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Anonymous #1
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Ghosted out of no where
#26432428 - 01/14/20 12:21 AM (4 years, 15 days ago) |
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Has anyone been in love then their love just completely stop talking to you for apparent reason at all? No fight, no argument, just stopped responding to texts and phone calls straight out of the blue.
Has this happened to any of you?
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FruitOfLife
Professional Package Handler


Registered: 05/21/12
Posts: 4,832
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I would say it's more common than not. When a relationship becomes stagnant, a woman will do these little things to basically create unneeded drama and to test and see how you react. If you freak out and blow up her phone then she gets the idea that you have a weakness. Just remain calm and just keep going on with life doing your own thing. In a few days she will reach out to you, but if she doesn't in a week just throw out a text and ask hows she's been.
Or the other scenario is that you did something to piss her off and you don't even know what it is and she is waiting for an apology. So good luck with that one lol.
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Anonymous #2
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You assume OP is talking about a woman because...
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Buckomcdoogle
Atypical obsessive.


Registered: 11/27/19
Posts: 932
Last seen: 7 months, 21 days
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Don't take this the wrong way
"Women don't respect weak men"
You see, im guessing you did/said something at some point that made you look like a weenie.
What she wants is the HAMMER....
-------------------- "Nothing is more dangerous to your creativity than comfort and familiarity" "Nihilism is the most basic truth in existence, the only consistency throughout the world, and the universe is chaos and decay" "Logic leads to nihilism"
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Antigov



Registered: 03/17/19
Posts: 792
Loc: Deep within the BibleBelt
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A chick ghosted me years ago, about a year later I fucked her 18 yr old sister several times even hung out with her at the house. Is that hammer enough LOL
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Buckomcdoogle
Atypical obsessive.


Registered: 11/27/19
Posts: 932
Last seen: 7 months, 21 days
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Re: Ghosted out of no where [Re: Antigov] 1
#26433263 - 01/14/20 02:02 PM (4 years, 15 days ago) |
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Hammer level 100
I bet she was secretly jealous
-------------------- "Nothing is more dangerous to your creativity than comfort and familiarity" "Nihilism is the most basic truth in existence, the only consistency throughout the world, and the universe is chaos and decay" "Logic leads to nihilism"
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Buckomcdoogle
Atypical obsessive.


Registered: 11/27/19
Posts: 932
Last seen: 7 months, 21 days
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A women friend will always be a better "wingman" than any guy.
When women see you have women friends, you are instantly more attractive, because she knows your normal enough to have women friends.
-------------------- "Nothing is more dangerous to your creativity than comfort and familiarity" "Nihilism is the most basic truth in existence, the only consistency throughout the world, and the universe is chaos and decay" "Logic leads to nihilism"
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Anonymous #3
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Quote:
Buckomcdoogle said: A women friend will always be a better "wingman" than any guy.
When women see you have women friends, you are instantly more attractive, because she knows your normal enough to have women friends.
but then the woman friend might get jealous of other women you meet and try to sabotage your chances of getting laid.
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Buckomcdoogle
Atypical obsessive.


Registered: 11/27/19
Posts: 932
Last seen: 7 months, 21 days
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Possible
Or you might end up in a 3 way 
Depends on the girl.
The big problem with people handing out relationship advice is, There are ALWAYS exceptions to the rules ALWAYS.
Everyone is different.
I think what ultimately makes men good at interacting with women is pure intuition. That and confidence.
-------------------- "Nothing is more dangerous to your creativity than comfort and familiarity" "Nihilism is the most basic truth in existence, the only consistency throughout the world, and the universe is chaos and decay" "Logic leads to nihilism"
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Anonymous #2
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Fake it till you make it - some of the best advice I ever got
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Buckomcdoogle
Atypical obsessive.


