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OfflineIntoTheMaelstrom
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Registered: 01/06/20
Posts: 37
Last seen: 3 years, 11 months
Re: Social addiction? [Re: VP123]
    #26423009 - 01/08/20 01:51 PM (4 years, 1 month ago)

I’m not saying it’s just the withdrawal that is bad, nor am I defining an “addiction” (“compulsion”, “strong inclination”, etc as per the dictionary) based on withdrawal symptoms, but rather by the “compulsive”, “strongly inclined” part.

As for what’s negative in terms of “indulgence”, I pretty much think that wilfully repeating the same pattern of behaviour which you know from experience keeps getting you into rather dark, dodgy places is not a positive thing. And there you have a fundamental difference between the diabetic and my friend: the diabetic needs insulin to live, the other option would be dying or close enough; as for my friend, her survival does not depend on having a boyfriend, that is a choice, and she has plenty of other possibilities to choose from, and yet the “compulsion”/“strong inclination” is to always find whatever dodgy boyfriend, because her happiness totally depends on it.


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“I drank to drown my sorrows, but the damned things learnt how to swim” (Frida Khalo, 1907-1954)


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Invisibleredgreenvines
irregular verb
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Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 37,703
Re: Social addiction? [Re: IntoTheMaelstrom]
    #26423098 - 01/08/20 02:46 PM (4 years, 1 month ago)

the only distinction I came up with was
Quote:

where caring for other's well being is intact




otherwise addiction and identity overlap and intertwine variously.


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:confused: _ :brainfart:🧠  _ :finger:


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OfflineIntoTheMaelstrom
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Registered: 01/06/20
Posts: 37
Last seen: 3 years, 11 months
Re: Social addiction? [Re: redgreenvines]
    #26423256 - 01/08/20 04:29 PM (4 years, 1 month ago)

You do have a point there. But then, again, identity overlaps and intertwined with just about anything that makes us.


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“I drank to drown my sorrows, but the damned things learnt how to swim” (Frida Khalo, 1907-1954)


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Invisiblelaughingdog
Stranger
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Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 4,829
Re: Social addiction? [Re: IntoTheMaelstrom]
    #26423311 - 01/08/20 05:11 PM (4 years, 1 month ago)

Quote:

IntoTheMaelstrom said:
Random thought: is social addiction a thing? ....

I know these two people, the comparison of whom lead me to this thought: one is a girl who states she “cannot be alone”, and by this she means that she absolutely needs to have a boyfriend, or she will be miserable all the time as, the way I see it, she can’t self-validate and needs to find validation (and indeed anything resembling some form of happiness) through someone else, a boyfriend/partner in this case, with whom she needs to have a very close, deep connection, deep to the point of eroding the sense of self more often than not.

The other, which is functionally the very opposite to the former, is a guy who states something like “the only purpose in life is making connections [with people]”, and by connections he means shallow, volatile relationships that never last long (neither does he want them to) with completely random individuals that amuse him today, but not tomorrow and become, therefore, easily discardable. Shallow and ephemeral as his “connections” may be, it is allegedly through them alone that he is happy.

Again, these two individuals are, in social terms, functionally the opposite of one-another, and yet they share something very powerful that completely defines them and makes them pretty much the same: they *NEED* to be connected to other people in order to be happy, that’s what their lives are about.

Given this, can we not say that there is a form of addiction going on there? ....




Pretty much primates are a sort of herd animal, but the term used for primates is a "troop".
As in a troop of baboons or gorillas.
  https://duckduckgo.com/?q=primates+social+groups&ia=web

So in a general sense, it is normal for primates, to need one another.

You phrase the question in broad general terms, but then it turns out, it is about 2 individuals. Of course I don't know them, but from your description, I imagine many would question, the idea that either of them is happy in any deep sense.

There are probably more sick & disturbed ways for primates, especially humans to relate to one another; than the healthy ways, which all have compassion in common.

As the phrase "heavy is the head that wears the crown", implies the more aware, compassionate, responsible, and nurturing of their social group a person is, the less personal freedom, such a person ends up with. So the most socially involved person, is paradoxically, in another sense perhaps the most isolated.


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OfflineRJ Tubs 202
Male

Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,029
Loc: USA Flag
Last seen: 5 days, 12 hours
Re: Social addiction? [Re: IntoTheMaelstrom]
    #26426839 - 01/10/20 04:13 PM (4 years, 1 month ago)

I believe many people find the intimacy of human interaction to be deeply nourishing and fulfilling. Some people are so damaged by trauma that this is not possible - they see people as a threat, and place a high priority on avoiding human interaction, intimacy, and relationships. The "down and out"  folks who wander the streets and talk to themselves have adapted to a way of life where they have imaginary people to talk to with no risk of being hurt.


