me lessons or opinions, I'll bounce.
I'm a straight dude, however.
I can see girls digging you though. You'll be fine.
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Thanatos10
Stranger


Registered: 01/19/15
Posts: 2,770
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Anonymous #5]
#26484495 - 02/13/20 11:24 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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I agree with the toning down personal opinions. Ease into it first before you break those out. The biggest turn off is feeling like people are being lectured or converted in some way. That's just me.
-------------------- As lightless oblivion devours you, drown in the ever-blooming darkness.
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susurrador
Psychedelic Cowboy


Registered: 03/31/19
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Thanatos10] 1
#26484548 - 02/14/20 01:07 AM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Stop trying.
Focus on you and bettering yourself across the board. A man concerned with being the best possible man he can envision himself as and taking action in that direction is a powerful force.
The specifics of your vision of your best you don't matter. It just needs to be genuine and constantly improving.
You're bound to reach a point where you've got some options.
-------------------- "If it doesn't work, you can always hit him with it."
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ikisschicks420
trainee

Registered: 12/15/19
Posts: 20
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: susurrador] 2
#26484556 - 02/14/20 01:16 AM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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I feel the same way about myself as you, OP. Some thoughts I have on the subject are, to ditch the dating apps; Don't settle for some generic girl you don't feel a connection with (being single is ok too ) ; and don't lose yourself trying to attract someone who wouldn't like the real you. If you're interested in someone romantically, ask them on a a date, yes or no, move on- next phase! Try frequenting places more where your interests make you more likely to interact with ladies into the same things as you if possible. Good luck buddy, you will find what you're looking for
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chibiabos
Cosmic Pond Scum



Registered: 03/16/17
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: ikisschicks420] 2
#26485595 - 02/14/20 02:47 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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I still say worry less about finding the right strategy and just socialize more. Having somebody to screw around with is great, but you'll probably be way happier (and end up becoming a better person all around) if you just get in the habit of being part of your own community. At the very least your social skills will probably be vastly improved, especially if you come from an upbringing that didn't really teach those that well.
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Psy Baba
That was zen, This is Tao



Registered: 01/30/06
Posts: 16,430
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Last seen: 2 years, 7 months
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Thanatos10]
#26490115 - 02/17/20 02:22 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Thanatos10 said: I personally find you attractive in your OP, but I don't think you're into men.
Not sexually, but Doesnt mean I appreciate the sentiment less. Thank you, grateful regardless.
-------------------- --------------------------------------------------- Sit up and meditate, there's no time to contemplate. ------------------------------------------------- I have an international Hitech Psytrance project with a friend: BioChronic I make various form of Psytrance as a solo Project Dendriform
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Psy Baba
That was zen, This is Tao



Registered: 01/30/06
Posts: 16,430
Loc: The land of Ports.
Last seen: 2 years, 7 months
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Anonymous #5]
#26490125 - 02/17/20 02:26 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous #5 said: Yeah, you're a good looking dude, man. I think mainly it's just a mental block and perhaps fear of rejection stopping you in part too. I still suggest however that you tone it down on personal opinions or overt physical expressions of your inner self if you want to meet more people, at first. The goal obviously is to meet someone who shares your interests, so it's all up to your discretion, imo.
You seem like a guy heavy into some kind of philosophy at first glance, and personally, I wouldn't mind chatting with you but as soon as you start giving me lessons or opinions, I'll bounce.
I'm a straight dude, however.
I can see girls digging you though. You'll be fine.
Ab-so-lutely
I have been called out for this many times in my life. I was raised, and bread by my father to be a logical, knowledge filled, argumentative, opinionated individual.
However! Over the past decade, Thanks to psychedelics, places like this, mentors with more refined perspectives, meditation, and practice, I have really worked on it quite a bit. I can still hold a conversation, and make strong points, But I have learned to enjoy being wrong a lot more, Letting people express what they are seeing/feeling more, and to let things go without attempting to interject/correct. A certain softness in presence. I like people to feel comfortable around me. Definitely nowhere near perfect now. And I can usually tell when ive gone back to old patterns, but I see a lot of improvement as well.
Thanks for your thoughts and considerations.
-------------------- --------------------------------------------------- Sit up and meditate, there's no time to contemplate. ------------------------------------------------- I have an international Hitech Psytrance project with a friend: BioChronic I make various form of Psytrance as a solo Project Dendriform
Edited by Psy Baba (02/17/20 02:32 PM)
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Thanatos10
Stranger


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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Psy Baba] 1
#26490349 - 02/17/20 03:57 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Yes as he said and many will tell you, the biggest turn off is when someone is a “know it all” or has to be right (aka having a lot of strong opinions). At that point it’s too much me and not enough “we”.
-------------------- As lightless oblivion devours you, drown in the ever-blooming darkness.
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RJ Tubs 202


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,014
Loc: USA
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Psy Baba] 1
#26493298 - 02/19/20 11:53 AM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Psy Baba said:
I can still hold a conversation, and make strong points, But I have learned to enjoy being wrong a lot more, Letting people express what they are seeing/feeling more, and to let things go without attempting to interject/correct. A certain softness in presence.
I've learned labeling others (and myself) as "wrong" greatly inhibits meaningful social interaction. People's urge to argue is usually not about mathematics, where such an idea is more appropriate. And I agree there's no such thing as a perfect strategy when interacting with people. The best strategy is to not have one, other than being honest and kind.
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Thanatos10
Stranger


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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
#26493319 - 02/19/20 12:06 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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The basics of conversation flow usually won't lead you wrong. Waiting to respond before they do, asking follow ups, listening. As long as you don't try to horn in anything it should be fine.
-------------------- As lightless oblivion devours you, drown in the ever-blooming darkness.
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Anonymous #2
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Thanatos10]
#26493852 - 02/19/20 06:13 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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This is really what you gotta do
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chibiabos
Cosmic Pond Scum



Registered: 03/16/17
Posts: 4,180
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Thanatos10]
#26493946 - 02/19/20 07:02 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Thanatos10 said: The basics of conversation flow usually won't lead you wrong. Waiting to respond before they do, asking follow ups, listening. As long as you don't try to horn in anything it should be fine.
A conversation is sort of like a dance. If you're trying to force your dance partners into submission then you're an asshole.
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Psy Baba
That was zen, This is Tao



Registered: 01/30/06
Posts: 16,430
Loc: The land of Ports.
Last seen: 2 years, 7 months
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: tyrannicalrex] 2
#26495277 - 02/20/20 02:10 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Aight a little update.
Vanilla 2x Beard /2 but not fully committed to clean.
-------------------- --------------------------------------------------- Sit up and meditate, there's no time to contemplate. ------------------------------------------------- I have an international Hitech Psytrance project with a friend: BioChronic I make various form of Psytrance as a solo Project Dendriform
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tyrannicalrex
Strange R



Registered: 04/24/03
Posts: 38,323
Loc: subtropics
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Psy Baba]
#26495309 - 02/20/20 02:23 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Hmmm, critique time. Go clean shaven, I promise it will grow back, lol. Lose the pocket/cargo pants, the color is OK. Lose the pic printed t's, go plain color or striped. The shoes are awesome. Now that I see more of a front view, you look eerily like a friend of mine in FT WT TX.
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psi
TOAST N' JAM


Registered: 09/05/99
Posts: 31,456
Loc: 613
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Re: Can't figure out why Im not easily approachable. [Re: Psy Baba]
#26495310 - 02/20/20 02:25 PM (3 years, 11 months ago) |
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Looking good, I think you look happier in this pic.
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