Registered: 11/27/19
Posts: 932
Last seen: 7 months, 21 days
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You live and you learn
-------------------- "Nothing is more dangerous to your creativity than comfort and familiarity" "Nihilism is the most basic truth in existence, the only consistency throughout the world, and the universe is chaos and decay" "Logic leads to nihilism"
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Anonymous #1
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She is a woman and I am a man in this situation.
We've been seeing eachother for about 2 months or so, about every weekend. We used to text almost everyday. I hadnt had sex with her cause she called herself a demisexual and I wanted to take it slow, which Im proud of. We only made out and cuddled while sitting.
We had a pretty good semi-platonic, semi-intimate relationship and voiced to me she wanted to have sex with me in a cute sorta way. Then the day we were going to do just that, she just disappeared. Its just really weird.
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Buckomcdoogle
Atypical obsessive.


Registered: 11/27/19
Posts: 932
Last seen: 7 months, 21 days
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In my line of work, Im around a lot of women (waitresses and bartenders)
They have guys coming onto them all the time.
Ive talked to a lot of them about their perspective on the "Friend zone"
If you like a girl, and you try to get close to her by being too buddy buddy, you instantly go into the friend zone.
If anything you are just being dishonest about your intentions and covering it up to avoid having a dicey conversation or actually risking it and making a move.
The vast majority of women really love spontaneity.
"voiced to me she wanted to have sex with me in a cute sorta way."
You probably would have gone all the way if you would have just rolled the dice and made a move.
Take charge and go for it next time.
Strike while the iron is hot.
-------------------- "Nothing is more dangerous to your creativity than comfort and familiarity" "Nihilism is the most basic truth in existence, the only consistency throughout the world, and the universe is chaos and decay" "Logic leads to nihilism"
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FruitOfLife
Professional Package Handler


Registered: 05/21/12
Posts: 4,832
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He is spot on.
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Anonymous #1
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Indeed.
Sadly, there is no second chance as she has not responded at all to my texts/calls and its been 8 days already. Whats odd is she said she was a polysexual, which Im fine with. If she met another guy, I would think she would at least think she would stay in contact. Maybe shes afraid to hurt my feelings or something. We didnt really discuss having other partners, it didnt really get brought up. Felt like we didnt need anyone else really. Very mysterious. Another relationship with no closure.
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FruitOfLife
Professional Package Handler


Registered: 05/21/12
Posts: 4,832
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: Indeed.
Sadly, there is no second chance as she has not responded at all to my texts/calls and its been 8 days already. Whats odd is she said she was a polysexual, which Im fine with. If she met another guy, I would think she would at least think she would stay in contact. Maybe shes afraid to hurt my feelings or something. We didnt really discuss having other partners, it didnt really get brought up. Felt like we didnt need anyone else really. Very mysterious. Another relationship with no closure.
Just stop calling and texting her, it won't do any good at this point. Just pretend as if it's a lost cause and maybe in a few weeks she will call or text you and go from there.
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Anonymous #1
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Yeah i guess you're right. I just gotta be patient. I have a bad feeling I wont hear from her again. I hope she's Ok.
Just gotta wait and see I guess.
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Anonymous #4
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Quote:
FruitOfLife said:
Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: Indeed.
Sadly, there is no second chance as she has not responded at all to my texts/calls and its been 8 days already. Whats odd is she said she was a polysexual, which Im fine with. If she met another guy, I would think she would at least think she would stay in contact. Maybe shes afraid to hurt my feelings or something. We didnt really discuss having other partners, it didnt really get brought up. Felt like we didnt need anyone else really. Very mysterious. Another relationship with no closure.
Just stop calling and texting her, it won't do any good at this point. Just pretend as if it's a lost cause and maybe in a few weeks she will call or text you and go from there.
Worst advice ever! Do you know where she lives? Can you rent a large heart shaped costume? Get the idea? You need to make a grand gesture! Just don't break into her house or anything. Worst case scenario she thinks your a weirdo and never talks to you again which is what she's doing now anyway! But why would you want to be with someone like that anyway. Best case scenario it's a story you tell your children one day.
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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LOL. As much as I can see the humour in your suggestion I feel it's far better to set ones sights realistically in such situations.
She's gone. No closure. No way of finding out what it is you did wrong. It sucks.
Such is life. It aint all flowers and roses.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Anonymous #1
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I do know where she lives. Perhaps I should leave a note for her?
She is moving next week to somewhere I dont know of. Shes works the weekend, driving around but is home on weekdays. Perhaps next week i should try find her at her place.
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Don't do any of that please man. That just makes you come off like a stalker.
Be realistic. If she wanted ANYTHING from you again would she be doing this?
Women switch off differently to the way we do. It is what it is.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Anonymous #1
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I just hate being abandoned like this. Its happened to me too many times with other ladies. The other times were my partially my fault but this time it wasnt.
Not knowing why is the worst part.
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Anonymous #2
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You know why. She doesn’t want to keep hanging out with you. No big deal.
If you’re so desperate, use a dating app. One of my best friends - a dirty, jobless hippie with a heart of gold and the face of a tired horse - found a gf on Zoosk. I just met her yesterday and she’s a normal human! Pleasant in conversation and pretty attractive too.
Fuck this ghosting jerk lady
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Anonymous #1
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She was one of the kindest ladies Ive ever met in my life. Patient and understanding. Really special woman. She even called me Sweetie only like a month after seeing each other. Texted almost every day. Its so hard to let her go. A rare person who I trusted as a friend and as a lover.
And then shes gone with no goodbye. Its so tough.
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: Its so tough.