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OfflineNicodArleone
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Registered: 12/31/19
Posts: 59
Last seen: 2 years, 8 months
Re: Social addiction? [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
    #26430526 - 01/13/20 12:24 AM (4 years, 1 month ago)

The average man is hooked to his fellow men, while the warrior is hooked only to infinity.
Carlos Castaneda


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Invisibleredgreenvines
irregular verb
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Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 37,703
Re: Social addiction? [Re: NicodArleone]
    #26431068 - 01/13/20 11:09 AM (4 years, 1 month ago)

it seems even velvet worms have families.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Onychophora#Sociality


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Invisiblelaughingdog
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Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 4,829
Re: Social addiction? [Re: redgreenvines]
    #26432386 - 01/13/20 11:23 PM (4 years, 1 month ago)

its not always an either or choice, these men alternate, between a life of trapping alone, and village life.

"Happy people a year in the taiga" a Werner-Herzog movie


"Yuri V
6 years ago
Yep. Except Werner Herzog provides mostly commentary and editing (and of course throws all his weight to promote the film). All of the footage is by a Russian team led by Dmitry Yasyukov."

Dmitry Yasyukov on youtube:



https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLcHbZZPce_ZMUuYr5u6sxy3gsxLYLKiPv

https://www.amazon.com/Happy-People-Taiga-Werner-Herzog/dp/B00AXYZZ6C/ref=sr_1_3?keywords=happy+people+a+year+in+the+taiga&qid=1578982779&s=music&sr=1-3-catcorr#customerReviews


Edited by laughingdog (01/13/20 11:38 PM)


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OfflineBuckomcdoogle
Atypical obsessive.
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Registered: 11/27/19
Posts: 932
Last seen: 8 months, 8 days
Re: Social addiction? [Re: laughingdog] * 1
    #26433460 - 01/14/20 03:30 PM (4 years, 1 month ago)

Fame is certainly addictive.

Look at any showbiz story that ended badly.

You get used to all the constant excitement/attention and when it all goes away there's an enormous void in your life.

There's only a hand full of child/teenage stars I can think of that didn't completely crash and burn.

"HE BECAME THE KING OF BUBBLEGUM ROCK"


--------------------
"Nothing is more dangerous to your creativity than comfort and familiarity"

"Nihilism is the most basic truth in existence,
the only consistency throughout the world, and the universe is
chaos and decay"
"Logic leads to nihilism"



Edited by Buckomcdoogle (01/14/20 03:34 PM)


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OfflineMr. D Green
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Registered: 12/14/19
Posts: 179
Last seen: 2 years, 1 month
Re: Social addiction? [Re: Buckomcdoogle]
    #26440770 - 01/18/20 08:30 PM (4 years, 29 days ago)

Independence from thy self is toxic, independence from every thing but one's self is golden. Interacting with ones surroundings is stimulating..understand?? We as advance beings need this to "function" properly. "Social addiction" is an attempt to run or hide from ones self, for whatever reason.


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OfflineBuckomcdoogle
Atypical obsessive.
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Registered: 11/27/19
Posts: 932
Last seen: 8 months, 8 days
Re: Social addiction? [Re: Mr. D Green]
    #26440948 - 01/18/20 11:00 PM (4 years, 28 days ago)

Look at how alcoholism destroys native communities in the rural parts of the world.

It's what happens when people in an isolated society isolate themselves even further.

Alaska is #1 in suicides.

People need people.

Im definitely not a "people person" but I think one of the most rewarding things I do on a regular basis is interact with people.

The only way you ever become better at interacting with/persuading people is by just talking to people.

Being good with people will get you just as far as hard work.

I know a few bartenders that act fake as fuck 2 days a week and pocket a grand or 2.


--------------------
"Nothing is more dangerous to your creativity than comfort and familiarity"

"Nihilism is the most basic truth in existence,
the only consistency throughout the world, and the universe is
chaos and decay"
"Logic leads to nihilism"



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OfflineRJ Tubs 202
Male

Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,029
Loc: USA Flag
Last seen: 5 days, 12 hours
Re: Social addiction? [Re: Buckomcdoogle]
    #26440977 - 01/18/20 11:36 PM (4 years, 28 days ago)

Relationships are the most important part of my life because I don't know of any aspect of existence that's of greater value.


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