Believe me brother, it could be far, far, far, far, far, far worse.
Chalk it up to experiece and keep your head held high.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Anonymous #3
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I always feel like it’s a little cowardly for girls to just ghost a guy she was dating. Like basically she didn’t have enough courage to tell you it’s over because she is afraid of confrontation and conflict and she thinks it’s just easier to ghost you instead of explain why.
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Buckomcdoogle
Atypical obsessive.


Registered: 11/27/19
Posts: 932
Last seen: 7 months, 21 days
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"SHOULD I CALL HER?"
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
only clingy women like clingy men, and that just a recipe for a co dependent relationship.
If she doesn't respect you enough to be honest with you, don't waste your time.
"Sadly, there is no second chance"
There's actually a lot of second chances man. Don't beat your self up over it.
Move on
-------------------- "Nothing is more dangerous to your creativity than comfort and familiarity" "Nihilism is the most basic truth in existence, the only consistency throughout the world, and the universe is chaos and decay" "Logic leads to nihilism"
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Buckomcdoogle
Atypical obsessive.


Registered: 11/27/19
Posts: 932
Last seen: 7 months, 21 days
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I love how Joan in Madmen put it
"Men don't take the time to end things. They ignore you until you insist on a declaration of hate."
Same could go for women though.
-------------------- "Nothing is more dangerous to your creativity than comfort and familiarity" "Nihilism is the most basic truth in existence, the only consistency throughout the world, and the universe is chaos and decay" "Logic leads to nihilism"
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nooneman


Registered: 04/24/09
Posts: 14,561
Loc: Utah
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I hear it's becoming like the new way to do things, but I've never actually had anyone do this to me who I was fucking. I've had friends disappear, that's one thing, and it's totally fine, but all the people who I actually fucked were nice enough to say something.
I don't really think this is necessarily a bad thing as a trend in society. I think it could actually benefit everyone in the long run. If a relationship isn't working, I don't think sitting down for a big discussion about it ever accomplishes much. I know some people really want to know "why" or whatever, but it doesn't ever make any difference, and a lot of times there is no why, and the answer is never satisfying, etc. etc. I just don't see it as having a better outcome discussing it vs. not.
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Anonymous #5
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Re: Ghosted out of no where [Re: nooneman] 2
#26436880 - 01/16/20 01:57 PM (4 years, 13 days ago) |
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Ghosting is so common now, it's common practice by both men and women. To be thinking "oh I hope she's OK" or "maybe if I keep trying she'll answer because she may have not seen my attempts to contact her yet, even though I've tried 20 times already in 1 week" it's a little naive.
I am a man and I have ghosted people for no necessary explanation. Any time the ghosted tried frantically to get in contact with me, it fucking infuriated me and made me respect the person much less.
For me, general rule of thumb is, never send more than 1 message per response. If they don't answer then simply accept the most likey reason and move on
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Anonymous #1
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Ive descided that this weekend Im going to try physically track her down. I demand answers. Being ghosted for no apparent reason after months of intereactions is not acceptable to me. I need closure and Im sick of being ghosted with no explaination. Ive had enough of it.
I also found an ad on missed connections craigslist that sounds like it could be her, Im going to respond to it.
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FruitOfLife
Professional Package Handler


Registered: 05/21/12
Posts: 4,832
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: Ive descided that this weekend Im going to try physically track her down. I demand answers. Being ghosted for no apparent reason after months of intereactions is not acceptable to me. I need closure and Im sick of being ghosted with no explaination. Ive had enough of it.
I also found an ad on missed connections craigslist that sounds like it could be her, Im going to respond to it.
This is pretty creepy man, no offense but you sound very stalker like right now.
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bodhisatta 
Smurf real estate agent


Registered: 04/30/13
Posts: 61,889
Loc: Milky way
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: Ive descided that this weekend Im going to try physically track her down. I demand answers. Being ghosted for no apparent reason after months of intereactions is not acceptable to me. I need closure and Im sick of being ghosted with no explaination. Ive had enough of it.
I also found an ad on missed connections craigslist that sounds like it could be her, Im going to respond to it.
Maybe this is why you were ghosted. This doesn't just sound like what a loser does, this IS what a loser does
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Ghosted out of no where [Re: bodhisatta]
#26437547 - 01/16/20 09:34 PM (4 years, 13 days ago) |
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Well thats not helpful at all!
I dont care if its creepy. I deserve some closure after all the time we spent together. I want some answers.
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Please, please, please don't do this.
I could give you a thousand reasons why, but the crux of it is that you don't deserve anything.
Seriously, you're coming off like a petty, entitled child right now.
NOT a good look.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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bodhisatta 
Smurf real estate agent


Registered: 04/30/13
Posts: 61,889
Loc: Milky way
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: Well thats not helpful at all!
I dont care if its creepy. I deserve some closure after all the time we spent together. I want some answers.
You don't deserve anything. You want answers. Sometimes you don't get them. Grow up.
Even if you find this girl and meet her in person you're never going to get your answer. You're going to get insulted.
If you keep up behavior like this ghosting will be the least of your worries. You won't even find yourself in opportunities to be ghosted.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Ghosted out of no where [Re: bodhisatta]
#26438017 - 01/17/20 08:15 AM (4 years, 12 days ago) |
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I have to at least try. If i dont try then I will regret it later. And I hate feeling regret.
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Anonymous #2
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: I have to at least try. If i dont try then I will regret it later. And I hate feeling regret.
Oh you’ll feel regret alright, but only if you go through with this creep move.
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Anonymous #5
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At this point it's either trolling or its straight up skitzo delusional creepy stalker psycho. Youre a real fucker if youre serious about your most recent posts
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SporeJunkie
Pöåšt Šhïttēr



Registered: 11/30/18
Posts: 2,106
Loc: TheOnlyTenISee
Last seen: 2 months, 12 days
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I know it probably doesnt matter at all, however, I’d like to +1 the rest of these fine gentlemen. What you are being told is fact. If you go through with this you will be insulted and hurt way more in the end. Id just let this one go man.
-------------------- Royale with cheese
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: I have to at least try. If i dont try then I will regret it later. And I hate feeling regret.
Stop being a coward.
Grow up.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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TheStallionMang
Do U know who yur fuckin with?


Registered: 10/18/17
Posts: 4,531
Loc:
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You should forget about her. It's done
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bodhisatta 
Smurf real estate agent


Registered: 04/30/13
Posts: 61,889
Loc: Milky way
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: I have to at least try. If i dont try then I will regret it later. And I hate feeling regret.
I think you're just trolling now. Or genuinely that ignorant, selfish, egotistical, and entitled. Either way not cool.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Ghosted out of no where [Re: bodhisatta]
#26438293 - 01/17/20 10:33 AM (4 years, 12 days ago) |
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Not trolling, just tired of being ghosted with no explaination.
I dont expect anyone to understand why I compelled to seek an answer.
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Anonymous #1
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And since the majority of you are againist my plan to find out the truth, looks like i have to ghost myself from my own thread.
How ironic. Such is my fate, i guess. Oh well. Peace.
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bodhisatta 
Smurf real estate agent


Registered: 04/30/13
Posts: 61,889
Loc: Milky way
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Everyone understands just fine that your perspective is fucked and you need to find some way to increase your maturity.
You can't even get your mind out of the box to see how bad the box your in looks from an outside perspective.
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tyrannicalrex
Strange R



Registered: 04/24/03
Posts: 38,323
Loc: subtropics
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Oh the games people play now Every night and every day now Never meaning what they say now Never saying what they mean And they wile away the hours In their ivory towers Till they're covered up with flowers In the back of a black limousine La-da da da da da da da La-da da da da da de Talking 'bout you and me And the games people play Oh we make one another cry Break a heart then we say goodbye Cross our hearts and we hope to die That the other was to blame Neither one will give in So we gaze at our eight by ten Thinking 'bout the things that might have been It's a dirty rotten shame People walking up to you Singing glory hallelulia And they're tryin to sock it to you In the name of the Lord They're gonna teach you how to meditate Read your horoscope, cheat your fate And further more to hell with hate Come on and get on board Look around tell me what you see What's happening to you and me God grant me the serenity To remember who I am 'Cause you've given up your sanity For your pride and your vanity Turns your back on humanity And you don't give a da da da da da
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FruitOfLife
Professional Package Handler


Registered: 05/21/12
Posts: 4,832
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Haven't seen OP in a couple days. I wonder if he ended up on the news for stalking and murdering the girl that rejected him?
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Buckomcdoogle
Atypical obsessive.


Registered: 11/27/19
Posts: 932
Last seen: 7 months, 21 days
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Something tells me said girl was getting Dd down on the low.
Meet Mr right May he have mercy on your body
-------------------- "Nothing is more dangerous to your creativity than comfort and familiarity" "Nihilism is the most basic truth in existence, the only consistency throughout the world, and the universe is chaos and decay" "Logic leads to nihilism"
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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I'll never understand people who seek out emotional advice, receive basically the same message from everyone, and then go and do the complete opposite thing to what everyone is suggesting anyway.
I don't know whether it's due to obstinacy or misguided belief or what, but it's like 'come on man, we have social norms for a reason, and when 90% of people are against you, you can damn sure bet there's a good reason for it'.
I hope OP at least redeems himself somewhat by reporting back (and hopefully something to the effect that he's learned something).
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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FruitOfLife
Professional Package Handler


Registered: 05/21/12
Posts: 4,832
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Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said: I'll never understand people who seek out emotional advice, receive basically the same message from everyone, and then go and do the complete opposite thing to what everyone is suggesting anyway.
I don't know whether it's due to obstinacy or misguided belief or what, but it's like 'come on man, we have social norms for a reason, and when 90% of people are against you, you can damn sure bet there's a good reason for it'.
I hope OP at least redeems himself somewhat by reporting back (and hopefully something to the effect that he's learned something).
Because he wanted us to tell him what he wanted to hear. When he realized how wrong he was, he couldn't handle the truth and decided to do what he was going to do all along. He opened up on here to in a way get permission to confront her because that's what he wanted to do the whole time.
It's obvious he has not had much success with women in the past and unfortunately if he continues to act the way he is, he will never have success with them. Like you said, when 90% of the people are telling you something then you should probably listen!
--------------------
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Phantom45
Traveler


Registered: 06/08/19
Posts: 188
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Quote:
Buckomcdoogle said: Something tells me said girl was getting Dd down on the low.Quote:
Xactly was i was thinkin reading through this whole thread she hoed you out man why would you even want closure shes either manipulative or getting fucked by someone else probally both fuck that bish move on
Edited by Phantom45 (01/19/20 11:34 AM)
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pirate-blues



Registered: 10/15/12
Posts: 13,655
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Re: Ghosted out of no where [Re: Phantom45]
#26442090 - 01/19/20 06:05 PM (4 years, 10 days ago) |
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I'm sorry bud, but she's committed to ghosting you. You need to let it go. It's a shit thing to do on her part, and you deserve and will find someone better. Chin up, listen to some Lizzo or something and get back out there.
I've been ghosted by guys before, once was after an 8 month relationship. It hurt bad. It was a shitty ass immature thing to do, and someone who will do that isn't worth your time.
Time to move on.
Edited by pirate-blues (01/19/20 06:11 PM)
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